Say a Prayer Ch. 04

Danetta still wasn't sure, but she held hope, and that's why she was so happy as she sat on a blanket, on grass, beside her loving husband. They watched their three children play in a park, carefully observing in case they needed to intervene.

She had to be sure before she told Erdgar. He wanted another child so badly. Not only that, he often told her in secret how lovely she was when pregnant, and when her breasts swelled up in preparation for breastfeeding he normally turned delightfully mad in private.

And... of course... those activities normally led to something more vigorous, except for early on in each child's life, when her body needed to heal from giving birth. But once all that was done, Erdgar would want more attention. Even when there was some leaking, he would still be crazed, sometimes even more so.

All these thoughts and memories had Danetta occasionally shivering as she leaned against Erdgar's body, her fingertips sliding between the buttons of his waistcoat. She forgot that she was meant to watch the children, but that was probably fine. Erdgar was there, and Andreo was a responsible lad. Nothing bad would happen. Danetta was completely free to close her eyes and relax.

"Hm? Are you weary, Darling?"

She rubbed his coat's sleeve with her cheek. "I don't believe so."

In all honesty, she was relaxed, but she didn't think she could sleep.

Some time later, Erdgar indulged her by stopping by the Lotus Shell on the way home. She had wanted to pray a little bit. She also thought it would be be nice to have one of the Children of Hope entertain the boys with music or word games. The boys' energy had been spent on their play, so it wouldn't be difficult to keep them in one place.

Erdgar was waiting on her when she finished, standing outside the door with a patient smile. Danetta laced her white fingers into his larger ones.

And as they took a step or two, they heard a conversation in one of the prayer rooms.

"The good Duchess Adurant?! Yesterday?!"

The couple halted, mild bewilderment shifting their features.

"I wouldn't lie to you, would I?"

"With that masked man?"

"I heard the moaning. She was wild."

"Right in a prayer room, eh? Not a hint of shame. Do you suppose the masked man was her husband? He was once known for hiding his face."

"I suppose that's a fair assumption, but why would he wear his mask again after all these years?"

"I don't know! Were they playing a game?"

Vomit bubbled up in Danetta's throat. Her eyes screwed shut. Her palm made an attempt at sealing her mouth, but it wasn't needed. She forced the vomit back. She opened her eyes.

Erdgar's face was more emotionless than the mask he once wore.

For a few seconds, Danetta didn't believe her heart existed, because her chest felt cold and hollow.

His fingers loosened. He left her. He took a brisk pace. He didn't look back at her. He only went to the boys and very curtly, very sharply, told them that they needed to leave. The boys were obedient, as was expected.

Erdgar still wouldn't look at her.

Even as he led the boys out of the temple, even as Danetta scurried to keep up with him, Erdgar wouldn't look at her. He didn't slow down. He didn't touch her. He didn't address her.

Inside the carriage, the boys sat on one side. The couple took the other.

Erdgar was determined to stare out of the window on his side, the skin of his neck folding and stretching unpleasantly. Amalric seemed to notice that something was wrong. He tried to start a conversation.

"Hey, hey Papa!" His tiny hands slapped his knees. His feet dangled off the cushioned bench. "Do you like violins, Papa? I like them. They make funny weee weeeeeee sounds, like it's singing, like a real person."

The father's voice was nowhere near as loving as it often was. "Be quiet, Sunny."

That was enough to convince Amalric to close his mouth.

Andreo was quiet, as he often was. He didn't notice anything was wrong. Danetta could tell by the peaceful look on his face. Roland was starting to doze off.

And Danetta was doing everything in her power to not burst into tears.

When they were at the townhouse, Erdgar was still fuming in silence, but he made sure that the boys were well under the dutiful eyes of the governess and the nanny before he stomped up the staircase with obvious outrage bubbling in his form. Danetta held up part of her skirts so she wouldn't trip as she rushed behind him. She called his name, understanding that now that her husband was out of the boys' sight, he would soon explode. If she could somehow disarm him, then she might be able to explain herself.

"Don't assume that seductive words can soothe me, Woman!"

She paused, cringing, her free hand still on the polished railing. She thought she saw the demure heads of her handmaidens peek out and down from the second floor, but when they noticed their mistress' doleful expression they straightened up and turned as calm as palace guards.

Something was churning in Danetta's belly. She didn't know what it was at first. But, when she saw Erdgar's shoe clack onto the second floor, and she heard him hiss out a violent curse, she realized what she was feeling.

Indignation.

Three, she had given him three boys who looked like him before his scars, at least according to him. Three! She had more than proven herself to be a loyal wife, a gentle wife, and he was going to completely ignore that?!

She forgot about disarming him.

Danetta wasn't thinking, wasn't thinking at all, as her face heated and her fingers tightly curled around the railing. She hollered up to her husband, "Are you going to ignore your own advice concerning gossip, Your Grace?!"

He stopped. He turned around. His eyes shot rage down at her pink face. His already twisted looking lips seemed even worse as he yelled with his great voice, "HOW DARE YOU?!"

Despite the flash of fear that ran through her spine, Danetta took in a short yet helpful breath and responded with a piercing, high pitched, "No, Sir!! HOW DARE YOU?! You've always told me that rumors are rumors and nothing more, and I should never care for them!! You've become an acrid hypocrite!!"

Erdgar cut through the air with his cane, making a whishing noise. Danetta's eyelids twitched because the end of the cane swiped a few inches away from her head. She knew he wasn't thinking of that. He wasn't trying to hurt her. That didn't mean he was in the right.

"Ungrateful vamp!!" He actually tossed the cane over the staircase. It bounced around the second floor, knocking a vase full of rainbow roses off of a decorative little table. The delicate porcelain shattered. Water splashed and became puddles on the floor. The roses became little refugees scattered all around. Then Erdgar turned around and went off to his bedroom.

Danetta tried to follow. When she was on the second floor, reaching out towards his back, she cried out, "Wait!! Wait!! We must discuss this!!"

His arm rose as he made an impatient gesture, unwilling to listen to her. He ran up more sets of stairs to the highest floor, and then to his bedroom. He slammed the door as he hid himself. Danetta heard the clanging noise of his lock. Her skirts flapped and waved as she ran to that door, and she pounded her small fists against the thick wood that separated her from the man. Despite all the noise, she heard her handmaidens' shoes tapping as they hurried to their mistress' bedroom door.

"Erdgar!! Erdgar!! Are you having an outburst?!" The rumbling, crashing sounds of furniture being dragged and tossed told her that he certainly was. She stomped her high heeled shoe onto the floor. "You hot-tempered thing!! Once you've grasped reality, you'll have a room's worth of furniture to replace and a wife to apologize to!!"

She was furious. She was, but when she went across the hall to face her handmaidens, metaphorical cracks formed in her anger, and agony shone through. Tears came, and her nose was rapidly clogged.

Weeping, a hand at her face, Danetta went to her bedchamber, and she stayed there for the rest of the day, and even into the night. The handmaidens tried to comfort her, but there was no success for them.

Eventually, Erdgar stopped throwing things, but he put himself in a similar mood, refusing to come out. Throughout the day and night, he was mostly quiet, but on occasion, he'd go right back to violent anger, and he'd throw something again, startling everyone in the house.

***

Delma Abnelon was one of the people who heard about the rumor. She couldn't help but hear it. So, she asked around for the location of the Adurant's townhouse. Then she hurried there.

There was no damn way she was going to let someone suffer because of her own lack of control.

The morning was rather cool when she arrived. Her throat ached as she knocked on the front door of the large house. A butler answered the door with a snobby expression, like he was meeting a thief. She begged to see the master, but the butler insisted that since she was a stranger, and it was very rude to appear unannounced, the master wouldn't make time for her, and neither would the mistress.

Rejected, pouting, Delma stalked back and forth on the footpath beside the road.

A breaking noise frightened her. Her feet stopped on the sidewalk. A pain dashed through her ears, as if she was witnessing a fireworks display. Her eyes closed for a moment as her hands clapped onto her ears.

A voice, it seemed to be high up. "Oh! Are you injured?!"

First, Delma opened her eyes and looked at the sidewalk. There were pieces of glass all around and a single, strong table on the pavement at an odd angle. Second, her eyes rose and her hands lowered. A man's marred, splotchy head was looking down at her from the highest floor.

"Miss?!" he shouted down to her. "I asked, are you injured?!"

Quite a handful of people stopped their walking as they noticed the scene, and so, Delma chose to explain the reason behind her appearance with a certain amount of vagueness. She put her hand beside her lips, hoping to direct her voice, and she said to the man, "I'm fine, Your Grace, but if you don't mind, would you please give me some of your moments?!"

The man who was obviously the duke blinked down at her. "Are you that priestess my wife chatted with at the Fighting Hall?!"

"Yes, Your Grace! I need to speak with you! Please! It's extremely important!"

A short, quiet moment clouded up around them as the passers-by eventually lost interest. Delma nervously tugged on the tiny cuffs of her sleeves.

"I suppose it can't hurt," Duke Adurant said. "Very well. Go to the door. The butler will let you in soon."

She was let into the house within two minutes. The butler led her to a drawing room that had very well made paintings hanging on the walls. Her favorite one was an image of two small boys, young enough to still be in dresses, with a toys in their hands. Delma sat on a comfortable chair and patiently waited.

Duke Erdgar Adurant soon emerged, dressed rather plainly, but a very nice cane was hanging from one of his waistcoat's buttons. He removed this cane, gripping the silver handle with his large, scarred hand. Delma rose for a moment to curtsy. The aristocrat gave a responding bow, and then he told her to sit back down. As he took his own seat before his guest, his long legs spreading out, he asked, "What is it we need to discuss, Miss?"

A deep, deep inhale, a soothing exhale, and Delma gave him the vital information with as much delicacy as possible. "Please don't be alarmed, Your Grace, please don't. I recently heard an unforgiving sort of rumor in the Lotus Shell, and I knew that it was false."

His cane tapped onto a rug. "You know it was false?" His hairless brow had been very stern up until then, but after she had said the rumor was false his brow rose.

She nodded. "Yes, Your Grace. The rumor is that... well... that a certain married woman was seen with a masked man, and that she had apparently been... expressing certain... amorous emotions in a prayer room." Delma licked a corner of her lips. Then she sighed, looking down at her skirt. "Whether or not this married woman was seen with the masked man, I can't rightly say, but I know for a fact that she was not the woman crying out in the prayer room. I know, because that woman was me."

Mucus gathered in her throat. She gulped it down.

The voice of the house's master was like a baby's little foot, delicate, gentle, and twitchy. "Oh. I... Oh."

"Should I... should I leave you now?" Delma asked, uncertain of what else to do.

"Well... I... at least let me give you my card."

Before she left the townhouse, the duke handed her a calling card so that it would be easier for her to visit in the future. It was something of a compliment. Having an aristocrat's calling card was almost a bragging right.

"I wouldn't mind if you became my wife's friend," Duke Adurant told her.

Delma didn't know if she had time for that.

***

Danetta heard activity outside the house, including some breaking glass, but she didn't leave her bedchamber. She merely sniffed and sighed, working on a bit of needlework, as she sat up in her bed. Her handmaidens sat near her, doing their own needlework, but also remaining alert in case their mistress needed anything.

Erdgar was having another fit, she thought. He was even yelling at someone on the street, she assumed. When she heard voices outside, she didn't pay attention. Her window and thick curtains muffled the exact words anyway.

She cringed, feeling pity for whoever was the target of Erdgar's apparent rage.

Then, it was quiet, aside from Erdgar's bedroom door opening and closing and then footsteps down the hall.

Danetta's needle paused in the air and she waited. A few minutes went by, and she decided to continue, her needle's point slipping into the fabric.

Then... she thought she heard the family carriage being taken to the street. She threw her needlework aside and jumped out of bed, surprising the handmaidens. Danetta ignored them and went to her window, pulling the curtains just so she could peek a bit.

Erdgar went into the carriage alone, and when the carriage left, Danetta remembered that they were supposed to go to the Auction Hall today.

But... what if he wasn't going there? What if, since he believed that he had a disloyal wife, he also believed there was no reason not to go to the nicest brothel in the city and find a pretty prostitute to moisten up his manhood?

That thought put her in another state of tears.

When lunch was ready, the handmaidens brought food to Danetta's bedroom. They ate with her, but they didn't bother starting a conversation. Both seemed to understand that they couldn't brighten the atmosphere.

Dinner was much the same, except for the darker sky.

It was night when the family carriage returned to the townhouse. Danetta noted that another carriage arrived soon after, and then she wondered if Erdgar went to the Auction Hall after all, since he had already paid the fee. When she saw a few men start to take furniture and packages from the second carriage, Danetta sighed and wondered how much of Erdgar's shopping budget was spent on coddling a whore.

He was a generous person. He'd probably place a fine piece of jewelry on top of a whore's fee if she was respectful.

What an odd compliment to give her husband!

Danetta pouted as she went back to her bed. She laid down on her side, took a pillow into her arms, and used it to muffle her wailing. Her handmaidens had put bits of cotton in their ears a while ago. It was probably the healthiest option for them.

Time went on this way until Danetta exhausted herself. One of the handmaidens got a cup of water for her. After she had emptied the cup, a rapping was heard on her door. Rather weakly, Danetta said, "Who is it?"

"It's your husband. Would you please let me come in?"

Her toes pressed together. Her stomach clenched into itself. She put her cup on a nightstand and said, "Yes, Sir." She found her key and handed it to one of the handmaidens. Then, as the two women walked to the door, Danetta straightened back into a sitting position, her blanket over her lap, her pillow behind her back.

One of the handmaidens unlocked the door, and they left the key on a side table. They opened the door, let the master inside, and swiftly left the couple alone, closing the door behind themselves.

He looked so glorious that it hurt to stare at him. His coat was a bright yellow adorned with a pattern of blue hydrangea flowers and tiny silver scissors seeming to cut the flowers' dark green stems. He even had a charming, triangular hat. Meanwhile, Danetta had changed into a simple robe with white and pale gray stripes. Underneath, there were her chemise and stays. She sighed and folded her hands together over the blanket, knowing her face was bare and her eyes must be pink.

Erdgar spoke with a jaunty tone. She didn't expect it. Her eyebrows lowered as she listened to him. "Good evening, Madam. Are you feeling well?" He put his hat on the side table, next to the key.

The index and thumb of one of her hands pinched at the knuckles of the other. "I don't know why you're asking such a question."

"I'm concerned, Danetta, terribly concerned." He walked towards and then around the bed, his hands behind his back, gently smiling. "I've been an incredible ass."

Danetta's eyes broadened. Her shoulders quirked. "Did you call yourself... well... my goodness." Hope and relief exploded in her mind. She shoved her blanket away and put her bare feet in a pair of casual, flat slippers.

Erdgar was close to her then, and his warmth was already stimulating her. "A woman visited me today, and she told me something very helpful."

Growing happier and happier with each second, Danetta shyly put her arms around herself and turned her head, giving her shoulder a pleased expression. "What were you told?"

"She told me she was the one having a certain moment in a prayer room, and that means you are completely innocent."

Her nose crinkled and her fingers flexed over her arms. "Were you surprised to hear that?"

"No, I was surprised at myself, and now I'm surprised at how much money I spent at the Auction Hall. I had broken too many things, you see."

"You'll have to call someone to repair your window, too." She looked up at him and intentionally made a childish face, her lips pouting in an exaggerated way. "You need to apologize to your wife."

"I know." He looked like he wanted to laugh.

And so, he told her he was sorry, over and over, hugging and kissing her.

***

"Oh, Mr. Kuno! I haven't seen you in a while!"

It was another ordinary morning in a prayer room. Delma was very happy to see this masked man. He had a bundle of cloth in one arm, possibly a gift. He bowed to her after she curtsied. Then he said, "I've been busy, but I have an offering for you."

She reached out and took the bundle. "How kind of you." When she unwrapped the package, she found several onion stalks tied together. "Oh Sir, these will be very useful the next time I make a pot of soup." She folded the cloth back into a tight state. "You've been so lovely to me, so very lovely." Her boots scraped the floor a bit as she put the bundle aside. "Have you been well?"

"As well as I can be," Mr. Kuno said, shuffling his feet a little. His gloved hands were layered before himself. His covered head was lowered. He seemed... timid.

Delma walked up to him. She leaned in slightly, putting her palms up to his arms, right above his elbows. His head tilted and lowered as if in surprise. She told him, "I've wondered, Mr. Kuno, if you'd ever show me your face."

"Hmmm? I don't know yet."