Showing Myself Ch. 15

"Are you crazy?? Yes, you'll be the first one I call! I'll need your approval! And I'll make sure she knows how important you are to me."

"Ok, it's a deal. Any idea when they might get back to you?"

"No idea. All I know is that they have to do a background check next. Maybe they don't even have a position open?"

"Oh, stop, Jim wouldn't have sent you out here for nothing. I'll give him a call tomorrow. It's not every applicant that gets inside information like this, you know."

We had breakfast, and then I called an Uber, and we were on the way to the airport. We breezed through security, and got to the gate two hours early, and then her phone rang. She talked for a few minutes, and I could tell what was happening.

After she hung up, she said, "Jenn, they just asked when I can start! They already did my background check, and they'll email my moving allowance and salary info! All I have to do is accept!"

"Well, I guess we'll be coming back a lot sooner than we thought! God, we have so much to do. Please, don't say a word on facebook or to your family until you've formally accepted and it's a go. That would be a bad omen."

"I won't. I know enough to separate business from pleasure."

"Ok Kate, now I have to ask you. How did you know that? Most girls would be facebooking by now!"

"I just knew, I guess. I wouldn't want to be humiliated for the hundredth time if something went wrong."

The poor girl! She really is walking on pins and needles!

"Ok, but at least let me text Jim so he knows he can put this to rest. And he can put me to rest too, I guess."

"Jenn! Stop it! He really cares for you! You haven't heard the last from him, no matter what charms his new silly fling is throwing at him!"

"It's ok, I even fixed him up with her. He deserves a girl his own age, and all they did was have dinner. It isn't like he went to her room."

Or did he? Who can resist Jim? I brought him to my room after meeting him, and maybe she did the same thing. And I planted all those ideas in his head about what sexual things she would do to him. Maybe I'll never see him again. God, why can't I be twenty years younger! I'd be so good to him!

I texted Jim and said, "Hey, guess what, they're ready to hire her and they're sending the salary info! You are amazing! She really deserves this, Jim."

"Great, my buddy said she was a lock. Now we need to help her move. How much stuff does she have? Will a pickup be enough?"

"So I'll see you again?"

"What do you mean? Of course."

"Well, you're with Lisa now, and I don't want to complicate things."

"Stop it. She's really nice, but you're Jennifer. Tell Kate to get a list going of things she needs to take, and we'll figure out if we need one or two trucks. I'll give her a hand."

"Jim, you have no idea how you make women feel. You're so chivalrous. You probably charmed the pants right off Lisa last night."

Please say you didn't, Jim!

"I wouldn't tell you if I did, Jenn. Get back to me about Kate."

God, what did that mean??? I thought I was destroyed before, but now I don't know what to think! I'll talk to him later.

"Kate, think about what you want to take, and Jim will help out. He has a truck, and a friend with a truck, in case you have more stuff, Ok?"

"Ok, HR said the offer would be sent as an encrypted link, and I'll open it when I get home, and I'll know how much I can spend. This is so exciting!"

"There is so much more to do. You have to contact your new friend about an apartment, you need to find a local bank to start a relationship with, there are utilities, a financial planner, so much stuff. And I'll help you!"

We arrived back home, and I told her she is more than welcome to stay at my place as much as she wanted before she left if she didn't mind sharing a bed again, and she said she would definitely take me up on that offer. I never realized how lonely I was before, but I loved having her and Kari around!

I also talked to them about Jim, and said that he and I had talked, and that he's going to give it a shot with Lisa. I told them I'd be mad and disappointed if it was anyone else, but not her. I said that hopefully they would meet her someday, and they would know what I mean.

It's funny, Kate was the most defensive and said, "I still don't like it Jenn! I saw the way he hugged you and talked to you and treated you. I just don't like it. What if someone I like just finds a younger model and dumps me????"

"Kate, you're 21, they won't find a younger model. It's really ok, I want the best for him, and you'll understand when you meet her. They're probably already raging sex bunnies anyway."

"Oh Jenn, was that a bit of humor? Or sarcasm? Or were you just being catty?"

"A little of everything, I suppose. I guess I'll just have to be happy imagining Lisa bouncing on his big cock and screaming in ecstasy like I did."

"Oh God, TMI!"

"If it makes you feel better, after you meet someone I'm going to be laying in bed and imagining what you two are doing. And I want all the juicy details the next morning."

"You know I wouldn't tell anyone else, but I'll tell you Jenn."

"And I'll tell you if I meet someone too."

"Thanks for that. Jenn, I'm really going to miss you."

"I'll miss you too, but I'll visit so often you'll get sick of me."

"Never! Kari and I will be fighting over you!"

It's so funny how my life turned around. I don't mean to say I had a bad life before, but now I had two girls who looked up to me and we could share secrets and tell each other anything.

The next night the girls and I agreed to have a sleepover like I promised, and I had dug out the old photo albums.

"Ok, I'll warn you, the blue album is regular, and the grey one is a little more risqué. We don't have to look at it if you don't want to."

Kari reached for the bottle of wine and said, "Maybe this will help."

"Oh Kari, you've seen a few of the pictures, they aren't that bad!"

"No, but you probably have hundreds. I'm sure Kate will love them."

Kate laughed and said, "Just because I'm lesbian doesn't mean I want to see just anyone naked! But Jenn isn't just anyone."

Oh boy, this is going to be interesting!

"Ok, as a brief background, I was a military brat and living in Germany at the time, and I met a really wonderful couple, and the wife and I became close friends. I was only 20 when I met them, and she was about 34. She always said I was older than my years, so maybe that's why she liked me. Or maybe it was her very bisexual feelings."

"Jenn, really? I think we know why she liked you. You're gorgeous now, I can't imagine what you looked like then."

"I was cute, but Monika always said she saw something else. Anyway, this is Monika and me sitting on a park bench eating an ice cream. Her husband loved taking pictures of us together, and we spent a lot of weekends out."

Kate studied the picture and said, "She's so beautiful. There is something about her I can't explain."

"Monika was so elegant. She was tall like you, and quiet, and very kind and very sensual. I learned so much from her."

"Like what?"

"We'll wait for the second album for that. Here, look at this picture, she was at least a head taller than me! Look how she carries herself!"

In the picture, we were standing together holding hands, and I remember the moment like it was yesterday. We looked at some more pictures, ranging from shopping to having a picnic and lounging around in their living room.

Kate was so interested, and said, "We see the pictures, but tell us more about her and her husband. We don't see any other people, just them. They must have meant a lot! How did you meet them? Why them??"

I can see how it's odd from their perspective, but how much can I tell?

"Well, we met in somewhat odd circumstances, and I was very naïve and had no idea about anything, like how to act, how to dress, nothing. She kind of took me under her wing."

Kari said, "Ok Kate, this is a case where when someone asks a question, the answer creates a thousand more questions. Jenn, we're grown women, tell us more!"

"I'll think about it. Let's look at some more pictures."

I paged through the album, and found the pictures I was dreading.

"Ok, this is Rolf, my first boyfriend. We were so madly in love!"

I was nearly sick to my stomach, because he never really left my thoughts.

"Omg, you two are so cute together! Look at his blue eyes! Did you go on double dates? Where is he now? Do you stay in contact with him??"

"Well, he was German, and after a year of going together, my dad was transferred back to the states so I had to leave. We wrote letters back and forth, and then the letters became more seldom, and we just drifted apart. I met someone else, and I'm sure he did too."

"And you never tried to reach out to him?? Jenn, this is nuts, even for you!"

"No, I didn't want to interfere with whatever life he has, and he doesn't know my married name, so he couldn't find me anyway."

"Ok, this is perfectly normal. You meet the love of your life and hang around with a couple you met in mysterious circumstances, and then drop off the face of the earth and don't try to find them. Jenn, it's ok to just say hi to him!"

"Well, I did stay in touch with Monika, and she even came here to visit me a few times, but she felt uncomfortable around my ex. He was so jealous of her."

"Jenn, you jump through hoops to help everyone else, and ignore yourself. We're going to help you find him, unless you tell us not to."

"Oh, no need. I have my two favorite girls, and I love seeing you start your lives! I'm fine."

"Yeah, right, you nearly had a breakdown when Jim said he had dinner with Lisa, and now your palms are sweating looking at pictures of your old flame and this woman who is obviously out of this world for some reason."

"Ok, but I'm not a martyr, I really did want Jim to meet someone, and I really don't want to interfere with Rolf. And I really do love helping you two. I'm OK."

"We'll come back to that. Let's look at more pictures."

We finished the first album, and in the meantime, Kari had gone for her iPad, and said, "Ok, we're just going to look up Rolf, and we'll see what his situation is, and we won't send him a message or anything. You'll just see that he's doing ok."

"Kari, I don't think I should. What if he isn't there? And he has a common last name, there are thousands of them!"

"Ok, we'll just go through a few pages and see, and then we'll leave it be. What are you so scared of anyway?"

I gave them his full name and the city where he went to school and told them what he studied, and now I was starting to get curious. Kari did her magic and narrowed it down to about 50 guys. She started pointing out guys and I said no, no, no, and she kept going.

But then a familiar face popped up and I couldn't believe it, and I said "Stop."

I knew it was him. He was older of course, but the eyes hadn't changed.

"That's him. He looks good, so now we know he's ok."

"You don't know anything at all Jenn. You must be attracted to guys like Jim, because Rolf's facebook page is tied with Jim's for the most boring thing I ever saw. It's just him sitting in a canoe, that's it. Did you two go boating?"

"Yes, he used to take me out on the lake."

"So are you going to send him a message??"

"No, I can't, I don't want to bother him."

"Jenn, then can I send him a message?? I'll just say you're my friend and we were going through some old photo albums and you mentioned him."

"I won't tell you not to. But if he's married or has a girlfriend or is indifferent about me, just let it go. I mean it."

"Of course. What time is it there?"

"It would be 4AM."

"Ok, I'll send a message. He'll probably check his page before he goes canoeing."

I didn't even dare to look what she wrote, but she promised it would be nice. But Kate was so interested in the rest of my life and the pictures.

"So how did you meet Monika? You still haven't said. You were so cryptic about it. You know, anything we say tonight stays here, right Kari?"

Kari jumped in and said, "Jenn, you would never believe how loyal we are to you. You can tell us anything."

"You wouldn't like me anymore."

"You were 20, right? We all do crazy things."

"It stays here? You won't judge? You'll still like me? You promise?"

"Jenn, yes!! You weren't committing crimes were you?? Yes, we'll always love you!"

"Ok, I'll tell you. But I'm going to be really hurt if you think I'm disgusting."

Before we looked at more pictures, I went into the story about how I went to the theater the first time with my friends, and how I found it so exciting and kept going back. Kate responded first.

"Ok, so you went there and walked around naked and let guys look at you??"

"It's hard to explain. I just loved it when guys looked at me. It was so exciting! You know, Rolf had this tiny apartment with just a bed and a desk where he did his homework, and sometimes I would lay on his bed and rub myself and make him stand at the door and watch me. Then I'd see him hold his cock and get so excited and it drove me crazy!"

Kari just looked at me and said, "Oh, that's so nice. Anything else you want to tell us? Were you a porn star too?"

"Not really, I was just an amateur. But they did show my film at the theater one evening. Martin recorded it for me, and it was a surprise for Rolf. That's the one I want to digitize and show you."

"Poor Kate, she must be so distraught. She thought you were so sweet."

"I am sweet. And Monika was the sweetest, kindest person I ever knew, but she was also very wild and sexual. I'll bet Kate's future partner would love it if she was wild."

"Point taken. Kate, what do you think of that?"

"I don't know, I've always been forced to hide what I am, so sitting here in bed with you two is pretty wild to me. A month ago I never imagined this would even be possible."

I said, "Ok, so now you know how I felt. I didn't date in high school, and I didn't have any really close friends, and I was just tagging along when we went to that theater that time. And even though they thought it was disgusting, I thought it was so exciting! That's why I went back alone on another day."

"Weren't you afraid of being found out? Even if your dad didn't go to a place like that, maybe one of his friends would."

"No, I never saw anyone I knew, not even at the peep shows where someone could duck in quickly."

"What is a peep show?"

"It was a place with a revolving platform with little windows surrounding it, and guys could pay for a one minute view. It was mostly young college guys and businessmen that worked downtown. Each girl would spend about 10 minutes out there, then a new girl would go out. They liked it when I joined them, because every window would open when the guy announced that there were two girls."

Kari just looked at me and then finally asked, "So, you and another girl are on this revolving table while guys are looking at you and obviously doing what guys do. Were you making out with her? Was this a lesbian show?"

"Oh no! There was no touching allowed! That's why I didn't do it very often, because I wasn't even allowed to touch myself like I did in the theater. I just sat there with my legs open for a revolution, then maybe I'd bend over and let my boobs hang down, stuff like that. I went more to socialize and hang out with the other girls."

"I think we get the picture. Did Rolf know about this?"

"Oh yes, he thought it was so awesome to have a sexy girlfriend like me! He came to watch me several times, but I told him not to masturbate there because I wanted him to myself later."

"Exactly! I hated it when my boyfriends masturbated to strippers before they had a chance to have sex with me."

"Oh Kari, we were just two young people having fun, and I wasn't a stripper. I never did it for money, and I just liked to feel peoples' gazes on me. Ok, this one is for Kate. Sometimes Monika and I would go in a dressing room and try on clothes, and a few times we masturbated together. Can you see yourself doing that with a love interest? Or is that disgusting?"

"I don't know if I'd do that, but I don't think it's disgusting. And can I confess something? I rubbed myself in a dressing room once before. Just for a minute, because I was trying on some jeans and I was thinking someone might think I was hot in them. But I've never been in a dressing room with another girl, so maybe?"

I turned towards Kari, and said, "What about you Kari, have you ever gotten naked with another girl in a dressing room?"

She turned red and said, "Not on purpose."

Kate looked at her and said, "Really? I would love to go shopping with you! I never even had real friends at all, and definitely hardly any of them knew I was gay, and I would love to hang out and be casual with you. Like if I was trying something on in the dressing room and you said I looked great, I would love that!"

I said, "Kari, I'm not telling you anything you don't know, but that's how girls are different. Can you imagine Mike combing Kyle's hair? That would never happen, but I can imagine the three of us sitting around primping. It's just how it is."

"I know, and yes Kate, I'd love to go shopping with you too. You can even check me out if you want."

"Ok, that won't be hard. You're so hot."

"What?? No way, I am so average."

"Jenn, didn't the red dress girl have a similar body to Kari? The small waist and the really nice hips?"

"She's right Kari, I think you're every lesbian's dream."

"Oh great, at least I'd get some action."

Wait, what was that? What about Mike? Is everything not going so well?!! I'll have to talk to her later.

We paged through some more pictures, and each one left even less to the imagination.

Kate asked, "Was Monika the only woman you were close to?"

"She was my closest friend by far, but I had other friends too. The theater I went to first was owned by an older lady, and she was very nice and understanding about my desires. She also liked it when I went there, because it seemed to attract men. I don't know how they knew when I was coming, but they did. And then there was another theater with a much younger woman named Andrea that worked there. She was lesbian, and so beautiful, and she wanted me so bad. She begged me to have sex with her and wouldn't believe I wasn't lesbian too. You would have liked her, Kate."

"What did she look like?"

"She was blonde, shoulder length hair, average height, perfect breasts, and an unbelievable body. The first time I want there the theater was deserted, and she stripped naked and tried to seduce me, and I made her so frustrated when I said she could look at me but not touch. But she did have an orgasm just looking at me, and we became very good friends."

Kate just stared and said, "Jenn, I just can't imagine you doing that."

"I can't explain it either, but I loved it. I would openly play with myself and let anyone watch as long as they were polite."

"Right, because if there's one thing I hate, it's when people are rude while I'm masturbating in public. Jenn, this is crazy even for you! Is this how you met Monika?"

"Yes, but it was different. I had never even touched a man, but she and her husband came into the theater together on a Saturday evening, and I was sitting there naked. I found out later she was bisexual, and she showed an immediate interest in me. And then they had sex right in front of me, and she begged me to let her touch me, but I said no, but that she could look at me instead. She was so frustrated with me! But that was the beginning of our friendship. Within a week, I was staying at their house on a regular basis and sleeping in their bed with them. If you have any questions, I'll answer them, unless you want to get up and leave."