Sheeple

Eric shoved the door and it opened. He took a quick tour of the house. Peeking in the one room he saw the children asleep. Gretchen saw him and started wagging her tail. He quickly left the room and headed down the hall. Kate's door was wide open. Luna was on the bed, snoring. Kate was asleep, curled up in a ball around her pillow. Sure that all was well, he turned to leave when he spied the rib bones on the dresser. He carefully took them off the dresser and headed down the hall.

*

In her sleep, Kate dreamed that Gretchen had come into her room. She half woke, wondering why she had. In the hall, she could have sworn she heard the click of nails against the wooden floor. Glancing over at the dresser where the clock was she saw it was 4:45am. Way too early to be up. Her head was almost back on the pillow when she realized what was wrong. The rib bones were gone! Gretchen must have been in the room. She made a note to check the puppy in the morning and fell back asleep.

*

Eric slipped back outside and took care of the bones. He retrieved the pile of clothes and headed back in the house. Slipping into the bathroom, he cleaned up as quietly as he could and then silently headed for the living room. He was relieved to see that the couch was empty. Curling up on the futon, he fell asleep quickly.

*

"Well, nice to see that you decided to spend the night," Kate said as she stood over Eric with a cup of tea and a plate. She had started talking to him from the end of the couch. David and her father had both been the type of men who startled easily from their sleep. Eric was a light sleeper and had nearly sat straight up when Kate spoke.

"Kate! You startled me!" Eric tried to compose himself. She was smiling and held out the cup and plate.

"It isn't chocolate cake, but will scrambled eggs and toast do?"

Eric took the food, smelled it and looked up. "Oh yes. It smells wonderful. Thank you Kate."

"Don't thank me till you've eaten. Who knows, I may have screwed up for once."She turned and left the room. It made Eric think of the comments her sons had made about her cooking last night. Her cooking must be good so much of the time that when she does mess up, it was memorable. Enough so that they teased her. Hmmmm...

Eric took a bite of the eggs. Bacon, onions, bell pepper, cheese and spices. He ate two more bites before he had a chance to think about anything else. Swallowing, he stood and grabbing his cup, headed for the kitchen. "Kate, this is wonderful."

She smiled. "You've just been without good cooking for too long. These are okay, but they were meant to be an omelet."

"Oh Mom, shush and take a compliment!" Andy said from behind his own plate. He was eating quickly.

Kate glanced back at him and stuck her tongue out. Andy returned the gesture. They both laughed. Eric was amused by the whole thing and didn't notice the whoosh of air that alerted Kate to the fact that the kids were barreling into the kitchen.

"What's for breakfast?" Jamie asked. "Are we having rabbit?"

Kate looked at Jamie with a puzzled expression on her face. "Now what on earth would make you think we were having rabbit for breakfast?"

"Well, Daddy went out last night, and he always brings us rabbits."

Kate was even more puzzled now and Andy was laughing while Eric tried to decide where to step into this conversation. Jamie in the mean time was looking into the skillet and when she saw nothing but scrambled eggs with lots of bits in them and cheese, she turned around to her dad.

"Daddy, where's the rabbit?" she asked in almost an accusatory tone.

"Sweetie, I didn't go hunting last night. I went for a run. No rabbits. So, you're just going to have scrambled eggs."

"Oh poo!" Then went over to where Bess and Mark were waiting at the kitchen table.

Kate decided to wait and ask Eric what that was all about until after the children had their breakfast. She plated out their food, handed them juice and grabbing her teacup, motioned for Eric to follow her. They stopped in the dining room and Kate turned to face Eric. "What on earth was that all about? I heard something about hunting last night too."

Eric took a deep breath and decided to continue with what he had said last night. "When we lived on the ranch, I'd go hunting at night after the kids went to bed. So, often there would be rabbits in the morning to have for breakfast."

Kate looked at him. He didn't seem to be lying, but he was just a bit nervous. She didn't understand why, but left it at that. "So, oh great rabbit hunter, do you plan to continue hunting rabbits around town?"

"Not if I can help it. I'd rather buy bacon from the store. Less mess, more meat."

Kate laughed and Eric joined her. He was relieved that this was over so easily.

"Oh.... meant to ask you later, but I'll do so now. Luna got into the trash last night and had some rib bones in my room. I put them on my dresser and figured that I'd throw them out this morning. However, Gretchen must have come in my room in the middle of the night and taken them. Have you seen any bone fragments anywhere?"

Eric stuck his hand in his pocket. "No, I haven't seen any bits laying about," he said as he fingered a piece at the bottom of his pocket. "I'll keep my eyes open for any though."

"Thank you Eric. Puppies are so stupid sometimes." She walked back into the kitchen. Eric followed her and sat his cup in the sink.

"I'd better be off. I have a job interview this morning out at the hospital."

"I'll give you a ride out there if you want," Andy said. "I'm headed that way myself."

"That would be fine," Eric answered. "Oh..... I forgot. Kate, can you watch the kids while I go for the interview? I forgot that I'd need a sitter."

"Go ahead. Only stop by the shelter and get a clean shirt. There's grease and barbecue sauce on that teeshirt of yours."

Eric looked down and saw that she was right. Damn. "Yes, I guess I'd better. Can we head out now Andy? I'm due there in about 45 minutes."

Andy downed his tea and grabbed his keys. "Let's go."

Eric turned to his children. "Behave for Kate. I'll be back in a bit. Love you both!" Eric turned as he finished and headed out the door.

*

Eric started working at the hospital that week. Computer data entry wasn't a great job, but it put money in his pocket. Plus, on the side he was starting to do a decent business in computer repair work. He had a sliding scale for payments that really helped garner clients. Word of mouth was a wonderful way to do business. After six weeks, he'd already made as much from repairs as he had working at the hospital.

Today he was suppose to be moving into an apartment about a block away from Kate's house. No more shelter. Suzanne and Kate had helped him get the place. It wasn't too shabby, and came furnished which was a real help. Most of their possessions were clothes. Eric had a few books, and the kids had a few toys and that was it. For once, he couldn't wait for work to be over.

"Hey there! You ready to go move into that apartment?" Zach said from the door.

"I sure am."

"Good, cause I have your stuff and the kids in the car with Anne."

Eric looked a bit panicked. "What? You packed all my stuff?"

"Yes. It wasn't that hard. I even got the stuff you had under the mattress."

"I... umm..." Eric tried not to be upset. "I... "

"Eric, it's okay. Nothings lost. I made sure I had everything and then asked Jamie if we'd missed anything. She's the one who showed me the stuff under the bed. She got it out and put it in the box, so just relax."

Eric took a deep breath. "Ok. Sorry. It's just that..."

"Don't worry. I understand. Remember, I have little brothers... who stole everything at one point or another. I'm not the snoopy type anyways."

Eric relaxed. He realized that Zach was honest and not out to get him. "Thanks. Let's go okay?" He stood and headed towards the door. The time clock was by the back entrance which Zach breezed out of ahead of him. Eric punched out and followed Zach.

*

They had most of the stuff up and in the apartment in less that twenty minutes. It helped having Zach there. Jamie and Mark were trying to put their clothes away when Zach came up to Eric.

"I have a question to ask you that Mom said you might be able to help with."

"Well, ask. I'll help if I can," Eric said.

"I feel a bit stupid asking, but...... I keep having these dreams where I'm a wolf. Or, at least I'm running with a wolf. Do you have any idea of what they could mean?"

Eric sat down. He thought long and hard about what to say. "Zach, I'm not sure. Tell me a bit more about them."

The two men talked for twenty minutes. Eric realized that Zach was having very intense realistic dreams. Ones that echoed things in his own realm of experience. "Zach, have you done any shamanic work?"

"No, but I've had fun with a friend of ours who is a shaman. He shifts."

Eric tried not to stiffen. "What do you mean by shifts?"

"Well, he goes to sleep and changes places with an animal on the astral plane. Or, he takes on the attributes of an animal, and you can't hear him or see him at night. Freaked me out the first time he did that. And, Mom swears that he slept across the foot of her bed when Dad died. Stayed there almost every night for a week to keep an eye on her."

Eric nodded. He was trying to buy some time as he wasn't sure where to go next with this. "Zach, it could be that you are just tapping into some of that same energy that your friend does. Or, you could be astrally traveling with a real lycanthrope."

"Real lycanthrope? What do you mean?"

"There are people who really do become wolves or bears or even cats. They shift on more than just the astral plain."

Zach took a moment to let his words sink in. "So, you're saying that there really are werewolves, and that might be who I'm visiting on the astral?"

"It's one possibility. Or, you could be tapping into the lives of real wolves."

"Ok. So, how am I to know which this is?"

"I'm not certain. You probably aught to keep a dream diary and see what you can match up from your dreams. Like if you see any areas in your dreams that you recognize. Mountains, rocks, etc."

"That sounds logical. Thanks. Oh, and before I forget, Mom says come over for dinner. There's chocolate cake too."

Eric took about thirty seconds to decide. "We'll be there as soon as the kids get done."

"Ok, see you in a few minutes." Zach called back over his shoulder.

*

"Dinner was great Kate." Eric put his plate in the sink.

"Glad you liked it." She she sat down next to him. "You know, I've missed seeing you at the shelter."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, you know how you get use to seeing people, and then when they're gone, it makes a difference."

Zach walked in the room about then, having heard part of the conversation. "Mom, why don't you just say you missed Eric? Wouldn't that be easier?"

Kate went red in the face. "Zach, you have no tact!"

"Yeah, and you have no life outside of work. Get a life!"

Eric decided to study the dishes in the drain. No way he was stepping into this conversation. Not that he didn't find Kate attractive, because he did. However, he didn't know if he was ready for anything in his life besides his two kids. He still felt like he was walking on tenter hooks with everyone in town.

"Eric, you could say something you know!" Kate was exasperated.

"I... umm... I think I'd better go check on the kids." He got up and headed for the dining room.

Kate watched him go and wasn't sure if she should be mad at Zach or Eric. She sighed deeply and turned back to Zach.

"Mom, you know how you always told us kids when we were really screwing up our lives?"

"Yes." She wondered where he'd take this.

"Well, take it from me, I think you are screwing up your life. Stop mourning, and get on with living. Its been over four years. Dad wouldn't have wanted you to be a dried up old biddy."

"Zach!"

"Mom!"

"Oh! You are impossible sometimes." She got up to do the dishes and hoped that Zach would disappear.

"Mom, Zach's right. Get a life," Andy said as he entered the room. "You need people in your life. People you can touch. We all know that. Little hugs at work and sleeping with the cats and dogs isn't enough."

Kate rolled her eyes. Its frustrating when your kids know you better than you are willing to give them credit for. "So, what do you expect me to do?"

"Start by treating Eric as if he was a possible date and not one of us boys," Andy said. Zach nodded in agreement.

"Haven't you noticed that he is here at the drop of a hint of chocolate cake?"

"I just figured he liked the cake. Not me."

"Well, how are you ever going to find out if you don't ask?" Zach thought mothers could be almost as frustrating as girlfriends. And there was no way he was going to mention that it was Anne who first made the comment that Eric and Kate would make a good pair.

"Mom, the kids are falling asleep in front of the TV. Take Eric out back and talk to him. Not about the weather. Not about anything but you two. See what happens. Give it a chance," Andy said. "Hell, give him a chance."

Kate put her head on her hand as she leaned on the counter. She knew she wasn't going to win this fight. No more so than when the boys all agreed that David wanted a Viking funeral. Especially after they had figured out how to fix it. She sighed. "Alright, I'll take the first step." Shaking her head, she went towards the other room. Oh hell. Eric was bending over the two little ones who were fast asleep. He'd been covering them over with the blanket off the back of the couch.

"Eric,"

"Kate, sorry, they fell asleep. Do you mind if they stay here?" he said in a rush, not realizing that she had started talking to him first.

"No of course not Eric. But that isn't what I came out to talk to you about."

"Oh," Eric was afraid that this was not going to be easy for either of them. "You want to talk about what went on in the kitchen?"

"Yes, and what the boys said after you left."

"Ah, okay. Can we have a cup of tea?"

"Sure." Kate headed back to the kitchen. It was empty of course. Andy and Zach had headed out for parts unknown. She put the kettle on and got tea mugs out of the cupboard. After the kettle popped, she made tea. Neither of them said a word as it brewed. Kate finally spoke as she handed him his cup. "Do you want to go sit in the garden?"

"Yes. That would be fine."They walked out the door and down the stairs.

"Eric, I.. I have missed you. The boys were right. I've been doing a real good job of lying to myself." She was staring down at her cup.

"Kate, its okay. I enjoy coming over here, and it isn't just for the cake. I enjoy your company."

Kate looked up. "Thank you. When you first got here, I had the weirdest feeling. One like I'd known you forever and I couldn't explain it. So, I shut it off. I figured that I was just being a nosy and lonely widow when the last thing you needed was someone barging into your life. You were hurt on some level I didn't understand, and was afraid of making worse. So, I dealt with seeing you at the shelter and that was fine for a while." She took a sip of tea.

"I felt the same way Kate. And yes, you were right. I was hurt. Hurt and didn't know how to share any of what I felt. That first night when you opened the back door, I felt so lost and there was this beautiful woman welcoming us in and not caring who we were. Just that we needed help."

"I am not beautiful."

"Yes Kate, you are. You are beautiful on so many levels."

Kate blushed. Felt like she was glowing in the dark. "I'm not. I'm a short, fat, 45 year old woman with gray hair." She was trying not to let this go further.

Eric sat his cup down and moved closer to Kate. "Yes, you are all of those things and you are still beautiful. Not in a glamorous way, but in every way that really counts. You are beautiful in here." He reached up and touched her face.

"Eric..."

"Shush." He took the cup from her hand and then hugged her. Slowly, tentatively, she brought her arms up and hugged him back.

"Eric..."

"Shush, just for a minute." He held her.

*

They had come into the kitchen and were brewing more tea. Neither of them spoke, just stole glances at each other and then looked away. Each was waiting for the other to break the silence. Kate finally spoke.

"Eric, we need to talk. Not sure what about, but we..."

"Yes Kate, and I think now would be a good time. Where do you want to go sit? Outside is a bit cool now."

"Let's go sit in my room."

"Ok. If that's alright with you."

"Its the only place to sit. Everywhere else has someone sleeping in it." She smiled.

Eric smiled and followed her down the hall. He wondered just how much to tell her. He could risk it all, or he could tell just enough and engender a whole different set of risks. Decisions...

Kate pulled the pillows off of a chair and tossed them on the bed. Eric had the feeling that they were meant to be on the bed, but hadn't been in a long time. He took the chair and she sat on the bed, propping herself on the pillows.

"Eric, do you want to go first?"

"No, but I don't think that there is much choice. Whatever you have to say will depend on your reactions to what I tell you."

Kate gave him a quizzical look. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that once you hear my story, you might feel differently about me." He was nervous. He knew he had to tell her the whole truth, and that was something he hadn't done in a long time.

"Oh." Kate was wondering just what he could say that might change the way she saw him.

Eric took a deep breath and tried to figure out where to start. "We talked before about how I was born in Montana and such."

"Yes."

"Well, that is the truth. And that I am a famtrad. However, in our family is another tradition, and that part of my history has shaped my whole life. In fact, it defines who I am more than anything else."

Kate took a sip of her tea and looked at Eric, trying to figure out where this was going. "Ok, go on."

Eric couldn't figure out an easy way to say it. "Umm, Kate, I.. " he couldn't say it. Deep breath, he thought. Just tell it straight through. "I left home thinking that I could get away from it all. Or, at least part of it. I went to college and joined the military. That was both good and bad. In the end, I felt that I wasn't doing the right thing."

"Ok. Lots of people join the military and then decide it wasn't a good thing."

"Yes, but I was in a sort of special forces team and did things that I'll never tell anyone about." He said it with a finality that made Kate realize he was serious. He took a sip of tea and cleared his throat.

"I fell in love at one point and married a girl. She was not pagan. Thought she wanted to be pagan, but it wasn't her thing. She was what I think of as a festival pagan. Fluffy, lite and no depth. Unfortunately, I needed depth and understanding. Something she didn't have to give. Something I didn't learn until it was too late. What she did give me was Mark and Jamie." He stopped for a moment.

"So what happened?" Kate sensed that he was beginning to close up.

"Well, I had trouble holding down a job. We moved around a lot and she got tired of it. When an old friend offered a place for us out on their ranch, I thought it would be the ideal thing. So did my wife. We sold everything we could and moved to the ranch about four years ago."

"That sounds good. You seem like the type of man who would enjoy being up in the mountains."

"Yes, I do. It was a ranch in the northwest corner of Wyoming. Cattle, hay meadows, hunting and enough work for everyone. My wife started out working in the kitchen while I became a ranch hand. I was back doing things I'd done as a kid. Riding horses, working with livestock and hunting. The kids were fine and she home schooled them."