Little Mistakes Ch. 2

It's midnight and the phone's going off in Lydia's apartment, waking her from a peaceful sleep. Her first year at college was really kicking her butt not to mention the part time job she was working. On the third ring she picked it up and knew it would be a bad omen.

"Lydia,"

"Dove?"

"Well its been a year almost, and we should be celebrating. However I shouldn't, three days ago, I forgot what color my blood was... Hell for all I knew it could have been purple. This is a recording if you haven't guessed yet (I was ever the dramatic one)." Lydia knew this wasn't good, the voice was Leah's. They were great friends, but hadn't seen each other in a long time, she also knew her friend was having a very hard time now a days.

"Everything after that party has been so messed up. You moved away for college (granted its only a thirty minute drive), we've grown apart, and I've been left here. My parents divorced, mom staid and I staid, she remarried, and I was molested. Like I said a lot has happened in just one year." Lydia knew about the divorce and the remarriage, but that was the first time she heard about the molestation, she almost dropped the phone when she heard those words.

"So to answer my question, my blood is still scarlet, I had to cut myself open to see that, you know to make sure. Lydia, I know I've told you this before but still, I love you (and yes I'm crying). You are the only person in this world that I love, everyone else can go to hell for all I care. I've been used, I'm worn out, and no good. Guess the only thing left for me to do is see if I can fly (this should be interesting). Again I love you Lids." The recorder clicked off the tape was over, Lydia angrily hung up the phone then speed dialed Leah's number, all she got was a busy signal. She already knew where the rest of the night would take her, she got out of bed and quickly searched for her clothes and keys, tonight's fun had just begun.

***

I couldn't take it anymore, hell I shouldn't have to take it anymore. Technically I was the queen of botched suicide, but not tonight. Shit I'm still shaking, its not right, he's gotten bolder, he waited tell she was peacefully asleep before he accosted me in my own goddamn room. My only sanctuary, I knew this was going to happen. I made sure I was never home alone with him, I thought I was safe. Safety now that's a joke, the word doesn't even exist. Afterward I ran into my bathroom to throw up then I dismantled my deposable razor and just had a field day with my arm. I went a little over board but hell I don't care. I know tonight will be the last night. No more. I was going to walk the two miles to the water tower that was in the middle of town and just jump off. I guess the reason why I called Lydia and left that message for her to hear (thank the goddess for pocket mic's), was to have at least one person try to stop me. I know she will try and probably succeed, that is if I don't jump before she shows up. Tonight this little dove is going to fly.

I ran to get to the water tower, out of breath (a bit out of shape), I climbed up the tower to the top, it is a long way down, and I hate heights. The wind was whipping my curly brown hair every which where. I climb over the railing my arms stretched out behind me and my hands white knuckled holding on the railing, all I have to do is let go and free fall. Trying to talk oneself into jumping isn't easy, especially with tears running down my checks and a sobbing type hiccup stuck deep in my chest. The world stopped, I don't know how long I stood there looking down on the trees and meadow below, I think my thoughts ran along the line of what a peaceful place to die. I can hear cars in the distance going to and fro, I even hear a car door slam, although I'm not paying attention.

"GODDAMN YOU!" I hear a scream, I almost let go of the railing out of surprise of the brake in silence. Lydia is at the bottom of the tower looking up at me, she still looked like a ruffled little angry kitten, even from up here. "Come down here right now!" She screams.

"At lest I still have my clothes on." I yell down at her trying to make a joke of the situation, I can tell by the way she looks it was wasted.

"I see it as you only have two ways to deal with this, either you come down, or I come up there and drag your ass back over the railing."

"I weigh too much, you're not strong enough, and we probably both will die if you try." I was right, I was too big for Lydia to drag over the railing. She was tall but probably only weighed 120lbs if not less, as where I weigh at lest 180 if not more, it would be physically impossible for her to even hope to drag me over the railing.

"You know the stories of a mother seeing her child trapped under the wheels of a car, and she is able to lift the car to get the child out. Fate has no boundaries, if the Goddess doesn't want to take you, she wont." Lydia started to climb up the latter of the water tower.

"Don't....I will jump if you start to come up here." I warn her, my voice shaking.

"No you wont...If you were going to jump you would've done it by now, and you wouldn't have called me. Now please, Dove, come down."

"I don't know if I can. Lydia you don't understand, its do and die, I wont go back home. I'll jump before that. Lids please don't make me go home." I pleaded with her, I was begging and sobbing.

"I promise, my little dove, I promise on my own life, under the moon and stairs, in front of the goddess's them selves...I wont make you go back home, just please come down. Leah you know how much I love you, you jump and you will be murdering more then one person, because I can guaranty you that I will be the next to jump." I brake down, slowly I crawl over the side and fall flat on my ass on the walk way. I gather up my knees and rock and sob. I can't move, I don't want to move, I want everything to go away. Lydia is on the walk way with in minutes she sits down next to me with her arm over my shoulders. I move down until my head rest in her motherly lap, she just strokes my hair and rocks me, she doesn't even waste the moment with words. We bond again that night, again with tears and with out word comprehendible to the naked ear. I feel her tears lightly hit the side of my face and mix with my own. We mix, our souls, our tears, our love, it all mixes.

"I really was going to jump." I mumble staring off into nothingness.

"Shh.... I know but its over now. You are a fighter, but you don't have to fight alone."

"Its my fault you know, its all my fault, everything." I start to sob a new. Lydia gently pulls my hair back away from my face and ear.

"Don't you ever say that!" Her voice is felled with passion. "Its not your fault! No matter what anyone says, no matter what you think, its not your fault."

"You don't even know what happened."

"I don't have to know, to know the just of it. It was your stepfather wasn't it?"

"Yes." My voice was barely audible. "Its my fault I didn't fight, or scream, I was just asking for it, I didn't even say no."

"Did you say yes?"

"No!"

"Then its not your fault. He took advantage of you, he knew you weren't going to scream or yell, he took advantage, he also knew you wouldn't tell your mom on him."

"What's the point she wouldn't believe me."

"Exactly. Its not your fault... He's scum, word escape me, I cant think of any horrible name that's horrible enough to call him. You're going to live with me from now on, if that's ok with you."

"Thank you Lids, I don't know what I would do with out you."

"Lets not think about that, little dove, you will get through this, I swear on my life he will never touch you again. I have a gun I keep near my bed and I will use it if he ever touches you again." Silently tears kept coming and Lydia just held me, we staid there all night and watched the sunrise together. This may not have a happy ending, but its better then just ending. I fell asleep before the sun came up. Before, though, I heard Lydia tell me how beautiful I was, and how much she loved me. I love her too, I just will never be able to put it in the right words. Gently she nudged me awake so I could watch the breath taking sunrise. We climbed down that water tower in the early morning light, both of us thanking and praying to our own goddess's.

We got into her car and drove for her place, we didn't really have a plan, once there she bandaged my arm up better then I had, and she gently kissed every scar old and new. I skipped school, and she skipped work. Together we ended up curled up in bed holding each other, it was beautiful, she was beautiful. I just hope it will last, we both will fight so I wont have to go back. Together I think we will win, I know she will never stop fighting for me. I'm her little dove after all.