Of Toffee Bites and Copperheads

Feeling fairly sadistic, I smirked and quickly scooted forward so that my piss flew directly into her open, moaning mouth. She sputtered and coughed momentarily before giving me that melt-my-insides look and devouring my urine like she'd been doing it since birth.

All throughout this fragrant fiasco, we pissed and farted and shat as we pleased, and soon the diner was overwhelmed with our womanly scent. She and I basked in it as we fucked like slutty bunnies, ripe with heat and hunger for the obscene.

We were sweaty and soiled and severely aroused as we humped against each other's cunts, pissing and shitting all over each other intermittently. I cannot even remember how many times I came in that beautiful brown blur; the number was too massive to count.

For all the sadist she'd been earlier, she sure enjoyed being submissive once we started fucking. She laid on her back like a virgin school girl allowing me to fuck her sweet, tight pussy for the first time. Not that I minded. I kind of enjoyed being on top, calling the shots.

All the men I'd ever fucked wanted me to submit to their cocks like the 'lady' I was supposed to pretend to be. Then they'd jizz inside of me and be on their way. All I ever was to them was a piece of fine ginger ass. I always knew that. And I've always despised men. I just didn't realize I was gay until I met my first girlfriend in my sophomore year of college. She was a swanky black girl named Deandra Leone, a sophomore in the same psychology course as me. Compared to what Climaco and I were currently doing, my sexual achievements with Deandra were fairly vanilla. It took me at least two months to convince her to let me rim her big black ass and it wasn't a week or so after that when she decided I was too 'freaky' for her and broke it off with me. I had two long-term girlfriends after that and quite a few one night stands, but, nothing I ever did with them could compare to the downright dirty things I was doing with this statuesque deviant lying -shuddering, eyes screwed shut, mouth agape and reeking of piss and cum- in front of me.

I decided to make a bold move, swinging my body around so that my ass was positioned right above her face.

"Nice ass, Annie. You got a lot of back for a white girl, huh?" she commented. If you couldn't see what we were doing, you'd hear that comment and think we were just showing off our sexy outfits to each other. That's how nonchalant she was being about this entire sordid thing. In fact, that had been the first full sentence she'd spoken since we'd started.

I giggled evilly, "Yeah, you could definitely say that," Slap, bubble, slap went my fine white ass right into her sexy brown face, "Mmm, do you like it when I shove my smelly white ass in your face and degrade you like that? Hmm?" I shoved my behind energetically into her face, wiping my ass and cunt off with her nose and lips. I could feel her tongue exploring my cunt, cleaning me so expertly I was damn sure this hadn't been the first time she'd done something like this.

She let out a muffled response and I smiled, "Open up wide for mommy, okay? Mommy's gonna use your whore mouth as a toilet."

She immediately obeyed, and after a few more farts and another very strong stream of piss, I settled in for the main event. I could feel a surprisingly large amount of feces still residing inside of me and begging to come out. Obliging my body, I gave a slight push and like a volcano erupting, my soft brown lava came spouting out of me and into her receptive, submissive mouth. As she ate my shit, she continued to eat my pussy as well, servicing me better than anyone ever had. I jumped and gasped at the touch of her tongue, light and forceful in all the right ways. Whenever she moaned, it would reverberate throughout my entire body and I'd shake with ecstasy.

It wasn't long until my lava ceased, but, Climaco's tongue never let up. I was overwhelmed by her expertise and my cunt was dripping wet in no time at all. Everything that had happened in the last hour had drastically turned me on. I couldn't believe what a masochistic, exhibitionistic slut I really was. My toes curled tightly and I knew I was about the come again.

"Climaco," I gasped, my voice strained and breathless, "I'm gonna come! Ah, tongue fuck me, you fucking bitch! Don't you fucking stop!" I rode her face like a shit-slicked roller coaster until I experienced an orgasm so strong, my entire body shook for a full thirty seconds with tremors, my back arched nearly painfully, my fingernails digging into the hardwood floor.

"Ahhh, Climaco, you fucking dirty cum-whore! I fucking love you, you shit-eating cunt!" I screamed as I came, my entire world flashing a bright white until it was over and my energy had completely drained from my body. I collapsed on top of her before weakly rolling onto my stomach, my body feeling weak and racked with rapturous exhaustion.

I turned my head slightly and looked at Climaco, her face smeared with my shit, her lips closed and her eyes intense and serious. If anyone in this world could genuinely look serious after literally eating a stranger's shit and letting them wipe their ass on your face, it was her. It was those eyes of hers, those hauntingly stormy silver eyes, which I could now see, up close like this, were flecked with gold and outlined in an even darker grey color. Beautiful, and so adept at portraying so much emotion.

I managed to move close enough to connect our lips together, loving the taste of our intermingled waste on her tongue as she wrestled hers with mine. I pulled her close to me and gazed into those beautiful eyes, wondering how I ever found such a diamond in the rough. Another kiss, a much more chaste one, and I felt like I could fall asleep here, holding my dream girl in my arms, surrounded by a sea of shame. But, I knew we had to make our escape. The authorities would be after us soon enough. I made to get up, but, was pulled back down by a confused-looking Climaco.

"Where are you going, Annie?"

"We'll surely go to prison if we stay here. I'm surprised we haven't been arrested yet." It was strange. The entire place had been abandoned and not one person had entered since then. Looking up at the clock, I saw that it was four thirty. We'd been here for two whole hours without being disturbed.

Climaco pulled my face back down by the chin and had a sleazy, shitty grin on her face, that same glitter in her eyes as when she first walked in the diner, blowing me away. "Didn't you know? I'm the mayor's favorite little niece. I can do just about anything I like, just so long as it isn't murder or anything serious like that."

Understanding dawned on my face. So, the crafty bitch had planned on humiliating us all along! I grinned back at her, lavishing in the lasciviousness of this moment. I peed a little on her pussy and she wrestled me to the ground and farted messily into my mouth. I laughed and we continued to wrestle until we started fucking again. And when we were completely pooped, we laid on the floor a little longer until it started getting dark outside and the shit was beginning to reek in a bad way.

Leaving the mess out in the main dining area for the janitors to clean, we entered the bathroom and washed each other off as best we could, using hot water and the clean parts of our clothes as rags. We got most of it off then walked out into the night nude, which made me slightly nervous until I saw that her '47 Chevy had been parked right outside the joint. We hopped inside and she drove us to her house where we took a classy bath together (sipping vodka from champagne glasses as we scrubbed each other's flesh) and participated in some slightly more hygienic activities (some fart play and cunnilingous as we watched Lolita and Orphan) before hitting the hay in her luxurious king-size bed.

We've now been more than happily married for two years; Climaco proposed to me five months in and I saw no reason to say no. I sometimes still can't believe how badly I lucked out. I got the promotion offer, but, turned it down, actually quit my job so that I could be a stay-at-home wife for my exotic lesbian lover. I didn't need to work anyways; Climaco gets a very nice bundle of cash from her uncle every month in exchange for some 'favors' she'd rather I not disclose. But, I'm sure you can utilize your filthy imaginations, so what does it matter anyways?

All I know is that I found my chocolate diamond, and I wouldn't give her up for the world.