Losing Control at the Lake Ch. 02

For the next week or so, we lay low. My mom had a few days off work and Derek came home, so the four of us spent quite a bit of time together, and it really wasn't all that awkward. It was almost like there were two Jaymes: the Jayme who treated me like a twelve-year-old and the Jayme who made me feel like a woman. But still, there were times when he'd get too close and I'd breathe in the smell of him and melt inside, or I'd brush up against him and he'd get this agonized look on his face, the heat in his eyes telling me that he'd like nothing more than to rip my clothes off and have his way with me. A couple of times we ran into each other in the hallway, and he'd grab me and kiss me and then release me, dazed and damp. But we kept up appearances for the family's sake, and we took no chances. Until the night that we were invited to the Hickman's house again, this time for a pool party.

I was in my room changing into my favorite black bikini when he tapped on my door. I called him in and he stepped inside and stopped in his tracks.

"Wow," he said in a strangled voice.

I stepped closer to him. "You like?" I asked coyly.

He nodded. "I like. And I bet Josh will like, too, that little fucker."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked.

He sighed. "Look..." he started, "there's something I need to tell you."

"What?" I looked at him expectantly, confused.

"About Josh."

"So tell me."

"Josh likes you. He wants to date you. He asks about you all the time."

"Really?" I wasn't sure what to do with this information, but I did know that had he told me this just a few weeks ago, I would've jumped at the chance to be with Josh. Only now, I couldn't because I was...my uncle and I were...what exactly were we doing? "And?"

"And... I guess I don't know how I feel about that. Or rather I do know how I feel about that. Because we agreed this can't go anywhere. We agreed we would just get it out of our systems. So I guess if you like Josh, maybe you should date him. And I'm telling you this because he's probably going to ask you tonight, and I just wanted you to be prepared, since I didn't mention it before."

I felt like he'd kicked me in the stomach. "I can't believe you," I said.

"What?"

"Are you trying to get rid of me?"

"No!" he insisted. "No, not at all. But you're young, you know? You shouldn't miss out on something just because of...just because we..." He stopped, then reminded me, "You were all over him at the party. And clearly he wasn't forcing you. There's something there, is all I'm saying. You like him, and he likes you. And maybe this...whatever it is...is just horniness on your part. And once you're with Josh, you won't worry about me because you'll be too busy with him."

I looked at him incredulously. "Do you believe that? You really think I'm just a horny little girl, you son of a bitch, and that if I just spread my legs for anyone I'll be satisfied? You think this is about sex?" I pushed him away, and he grabbed for me, but I slapped his hand.

"Don't touch me!" I cried. "I know what you're doing! You're trying to let me down easy! Well, it's bullshit."

I threw myself on the bed, sobbing angrily. He was beside me in an instant, stroking my hair, crooning softly in my ear. "No, Dana, no, babe, I promise, that's not it. I swear, baby, that's not it at all."

Just then, Derek knocked and called my name, and Jayme moved away from me as Derek cracked the door. I heard him and turned to him, my eyes red, my makeup smeared. Derek looked from me to Jayme and back to me, clearly confused.

"Boy troubles, man," Jayme said.

"Good luck with that," Derek muttered, and ducked back out.

I buried my face in the pillow again and shook with sobs. "I'm not a little girl," I cried into the pillow. "That's all you think I am."

"No, that's not it. Look at me," he begged.

I buried my face further into the pillow.

"Please."

Reluctantly I turned over and faced him. He looked at me like he was going to be sick. "Please don't cry," he said. "I'm sorry. Just don't cry." He rubbed my arms and planted light kisses on my forehead, my eyelids, the tip of my nose. I felt the anger fade as he kissed me so softly on the lips, and I reached for him, pulling him against me by the hips.

"If you only knew how long I've been watching you, waiting for you to grow up, you'd never say things like that to me," he whispered huskily. "I've been here summer after summer, watching you turn from a little girl into a beautiful woman, and hating myself for noticing you."

I searched his face, but all I saw there was honesty.

"Last summer," he continued, "you were still dating Ryan, remember?"

I nodded, and slid my fingers into his blond, shaggy curls.

"Do you remember Fourth of July? That red sundress you had on? With the tie straps?"

I couldn't believe he remembered an outfit from almost a year ago. I barely remembered it myself.

"We were at the fireworks, and he was standing behind you, rubbing your shoulders because it was a little breezy that night. And I was standing behind both of you, watching it happen, his hands on your bare shoulders, his fingers near those little red tie straps, and my stomach just tied in knots, I was suddenly so jealous. I swear, I thought my head would explode. It was like I wanted to kill him for touching you. No," he corrected himself, "for being able to touch you. For having the right to touch you, which I couldn't ever have. And all I could think about when you two left was him untying those little straps, and touching you, and kissing you. And I left that night and just drank myself silly. Do you remember how hungover I was the next day?"

I nodded.

" I can't tell you how many fantasies I've had about you in that red sundress." He sighed then. "And now, here I am touching you, which is almost worse. Because I still don't have the right to do it. And the reason I said that about Josh-"

I covered his mouth and turned my head away, but he pulled my hand off and continued, "The reason I said that about Josh is that I love you, and I want you to have something normal. Not some fucked-up, pervy uncle you can't be with, but a real guy you can be with. Like, in public."

"You are a real guy," I protested.

"No." He shook his head. "You know exactly what I'm talking about. Don't do that. I want you to be completely honest with me and with yourself."

"I am completely honest!" I cried.

"Then think about your mom and what she would say if she knew about this. Think about what Derek would say. Your dad. Your friends. You would lose the respect of everyone you know. And your dad, well, he'd probably kill me. He thinks I'm a drug addict, and I'm surprised he even lets me in his house. You think he wants me touching his little girl?"

I had no response to that. He was right.

"Look, this is all I'm saying: just keep your options open. Okay? Will you do that, for me?" I looked into those blue eyes and I knew I wouldn't say no. I would refuse him nothing.

He kissed me sweetly, his lips a promise.

"Yes, I will. For you," I breathed, my body heating up again just from his kiss. We kissed passionately on my bed until he pulled away from me, breath ragged, pressing his hard-on with the heel of his hand.

I shouldn't have giggled, but suddenly it was funny.

"You think this is funny?" He was laughing now, too. "My blue balls are funny to you, too, I suppose?"

I giggled even harder.

"Now I have to go take care of this," he said.

"Take care of it here," I replied softly, moving aside the cups of my bikini top and squeezing my arms together so that my breasts stood out proudly, my nipples standing at attention. I grinned at him and began caressing them, tweaking and pulling at my nipples.

"Are you serious? Oh, my God..." he groaned, but didn't need any more invitation. He started stroking his cock, his eyes never leaving my bare tits, breathing heavily within seconds. I stood up slowly, turned, and lowered my bikini bottom to show him my naked ass. And that was all it took. I heard him choke and grunt and he grabbed for my towel. I pulled my bathing suit back up and covered my chest and smiled at him sweetly. He was still breathing shallowly and wiping cum off himself.

"Not a little girl," I reminded him, pleased with myself. I had actually seduced him and made him cum just by showing him my body. I felt powerful and wanton. I stretched in front of the mirror and began fixing my hair. He watched me as he straightened his clothes, and then we collected Derek and headed to the party.

This party was much bigger, and I lost both Derek and Jayme in minutes. Careful about drinking too much after last time, I grabbed a water bottle and slipped out of the crowd to the edge of the yard.

Josh sidled up to me, a flower in his hand. "For you," he said, and tucked it behind my ear.

"Thank you," I said, smiling sweetly at him.

"I want to apologize for my behavior last time you were here," he said. "I wasn't exactly a gentleman. And I'm not sure your uncle Jayme was too happy with the way I pawed all over you, either."

I raised my eyebrow. "But he and...but your mom and him..."

He waved a dismissive hand. "That's her. She's a grown woman; she makes her own choices."

I shrugged and lowered my eyes. He tipped my chin up and kissed me. "I know it's hard to undo what we've already done, but do you think I could take you out sometime? I'd be a total gentleman, I swear." Then he laughed. "I mean, I realize I'm kissing you right now, which isn't exactly a ringing endorsement for my ability to be a gentleman..."

I giggled. "It's ok. I believe you. And yes, I would like that."

He made a quick victory pump of his fist, and then threw his arms around me and pulled me close to him in a big bear hug. "Thank you, thank you," he said. "I swear, we'll have a good time. How's tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow's good," I replied.

We spent the rest of the night chatting with one another. He introduced me to a few people, keeping his arm around me most of the evening. I have to admit that I loved being on his arm. I still had to keep reminding myself that it was real. Conversation between the two of us came easily, and he made me laugh. A few times he pulled me into a secluded corner and kissed me. He was an amazing kisser, really putting himself into it, kissing me slow and deep but also teasing me now and then by nipping my bottom lip between his teeth. By the time Jayme came around to walk me home, I was so hypersensitive that my skin hurt all over like I had a fever.

Jayme told me Derek had already left, and he exchanged a few words with Josh, whose hands never left me as he spoke to Jayme. He gave me a giant squeeze and whispered in my ear, "Bye, beautiful. See you soon." Then he kissed me on the side of my mouth and disappeared back into the crowd.

Jayme and I slipped out into the darkness. "So did he?" Jayme asked bitterly as we walked back down the path.

"Did he what?" I replied, not looking at him.

"Did he try to fuck you?"

"No, as a matter of fact he did not try to fuck me. As a matter of fact, he was a perfect gentleman."

He snorted. "I don't believe that."

"Believe it or don't. He was."

"And?"

"And what?"

"And are you going out with him?"

I was reluctant to answer that, but I knew it was going to come up at some point. I'd been waiting for it. And now, here it was. "Yeah," I said carefully. "Tomorrow night."

We turned the corner around the side of the boathouse, and then he shoved me up against the side of the building, the rough shingles scraping my back, and assaulted my mouth with his. There was nothing gentle about this kiss, and I knew why. He pretended the whole time that he wasn't paying attention, but I knew he knew exactly what I'd done with Josh every moment of the evening. He'd watched every touch, every time Josh whispered in my ear or brushed my hair back or stroked my arm. Just as I had seethed in a jealous rage every time Jayme had turned his attentions to Alicia. And now here we were, making up for a night of torment, just the two of us.

When he broke the kiss to bite my neck I gasped. "I've wanted this all night," I moaned.

"I could tell the way you were camped out under Josh's nutsack," he snapped, pulling my tank top down and springing my breasts free from their push-up bra. He mauled my tits, squeezing them roughly, biting at my nipples, burying his face in my creamy flesh.

"No, I did want you...I do want you...You're the one who wanted it this way. You know I just want you."

"Show me, then," he demanded, pushing me to my knees. Eagerly I opened my mouth so he could feed me his cock, which had been straining against his zipper ever since he pushed me up against the wall. The silken, swollen head pushed past my lips, and I took him deep inside my mouth, pushing my tongue against the underside of the shaft the way he loved so much, reaching up with my fingers to lightly caress his balls with my fingertips. He grunted as I worked him back and forth, grasping the base of his cock with one hand as I licked and sucked the head. In moments he was straining against me.

"Oh, God," he panted, his head thrown back, "Oh, God, Babe, just like that. Oh, fuck, that feels incredible." And then suddenly he pulled from me, grasping his own cock, stroking it furiously with one hand while his other hand twined in my hair. "I'm gonna...cum..." he wheezed, his mouth open, his eyes wide and dark.

"On my tits," I begged, and he growled and pointed his cock at me, shooting rope after rope of hot, creamy semen all over my neck, my nipples, my collarbone. I felt his hot seed dripping down between my tits. I dipped my face down and the last splash caught me on my upper lip, and I sighed and licked his cum off my mouth and smeared it over my chest with my fingers.

He closed his eyes and panted, releasing me and leaning up against the building beside me. I climbed off my knees and pressed myself against him, and we kissed wordlessly. He squeezed me so tightly that I almost couldn't breathe.

"I can't stay away from you," he murmured against my hair. "Please don't make me do it. Please don't leave me for Josh."

"I won't," I swore, "I'll never leave you for Josh. It's not like this with him. I swear. It's nothing like this with him, and it's never been like this with anyone. Only you. Only ever with you." And I covered his face with kisses and he laughed and pulled me to him and we kissed long and sweet behind the Hickman's boathouse, his cum drying on my bare chest, both making promises to the other that we knew we couldn't keep.

I had a great time with Josh at the zoo, and he was the perfect gentleman the entire time, holding my hand and touching me lightly now and then on the shoulder or back but never groping or pushing too far. A couple times he kissed me on the lips, just a sweet, light kiss, and I was surprised at how much I enjoyed it. I thought my feelings for Jayme would keep me from feeling anything for Josh, but I was wrong. The truth is, though I loved Jayme, I was starting to fall for Josh as well.

After the zoo, we grabbed pizza and headed back to his house to watch a movie. But after spending the day together in a state of attraction, the tension was too much and we stopped watching the film. We were in his media room, stretched out on the double chaise, and his kisses were making me crazy. I wanted to rip his clothes off, but I was too afraid to be forward, so I let Josh take the lead.

He moved out on top of me, his forearms propping him up on both side of my face, his body covering me. He kissed me slowly, his mouth exploring mine, sucking my tongue and nipping my bottom lip. I moaned against him as he found a spot on my neck that drove me crazy and nibbled it for what seemed like hours. "I really like you, Dana," he whispered.

"I like you, too," I whispered back.

"And I really want you. But I know you probably want to take it slow. I just want you to know it's ok. I mean, I want you so badly. But I'm willing to wait, if that's what you want. Just putting that out there."

He was so amazing. "Thank you," I murmured against his chest, breathing in the smell of him that I loved so much. "We should take it slow," I agreed. "really get to know each other."

He smiled at me and kissed me. "Exactly," he said, and then rolled off of me, leaving me craving the feeling of his lean body on top of mine.

We watched the rest of the movie snuggled together, his arms around me. Every now and then he kissed my ear or my neck, but for the most part he barely touched me. And I was on fire.

When the movie was over, we lay on the double chaise, fully clothed, just kissing at first."So how many guys have you been with?" Josh whispered between soft kisses, stroking my hip.

"Just one," I said. "Just my old boyfriend."

"Oh yeah, that Ryan kid." He chuckled. "No disrespect, but that kid couldn't have been too amazing in bed."

I felt the need to defend Ryan, who had always been good to me. "We loved each other, and it was sweet," I said.

"That's cool," he apologized. "I guess I'm just jealous."

"Jealous?" I asked. "Jealous of what?"

He looked into my eyes and ran his finger across my lower lip. "I just wish I was the first person to touch you," he said. "It's stupid, I know." He buried his face in my neck and whispered against my skin. "Dana, you're so different from anyone else I've ever been with. You're so sweet and so innocent."

I forced a light laugh. "Josh, I'm not that innocent."

"But you are, he insisted. "Do you know how many eighteen-year-old girls I know who are practically virgins? None."

"But Josh..."

"Practically a virgin," he repeated, his lips seeking mine out again. "And all mine." He kissed me all over my face, rained gentle kisses down my neck and across my chest. He pushed up my tank top and nuzzled my stomach and up my torso.

When he got to my bra, he looked up at me expectantly and I nodded slowly. Carefully, he pushed my tank top up and peeled the bra straps back, exposing my breasts to his exploring tongue. He kissed them for what seemed like hours, rubbing his face across the hollow between them, nuzzling the nipples without actually sucking them, until I was crazy with lust. I held my breath, trying not to moan, for what would that do to his pristine image of me? How many "practically virgin" girls were so sensitive, so conditioned, that they could cum just from having a guy play with their tits? But it was building. I felt the slow boil at the core of me as he moved to my nipples, licking them now, flicking them with his tongue, enclosing them in his warm, wet mouth and suckling them.

I breathed shallowly, almost panting but not quite. "Does that feel good?" he asked, moving his hand to my belly, spanning his fingers across my navel as he continued to take each nipple in turn between his teeth, nibbling and suckling. Slowly his fingers traveled down my stomach, until they were just inside the waistband of my shorts, and then he stopped and looked at me. "I don't want to do anything that you don't like."

"I like it," I whispered, closing my eyes to enjoy the sensation of Josh exploring my body. He was so different than Jayme. Jayme knew what I wanted, sometimes when I didn't even know myself. He pushed me to open up to things I never thought I'd do, whereas Josh checked with me every step of the way, not wanting to push me, never wanting to hurt me.

Without stopping, Josh unzipped my shorts and slid them down my legs. I kept my eyes squeezed shut as he slid them inch by inch down my tan legs, drawing them carefully over my bare feet and tossing them on the chair.

But I was watching again as he slid his fingers into the waistband of my panties, brushing through my pubic hair with just the tips of his fingers. I stifled a moan as his fingers edged down further, touching wet curls.