My Depravity

Disclaimer: Everything written is my own experience. I will be altering the names of the people to protect their privacy.

I suppose I have to start somewhere. I wanted to write this down because I wanted a place to vent. Where better than here, where no one knows me.

A little bit about me. I'm 35 this year, and I have a son that's 19. I have been divorced since my son was 5, and have been raising him as a single mother ever since. But I am still susceptible to my sexual urges. Probably due to my age, it gets more prevalent with every passing year.

I have fallen into sin many times and I can't help it. My body heats up, and I need to be satiated. Recently, I had a torrid little affair with an intern 16 years my junior. He was quite charming when he first came in, so I mentored him a bit. A few dinners later, I was bouncing on his cock, milking him for everything he had. My loins ached to be pounded, and he was young and eager. He was enthusiastic about everything my body had to offer. His constant need to taste me and my need to be ravished suited well with each other. I would always go home bruised and aching, cum dripping down my panties. I would rarely shower after my meetups, as I had to prepare food for my family, so I usually rushed home. And we usually never had condoms on hand.

I would always feel guilty after our meetups though. My son would run to me and give me a little hug, squealing "HI MOMMY" every time I'd come home. Since it was mostly just us, we were quite close. He would put his arms around my shoulders, my body slick with sweat, saliva, and ask about what's for dinner. I'd smile with tightened lips, hoping he wouldn't realize what a horrible person I was. It was weak of me to fall prey to my baser instincts. But deep down, it was animalistic instincts that drove me, and I find it hard to suppress myself. I would greet my elderly father, my heartbeat pounding, hoping he wouldn't recognize any telltale signs on his unfilial daughter. He usually wouldn't. Bad eyesight due to old age and early-onset dementia was unusually helpful in this regard.

As the days progressed, things would escalate. He would skype me to head to the handicapped toilet during work, where I usually gave him a blowjob to start the day off. An irritating habit he had, was to cum on my face and hair. It usually ruined my makeup and I had to spend an extensive amount of time cleaning myself. After the first few times, I simply stopped wearing makeup to work and wore it when I'm in the office, after sucking dick. While it helped improved matters, the intern simply laughed it off. I supposed it was some sort of fetish for him. While annoying, it was a bit hot after the deed was done, and returning to the office and looking around to see if my colleagues suspected anything.

No one ever really did. Although my new routine was remarked upon, and I usually waved it off by saying it's a new skin routine. The glow of my face helped to sell the lie. The cum coating my mouth told a different story. But then he wanted full-out fuck sessions in the toilet. I had to fend him off as it was a public office and enjoying sex isn't a good enough reason to be fired. So he suggested my house. I hesitantly agreed as I couldn't think of an alternative. Going to a motel once in a while was fine, but it was risky and I could be easily spotted. My house made a good excuse to do overtime anyway. But my biggest issue was my family.

Was it worth it? To risk my reputation and dignity? For sex? Logic said no. My loins disagreed. And he was persuasive.......

So I said yes. What else was I supposed to do? But it would make things convenient.... and I could satisfy my needs too. It all seemed too easy and doable. Which was my fear too...

But I wanted to be physically satisfied. Was it so wrong to want to feel warm? To know the intimacy of a man?

If it was wrong, then I don't think I wanted to be right.

So I allowed the Intern to come home with me. He would be polite to my father and playfully pat my boy's arm.

Then he would fuck me two ways to Sunday. My room was locked to prevent unwanted entry and my ass was his for the evening.

His long hard shaft pushing in my slit and pulling out, my breasts eagerly presented to him. He would eagerly suck my nipples, coating them with saliva, trying his best to draw something out. But I had no milk to give.

Not yet anyway.

He would violently turn me over so he could get easier access to my pussy. Must be all that porn he was watching. It seemed he wanted to be rough, just like all the videos he watched. And I was too much of a submissive to ask him to stop. He was much younger, but also fitter and stockier. It seemed fitting that he took me as he wished. So he did.

A routine developed. He would come to my house at least twice a week, as he didn't want his parents to suspect anything untoward was happening. He was still their child after all, and in Hong Kong, it was best that rumors not leak of anything that could tarnish a reputation. With all the times we had sex without a condom, I was honestly surprised that I didn't get pregnant. But I stocked up on Plan B pills as soon as our first session ended. Just to make sure. I would pray daily that it worked.

My little Intern made use of me like a doll, only for his pleasure. And when his internship ended, he left without even a goodbye. The only evidence of his arrival was the amount of Sperm leaking out of me, as a way of marking his territory. When I reached him, my son asked me about the whereabouts of his friend that would joke and play with him. And my father joined in to enquire on the polite young man that would always ask how he was.

All I could do was smile and reply that his time to work at my company had ended, my face slathered in cum, rubbed in like a mask. My pussy leaking more cum than usual.

I was a disgrace of a Daughter. And a Mother. And this was only the tip of the iceberg.

Please be kind. I poured my heart out today.