Passion at Penn State

You know, maybe I'd be better off if I didn't get lucky today, so that I'd have a chance to put one of these things on without Denise seeing me, to figure out what I'm doing. But, crap, that's not what I want to happen!

I got to Denise's, knocked on the door and heard a "Just a second!" from inside. About 15 seconds later, I heard the chain being loosened and the deadbolt unlocked, and Denise opened the door, with a sweet smile on her face. She gave me a quick kiss, then turned and said, "Come on in!"

I guess that Denise was serious about homework, because she had her laptop open, a printer set up, and books all over the place. The apartment had a breakfast bar set up, with a couple of barstools, and she motioned me to set my stuff up there. Her computer was hooked up to an ethernet cable, but she said that the place had Wi-Fi for my laptop.

"Want me to order a pizza?" I asked, and she smiled and said yeah, but maybe a little later.

Good Lord, Denise was nice to look at! Her apartment got a lot of natural light, and she was completely casually dressed, but still looked amazing to me! She was wearing some slightly low-riding white sweatpants with "PINK" emblazoned on the butt, and a blue Penn State t-shirt, one which showed some bare lower back when she sat down. I looked, but couldn't see any obvious panty lines, wondering if maybe she was going commando, before I spotted the barest hint of color: it looked like she was wearing a thong, a red one, under those sweats. The t-shirt wasn't the slightest bit see-through, but it was obvious that she was wearing a bra. She was barefoot, showing off some frosty-white painted toenails.

Thing is, Denise was sweet as a girl can be, casually sexy, and mostly business about getting our work done. She really did have a lot of work to do, and we hammered at it steadily until around 2:30, when she asked me, "How about that pizza?"

"What do you like on it?" I asked, and we wound up with a large vegetarian, with plenty of mushrooms, black olives and some banana peppers on it. I figured that a tiny girl like Denise couldn't eat more than a couple of slices, but she ate her half of the pizza like it was nothing, and wound up with one of mine. Domino's had brought a liter of Coke with it, and a lot of that disappeared, too.

One thing about Denise, she was a worker! I got completely caught up with my work, and even a bit ahead of the game, 'cause she was steadily plugging at it for most of the afternoon. We'd gotten right back to it after the pizza break, and even just doing homework, it was such a pleasure to be sitting next to her, enjoying her company and her occasional sweet smiles that I was as happy as I had ever been. She gave me just enough brief kisses to let me know I wasn't being friend-zoned, but nothing that even hinted that we'd be headed for bed.

OK, fine, she wanted to take it slow, I could take it slow. Considering that everything had been at a dead stop before meeting Denise, I was still doing really well.

It was around 5:00 when all of the stuff that had to be printed out or turned in was done, and Denise retreated to the couch, having some reading to get done. She was on the left-hand side, so I took the right, with my iPad/Kindle reader, and started back in on Fort Sumpter to Perryville. In a few minutes, Denise swung her feet up into my lap, and, heck, that was the sexiest thing ever, as I gently massaged her feet. She was smiling through that, so I could tell I was doing a good job, and she seemed happy; I know that I was. I know that I wasn't getting much reading done, and several times I had to reset my iPad, 'cause it shut down to inactivity. Finally, I just set it down, to concentrate on Denise's foot massage, and she got the message, and set her book down as well.

"Are you happy, Dennis?" she asked me.

"Yeah, I am. This is nice."

"Really? I'm the one getting the foot massage." She was smiling broadly.

"Doesn't mean I'm not enjoying giving you one."

"That's really sweet. Can I say something serious now?"

Uh oh, what's coming up. "Sure, absolutely." I tried to keep a smile on my face, or at least keep a worried look off of it!

"When you opened your wallet, to pay for the pizza, I saw that you had a couple condoms in it." Denise had a completely serious look on her face. "I don't know, maybe we'll get there, but not tonight. That OK with you?"

"Hey, no problem! I didn't know where this was going, but I figured it would only be responsible to be prepared. I really do like you, you know." I hoped like heck I hadn't fouled up everything. Damn it, why couldn't I have thought about this, and kept those condoms concealed better? I was mentally kicking myself.

"I like you, too, Dennis, I think maybe a lot. I just don't want to rush things, OK?"

I already knew what the right answer was. "Yeah, it's OK. Maybe not rushing things will make things better in the long run." I knew that was the right answer, but it killed me to have to give it.

"Watch a movie with me?" Denise asked.

"Sure," I said, not really caring for a movie, but not wanting to leave. So, Denise got up, and put a DVD on. She had a good TV, a 42" high def, and then sat down on the couch, beside me, close, but not quite cuddled up.

"I guess that you'll need the subtitles," she grinned, as she activated them, and she was right: the movie was in Korean.

"You told me that your mom was Korean, but I thought you'd been born here. Do you speak Korean?"

"Not as well as I'd like, but some. This movie, I've seen it a few times before, and I'm all in on the dialogue."

The movie was Architecture 101, and it was a split-time romance movie, and the 'early' sequence has two architecture students - South Korean nerds? - wanting each other, but split by misunderstanding. They meet again many years later, by which time the guy was engaged, and though he meets his presumably first love, he winds up staying true to his fiancée. By the end of the movie, which I was able to follow well enough despite having to rely on the subtitles, Denise and I were wonderfully cuddled up, her head on my shoulder and her arms around me.

I was just enthralled! After the movie ended, Denise turned off the television with the remote, never leaving the couch or our cuddle. Nothing was said, and I guess that no words were needed, as we just sat there, holding each other. By now, it was starting to get darker in the apartment, as dusk created a romantic setting, and Denise gently fell asleep in my arms.

The problem with being a nerd is that we're smart enough to know what we need to do, academically, but completely clueless about how to get things done. Denise had told me, plainly enough, that she wanted to be romanced, and I didn't have the first flaming idea how to do that! Trouble is, she was just so casually sexy - did she even realize that? - that it was difficult for an inexperienced fool like me to know how to separate the romance she wanted from the desire to just rip off her clothes and take her, right there, the way I imagined sex ought to be. My fumbling with Vanessa sure never prepared me for this. Denise's right arm was resting around my waist, bare inches from an achingly hard member that she'd already told me I wouldn't get to use tonight.

I tried to figure this all out, and finally realized what I had to do: I had to fall asleep, just like this, with Denise in my arms, to let her sleep and dream and then wake up with me, without us having sex. That would establish the trust she needed to have in me. I thought about trying to pick her up and carry her to bed, to tuck her in and climb in beside her, still dressed, and never forcing everything. Still, maybe if I was a jock, I could do that, but, despite how tiny she was, I wasn't confident that I was strong enough to pick her up and carry her like that without busting her head on the door frame. I guess that I'd just have to sleep right here with her.

Then things got worse for me. I'd decided what I needed to do, to make Denise happy, when I noticed it: in her moving around and cuddling, the waist of her sweatpants had worked its way lower, and not only was part of that red thong she was wearing partly in view, but there were a few black pubic hairs peeking out the top. I went from settling into a romance frame of mind right back to a body screaming for sex, yet with sex still off limits.

I just couldn't pull my eyes away! I thought that my cock was going to explode, but I couldn't move, and there was no relief in sight. I was wearing jeans, jeans which were getting uncomfortably tight, so my dick wasn't out and bobbing around her, and there was nothing I could do about it. If I could have torn my eyes away, maybe the pressure would subside, but I was completely locked in.

Sleep, like this? No way I was going to fall asleep now, and I was stuck there, unable to move.

And things got even worse yet, as I started to realize: I had to pee. The longer I sat there, not moving, the more and more conscious I became of the building pressure on my bladder.

Finally, finally! I got some relief, as Denise stirred awake. "Hey, you," she whispered, with the sweetest smile I've ever seen on her lips. She kissed my chest, through my t-shirt, lightly, and then got up to head for the bathroom. After she came back out, it was everything I could do to walk, and not run, to the john, to relieve my aching bladder.

When I came back out, Denise put her arms around my neck, and kissed me lightly, before asking, "Was that OK for you, me falling asleep like that? I wasn't trying to tease you or anything."

I could only tell the truth. "It was wonderful, pure heaven on earth, to be holding you like that." That got me a huge smile, and a hug.

"Even without sex?"

"Even without sex. When we're ready for that, it'll happen." I deliberately used 'we're' rather than 'you're,' thinking it would imply more of a couple thing, rather than maybe seeming like I was complaining.

"God, you are just so perfect!" Her smile was huge, in her deep brown eyes as well as on her lips. Then she walked over to the apartment door, and fastened the pull chain.

What was happening? If she fastened that chain, the door was not going to be opened again tonight, and that meant she wanted me to stay. Given the stress on no sex yet, I was speechless. Then, taking both of my hands, she asked me, with the most wonderful look on her face, "Even with no sex, will you stay with me?"

I'm not even sure if I said yes or not, verbally, but I smiled at her and nodded my head, and she pulled me into her bedroom. Wordlessly, she pulled off her sweatpants, leaving her standing there in her blue Penn State t-shirt and a low-rise red thong. I was just stunned for a second, and then she climbed into bed and under the covers. "Please" was all she said, whispered so lightly I wasn't even sure I heard it, rather than just reading it on her lips. As casually as I could manage - not easy, with something hard in my underwear - I unbuttoned and pulled off my pants and t-shirt, and, still wearing my Fruit-of-the-Looms - damn it, I wish that I had worn boxers! - I got into bed with her. Denise reached up and flipped a switch, killing the single table lamp which had illuminated the room, and she became just a shadow to my eyes. "Hold me," she whispered, as she moved against me and rested her head on my shoulder, her left hand idly playing with my chest.

My mind was trying to process what was happening! Here I was, in bed for the night with a wonderful girl, and I wasn't going to be allowed to make love to her. What she wanted was for me to hold her, to kiss her lightly, and to be there when she woke up in the morning. Lord, this was like a teenaged girl's romantic fantasies, or at least what I thought a teenaged girl would fantasize about.

It sure wasn't what guys fantasize about, I'll tell you that! Guys fantasize about rampant fucking, about driving girls wild with the power and skill of our cocks, and that was certainly what I wanted to happen between us. Too bad I don't have any actual experience in doing that, my fumbling copulation with Vanessa hardly counting. In my mind, Denise would be giving me head, and happily swallowing every drop when I came in her mouth. Then, still hard as a rock, I'd enter her, driving her to a whole cascade of orgasms before I roared out my own, in a voice that would shake the whole building.

But, in reality, there was no rampant fucking; there was only Denise's soft breathing, only her hand lightly playing with my chest, never getting anywhere close to my cock. Of course, that might be a good thing, 'cause I was so turned on that if she had touched it, it might go off!

I don't know how long I laid awake, gently caressing her hair and her shoulder; I do know that Denise fell asleep before I did. But eventually, I drifted off to sleep. I awoke to daylight filling the bedroom, and Denise's soft lips kissing me, just barely grazing mine, with an amazing smile on her face, in her eyes. I wish that I could describe the thrill that coursed through me, that very first morning waking up with a woman beside me, but I honestly don't have the words for it.

I don't know if Denise was feeling what I was, but her every movement, every expression said that she did, or at least how women feel on a morning like this. Her left hand on my chest, she was leaning up on her right elbow, looking down at me, smiling, and covering my face with sweet kisses. I caressed her back with my left hand, which was still kind of pinned under her, and stroked her cheek with my right. The fact is that she was happy and I was happy, and even though I didn't get to make love to her, this really was a wonderful morning. After a few more minutes, she smiled at me again, and said, "BRB," then getting out of bed and heading for the bathroom.

And what a beautiful sight she was! She walked away from the bed, in just that blue t-shirt and a tiny red thong, stretching her arms above her head for a bit, and showing some bare lower back with a pair of cute lower back dimples. I was just amazed that such a cute girl actually liked me.

I sat up in the bed, with the covers still up to my waist, waiting for Denise to return. Would she get back in bed with me? Would she maybe be interested in sex now? Of course, I had my morning wood anyway, along with my extreme arousal, and I tried to casually arrange the covers to look like I wasn't showing off my erection, but still let her know that I had one. That's one of the problems with being a nerd: we tend to overthink things.

A minute or so later, she emerged, still smiling, and said, "Sorry I don't have a spare toothbrush for you, but I can pick up a couple of new ones, if you want to use mine. You want a big breakfast, or are you more of a bagel-for-breakfast type?"

"Why don't you surprise me?" Oh, man, that was the perfect answer, and I surprised myself by coming up with it.

"Good deal," she answered, and headed into the kitchen, still in just the t-shirt and thong.

Man, I wish that I had worn boxers! In my tighty-whiteys, I kept overthinking what I should do. Denise was still walking around in that wonderful thong, which would mean I could walk around in my underwear, if I'd worn boxers, but the briefs were anything but sexy. Yet, if I pulled on my jeans, Denise might think she had to put on pants as well, and that absolutely was not what I wanted. In the end, I pulled on my jeans, 'cause I figured they'd look better, but left my t-shirt on the floor.

Then the bathroom mirror told the truth: my chest was anything but impressive. I was skinny and lacked definition, and just plain unimpressive. I used Denise's toothbrush, 'cause I had to get rid of morning breath, and spotted a bottle of Scope in there as well, and used it. Then, I got an idea, and called out, "Denise, do I have time for a quick shower, or is breakfast already done?" If she said a shower, I could take care of my horns quick, and then if this morning did turn into sex, I wouldn't shoot off in five seconds!

"Come on out, already ready," was her answer, so no shower just yet.

Denise kind of giggled and said, "I guess that you do need that shower," as she ran her fingers through my messy hair. If I don't shampoo every morning, my hair looks like crap, all over the place. Then she reached up and kissed me again. "Still, you look nice this morning," she added, which I wasn't sure was genuine, or her trying to boost my ego.

Breakfast was simple, just coffee and bagels, toasted with cream cheese. Denise was still wearing just the t-shirt and thong, as casually as can be, and I was just a total wreck. I mean, I could understand her walking around in underwear like that if we were real lovers, but we weren't, not yet, and she's way too smart not to know what effect this had on me. She was seated on one barstool, and I was on the other, and we were mostly facing each other. With her legs crossed, it almost looked like she wasn't wearing any underwear at all.

"Dennis," she started, "you're really an amazing guy." I smiled at that, but wondered what was coming next. "I know that I put a lot of pressure on you last night, what with sex off the table and all, but you were so wonderfully kind and respectful, and I loved waking up in your arms. Do you have any idea what that meant to me?"

"Well, it was like the greatest feeling in the world, waking up next to you, seeing your smile in the morning, but I'll admit that I don't really understand this yet. I mean, if you'd sent me home yesterday, I'd have understood things a bit better, and I guess that I'm really confused right now. I'm happy, but still a bit confused."

"I am too, Dennis, and I'm not sure what I'm feeling, but I'm really enjoying being with you. Can you accept this for what it is right now?"

"Yeah, I can," I replied, thinking to myself that it wasn't like I had any choice. "I'm having a wonderful time just being with you."

And that part was true enough. Yeah, I wanted sex - what guy doesn't? - but what it looked like was that I was getting an actual girlfriend. Denise hadn't mentioned the first thing about 'going together,' whatever the Hell that means these days, but things were still moving along nicely, if not quite the way I ever imagined things could. Thing is, I never had a real girlfriend before, and had no flaming idea what to do.

"How about we take the David's Vista trail today? You ever go hiking before?"

"A couple of times, but not often. The trails in Delaware are mostly flat and boring, and I didn't have any friends who were interested in that kind of thing."

"Silly boy, you don't take your friends hiking, you take your girlfriend hiking." Denise stood up, put her arms around my neck and kissed me when she said that. I put my arms around her waist at that, wishing that I had also been standing - I was still on the barstool - and that my arms could reach down and squeeze her bare butt. Still, I was about as elated as I could be that she said that she was my girlfriend. I wanted to ask her about that, but didn't know how to put it, and, thank God she had my lips otherwise occupied, I realized that it was best to keep my stupid mouth shut about that for now. I was ecstatic, but I was still scared to death that I was going to flub this up somehow.

"C'mon, let's get those showers, and get out of here," Denise said, releasing me and heading for the bathroom.

"Shower together?" I asked, without thinking. Oh, shit, did I just fuck up?

"Do you think you can do that and still respect my limits?"

"It'll be hard, but yes, I can, and do."

"Pun intended?" she asked me, with a big grin on her face.

"Oh, Hell, I never thought of it that way."

"No, sure you didn't," Denise laughed at me, pulling off her t-shirt as she headed for the bathroom.