Nancy Porter's Journal: Endgame

The end of Nancy's Journal. Nancy returns to the Professor's house at Monica's request.

There is a rather graphic moment here, so please take that into account before continuing. Also, if you haven't read the first ten chapters nothing here will make any sense. Thanks to the folks who have stuck with this for better or worse.

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1. Knock knock

I managed to smile when the door swung open and I saw Monica, but the smile disappeared when I looked at her face. Her left eye was swollen and purple, and she looked like I felt.

"What happened to your face?" I asked Monica as she let me in after first giving a look around the front of the house.

Monica held her finger up to her lips and motioned me to follow her. We went up to her bedroom, where she closed the door behind us. Back where it all started, I thought to myself as I looked around the room, trying to find the camera location.

"I disconnected it," Monica said as she grabbed me and hugged me, kissing me like there was no tomorrow.

I felt her tears trickle onto my cheek as she kissed me, and I broke away terrified.

"What's wrong?" I pleaded with her, as it looked like she was on the verge of melting down right in front of my eyes.

"I'm so very sorry... sorry!" Monica cried, and broke down in my arms.

I held her in my arms until she managed to gain control of herself, and then sat down with her on the bed.

"Nancy, you have to listen to me and promise to do what I tell you," she said sternly.

"No," I said bluntly. "For one thing, you are really freaking me out, and two, I'm done taking orders around here."

"Good" Monica said. "That's what I want you to do. Leave here and never come back, no matter what."

"Okay, then tell me what's been going on here, and what happened to your eye."

"I'm going to tell you everything Nancy", she said softly. "You are going to hate me after I do, but not as much as I hate myself already.

2. Monica speaks

"First of all, right about now I'm supposed to be talking you into coming over here again tonight," Monica said. "He's fully expecting me to be able to do that."

"He actually thinks that?"

"Yes, if I asked you to, he knows you would," Monica said.

I looked at Monica and realized that the Professor was probably right, the asshole.

"Why does he want me over here tonight so badly?"

"It doesn't matter, you aren't going to come over. Especially when I explain everything to you."

"Well, I'm listening."

"I have to explain everything to you, right from the very beginning," Monica said as she put her moist and trembling hand onto mine. "That includes my part in this whole mess. How we managed to seduce you right from the start."

"Well, I know how that happened," I told her. "It just seems like a whole lot of trouble to go through to blackmail someone into doing all these weird things, just so a kinky old fart can masturbate in the back of the room."

"You think you understand, but I wish that was all there was to it," Monica said. "You weren't the first, and if it's up to Richard you won't be the last. You'll be my last though," Monica sniffed while grabbing more tissues. "I just can't do this anymore, no matter what he ..."

"I'm not the first girl he's done this to?"

"No, there have been several others, like Annie for instance, but you were the easiest to lure into it," Monica said. "He sets out to find the most naive girls he could find. Girls who were loners, or with few friends. Girls with no confidence or self-esteem."

"That's me," I admitted glumly. "Why not find girls that have done all the things you have me do already? I'm probably the last virgin in town, and I'm not close to being good looking."

"You are pretty, Nancy" Monica snapped. "That was part of what made it all so easy. You were a cute girl who looked in the mirror and saw only flaws, while everybody else looks at you much differently. Problem is, you put up this wall between you and the rest of the world, so nobody gets close enough to tell you."

"Okay, so you got me."

"It was Richard's job to entice you into coming over here, and after that it was up to me. I could sense your curiosity, and your loneliness, but that doesn't always add up to someone willing to let it continue. Once we saw the way you looked at me that first night, the rest was easy."

"So you watched the tape of me checking you out, and you left that book of those pictures out where I could see them?" I guessed.

"Right. We expected you to look, but when we saw you doing what you did, well, that allowed him to set you up. When you came that third time and saw yourself on film, and didn't walk out the door, that was it."

"I didn't have much choice, as you might recall" I reminded Monica. "Those copies of your little home movies going out to everyone I knew was a little incentive to cooperate."

"Blank tapes" Monica said. "No way Richard would ever attract attention to this operation of his by doing that. "All he did was use a private detective to find out things about you, and get the names and addresses of relatives and the others."

"So if I walked out that night and never came back, that would have been the end of it?"

"Yes. Most have."

"Most?" I asked. "How the hell many people have you done this to?"

"Who's counting?" Monica said. "Most leave. Sometimes the way it gets set up doesn't make it a tough choice for the girls. Many have been a little more world-wise than you. A couple have stayed like you have, but none of them has ever been as great as you."

"What's so frigging great about me?"

"You're fresh and natural" Monica said. "You just can't find girls to act as innocent as you do. You're totally refreshing, and just what a whole lot of people are looking for these days."

"What, you mean these people that you've had me playing your perverted games with around here every week? All this for them?"

"Do you have any idea who you are?" Monica asked me.

"I'm a homely nineteen year old girl with a ripped up asshole who's been getting blackmailed for months by a perverted professor" I spat out. "How close am I?"

"You're a multi-million dollar cash machine Nancy" Monica said. "You're the fantasy of tens of thousands of men and more than a few women."

"Oh yeah, I'm America's Sweetheart alright!"

Monica took my hand and brought me over to a computer station in the corner of the room, turning on the light and switched on the computer. I stared at the screen until the desktop appeared.

"Google yourself" Monica said. "Google... Yahoo... whatever you prefer."

"Fine" I said and typed in Nancy Porter.

"No" Monica said coldly. "Try again. Type in Molly."

"What?" I asked in confusion, spinning around to face Monica.

"M-O-L-L-Y" Monica said as the tears rolled down her face.

I was shaking as I typed what she asked.

3. Hi! My name is Molly!

Results 1-10 of about 9,100,000

That was the first thing I remember reading, and my eyes went to the first listing, and clicked.

Hi! My name is Molly!

There were other listings, but I clicked on the top one. The computer hesitated for a second, and then the screen exploded with a splash of color. A goofy looking girl, wearing a stupid plaid skirt and a plain blouse, looking petrified. In the background, a blackboard with Molly written in juvenile handwriting.

Hi! My name is Molly!

I'm young and innocent, and I have a lot to learn. The best thing is that YOU can watch me while I get lessons from people like YOU!

On the bottom of the screen, a warning saying you must be an adult to enter.

"Go ahead" Monica said still sobbing.

My hand was shaking so bad I had trouble controlling the mouse. Monica put her hand over mine and clicked the enter button.

There I was again, only now I was naked. Thankfully it was all blurry in the private parts below my neck, but I had no idea what I was doing on this website. I sat shaking my head in a daze, not comprehending any of this. Monica clicked on top of the screen and typed something in a box labeled 'members', which brought up a menu of some kind.

"What is all of this, Monica?" I askedwhile my head continued to spin. "I don't understand."

"Click onto anything in the list."

There was a list of a bunch of things that looked like movie titles. The top one was "Molly is Curious". I clicked on it and watched a little clock hand turn slowly before a movie screen appeared. There it was again. Me helping Monica undo her dress. Me almost drooling on her. Next me on the couch playing with myself while looking at the pictures of Monica.

I had already goten a big screen showing of these films, but somehow looking at them on the computer screen was very different. It finally hit me that it wasn't just me looking at this, it was the world.

The thing finally ended, but the menu screen came back up. "Molly Gets Shaved" was next, and There I was laying on the bed while Monica shaved my legs, armpits, and crotch that first night.

What did I do while this was going on in front of me? Nothing. I'm sure I must have been in shock, because there was no crying, vomiting or drama on my part. Just me, clicking on these various titles and watching my life going down the drain. Me and Pam. Me and Bev. Me and the old couple Walter and Kay. Every one of my little adventures captured on film, and only a click away.

I roamed around the site a bit, seeing myself in various poses, and supposedly inviting everybody to share my special adventures with me. My head was spinning, and I could not understand much of what I was seeing.

"Why?"

"It's reality television taken to the extreme" Monica said. "It's all you see on regular televison these days, so they figured that getting someone captured on film without them noticing would interest some people. They wildly underestimated exactly how many would be willing to pay for it."

"Pay? People pay to watch this stuff?"

"Through the nose, Nancy" Monica said as she took the mouse and navigated to another screen, where a menu listed what you could see and how much it would cost them.

$39.95 a month to join Molly's clubhouse, with a backward 's' no less. Private conversations with Molly every Tuesday night. DVD's with bonus footage. Molly merchandise, like a mouse pad with a picture of me in my goofy school uniform.

"Conversations? I never talk to anyone on Tuesday night or any other night?"

"They have some girl that sounds a little like you that talks to people" Monica said. "Not a very good imitation either, but the guys are too busy jerking off to care much."

"DVD's?"

Monica walked over to the closet and rummaged around a little before coming out with a handful of DVD's. Monica set them in a pile next to me, all of them with professional looking packaging, and all with my picture on the cover.

"Molly and the Bodybuilder", with little pictures of Bev and myself doing what we did. "Molly does Grandpa and his Grandson" with me and that stuttering kid, and little pictures of kindly old grandpa sticking it in my butt. "Molly Meets The Master", with the Professor in his mask sticking his salami in my mouth, and me without a mask of course. "Molly's First Lesbian Experience" with Pam going down on me. "Molly's a Squirter" with me strung up on that rack with the old couple.

"Molly Goes to the Potty?" I said, picking up the bottom one of the pile, featuring me sitting on the crapper with a bored look on my face.

"Something for everyone" Monica said sadly. "Everyone with 40 dollars, that is."

"How... where... the cameras?"

"They're everywhere" Monica said. "Bathrooms too, as you can see. Three cameras in the studio that you ended up in each night, so each show has multiple angles. It's not incredibly professional looking, but that's what the charm of it is. It's like watching the girl next door growing up, peeking through her bedroom window and sharing her experiences with her."

"I'm ugly and flat-chested. What kind of pervert would want to see me?" I asked in complete honesty.

"You are not ugly, Nancy" Monica scolded me. "A lot of guys like small breasted women, and a lot of people are sick of watching pornography with women filled with silicone pretending they're having fun, or faking getting off. You aren't acting, that's for sure, and it comes across that way on the films. There's also the fact that you don't look nineteen either. Even though people know that you are over eighteen, you look much younger and they are free to imagine anything they want."

"That's the reason I got shaved I guess" I muttered. "Why aren't you in these things? I can see why people would pay to see you."

"I've been in plenty of them, but my time is past" Monica said. "Besides, the silicone look is out."

"You... they, aren't real?" I asked while looking at Monica's magnificent bosom.

"God no" Monica said. "I've had three boob jobs, each one making me bigger than before. Nothing is real on me, Nancy. Tits, ass, teeth. All bought by the Professor."

"What does he get out all this?" I asked.

"Rich" Monica suggested. "Look at all this? Do you think we could live like this on a teacher's salary? Richard does real well with this racket, but he probably gets peanuts compared to the people who really run the show."

"There are others?"

"Of course! It's a gigantic corporation of some kind that's based in some other country. All he does it find the talent and do all the arrangements. They pay for the cameras and everything else."

"Those people were actors that I was with?"

"Some were, like 'Thugg'. Pam was a hooker that I knew from the old days who can use the dough. Most of the others were just members of his little club that love to be on film."

"Bev and the others are in a club with the Professor? What is it, some sort of perverts group?"

"In a way" Monica sighed. "A bunch of rich people that get together frequently and watch people have crazy sex. Rough sex, and inimaginable things go on there. It's where I was taken every Friday while you were over here supposedly dog sitting. No consolation to you, I'm sure, but what you've been doing is tame compared to that place and the things I've had to do."

"Have to do? Bullshit!" I spat out. "You're his wife, not his slave!"

"We aren't married" Monica said sadly, while a tear trickled down her face. "It's just an arrangement that helps put on the respectable front that he needs to keep this going. Besides, men don't usually marry their whores."

I sat with an even dumber than normal expression on my face while I tried to absorb all this.

"That's how I got involved with Richard to begin with years ago. He was a just a john who took a liking to me, and I was one of the few that were willing to try and satify him, given the size of his cock and all. He took good care of me at the start, sent me to rehab to get cleaned up from the drug problem I had, and got me cosmetic surgery to mold me into exactly what he wanted."

"I was grateful, so grateful that I would do anything he asked, no matter how strange it became. Believe me, it got strange. Things you couldn't conceive a woman doing, I did. Illegal things too. All captured on tape" Monica said sobbing a little.

"So, I was stuck. Blackmailed much like you were, and forced to help him with this operation. My choice was to do it and live the life I had grown accustomed to, or get thrown into jail. I had a few warrants that I had been dodging in addition to the stuff he had me do, so I made my choice, obviously."

"And I have to live with it" I added.

"Not any longer" Monica said. "That's why I'm telling you this, so you can leave here and never come back."

"What about you?" I asked, for some reason still caring about her after everything I had just heard.

"I'll deal with it, don't worry about me."

"He's responsible for your eye?" I asked.

"When it all went bad for you a couple of weeks ago I tried to have Richard stop it. You scene was supposed to be a little rough, but things got way out of hand, and I couldn't stand to see you being hurt. He punched me so that I wouldn't end up ruining the episode. It was my fault for getting you so drugged up to begin with, but I was hoping you would be so numb that you wouldn't even remember it."

"Drugged?" I said dumbly.

"Nothing really bad, just a very mellow mood relaxer" Monica said. "Something I was slipping you from the beginning."

I remembered the funny tasting water, and felt like an even bigger fool than ever.

"Anyway, that disaster with Thugg was the end of the line for you" Monica said. "That didn't go over well at all, and I can't believe that they even put it up on the site at all. They took it down real fast, but the reaction was incredibly negative. People were canceling their memberships, and actually complaining about you being hurt like you were part of their family" Monica said.

"As sick as it sounds, there are thousands of men out there who are madly in love with you. They want to marry you, to adopt you, as well as do everything else to you that you can imagine. The one thing they did NOT want was to see their little Molly being hurt, because once again, they could tell that it was no act. Richard got his ass chewed for that misstep, even though the assholes above him approved it, supposedly because they were desperate for material. So it was decided that 'Molly' had run her course. They had gotten a good run out of her, but it was time to end it. Besides, it can run forever on the website. What's that they say, if you haven't seen it before, it's new to you? So tonight he was planning a finale of sorts."

"What else can he do to me?"

"What's the one thing you've got left, Nancy?

"Ohhhh no! No fucking way!" I screamed. "There's no way I would let that happen, having some guy come in here and screw me!"

"I know that, and he knows too" Monica said. "That's why I'm supposed to get you here and really get you smashed out of you mind so you don't know what hit you. Only, it's not just anybody that would be doing it to you. He plans on doing that himself."

The thought of the Professor sticking, or trying to stick that huge thing of his into me made my skin crawl. As close as I had come to giving in to Greg at Stowe, the fact was that I was saving myself and I had managed to hold on this long said it meant something to me.

"So he's planning on being my first?" I asked. "Then what?"

"He figures you would never come back here after that" Monica said. "If for some reason you did, they would probably spin off another website where you'd be doing everything the really successful girls do on their way down; gang bangs, interracial, bondage and extreme fetish stuff. I doubt if he thinks you would go that route though."

I stood up and looked at Monica, who rose along with me.

"Seven o'clock?" I asked her, and the look of horror on her face was scary.

"No Nancy, You can't!" Monica wailed. "No!"

"It had to come sometime" I noted.

"He'll hurt you... bad!" Monica pleaded. "He still hurts me after all these years, and you he'll tear you up. Besides, your first time should be with someone special."

"I guess it will be" I said and moved out the bedroom door with Monica on my heels, trying to change my mind every step of the way.

"One thing though, Monica" I told her as strongly as I could. "No drugs! I want to be able to remember this. Do you understand what I am saying, Monica? Pretend you drugged me, and I'll act the part. About time to find out if I can act after all this anyway, huh?"

"Nancy..." Monica whined as I began to turn away.

"You tell him you talked me into it. Seven o'clock, and no drugs! You owe me that much" I told her as I turned again to go.

"One more thing" I said, and as I reached the door I spun around and slapped her in the face as hard as I could, while I finally broke down myself.