Remember The Magic

Let me introduce myself, my name is Amanda, I'm eighteen years old, and still live at home with my mother and younger brother Bryan who is seven. This is a story of how Christmas took on a whole new meaning for me.

Our Christmas tree was lopsided, with a few bald spots, and even looked more pathetic with the few presents under it. However, it was all my mother could afford. Ever since the divorced she barely enough money to pay bills, let alone buy presents. You see, my dad is a penny pinching greedy person who I have dubbed, "Scrooge." The reason being, that he'd paid his lawyer a lot of money to make sure his wife and children wouldn't get a dime from him.

After my parents split, mom had to take a job working as a receptionist for a local financial service. It didn't pay a lot, and required that she work long hours, but it did pay the rent. She didn't have enough to buy extras, so I decided to help by taking a job at a local department store. The hours were the same as Bryan's school time, so mom wouldn't have to pay for a sitter. It only paid minimum wage, but I felt that I was doing my part to ease mother's financial burden. Between mother and me we were able to buy a few presents for Christmas.

Mom and I knew the true meaning of Christmas, and also knew there was no Santa Claus. We decided to keep that bit of truth to ourselves, because we wanted to make sure Bryan still believed in the magic of Christmas.

Many nights I would hear mom crying and knew it was because she was lonely. One day I asked her, "Mom, maybe you should look for a decent man who will not treat you like daddy did."

She just bowed her head and said, Amanda, I really don't think I can be happy with anyone else, especially after what you father did to me. I just don't trust men anymore."

I didn't push the subject and wished there was something I could do to change her attitude. I prayed that one some day, a man could convince her that all men aren't bad. However, in the back of my head, I wasn't so sure myself, because something happen between my father and I that I have never told anyone about.

It was Christmas Eve. We sent Bryan to bed early and then got out the presents and placed them under the tree. Afterwards mom and I stood there hugging each other. She turned to me with tears in her eyes and whispered, "Merry Christmas honey."

I held back the tears and replied, "Thanks mom, but I don't feel like celebrating Christmas this year, and there is no magic in Christmas for me. I will pretend for Bryan's sake only."

Mom turned to me and frowned, "Now don't let what you father did ruin your holiday spirit honey, as there is always magic in the air at Christmas."

I kissed her cheek, frowned, and grumbled, "Ah hum-bug, good-night momma, see you in the morning."

Mom kissed me back and uttered, "Goodnight baby, I'll be up for awhile if you need to talk things out."

I walked into my room, got ready for bed, and told myself mom needed some time alone so I would just try and go to sleep.

I wasn't asleep for more than two hours when I hear strange noise. I wasn't sure what it was or who it was. As I trembled all over, I crept out of bed, picked up my baseball bat, trying to look courageous, and quietly walked toward the sound of the noise. So help me, if someone was stealing what little we had for Christmas they'd pay.

When I got near the living room where our tree was I gasped, no one was there. The tree was loaded with present and whoever did it, left the front door open. I walked into the room and said out loud, "Who, what, MOM!"

Mom came running as if I'd been hurt and when she neared the room. When she entered the room she stopped, grabbed the nearest chair to hold onto so she wouldn't pass out, and shouted, "Ooooh my goodness!" She blinked, rubbed her eyes, and said, "Am I dreaming?"

I walked over to her and put my arm around her and chirped, "No I don't think this is a dream." I pointed to tree and said, "I heard a noise and came running in here, and that is what I saw. Mother, how—who—dang, who could have done this?"

She just smiled and whispered, "All I can think of dear is, the magic of Christmas. But between you and me if Bryan asks it was Santa Claus, okay."

I scratched my head, and mumbled "Okay, but I'll pretend for his sake, but I still don't believe in the magic of Christmas. It was probably daddy, with a guilty conscious."

Mom just laughed and said, "Who know, I've seen stranger miracles happen. As for your dad, that would be a stretch."

We both hugged each other and mom whispered, "Let's go back to bed before we awaken Bryan. Amanda, I want you to try and look surprised in the morning okay?"

We both snuck back toward our bedrooms, on the way, mom checked on Bryan to make sure he was still asleep. She gave me the thumbs up and I entered my room and crawled back into bed.

I lay there unable to sleep with a million thoughts running through my head. I frowned well I know it definitely wasn't a Santa Claus, because there is no such person. Maybe, it could be someone else, but I couldn't think of anyone, not even daddy. It was then I began to consider the idea and asked out-loud, "Is there really magic in the air at Christmas? I shock my head and said, "No-way, silly girl."

Then out of the darkness I heard a strange man's voice, "What makes you think there is not magic in the air at Christmas time?"

I jumped, almost fell off the bed, dang near pee'd my pants and bit my tongue. I squinted to see if I could make out a figure and asked, "Who's there?"

Whoever it was never answered me, so I got out of bed turned on my light to check the room out. No one was there, so I decided I had been dreaming, curled up with my blanket and fell asleep.

I must have begun to dream, because I heard the voice again, this time it said, "Christmas is magic Amanda."

As I looked on the corner of my bed, there sat Santa, a jolly fat man with white hair and a red suit. I rubbed my eyes and stammered, "How—did—you—know my name?"

With a twinkle in his deep blue eyes Santa replied, "I know everyone's name. If you believe, many things that seem impossible can happen this time of year."

All I could do was st straight up in bed and mumble, "But..."

He moved closer and sat next to me, touched my shoulder and said, "Amanda, I know that you and your mother have worked very hard to make Christmas happen for Bryan. She is still trying to forget the man who hurt her. So, I'm giving you all something to make this Christmas extra special."

I turned my face to him, frowned, and yelled, "Why are you talking to me then?"

He just smiled and said, "You are the one who didn't believe in Christmas magic. I also know there was nothing under the tree for you, so I'm here to give it to you personally."

I looked at him with wide eyed amazement and said, "That because I didn't want anything this year, except to make Bryan happy."

Santa looked at me and smiled and replied, "I also know that your father raped you on your sixteenth birthday. It made you afraid of all men, and that is one on the reasons you make excuses to not go out on a date."

My jaw fell open, and tears welled up in my eyes and with a quiver in my voice I said, "How in earth did you know that, I never told anyone, not even momma?"

He looked into my green-eye and said, "I know everything. Now let me show you that all men aren't rapists like your father."

He then took me into his muscular arms and held me on his lap as if I were a hurt child. As he did, he uttered, "Let it go baby, the memories will only destroy you."

With tears in my eyes, I fought against his arms and screamed, "I can't, and I just can't! I know you're going to hurt me, just like dad did!"

Santa just held me tight and did nothing but say, "I love you. I will never hurt you, as if I was his daughter. Repeatedly, until I felt his love radiate to the deepest part of my soul, where my injured spirit dwelled.

Slowly I began to relax and I realized that he was a man, and wasn't hurting me. It was then I felt the magic of Christmas surge through my body. I don't know how he did it, but I felt a peace come over me that I never felt before.

It was then I asked Santa, "Is this a dream, or am I talking in my sleep? You know, I do that sometimes, I wouldn't want mom to hear me, she'd think I have lost my mind."

Santa laughed and his stomach shook like a bowl full of jello, "No, this is not a dream and you're not imaging things. We are in your room sitting on your bed talking, and I'm holding you like a hurt child. You are the only one who can hear this conversation. Mom and Bryan will sleep soundly until the sun comes up in the morning."

His last words to me were, "Remember the magic."

The next thing I knew, was when I woke up when Bryan came bouncing in my room. He was tugging at my arm and shouting, "Sis, wake up! Santa's been here, you gotta see all the presents under the tree!"

I sat up in bed, rubbed my eyes, and told myself, 'It was only a dream, there is no Santa Claus.'

I then looked at Bryan and shouted, "I'm up, quit pulling on my arm will you!"

He ran out of the room. I grabbed my robe, put on my slippers and shuffled out of my room toward the Christmas tree. As I passed mom's room Bryan was tugging on her arm too, trying to get her to hurry and go look at the tree too.

I entered the room, mom followed with Bryan pulling her by the hand. He then jumped up and down clapped his hand and shrieked, "Told yah, there was a Santa Claus!"

When I looked over at the tree I gasped, it was not a scraggly ole tree with just a few presents under it. It was full beautiful tree with more lights and ornaments that I'd ever seen.

It was then I felt mom grab my arm and yell. When I looked at her, she had a confused look about her and tears steaming down her face.

I just hugged her close and whispered, "There is true magic in the air at Christmas!"

Neither of us said anything else as we headed toward the tree to open our presents. When the last item was unwrapped and Bryan was playing with his new toys, mom and I headed toward the kitchen to fix breakfast.

As I gathered the dishes to set the table, mom headed for the refrigerator. I heard her scream and when I looked the door was open and she was passed out on the floor.

I hurried to her side and made sure she was okay. I then looked up at the open door to see what frightened her. There inside the fridge was more food than I remembered being since last night. There was a big ham, milk, fruit, vegetables, eggs, bacon, and all sorts of Christmas cookies.

Again I wondered if Santa brought all this stuff too, but quickly brushed the thought from my mind as it was Christmas and anything can happen. It was then we I heard someone knock on the door.

Mom went to answer it and all I could hear was someone talking to her. After a few minutes, she came back into the room beaming from ear to ear and shaking so bad she had to sit down at the kitchen table.

She looked up at me and said, "Go get Bryan I have something marvelous to tell you both."

I went into the other room to get Bryan wondering what news mom had to tell us. When I told him mom had something to tell us both, he said, he was too busy playing with his new toy. However, I convinced him that he could bring it with him to the kitchen.

The two of us walked into the kitchen. I sat down and mom told Bryan to just be quiet and listen.

She placed an envelope on the table and said, "I bet you can't guess what that is?"

I didn't have the foggiest idea and with a sarcastic tone said, "What is it a Christmas bonus? Maybe it's a card from dad?"

She smiled and said, "No, you're not even close."

I frowned and said, "Well spit it out and don't keep us in suspense."

She slowly spoke making sure she chose her words just right and said, "You won't believe it, but that was a messenger from your dad's office."

Bryan sat up and beamed, "Is daddy coming for dinner mom?"

She smiled and flashed us a mischievous smile, "No Bryan, he won't be coming to dinner." She then looked at me and hinted, "Amanda this is ever better than him coming to dinner."

I then sat up and took notice and asked, "Better huh, has the magic of Christmas melted Scrooge's heart."

Mom's eyes light up and she shrieked, "Yes!" She then tore open the envelope and with tear filled eyes said, "It a check for fifty thousand dollars, money he should of paid me when we divorced!"

Bryan, got out up off the floor, walked over to mom, hugged her, and shouted, "Whoooohooo, now we're rich!"

I got up went over to her, hugged her, kissed her cheek, and whispered, "The magic of Christmas has performed a miracle."

It was then I heard Santa's jolly laugh, as his last words echoed inside my head "Remember the Magic."