Literotica: Feedback and Conduct

I want to say that despite "needing to be said" this well-written piece would be ignored by those who should read it and take it heart. Then I had a little change of heart and now I think some of those hopefully former cretins might have read this after all. I hope so.

Thanks for taking the time.

I am amazed not only : at the tone of most 'criticism' but its anonymous nature. I only signed up so that I could tell authors I either appreciated their stories or in order to leave a meaningful vote.

I may not like a story - but I do appreciate the guts it takes to put it up there.

I see good feedback as precise, offered as a gift to the receiver - therefore requiring thought in choosing what to give - that they can accept or reject as their right.

So I found your article informative, humourous and rung so many bells with me I want to become a campanologist.

Keep it up (if that is right vicar! lol)

P. Grimm

I just wanted to let you know that my submission about this has come out, I don't concentrate on all the same things you do, but I'm rather tickled that we both chose to write about this topic at about the same time =)

You can find mine under the title, "What I Don't Understand"

=D

Good work! *HUGS*

...both what you wrote and the public comments(42 when I read it)that followed. I can't remember all the names, but thebullet, sack and cloudy and others summed it up pretty well. After 154 submissions to Lit, I've received lots of feedback and generally it was okay. With the public comment feature, it's gotten much more negative and yeah, anonymous is generally the most negative though not always.

For a time I went through public comments and attacked the anonymous public comment that was no more than hateful. Sack is right, too many people reading these stories seem to think they are real. They're not for the most part. The wrongly titled Loving Wives section followed by Interracial seem to generate the worst of the worst. I've become convinced over a period of time that there are people out there waiting for an interracial story just to vote a 1 and send an actual anonymous feedback filled with racial slurs regarding the story and me. Loving Wives, somehow the "dirty slut" should be killed at the least and the husband, well, the fate that awaits him sometimes is far worse. And why? I don't know. It's just a story 99% of the time. Yet these hate filled comments continue and then I have to wonder why people keep coming back to a category they hate so much.

So yeah Cloudy, I wish people would register. I wish people would send feedback with an valid email address, but in the strictess sense of all of this, it's still anonymous. You can send me something as TwistedPlayr but I still don't really know who you are. I guess that's why I can't understand the cowardice of hiding behind anonymous despite those that do it and defend it.

So yeah, take away the audios by the Dawn and the poems, and we have a lot of written stories and I don't see anything changing. Sure you can delete public comments and I've deleted one but it was darn vulgar I just had to in my opinion. Otherwise, good or bad, I leave them up. Feedback is always appreciated and if we receive feedback we always respond. I guess because half the stuff written by us is in the nature of a stroke story, the feedback isn't constructive, but it's not bad either. Fun stuff isn't it?

Nice job!

Very good! However as writers, why do we write? We obviously are not in it for the money; at least not here. I believe a writer should do their work for his or her, own reasons. Possibly just for the love of creating something new, that was in your mind and nowhere else, prior to you placing it on the web. Are we all Feedback Junkies? I think not. Remember only about eight percent of the people in the world have the ability to put words down on paper that make sense in a story.

The lower five percent of the people; usually can’t even read, so our concerns for their opinions have no practical purpose. The next step up; are people who for some unknown reason are jealous of abilities, which are beyond them, or worse yet afraid to post their own work. What do they do? They become critical of someone else’s work. They don’t know the individual, so they have no concerns as to the individual writers feelings.

There is an old saying that sets forth a general truth, which has gained credit through long use.

“Writers write. People who cannot write … teach. People who cannot teach … criticize.”

We are all doing what we do for our own enjoyment and to share our thoughts with the world. If you wish to open your work for critical viewpoints, be ready to accept the consequences, good and bad. Should you get a bad one once in a while, roll with the punches and consider the source. If by some horrible turn of events, you receive only bad criticism, as I have seen on some story Feedback, you should probably heed the warning and take a long look at your own work; and just maybe look for the assistance of your peers. I know that most of the writers would not mind helping a fledging writer.

Good article.

All writers have war stories about the feedback they get and their reaction to same.

My personal fav was early in my writing career. I posted a rape fantasy that was by any standards extremely mild. But I got feedback from one person who told me that she knew where I lived and was going to take me to court and sue me.

Twice I have actually taken reader advice in molding the direction of a story and both times I fell flat on my face. Take that for what it is worth.

Usually the hate mail is restricted to a couple of story categories. If you don't want hate mail, write Romance stories. THe worst that can happen is they won't like it. But they won't threaten to kill your first born.

A "Loving Wife" story is sure to generate hate mail unless it is a totally alien genre within the category (i.e., no cheating). "Interracial" stories bring out the bigots. And "Nonconsent" stories attract feminists with hair under their arms who want to cut your balls off.

Hey, you take the bitter with the batter.

I know whereof you speak, brother (or sister). I have over 65 stories on this site, and while most of them get good responses, I've gotten some feedback that would curl your hair. This is usually in response to cheating wife stories, which I happen to like. I had one guy who called me a "sick, sick bastard," just because I wrote about a wife who was screwing around on business trips. I almost have to laugh at these types. Do they not know what's going to happen when they read a story in the Loving Wives section that has the word temptation in the title? I've also been called a spineless wimp because I like to have the husbands forgive the wives if that's what's called for. I don't know, maybe they're just so insecure that they have to transfer those insecurities to a writer. Thanks for tackling this subject.

When I open one of my stories up for voting and comments I do so WITHOUT RESERVATION. I do not edit the comments (by rejecting them from publication) nor scream foul if someone rates one of my (few) stories poorly. I accept all comments.

To me, writing is hard work, so my natural inclination is to immediately become defensive if someone criticizes my work. However, that reaction lasts less than a split second if the critique is really a flame. Flames get me laughing too hard to care. Conversely, a serious critique is the only one which merits my attention. Having someone point out mistakes I’ve made in story logic or grammar is heart wrenching, and I appreciate every single word of that commentator.

Being a lazy writer, I’ve critiqued more than my fair share of stories. I like to think that I only look at the content of the piece. To me, grammar and punctuation do matter. A poorly written story is a poorly written story, so I make no apologies for pointing that out. Failures in timelines and inconsistent motives and actions will likely draw an opinion too. If there is any consolation, it’s that I only comment on stuff that catches my interest.

I’m particularly fond of “Loving Wives” stories. That category seems to draw the most comments, and create the most controversy; and it also has the BEST storytellers. Those stories tend to be so compelling because so many readers can relate directly to the characters and their experiences. Having said that, I do avoid reading, voting, and commenting on stories where the author has prefaced a warning that the theme is cuckolding or the joy of adultery. I don’t care for that kind of story so my voting would be unfair in that situation. I also avoid BDSM tales too…just not my cup of tea.

I recently wrote a comment to a story in the “Romance” category because I could not relate to the outcome or to the motives of the main characters. In fact, I found not a single redeeming character in the entire tale. That got me blasted by someone who was upset that I ventured to comment on the story outside of “Loving Wives”. I would have responded except that I hate to see tit-for-tat banter between commentators in the Feedback section. I’ve engaged in that poor behavior once and thought afterward that that was the most disrespectful thing I could have done to the author.

Some authors on Lit have a following that is very defensive about any bad things being said about their work. I found that out by accident when I made a minor criticism on a story that I rated a 5. Someone forgot to notify me that only accolades were acceptable. Of course that kind of behavior goes against the very idea of an open Feedback process.

In my opinion, Feedback should be directed at the story…not the author and most certainly not at another commentator. It’s just bad form. It’s also bad form to personally attack an author because of what they’ve written …or to reprimand a commentator after you’ve solicited their opinion as the author.

Dear author, thank you for bringing this issue for a discussion. I believe that I can add an additional angel to this forum. I also hope that this angel is, and should remain rare.

The fact that there is not such a small percentage of intolerant non constructive feedback from readers is evident. Still, I want to defend it in the name of tolerance. To the most part it should be ignored. On certain cases it merits a reaction.

My personal real shocker though happened when I tried to do that within the framework of a feedback to one specific story. The bottom line - I have been removed off the feedback forum by the author. I certainly have not seen it coming. No, I never cursed or called the author by any name. Yes, I gave a reasoned review for each of the story’s three chapters. I even came with suggestions for each chapter. Parenthetically, I do not think that non-writers should always attach suggestions to their feedbacks. I also think that even saying ‘I loved it ‘or ‘I did not like it’ is a constructive feedback.

Yes, I was critical, especially regarding the last chapter which did not work for me. Most reviewers did like the story. Few reviewers were critical (especially of the third chapter).

Than came the “hate feedback” from other readers towards the dissenting minority. We were called any thing from Nazis to people who should not take the space (?) of others on the feedback forum. I responded to this hate feedback by sending a follow up feedback (not an unusual feature on Literotica’s feedback’s forum) by using humor; identifying the specific symptoms of the intolerant reactions and offering to debate any point in the story’s narrative on which I based my evaluation, as long as the debate would be to the merit.

Next thing I know, my last message, calling for tolerance and debate, was taken away by the author. Last time I checked the Nazi labels are still displayed there (I am not suggesting to take them off either).

This author‘s reaction heart me a great deal, especially since many of my family members were killed by the Nazis. A sad other side of the coin – I never meant to heart this author. I never disrespected him or called him by names. Yet, he allowed ‘Nazi’ labels to stay and removed my call for tolerance and debate.