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Gina half turned and rested her forehead on the point of my shoulder. Her voice was so small I could hardly hear her words above the pounding of the surf.
“Jonathon…that morning last weekend, we shared something really special…”
“Today was…”
“No, please, “ Gina raised her downcast eyes and pressed her fingertips to my lips. “Please let me finish…” She rested her forehead back on my shoulder and took hold of my hand. She played with my fingers as she spoke, “I…I…you could say that I have been something of a whore. I have slept with…oh…I don’t know…thirty-five or forty different guys…and a few girls…not many girls.
“Sometimes I took a succession of men, one after the other, sometimes two at once…sucking one while the other one screwed me. I’ve even slept with my own father. You know I didn’t do anal until last weekend…and you are still the only one. I guess you can say that has been my only saving grace.
“If you ask me why I screwed your ass yesterday, the answer would be ‘to let you know what it feels like if you ever wanted to have mine again’…not a message ‘never again’…just background information.
“And, if you ask me why I did all the other stuff, I could only tell you that I just love sex! I didn’t really consider what I was doing…just having a good time…
“You should also know that I’ve done drugs…grass, coke, fantasy, LSD, speed…all of the ‘soft’ ones…no heroin though…and I am not a user…I suppose sex is my drug of choice!
“I’ve had the clap twice and chlamydia once, but nothing more serious. I had an HIV scare once, but nothing came of it. Don’t tell me I’ve been lucky, I know it!
“Why am I telling you all this?
“Last weekend you and I made magic, it was amazing. I had never felt anything that beautiful before. It was more wonderful than I ever imagined possible. It changed my whole way of thinking…about me and about my body. I want to change the way I am...who I am
“Jonathon, if you are willing, I want us to recapture that feeling, again and again.”
I put my arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, “Do I hear you saying that you want us to become an ‘item’?”
“Only if it’s cool with you.”
I examined my feelings. Physical: elevated heart rate, sweaty palms, rapid breathing. Mental: Excited? Fearful? Happy? I couldn’t quite place a finger on it. How did I feel about Gina and what she had just told me? The experimenting with drugs? No problem! What young person hasn’t, especially grass. What about the thirty-five or forty men? Average, let’s say, 10 encounters per man, made three-fifty to four hundred events. Is this any different to Gina having had sex that many times with one long-time lover? At least there had been no deep attachments to muddy the waters. Then there was the way she butt-fucked me; where did that fit?
Through all this I heard myself saying, “How do you see it happening?”
“You are looking for an apartment, right? Well, I have my own money, we could share.”
“Live together?”
“Yes…”
“What about your father? How will he react to you living in a permanent relationship with a black…”
“Oh, Jonathon! He likes you! He likes you a lot! And he suspects that I am up to something like this. That’s why he stayed in New York this weekend, to give me free rein, and take any pressure you might feel from him being around off you.”
“And Harriet?”
“She’ll not give a damn…except maybe at ‘losing’ you, or more accurately, that one thing about you she finds most attractive. No prize for guessing what that is!
“She’ll never want to change her life either. Not ever! She is too deep into being bi and getting the absolute maximum out of both worlds. And you saw how she enjoyed playing the dominatrix part yesterday…that’s something new in her in the last couple of months. Plus, of course, there’s daddy; you have no idea of how much she adores him!”
I pulled Gina to me and rested my head on hers, “Ok then, let’s give it a try…”
Lost in our own thoughts, Gina and I sat close and watched the booming surf until the purple shadows lengthened and the air chilled as the sun went down. Then, hand in hand, we made our way into our new life together.
How will it turn out? We do not know. We are still learning.
