Nature or Nurture Ch. 16

The next day, and probably none too early after their nightly excursion, Victor wakes up confusedly. He has had really vivid dreams, but he can only remember some colourful impressions of places he has never actually seen himself.

A bustling city, sprawling with dark skinned people in colourful flowing robes, and market stalls overloaded with exotic fruits. A temple, overgrown with a lush green forest, with noisy, long limbed creatures with flowing tails jumping through them. Weird.

As he slowly comes out of the fantastic world of his dream, he remembers where he really is, and what has happened last night. His senses register that the room is still totally dark, even though it must be full day outside.

And his wakening senses also register that he is not alone in his improvised bed.

He can feel something pressing against his back, and he feels an arm around his shoulder. Very carefully, he turns around, seeing if what he thinks has happened is indeed true. Snuggled up really close to him, he finds Mina, fast asleep in the comatose state of her kind when the sun is in the sky.

How did she wake up to sneak in beside him? She should have been comatose from the moment she went to sleep last night!

Suddenly he realizes there is an even more profound question: Why would she wánt to sneak in bed with him? He feels....elated. There is no other way to describe his feeling at realizing she must have woken somewhere before dawn set in, and then chose to seek comfort with him. With him, Victor Frankenstein, who until a year ago had only had close contact with dead people. With a knife.

Then he remembers that technically, the woman lying next to him is dead. The irony makes him laugh, but Mina doesn't react. Clearly she's comatose now, even if she apparently wasn't yesterday. She doesn't feel as cold to the touch either, she is probably warm from his own body heat. Maybe that is what she sought in his bed, just a little bodily warmth to heat up her cold blood.

But something in him knows that isn't true, he knows she came to him as a human, as a person she trusts and maybe..loves.

He stays with her a while longer, enjoying the feeling of having someone sharing his bed. She really is incredibly beautiful. Taller, and fuller of body than Adison, and somehow even more woman because of that.

She looks totally at peace now, not in pain, not plagued by insecurity or remorse. To a vampire, sleep apparently is the total rest that humans can only wish for. This reminds him of his lively and totally unfamiliar dream last night. That must have come from Mina, he knows she has been to India, and that far country must look a lot like the place of his dream.

But if that is true, if a vampire dreams too, they cannot experience total peace in their sleep. And if the body is powerless, and the mind just as restless inside, without the ability to wake up out of a nightmare, the enforced sleep of a vampire may become torture, especially if the vampire has escaped being controlled by evil like Mina.

If she remembers anything from her past, she may suffer a lot of guilt, more than she can handle by herself. Well, he has done some despicable things too, not even controlled by an evil master, so he hopes she will choose to confide in him if she needs to share it.

When he enters the kitchen, Vincent and Adison are still there, having breakfast. The sun is already high, the day half gone. Small wonder after such an excursion.

They greet him as one, Adison stands up and gives him a good warm hug. How does she always know what he needs? Vincent looks fine, Victor asks, 'Do you feel as good as you look this morning? Wounds not bothering you?'

'I feel fine, it hurts of course, but no swelling, no fever. A few painkillers and I'm ready for the stage tonight. And how is your patient?'

He must have reacted, for Adison asks concernedly, 'Something happened, nothing bad, I hope?' Victor sits down and accepts the cup of tea that Vincent hands him. How to tell this? Sipping from the cup, he starts,

'She looks fine, comatose, but her colour and temperature are fine, as far as I can tell. She breathes, very slowly and very shallowly, but I think that's normal as well.'

He tries to formulate what happened, just the facts.

'Remember Bruce saying she wouldn't wake till sundown today? I dreamt of exotic places and strange people, and woke disoriented. When I came back to the now, I found myself in Mina's embrace. She was fast asleep right behind me. Her body was warm through my warmth. My movement didn't wake her. She must have woken up before sundown and decided to join me in my bed. Why do you think she did that?' he asks, almost plaintively.

This of course is for Adison to answer, though Vincent experiences a shiver of recollection, involuntarily reminded of the utter loneliness he once felt himself. Adison remembers that moment as well, he can see it in the way she looks at him. Then she looks at Victor.

'Dear friend, she probably woke up in the night, sad and very lonely, and she felt the need to be close to someone, someone who had been nice to her, even sweet. You saved her, then fed her and you accepted her hand and held it. She was probably very glad you were there for her, even though you were fast asleep.'

Victor is silent for a few moments, then confesses, 'I'm afraid I'm already more than halfway in love with her. Do you think I'm setting myself up to be hurt? Did she only come to me because there was no-one else, because I was the warmest thing near? Miss Yves told me she is married.'

'Of course you can get hurt, my dear, love always gives the other the power to hurt you. But yesterday she seemed very encouraging towards you. You are a very sweet and handsome man, you know. As for her marriage: can you seriously imagine her going back to her husband as a vampire?' Now Vincent looks quite concerned.

'But please Adison and Victor, do remember what Bruce said about blood giving someone power! Though on second thought, she's had her share of your blood already, so that is kind of too late.' They are all a bit sorry that it is only late summer, for they will have to wait that much longer until she wakes up.

'That reminds me,' Vincent says, 'you will want to stay here with her, Victor, but wouldn't it be safer if Adison is here as well when she wakes up? The enemy may want her back.'

Adison looks at Victor.

'What do you want, do you want me around?'

Not wanting to separate the two lovers, but not quite ready to face a beautiful young woman on his own either, he says, 'Actually, I would feel safer with you around. Not because I think she is still under the influence of the enemy, but because I'm afraid to mess up. I'm not entirely accountable with her around, I'm afraid.'

But Adison worries about Vincent.

'Will you be all right on your own? You're still wounded pretty badly.'

'I know, therefore I'll send a boy to Bruce and ask him to pick me up and bring me home. I'll have the best fighter in the city as my personal guard.'

And with that, Adison is completely satisfied.

A day passes fast when you get up really late. And before they know it, Bruce is there with Maud, to take Vincent to the theatre. Adison has fed Vincent some painkillers, and given him some to take with him for the rest of the night. She has padded the wounds extra firmly, to be sure he will not bleed for real on stage.

While the guys talk about the events of last night, she draws Maud aside and tells her Vincent is wounded, knowing he'd never tell her he is in pain by himself, but certain Maud will take care not put pressure on his chest the coming nights. Maud promises to keep an eye on him for Adison.

As they set off, dusk is beginning to fall. Adison urges Victor to stay at Mina's side.

'It is important that she is not alone when she wakes up. You go sit with her. Don't feed her without me, though. She has probably never spared her prey, so until she knows when to stop I want to be there. I love you too, you know.'

This encourages Victor to actually dare sit with Mina, and he picks up some notes that need sorting and a book, and enters her room. It is pitch dark, so he lights a lamp. Then he sits down on the bed and watches Mina sleep. She hasn't moved a muscle since he left, and she is showing no signs of waking up yet. He wonders what she will feel like when she wakes up, will she be glad to be free, or will she feel guilty for the things she has done?

Or maybe she will be like Vincent, totally forgetful. Though he doubts that, Adison would never do that to anyone, her cure cannot have been like a lightning strike combined with the chemical mixture he infused the body with to resurrect it. Not only did it cause Vincent the excruciating pain, but he thinks it also bleached his skin to white and his eyes from brown to yellow. He has burned his notes on that process, not wanting anyone able to repeat it.

Musing about his own misdeed, he has forgotten all about his notes and book. He has felt guilty a lot, realizing he tried to outdo God without having any insight in the consequences. Imagining what might have happened if Adison had not been there is very painful, and he has used it often to punish himself for his hubris.

But at the same time it has brought him so much: friends, love, a new career as a practising doctor, weapons skills. It is a strange paradox, but he has learned to live with it, trying to make amends, try being a better person. He hopes that in time, he can help Mina to face her misdeeds, too. Suddenly he becomes aware of a small sound. Concentrating on it, he guesses it must be someone weeping softly, afraid to be heard. Mina. She must be awake, and not well.

Shyly he moves towards her, seeing her still lying on his pallet, but curled up like a child, head covered with the blanket. He doesn't know what to do, this has never been his strength. Thinking of Adison, he starts with just carefully touching the girl, to let her know he is here for her.

The sound stops, and very slowly she looks up. Seeing him, she shows him her anguished face, and he no longer needs to think of what to do. He hold out his arms to her, and she unhesitatingly moves into his embrace.

With her face on his chest, still crying quietly, she holds on to him so firmly it nearly hurts. He strokes her beautiful blond hair, and waits for her to say anything, do anything. And for a while nothing else happens, they sit there, holding on to each other.

Then Victor breaks the silence.

'Are you in pain?'

'Not in physical pain, no. Your operation worked perfectly, though I still don't understand why you saved my worthless shadow of a life. I was one of the enemy, why didn't you leave me there to die?' Victor cannot take blame or credit for that.

'That was Adison's decision actually. She got the enemy's hooks out of you, then took you along with us. I suppose she judged you could be saved in both ways.'

She looks up at him again, crying.

'I've done such terrible things, you cannot imagine. You'd hate me if you knew, I hate myself for it.' Victor brings his head really close to hers, touching her face with his.

'You were under an evil spell, you must not hate yourself for everything you did. Take responsibility for the decisions you made when you were still your own person. And try to become a better person than you were, make reparations and in time, you may forgive yourself.'

His plea to take responsibility has touched her, and she observes, 'It sounds as if you have been through that process yourself, as if you have once made bad decisions and did evil things because of that.'

'I did, and I did them in full possession of my senses and of my own free will. I have tried to make reparations to the person I hurt deeply, and he has forgiven me, he even loves me now. I hope I have become a better person since then as well.'

Mina has stopped crying, but she has not tried to put more distance between the two of them. If anything, she feels more comfortable in his embrace, interested in his history of making amends rather than bent on feeling sorry for herself.

'Will you stay with me? May I stay with you? I feel so lonely,' she pleads.

Victor smiles at her and finds the courage to kiss her hair. It smells just like a normal woman. He answers, 'I was just going to ask you the exact same thing.'

After half an hour, they hear a knock on the door, and at their invitation Adison comes in. Victor realizes that though she is not even twenty, she is the pillar under their little group. She can fade into any background completely, but she can just as easily take charge and delegate under any circumstance.

No-one even suggested leaving Mina behind to die when Adison decided to take her along. And though she was in a really bad state when it happened, Mina clearly knows, that though Victor removed the bullets and thought to feed her, it was Adison who saved her from possession and certain damnation.

Her face lights up as she sees Adison, and she is very happy to get a familiar hug from her. Apparently Adison is perfectly ready to include Mina in their circle. She sits on the bed and asks, 'How are you doing today, feeling better?'

'I'm perfectly fit and in no pain, and very glad to be free, but I'm starting to realize what has happened to me, what I have done to others, and what I have lost. Victor has already talked to me about it, he understands very clearly. But it will take some time to adjust to my new situation, and to accept responsibility for my actions.'

Mina's regained consciousness of deeds and her life distresses her very much, this is easy to see. Victor longs to comfort her again, but he doesn't want to push himself on her. He catches Adison's eye, and she sends him an encouraging look, nudging him towards Mina.

That gives him enough courage to take Mina in his arms again, and she relaxes into them, resting her head on his chest. She is crying again, very quietly, and Victor bends over her, sheltering her from the world. He feels her pain, and resolves to help her find her way through it, until she can accept the direction her life has taken.

Adison feels kind of superfluous, so she sneaks out and closes the door behind her. There will be plenty of time to share information with Mina, and hear her memories. Vincent needs to be there anyway, for it is clear they knew each other in his former life.

Adison finds that thought a bit unnerving, what if he finds out that he is married, and he starts to remember a wife and children? Where would that leave her? She is so attached to Vincent now, could she live without him, have him revert to his former name and life?

Still, she knows they need to see this through, they all have a past looming over them, and she will have to find a way to live with that. She busies herself with the books she has borrowed from her magic teachers, and lets herself be immersed in the knowledge that may save more lives and souls in the days to come. When Vincent comes back, she will be ready to face his past with him.