Me, Tina, Maggie and Lillian

This happened a little over ten years ago when I was in my mid twenties, so I apologize if I romanticized the memory of this great sexual experience. I pulled a Lord Byron for the first couple of paragraphs...

After some shots of ripple,
I began to flick her nipple.
I started to kiss her,
As she let out a soft whisper,
With a timid giggle,
She said she wanted to "Sha-booja-biggle my ba-hooky-shiggle."

Our bodies became one as our hands gracefully caressed each other while our passion carried us to the bedroom. We were bumping into walls and knocking over lamps while our tongues celebrated and danced. Guided by the instinct of love we had for each other our tongues danced the beautiful "macarina" as our spirits danced "the funky chicken". We knew the passionate lovemaking that we were about to partake in was going to be like a young JJ Jimmy Walker from the television show "Good Times" blindfolded and naked walking into a Nazi Mosh Pit with a blonde bombshell in his arms.

To the bedroom...

With all force and passion,
At the moment she was giddy,
I said I wanted to "Fa-coocoo-bitty her poe-stinky-jibby."

Tina had a red and yellow-stained string hanging out of her swollen love nest. I yanked out the bloody whip, wildly slung it around over my head like a cowboy in a rodeo, and began spanking Maggie all over the back of her neck with it while feverishly pinching her butt.

Lillian was a little older than the three of us. She was 76. Or so she said. Since Lillian's tits were socks with rocks, instead of tit fucking, I turkey-necked her. Her neck began flaking like a level 5 blizzard, like Edward ScissorHands carving that ice statue. "Tight Lil" began a phlegm induced quacking sound that started to choke her. So I punched her in the back and a brownish green bloody wad shot out of her mouth making a natural lube - she sounded just like Burgess Meredith as the Penguin in the old Batman TV shows. She was so hot; I lost it, and I busted my first nut all over Lillian. We mixed in her dandruff skinflakes, made snowballs and built a snowman with a perfect gray mustache standing over her pube-plucked tuna and named the snowman "Cortez, The Conquistador". I playfully threw one of the snowballs at Maggie. It missed and hit Lillian in the chest. The impact made a loud snapping sound in Lillian's chest. Just then, Tina stared up at the east sky posing like a Greek Goddess Statue and with an angelic vibrato broke out with a glorious rendition of "Chestnuts Roasting on an open fire..." Lillian started quacking over and over again like a broken record when an uncontrollable laughter possessed me and I started laughing like the Riddler. The three us in the heat of the moment: "Tight Lil" quacking like The Penguin, myself uncontrollably laughing like the Riddler, and Tina singing "Chestnuts Roasting", overwhelmed Maggie to the point that Maggie's stomach began convulsing. Maggie's eruption began squirting like a lawn sprinkler on the Fourth of July.

I took a moment to take in the experience: My pious rod enchanting itself amongst three unshaven rancheros was like a Jewish folklore hunter at a Mexican Rodeo...Barbacoa!!!

Then the alcohol kicked in and things got even hotter...

Tina was next. My tongue began to pummel that shimmering clit faster than Rocky Marciano working the bag. Since I have a paralyzed clef lip hanging and uncontrollably swaying from side to side over the gap between my two front teeth, I sucked that clit through and fro the corridors of Hell's Gate. I named that move, "The Jackie Gleason". Ignoring another loud snap in Lillian's ankle, I jammed Lillian's big toe up Tina's ass and then made her bite off her toenail and scratch Maggie's right nipple with it. I coined that maneuver, "The Staunch Republican". In the middle of all the heat, we are not sure whom, but someone accidentally knocked Lillian's eyeball out of socket. We were so into it, we didn't even notice anything had happened to Lillian until I slung Tina's head through the sheetrock wall and Tina noticed an eyeball slowly sliding down the side of the headboard. She didn't know it was an eyeball and was about to use it as a butt-bead. After flicking the eyeball away, we noticed Lillian was missing. Then Maggie heard a faint muffled repetitious quacking coming from under the bed. Maggie got jealous, claiming Lillian was always doing something to get attention. We yanked Lillian back on aboard and that's when I found UTOPIA.

Maggie bent over and a prime glistening ripe zit on her ass cheek with one fat 10-inch kinky red hair rising out of the summit turned me on so much I had to look away for fear I would blow my wad in orgasmic nirvana all over it. It was like a whole other woman was in the room, an exotic Irish whore. I blindly reached out and wrapped that ten-inch kinker around my index finger and yanked as fast and as hard as possible. It was like pulling the string to a top on the deck of the Titanic seconds before the abominable went down. To my surprise, I lifted Tina right off the bed. Using the chainsaw method, I yanked a second time and the zit exploded like the ejaculate of 39-year-old virgin who was born without arms. Blood and puss was raining everywhere. I then turned to Lil and Tina, raised my arms high in the air, and did my best Richard Nixon impression.

After we finished and confirmed Lillian was still breathing, I yanked the soggy tampon off the wall, walked down to the bar, tossed the yellowish red stained bag onto the bar and told the bartender to fix me up a bloody mary. I began to get a bellyache so I went to take a shit. Ahhh my youth... Good times!