She

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She reflects on fetish party.
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It's a rainy Sunday morning in Summer. One of those dull days with drizzle coming down that threatens to not stop all day. I wake up late. The party last night was a blast, and we didn't get home until early this morning. I lay there and reflect on my impressions of the event.

It was one of those fetish parties with many odd people to see and talk to. Gays and dames in leather outfits, slaves with their Masters or Mistresses, swingers looking for some exchange. There were several shows throughout the night, bondage, erotic, gays, and one initiation of a very young slave girl. And then, just before the party was over, there was a slave auction.

You had taken me there. I hadn't known where we were going. The only thing I knew was that you wanted me shaved and dressed in a very kinky outfit with a skirt that was so short that you actually couldn't call it a skirt. I was not to wear any underwear. Before we left you applied the golden tag to my pussy ring that would tell everyone getting close to me that this cunt was your very own property.

I felt a little awkward walking around like this. The tag would make a very soft but audible jingle with every step and I felt very exposed to the view of anyone around. But I felt you content and proud of me, and that was all I needed to be comfortable.

Before we entered the building where the party took place you fixed the black leather collar around my neck and applied the thin chain to it. I hadn't worn this in years and never in public, so I was shocked and I felt embarrassed about anyone seeing me like that. I could tell that you were enjoying the emotions pictured on my face: insecurity, anxiety, fear. A couple walked by on the sideway and they couldn't take their stare off this strange woman with the leather collar and the chain. I wished the ground would just open beneath my feet and I could disappear from their view. But you only pulled slightly on the chain and made me follow you through the main door into the building. It was dark inside. I felt anxious as I followed you through another door into the actual party room. It was a large room with small tables, some placed around some kind of center stage, some at the walls, in form of little séparés. The lights were dim and I could see people taking drinks, smoking, watching others, talking and laughing. You led me to a bar in one corner of the room and ordered us some drinks. You pulled a bar stool over for me to sit on. I was to sit on it facing the room, with my legs open for people to see my shaved lips and my tag, while the direct view on my cunt was even more faciliated for everyone since I was sitting elevated on a bar stool. You stood next to me and held the end of the chain loosely in your hand. You didn't talk to me, just watched me in my agony. I could tell that you were getting aroused by the situation and I tried to not show my anxiety and embarrassment. In spite of the situation I felt myself getting wet with excitement.

The first shows started and I was glad that the attention of everyone was drawn to the stage. There were two gay men in leather outfits with chains and bare chests who dripped hot wax on each other's bodies, exchanged deep kisses, and in the end one of them took the other one's cock in his mouth after having taken one good sip from a champagne glass. Then there were some other shows that I couldn't really concentrate on anymore. The drinks I had taken were taking their toll and I had to pee badly. I tried to draw your attention to me to tell you I needed to go to the bathroom. You didn't turn around, but just told me that if I wanted anything I would have to get on my knees on the floor and ask you for it. I was shocked. I thought I would never be able to do this in front of all these people. I was used to being on my knees in front of you during our role games, but that was usually at home with nobody around. This was different. There were enough people around who were already very much interested in my exposed private parts. They would surely notice me getting on my knees, pleading you for permission to release my bladder. So I tried to stay seated and concentrated on clenching my muscles. That was almost impossible with my legs open. When you realized that I didn't intend to give up the fight against nature too soon, you made me stand next to you with my legs open and my hands behind my back. This way I could hold it for only some minutes before I knew that if I didn't get to a toilet soon, I would just have to let go right there and then.

I slowly got on my knees in front of you. I kept my eyes down to not see people watching this scene. 'Please, Master. Let me go to the toilet,' I murmured. 'I can't hear you. I think you need to speak up a little from down there.' 'Please', I said louder, 'Please, Master, let me go to the toilet'. I saw the feet of some guys standing next to us turn into my direction. I could feel their stares on me. By now my eyes were filled with tears, partly from the pain my full bladder was causing me, partly of embarrassment. You allowed me to get up and follow you to the restrooms. Without hesitating you chose the men's door and led me inside. There were two guys standing at the pissoirs and I could see them doing their business from the side. Neither of them bothered to cover up. It seemed that they were enjoying being watched. You turned towards me and pulled my skirt up to my waist before you led me into one of the stalls and closed the door only halfway. 'Sit down, but don't let go before I tell you to. Look into my eyes'. I sat down and now it really hurt to hold back. My eyes locked with yours. You put your hand between my legs and slowly pushed your finger between my lips and into my cunt. The same moment you told me to pee, your finger pressed forward into my bladder. I felt an intense sting of pain when the first gush finally left my aching body. Shivers and goosebumps ran down my arms and made my nipples get hard. It seemed ages before the flow finally subsided and then stopped all the way. You started to massage my clit with your thumb until you felt it getting hard. And just as I started to enjoy the feeling, you gave my clit a final hard pinch and drew your hand back. I felt empty and humiliated, being treated without the usual tenderness and care of my needs. You told me to turn around and bend over. With a casual movement you dried me off with a piece of paper and pulled my skirt down. This was one of the worst moments of the evening. I felt you very far away from me and I started to wonder if you had any feelings for me at all. I knew that there was my partner, my friend, my lover, somewhere inside you, but I could not feel him anywhere close. I wanted badly to just run away from there and hide from the world inside our bed, the place where you had treated me with tenderness so many times.

But I composed myself and decided to endure whatever else you had in mind for that night. I tried to find my own pleasure in this game, knowing that I could trust you and put myself into your hands.

We went back to the bar and I was again seated on the bar stool, facing the crowd around the stage, showing off your lips, your ring and tag. Some men would start talking to you once in a while, asking you about your slave, asking if they could touch me or use my service for their pleasure. But you would tell them that they could see me, but as long as the chain was in your hands they would not be allowed to touch me in any way.

The next hour should turn out to be pure agony.

The speaker announced the slave auction. He said that there was one nomination of a slave girl to be sold, and some nominations of slaves that could be bid on, to rent them for an hour in a separated room adjacent to the party room. You turned around and took a deep look into my eyes. I couldn't believe that you had actually put me out there for rent. I started begging you with my eyes to draw back, to take me home and stop all this. But you just turned back around towards the stage.

I was fighting my own private battle inside. I knew that I had my safeword and that if I told you this word everything would be over in just a minute. We would go home and I would be able to talk about my feelings with you. We would take this excursion as a chance to know each other better, to use the experience for further adventures into this world we both loved so much. But then I thought that I would not want to disappoint you by running away. I knew that I was safe with you. You knew my limits and you would not do anything that would go beyond them. This was just one of your games that would bring me very close to them. It excited you, and I knew that if I pleased you tonight, I would have my very own pleasure in your pride of me.

So I straightened my shoulders and waited for things to come. The speaker asked all the slaves free for bidding to be brought on the stage. I felt like in a slow-motion movie when you took the chain and led me up the few stairs onto the wooden platform. There were already some girls standing in a row, and you placed me at the left end, next to a tall blonde girl about my own age. Then you let go of your end of the chain and left the stage. I could see you walking back to my now empty bar stool to watch the scene. A man started to strip the first girl from her clothes. I could tell her embarrassment and shame when he took all her clothes away from her and left her standing naked in the lights. He continued with the other girls, and finally it was my turn. He pulled the zipper of my skirt. It was one of those zippers that went all the way from the bottom to the top, so when it was open, my skirt just fell off my hips. My top was buttoned all the way in the front. So all he needed to do was open all the buttons and slip the straps over my shoulders. I tried to focus my mind on something else, on something in my imaginary world. It worked a little but all the time I could feel eyes on my body like burning flames. The man came back with a thick black pen, and each of us was marked with a different number on her left thigh.

The bidding started quickly. They began with the girl that was stripped first. She was the one to be sold to a new Master. I was shocked about this. I hadn't known that this actually exists. To me it would be absolutely out of question to let anyone else decide on my life in such a way. The life I led was my own choice, I had my 'normal' life with my job and my friends, and I had this 'secret world' that I discovered and that I enjoyed with you, the man I loved. The girl was sold after about fifteen minutes to a tall silent guy with no expression on his face. I felt sorry for her when she followed him off the stage. She seemed broken and without any spirit. I decided to ask you more about this another time. I wanted to know your feelings and thoughts about this.

Now men were invited on the stage to test the merchandise. They would be able to touch us in any way they wanted, but only with their hands. I looked over to where you stood and for the second time this night my eyes locked with yours. I knew that watching me being humiliated in this way excited you very much, but I also knew that it would be hard for you to watch these strangers touching the most private parts of my body. So I looked at you and I tried to assure myself as much as you by finding strength in your eyes. This was something I did for you and me only. I loved you and I knew where I belonged and whom I wanted to be with. None of these men around me would be able to even get close to only touching any of my feelings. And anything that would happen to me that night I would do only for you.

A small fat guy came up on the stage. I could almost feel his cold sweaty fingers on me even before he touched me. He seemed to be interested in the tall blonde next to me, and I could see the disgust on her face. He ran his fingers over her tits, pinched here and there, touched her hips, her thighs. Then his hands wandered up her inner thighs and penetrated her cunt with one fast and fluent motion. I could see her body twitch of surprise. He kept his fingers inside of her for a while, as if to test how narrow she was. His thumb was torturing her clit as if he wanted to make her come right there. The speaker finally asked him to not continue and wait until he paid for this girl to get his share. He seemed really angry and turned towards me. I was afraid of this man now. He was furious and he turned his anger towards me. I couldn't protect myself. He told me to turn around and bend over. I was desperate and I tried to look at you, but I couldn't see you at the place you had been before. Could it be that you had just left me there on my own? He whirled me around and pushed my shoulders forward. I almost stumbled but tried to stay on my feet. As soon as I was bent over and my ass cheeks had parted a little, he used one hand to spread them and the index finger of the other one pushed into my tight hole. I had never felt so cheap, low and humiliated before. His hands felt like a butcher's feeling a piece of meat for its quality. Again he was stopped by the speaker, and he was told to return to his seat. I hoped he would not bid on me. When I got back into a standing position, I froze. You were standing next to me, facing the blonde. Your eyes were on me, and I knew that you had enjoyed watching the rough treatment I was receiving from the 'butcher'. Your hands ran gently over the blonde's body, and all the time you were looking straight into my eyes. My stomach started to twist when I saw that she was obviously enjoying your touch. Was this jealousy? If it was I never wanted to feel this again. There was a short moment of overflowing hate inside of me, and I could have killed anyone close to me then.

The speaker announced the start of the bidding and I exhaled with relief when you and all the other men stepped off the stage and back to the seats.

It seemed that the butcher was interested in the blonde. They started with her. I was to be second right after. He started right off with a pretty high amount. You went just a little higher. You were bidding on that blonde! There was this little smirk on your face. You seemed to be really having fun with this. I was fuming. I knew that you could tell with one look at me what I was going through. And you just kept torturing me by keeping that fat guy's pace in raising the amount to an unbelievable level. The guy was getting tentative with his words. He wouldn't go much higher. And then you stopped suddenly and he got this girl for an incredible sum. So you hadn't intended on having her at all. It was just a nice torture game you had been thinking of.

They started with me then. The fat guy was gone, you didn't even bother to raise your voice. It seemed like nobody was even interested in me. Then, from the very back of the room there was an offer. I couldn't see who it was, but I knew that I had heard that voice somewhere before. Nobody replied to his bid, so I was sold for rent for almost nothing. People in the audience started chucking and talking about me. Here I was, a cheap little slut nobody wanted to have. I felt crushed. My head down, I was not interested in the other girls anymore. I couldn't look at you. I was sure you would be very disappointed of me.

After a while everybody could go on stage and lead his girl for the evening away into one of the adjacent separate rooms provided for the girls to serve their temporary masters. My chain moved and I looked into the face of the tall guy who had bought the little slave girl who was sold first. I knew then where I had heard that voice before. He was a guy I used to work with at my former office. He had always made moves on me and I had never liked him. Then, one night at a coworker's party he had gotten too close and I had just poured my drink right over his face. I remember that he had been furious then, and that he had sworn revenge. I had laughed at him and asked him when he would dare take revenge on me....

To Be Continued...

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