Sex, Drugs, and Princeton Ch. 02

"You alright?" Travis asked as he finished his ice cream.

"Yup," Brett lied as he finished his too.

"Sure you don't want to shower?" Travis said with a smile and motioning toward his lover's cum covered torso.

"Well, now I do," the joking was helping Brett feel normal again, "But I don't want to wake up the whole house. I'll shower first thing tomorrow."

"OK, B," Brett loved when he called him that, "Well, g'night," Travis said as he curled into the little guest bed.

"You sleeping here too?"

"That ok?"

"Of course," Brett said as he slid into bed next to Travis. Travis's back was to him and at first Brett just got into the bed keeping some distance between their still naked bodies. Travis reached his right arm behind him, grabbed Brett's right arm and wrapped it around himself like a blanket, pulling their warm bodies together. They quickly fell asleep holding each other tightly, feeling the electricity of their new love pulsing through the space between them

************

Brett opened his eyes and for a few seconds felt totally disoriented. He'd forgotten where he was for a moment, and then it all started to flood back to him. He remembered that he was in Virginia in his new friend Travis's house, in the basement, in the guest room. He remembered that last night he and Travis had made their relationship a sexual one. It had been his first time with another man. His head swam with possibilities. He had no idea how this whole situation was going to pan out, but he did know one thing: he liked gay sex a lot.

As Brett became more oriented, he realized that Travis was not next to him in bed. He wondered to himself if it had all been a dream but then he realized that he was still naked and covered in their seed from the night before. As he scanned the unfamiliar room in the light of day, he noticed some things that he hadn't before. On the wall beside the door were a bunch of ribbons and medals acquired at gun club competitions. Someone in this house (or perhaps the whole family) sure did like to shoot guns. On the dresser on the opposite wall there was a framed photo of Travis and two of his brothers standing in the middle of a lake holding up a huge fish. Brett couldn't believe he was in a house like this and in love with a guy who lived in a house like this. Brett was a bona fide street kid. He'd been a latch key kid since he was 6, rode the city bus to school since 2nd grade, used to cut school to walk across the bridge to New York starting when he was 12, and left home when he was just 17 to crash with friends who had more lenient parents who allowed them to drink openly. While he knew that his mom and stepdad loved him, he'd never felt particularly part of a family, but had always felt alone - until he'd met Travis.

Brett stirred as he could faintly make out what sounded like raised voices coming from upstairs. He wrapped himself in a sheet and quietly made his way to the door of the guest room and opened it a crack. Now he could make out that the voices were those of Travis and his father. They were having a heated discussion, but Brett couldn't make out what was being said. After straining to try to make sense of the conversation for a few moments, Brett heard a loud thud and then the voices fell silent. He heard the door at the top of the basement steps open and he quickly hopped back into bed and pretended to be asleep turning his back to the door. His heart was pounding. Within seconds Travis stood over him.

"Brett, wake up," he said.

"Huh?" Brett faked sleepiness.

"We're leaving early," Travis said, "I gotta get out of here."

Brett turned to look at his friend and could see that the light in his eyes had dimmed. "Are you alright?"

"No, but I'm gonna be as soon as we get on the road." Brett worried that Travis's parents had heard them last night, but didn't dare speak his fear aloud. He also worried that someone in this house full of gun-loving folks had been shot, or was thinking about shooting someone.

"Sorry, B," Travis softened, "I'll help you pack." The two of them hastily gathered clothes and toiletries into Brett's backpack and then Brett threw on a fresh pair of clothes. Brett was nearly shaking now. What was the rush? Why did they have to get out of there? Travis led the way as they climbed the basement stairs that led to the kitchen. Travis's parents were both standing at the kitchen counter smiling. Brett was relieved that no one had been shot and was surprised to find that both of them were still exceedingly kind. He expected to walk into the middle of a huge family fight. Instead, his parents reiterated how lovely it had been to have him in their home and wished them a safe trip back to school. Travis's mom even offered him a warm hug as they made their way toward the front door. Brett was more confused than ever.

"What was all that about, Travis?" Brett asked as they made their way down the driveway.

"Would you just shut up and get in the car!" Travis barked, clearly not in the mood.

They got in the car and started to speed away and drove in silence for the 20 minutes it took to get back to the interstate. Brett felt hurt. Travis had never spoken to him like that. He'd never felt as close to anyone before as he felt with Travis last night in the guest bedroom, and now it felt like his entire world was falling apart. He stared out the window as farmland rolled past and tried hard not to cry. Travis just drove quickly and steadily away from his parents' house. It looked to Brett like he was on a mission. After they got onto the interstate and drove for about 10 miles they approached a rest area, Travis pulled all the way into the right lane and exited traffic. He found a parking spot far away from all of the other travelers, brought the car to a stop, and threw his head back against the head rest with his face pointing up toward the heavens. Brett had been too scared to look directly at Travis until now, but he turned his head and realized that Travis was crying. Brett was an only child, had had two fairly aloof parents, and was not very good at dealing with emotions, especially not someone else's. But he knew he loved Travis with all his heart and had to do something.

"Trav," Brett spoke softly, "Talk to me."

"I can't," he paused, "Not this."

"Did they hear us last night?" Brett got the courage to ask.

"I don't think so," Travis said, "Maybe...I don't know."

"Whatever it is, we'll figure it out. Trust me."

Travis finally turned to look at Brett, his eyes red with tears. "I woke up early this morning. I wanted to get outside and breathe some fresh air and walk the dog before anyone was up. It's always so peaceful out here and I missed the quiet. And after last night, I felt so happy. You made me so happy," Travis smiled through tears. "When I got home a half hour later my dad was waiting for me in the kitchen." Travis's voice started to waiver. "He told me to sit down on the couch and he asked me point blank if I was a fag."

"What?" Brett exclaimed. "He just came out and asked you that?"

"Yeah. He looked so angry and disappointed in me."

"What did you say to him?"

"I said I wasn't one, I mean, a fag. Of course. But I don't know if he believed me."

"Why would he ask you that?" Brett wondered.

"That's the worst part. He said he didn't like that we were spending so much time together. He thought, he thought..." Travis looked pained but finally finished the sentence, "that hanging out with someone like you would make me gay."

Brett was stunned and there was a long silence until Travis continued. "He's been angry ever since I quit ROTC. Apparently he had an old buddy of his who lives up near school follow me, well...us, around a bit. He told my dad that basically I spent every waking minute either in class or with you." Travis's anger swelled, "That fuckin' bastard. I could've killed him. He said that he was going to make me switch rooms, and wanted me to stop hanging around you." Brett couldn't believe what he was hearing. He'd gone from the happiest moment of his life less than 12 hours ago to a feeling of utter confusion and despair. He couldn't bear the thought of not having Travis in his life. And the thought of facing the dog-eat-dog world at Princeton without his best friend made him so afraid. Travis saw the look of worry come over his face and quickly added, "But I told him that there was no fuckin' way I was going through with it. I told him that he couldn't pick my friends for me."

Brett's heart warmed again as he heard this. During the lull in the conversation he added, "Wow, I don't know what to say. I'm sorry."

Travis said, "You don't have to be sorry. I'm sorry to get you involved in this mess."

"So what happens now?"

"I was getting to that," Travis said, "This is the best part," he added sarcastically. "Dad said that either he was pulling me out of school or I was going to have to join this stupid fraternity that he was a member of in college. He said that it's good for networking and I'll meet some normal friends."

"So you're gonna join it?"

"I have no choice. Plus I'm sure dad's spy is still going to be watching. I'm so sorry, B. I know we think those fraternities are stupid, and I know we may have to be more discreet about our time together, but I don't see any other way."

Brett was so sad. He was sad for Travis's family that they couldn't accept him for who he was. He was sad for Travis that because of his family's attitudes toward being gay, that he might not be able to accept himself for who he was. He was sad for himself, that this man he loved was in so much pain. And he was sad for their budding love, because there would apparently be so many obstacles. Brett did the only thing he could imagine doing, he put his arm around Travis and pulled him closer so that his head rested on his shoulder. They stayed that way for a while in an intimate silence, the same intimate silence that would become the hallmark of their friendship from now on. Eventually, Travis broke the silence and looked straight into Brett's eyes with a piercing gaze and said, "No one can know." Then he put the car in reverse, backed out, and pointed the car toward Princeton and the future.