"Let's See Some Sperm!"

OK, so I'm a pervert. Somebody's gotta be a pervert, after all. And it might as well be me. And if I gotta be a pervert this here is the perfect place to be it.

I mean this town has naked bike rides, naked gay parades, 2 count 'em two! nude beaches, gals holding hands, guys sucking face, blowjobs in the bushes... My little antics are just part of the ambience. Downright tame if you ask me. Harmless entertainment.

And this here, by the way, could be an ideal perfect day for me to be a pervert. Fall weather. Warm but not too warm, clouds but not too clouds and most important, there won't be too many of the fuddy regulars around to give me grief over 'inappropriate behavior'. Inappropriate behavior is my middle name! and nuts to 'em.

I pull my veh into the nearly empty park lot and back up against the wall. I'm out and in, scanning back and forth, checking out the top level. All is deserted - not a soul in sight. Down the south steps to the 2nd level - likewise emptiness. I'm about to say where is everybody when I look around the bushes and down the short lower north steps to the main beach. Here I finally spot some attendance - there's about 4 or 5 naked guys sitting around on the sand, looking at their dicks.

Those nude beaches I told you about? Well this is one of them.

Now, just what these deadbeats have in mind, I have no idea, but I'm horny with a capitol H and I'm going to get my kicks! I'm going to turn this so-called family-friendly nude beach into my own personal den of debauchery. It's just too bad there aren't any female of the species about the environs today. I don't have to tell you I love seeing tits and I LOVE seeing pussy and I just know those females LOVE!! seeing my cock-hard rock, rock-hard cock, stiffy, boner, erection!

Speaking of erections...

Hat off, shirt up and off, shorts down and off, step out of my sandals, lean back and here it comes baby... up and Adam! Hardon on the way.

I peruse all that empty grass in front of me and my imagination takes me back in time. Sunny summer days, naked bodies left, right, front and center! Behind too, if I turn around. Tits, cunts, dicks, feeling shy? lay on your front and I see Uranus! Yeah! And back to the present and I can feel that bad boy rising!

(Now here is where I'd like to tell you all about my massive erection, stands straight up, rubs my belly, squirts gallons &c. But... well, we are what we are after all. And there are advantages in fact to being shall we say under-endowed. I can walk around with a semi all day and nobody squawks. Fully hard it's like "Does he have a... or does he just stick out...?" And by the time they figure it out it's too late for anyone to throw a fuss. And I'm cool... What? Me horny?)

So here I stand, on the grass in a public park in a major US city, naked as a jaybird and boned to the bone. There's other nudists here as well, so what the hey. I'm as innocent as a newborn babe, believe me. Blending right into the scenery.

Now, in the center of all this grass there is a round concrete structure about a foot high, with a big metal plate locked down on top. I call it the well-cover, although I don't really know if it actually is a well or what. It's been here like forever and is totally useless except for one thing. If I stand on top of this construct I can see over the wall and check out the entire top level of the park. I can see cars incoming, people strolling, cops God Forbid! in visiting... in short, I can see trouble coming.

And they can't see me - not below the shoulders anyway and that's where the inappropriate behavior occurs, you know what I mean.

So I step up on the well-cover, glance toward the beach - no movement; out at the water - no boats no swimmers; over the wall - no activity whatsoever. I'm really, truly all alone here. And what am I here for anyway? I grab my dick and give it a couple slow strokes. Oh, my! That's nice.

And next I stroll. 'Cause really, that's one of life's little (not that little! Don't take me too literally here!) pleasures. Just walking, while that rock-hard cock points the way, swaying side-to-side nicely, give it a bounce and it springs right back up and goddam! it feels good. I could practically shoot off right here and now.

I climb to the top of the steps, exposing myself to the upper park and in fact the whole world if the whole world was out there looking. But it's not. Nobody's looking. So I ever so casually stroll myself not to mention my boner back and forth across the grass up here and I want to jack off so bad I can hardly stand it but I want to stay out of jail so bad I'm not about to press my luck too far.

I'm about to head down the other, north set of steps, but then I remember the dudes at the beach and I figure it's best if I don't make a spectacle of myself in front of them. Don't press it! I'm telling myself.

So I turn, stroll back across the grass, turn again, face the street, give a dick-wag or three and quit screwing around you pervert! turn around and head back down to my private sanctuary where anything goes today. Oh, yeah! This is a good day to be horny!

Of course there's no reason to rush things. I can take my time with today's kicks. A happy ending is assured. All in it's own good time.

So the next thing I do is I head down the lower south steps to the small, sandy, unoccupied beach here. I sit myself down on a comfortable rock and admire the scenery. Across this large lake is a smaller city, outlined by the mountain range in the distance. To the south is a floating bridge that connects an island suburb to our fair city. And beyond that is a large scenic mountain. Beautiful!

Even more beautiful when there are naked bodies out there in the water and in here on the beach. Much more beautiful to my way of thinking. But those lazy crazy spacey days of summer are gone for this year, unfortunately. We're heading for the doldrums of wintertime and I haven't got much more nude beach kicks to get in this year. Today may be the last and I'd danged well better make the most of it.

By now I've got the limber leg, but that's alright. My hardon won't be gone for long on a day this horny. I head myself on back up to that well-cover, look out the outlook - no trouble in sight - and stroke it on up again. It seems kind of odd I have to admit that nobody has budged off of the main beach today and maybe I should just check that out. I mean who knows. Some chicks could have showed up and there could be a full-fledged orgy going on right now!

Yeah, right! It'd be the first time ever, and even though there's no chance, now I'm thinking about it maybe I better just give the main beach a quick stroll.

Back down the short steps, a few more quick strokes just so's I look my best for the fellows (to hell with 'em, after all!), and I head north across the thin strip of sand that separates the two beaches.

Ahh! These deadheads! They're still just sitting there staring off into space. They got no idea how to have a good time in my not so humble opinion. They're all just taking up valuable real estate, no good for anyone or anything! Losers! Worthless idiots! Nuts to them! If they won't be any fun I'll just head up to the grass again and continue entertaining myself by myself!

I round the corner and start toward the steps. And then, looking ahead - Hello darling! Where did you come from? It's a female, definitely, absotively, posorutely a female, bundled head to toe against a possible fall chill, but for sure female none the less. And where did she come from? She must have slipped in while I was sitting on that rock. And now she's on her way out. I've got to move fast!

"Oh, hi!" I shout. And I've got her.

She starts to turn and, "Is this your first time at the park?", I inquire, and don't give me any crap! I know this conversation is trite and stupid, but that's not the point. The point is... well I'll show you the point. I'll show her the point, 'cause my stiff member is pointing directly at her and she can't miss it.

"Did you know it was a nude beach?" I cleverly ask next. And she assures me that indeed it is her first time here and indeed she did not know it was a nude beach. Now she starts to turn and maybe you don't think I know what I'm doing and I'm going to blow it, but have no fear. She's on the hook alright! She just doesn't know it yet.

And before she can slip away I ask where she's from and wham! the trap is lowered, the hook is set, she's taken the bait and she's mine! She turns again and answers politely, and how can she not. It's how she was brought up after all. It's how we all were brought up.

And how can she not notice my hard cock pointing out straight at her as I stand here naked, hands on hips, jutting forward ever so slightly. And I continue this idiotic conversation and she continues replying to this idiotic conversation and I don't even know what we're talking about. All I can think about is how totally goddamed horny I am, and I'm clenching my butt muscles and trying to squeeze out a dab of pre-cum and unh! there it is I can feel it! And if the sun were only shining it'd be glistening but it's not and it's not but I'll take what I can get.

Now I'm concentrating on squeezing out a little more of that shiny, slippery fluid and I'm thinking how hot it would be if I could dribble a little dollop right in front of her and even better if I could get a nice string dangling from my firm dickhead. The convo is still going strong and even though this broad is looking me straight in the eye and not where she should obviously be looking, I know she can see what I want her to see and oh, man! What a great day this is turning out to be! And don't bother calling me a pervert, by the way. I already said I'm a pervert, didn't I.

So the conversation is like on auto-pilot at this point and I'm really having my way with this bim and really feeling great about what a great world this is and what a great city this is and what a great park this is and what a great day this is &c, when suddenly...

"Let's see some sperm!" she says.

And I'm like... and I'm like... and I'm like... Jesus! I freeze.

Did she just say what I think she said? It's not possible! Is it? Then...

"Jack off for me. Do it!"

And I can't believe this and I don't believe this, but if this is real it's an opportunity I'm not about to miss. I can practically hear the sirens and I can practically feel an entire SWAT team jumping my ass and I can practically see myself branded as a sex offender for life as I slowly reach my right hand toward my throbbing dick and as I slowly grasp it.

And when I realize there's no sirens, no SWAT team, no sex offender registry... and when she smiles slightly and nods her head a little I start to stroke. And, oh yeah! Double goddam! I mean this is nice. This is nicer than nice. This is downright heaven right here on earth blatantly nakedly masturbating in a public park right in front of a female.

The broad is still looking me straight in the eye. She's got a little bitty smile on her face and she's really I mean really! doing things for me and it won't be long now! I take a short step forward, to the foot of the concrete steps. She takes a short step forward to the top of the steps and why are you looking in my eyes for crissakes! Look at my dick! LOOK AT MY DICK!

And then finally she looks down, stares straight at my ramrod hard like a bar of steel penis and my flailing pounding pumping fist and UNHHH! I can feel my mouth drop open, my head roll back and from the depths of my balls...

...I shoot a wad of white, hot sperm right onto the step in front of her.

And then another one - farther this time. It reaches the grass right at her feet. And I'd like to be shooting buckets and covering her with my come, but it's like I told you. No gallons for me. The next few spurts dribble out and I let them run down my hand as I slowly ease up on my stroking.

The woman is still smiling at me, looking me right in the eye again. I can feel a big old shit-eating grin taking over my face as she says, "Good job!"

'Good job' - just like she's complimenting a two-year-old for eating an entire spoonful of strained peas. Christ! Give my bald head a pat while you're at it. Patronize me. That's alright. I got my kicks!

Then finally she says, "Thank you so much!" turns and heads for the exit.

I glance over my shoulder, and the deadwood is all sitting there mouths agape without even the balls to be envious no doubt. They ain't seen nuthin' like this before, I can tell you, much less done nuthin' like this before. I'm feeling on top of the world as I step up away from them and onto the grass. And then as I make my trek across the lawn I realize I'm rapidly losing my horn-buzz; I'm coming down from my come-high.

I'm starting to get nervous, in fact. I've just jacked off in front of an audience in the middle of a public park! There could still be repercussions from this. I've got to vacate!

So quick-like I pull on my clothes - not even zipping up I'm in such a hurry. Hotfoot it to the car and I'm out of here practically before I get the engine started - fleeing the scene of the perv, so to speak.

Left at the stop sign, up a long hill, make a quick right, up another hill and I'm lost in the twisting streets. Now I can finally relax. Realizing that my fly is still gaping wide open, I reach in and start to play with my dick. Wow! What a great day, what a great park, what a great city, what a great world!

Triple goddam!