So Much for Expectations

"Is that a hint hint?"

Whitney threw back her head and laughed. She knew that Chad was referring to a scene in Five Easy Pieces, an old movie they once rented, where Rayette (Karen Black) is telling Bobby (Jack Nicolson) in not so subtle terms that's she's horny. It became an inside joke between them, played out on so many of those weekend nights in Whitney's bedroom. "Yes, that's a hint hint," she said, still laughing. Then she added a bit of dialogue from the movie: "Do you love me, Bobby?"

He remembered Jack Nicholson's next line: "What do you think?"

Nicholson's character was trying to evade Rayette's question. But Chad knew that wouldn't work in this real-life situation, where it appeared that he was being propositioned and was oh so tempted to acquiesce. Would that be cheating? Philadelphia Whitney would probably think so. Here he was falling in love with her, yet was temped to hop in the sack with an old girlfriend.

Whitney interrupted his thoughts. "Look, Chad, I'm not here to make trouble, never mind steal you away from your girlfriend. We live over a thousand miles from each other and live different lives. So anything more than what I've HINTED at wouldn't fly. Not to mention that you're involved with someone else."

"What happened to your fragile emotional state?"

She nodded in acknowledgment. "Yeah, that was certainly true when you saw me in Florida. But I'm stronger now, reconciled to a few things, including my divorce from Steve. If meeting you here doesn't go any further, I'm okay with that. It's been fun just seeing you and catching up. On the other hand, if you feel comfortable enough to take things further, I'm all in." She reached out and placed her hand over his. "We once had plenty of fireworks going on between us. My feeling is, we still can. If only for a little while."

Chad thought so too. Whitney wouldn't have to know. Besides, they weren't married, weren't engaged, weren't even exclusive by some agreement, written or unwritten. The thing is, how would he feel if Whitney slept with an old boyfriend and he somehow found out? Not great, but not crushed either. That is, if it was a one-time thing, a for-old-times-sake kind of thing, the kind of thing that this Whitney appeared to be suggesting. He was so tempted, could feel his resistance breaking down, looking into her eyes, those brown and beautiful, pleading puppy-dog eyes of hers. "Your eyes are still so beautiful, you know that?"

She squeezed his hand. "You told me many times during our dating life. And I never tired of hearing it."

Chad knocked back two swigs in a row, still thinking, still unsure which way to go. This Whitney had never seen his house--he bought it years after they had split. He could take her there, see what happens. As if he didn't have ideas. "Wanna see my house?"

"I'd love to see your house. You live in Hilltop Park, right?"

"I do."

"I'm familiar with the area. One of the city's better neighborhoods. So, unless you want another beer, I'm ready to go if you are."

Whitney said she didn't need to return to her hotel (where he had picked her up) for anything, so Chad drove straight to his house. It wasn't lost on him that this was the second Whitney he'd be having over in such a short time. There was something comical about that. This Whitney might find it amusing. Philadelphia Whitney? He didn't think so.

*****

"Looks like you're doing okay to afford a place like this in Hilltop Park," Whitney said. "I'm sure what you take in as a bicycle mechanic alone wouldn't cut it."

Chad nodded as he took her through a tour of the house. "What I take in wrenching barely covers utilities. I managed to save a lot when I worked for the state. The pension helps, too."

"Very nice," she said, admiring the modern, post-World War Two look of exposed glass and stainless-steel appliances in the kitchen. "A house like this where I live in Florida wouldn't cost as much as what I'm sure you paid."

"Location, location, location."

"Right, I know," she said, running her hands over the fabric of the Scandinavian-style sofa. "And I also like how you've furnished it. I've got a few Scan pieces myself."

When he took her upstairs to the master bedroom, she said, "So I have to ask. Has Whitney seen your place?"

"Well, yeah." He stood in the doorway, leaning against the frame, arms crossed, watching her peer through the glass into the backyard. It was dark, so she couldn't see the tree fort the way the young Whitney had.

She turned from the window; her eyes dropped to the bed. "She's probably been in this very room, I bet."

He chuckled at her comically naughty grin. "What can I say? Look, she lives with her parents."

He watched as she continued to look around, sizing her up, deciding that she had indeed dropped some pounds since last they met. For a middle-ager, she was 'holding the line,' so to speak. She looked her age, yet retained a measure of her youthful self. Beautiful eyes, always, and skin, still smooth to the touch. On a purely physical level, the young Whitney did a lot more for him, though he knew that their disparity in age made comparing unfair. What excited him the most about the prospect of sex with this Whitney was the nostalgia factor. Making love for old time's sake in the here and now--to recapture a lost time. "If only for a little while," as she had said.

He was about to step forward to make the first move when the cell inside the pocket of his chinos went off. It was Whitney. Should he take it or let it go into voice mail? He felt squeezed, squeezed between two Whitneys. The phone kept ringing while the Whitney standing just a couple feet away looked at him with raised eyebrows. "It's Whitney," he finally said.

"Speak of the devil," she said. "Go ahead, take it."

Whitney didn't look like she actually wanted him to. In fact, she looked somewhat annoyed.

"Hi Whitney. What's up?"

"Nothing, really. Just called to say hi and that I miss you. Are you busy?"

"Um, well, kind of. Can I call you back?"

After a few moments of silence: "Okay, no problem."

Chad slipped the phone back into his pocket. "Sorry. I should have let it go into voice mail. Guess it spoiled the mood."

She shook her head. "No, I think you did the right thing. You have strong feelings for this girl. For all you knew, she could have been in trouble or it could have been some kind of emergency. As far as spoiling the mood..." Pause. "Chad, just speaking from a woman's point of view, if I was Whitney, I'd be hurt that you didn't have time to speak with me, that you had something more important going on. Lord knows what she's thinking right now." She stepped forward, put her arms around him. Then, keeping her hands around his shoulders at arms-length, she said, "Look, we came here to get intimate. My body still wants to do that but my head and heart tell me that maybe we shouldn't."

He nodded. "Looks like we feel the same sort of ambiguity." He rubbed his thumb along her cheek. "You always were a moral person."

She kissed him. "A moral person? Maybe, but more like an empathetic person. If I was in Whitney's position, I'd feel terribly betrayed knowing that my boyfriend had brought his old girlfriend over to have sex. Sure, she might not ever know. It could be our dirty little secret. But I'd know and so would you."

He would indeed. He also visualized tearing her clothes off. Or, having sex like they sometimes did, with her skirt bunched up around her waist and the crotch of her panties brushed aside. He wanted her that bad. Flashbacks from a past life reeled in his mind. He felt he could seduce her, put her in the mood, despite her moral misgivings. But he also had moral misgivings, and they were tilting him toward doing what he knew was the right thing. "Well, I'm still glad we got together."

"So am I. I enjoy your company. And I still want to keep in touch. Just not..." She cupped her hand over her forehead and sighed. "Look, if you weren't involved with anyone else, you and I would be in this bed right now, humping away. I'd be on top--our favorite position, if you remember. I'd be moaning and breathing heavy, my super-wet pussy would be on fire as I bounced on your thick cock, and then I'd shriek when you brought me to climax. Which you always did. And I'm damn sure you still could."

"Whitney, you're either teasing me or you just like to reminisce."

"Mostly the latter," she said. "Teasing myself, if anything."

He pulled her close for a few moments of passionate kissing. When they pulled apart, Whitney said, "Chad, if you don't take me back to the Hilton right now, my so-called morality might fly out the window."

"Not such a bad thing from the way I feel," Chad said, feeling his "thick" cock pressing against his clothes.

Whitney shook her head. "Timing really is everything, isn't it? Damn." She took his hand. "Well, my friend, it's time to part ways, at least for now. Pardon my woman's intuition again, but I'd bet that Whitney is waiting impatiently for a callback. You should do that ASAP."

*****

If Chad didn't run into any traffic mishaps, he could be in front of Whitney's house by nine-thirty. He had dropped Whitney Lyons off at her hotel an hour ago and was speeding north toward Philadelphia with little more than the clothes on his back--sneakers, off-white chinos and a long-sleeve plaid shirt sans undershirt. He hadn't called her back as Whitney Lyons had advised. That would have been the sensible thing to do. Except that Chad wasn't feeling sensible. He missed his young girlfriend like mad. He hoped she wasn't pissed because of his abruptness on the phone. He wanted to hug and kiss her, wanted to make sure she was okay. Emily and Miles...Oh, man, he could just imagine how they might react, showing up at night uninvited. Miles wasn't crazy about the idea of him seeing his daughter anyway.

Whitney could tell him to get lost. Or, welcome him with open arms. And then what, drive back to Baltimore? He laughed out loud at the possible scenarios. Whitney Lyons said he had strong feelings for Whitney. Yes, he sure as hell did. Truth be told, and notwithstanding the would-be humping he might have done with the older Whitney, he loved this girl. Losing her would crush him.

Driving north on I-95 through the night, he thought of Florida. Oh, what a sweet time that was. If for some reason things ended with Whitney, the memory of that dream trip would sustain him for the rest of his days. The memories played in his mind while he listened to Sirius XM. The minutes ticked by, and by the time he got to Devon, it was nine-fifteen. Good timing.

He pulled his Malibu into a space just past her house and cut the engine. Lights were on. Good, everyone should be up, including Emily and Miles. Oh, well. Should he just go up and ring the doorbell? No, he decided to call her cell.

It went into voicemail. Should he leave a message? "Whitney, sorry I couldn't talk earlier. Hope you're not pissed. Call when you get a chance Thanks."

He sat and waited. Driving up here could have been all for naught. She was pissed, he just knew it. He turned the radio back on and got Green Day doing Boulevard of Broken Dreams: "I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have ever known..." How appropriate with the way he felt at this moment.

He almost jumped when his cell went off. He turned off the radio. "Whitney, I miss you."

"And I miss you, too, Chad."

"You're not pissed? I mean, for being tied-up earlier."

"No, I'm not pissed. I don't expect you to be at my beck and call."

"Can I see you? Tonight, I mean."

"Tonight? It's close to nine-thirty."

"I'm here."

"What?!"

"Look out your window. Slightly to your left."

"Ohmygod! You're crazy!"

"Yes, I'm crazy. For you."

"Oh, Chad, I love you! Don't move, I'll be right out."

He waited until he saw her jog down her walk wearing shorts, low-cut white sneakers and her navy-blue Penn State sweatshirt. Just after he alighted from the car, she was in his arms. This alone was worth the two-hour drive, holding this adorable girl, feeling her soft lips and the contours of her lovely body and inhaling her sweet, young-girl scent.

Between kisses, Whitney said, "Chad, you're such a romantic. For all you knew, I might not have been home."

He nodded. "Yeah, I know." He took a deep breath. "You should know that I've never driven two hours without calling to see anybody. Love makes people do strange things."

"You love me?"

"I sure do. Surprise surprise. But I'd guess your parents won't be exactly thrilled. Do they know I'm here?"

She turned toward her front door. "No, but they heard me running down the steps like some crazed maniac." She again checked the door, and this time she saw Emily step out onto the small brick porch. "Well, they do now." She called out: "Look who's here, mom."

Chad stood there, tense and slightly embarrassed. He gave a sheepish wave.

Emily, all in pink, from her sneakers to her warm-up suit, began walking toward them.

"I just dropped by to say hi," Chad said.

Emily stood with her arms folded against her chest, a bemused expression creasing her lips. "Whitney, did you know he was coming?"

Apologetically, Chad said, "She didn't, Mrs. Chaney. I hope I didn't disrupt anything."

"You drove all this way just to say hi?"

"Ah, yeah. Whitney had called me earlier but I was tied-up. Anyway, I'll soon be leaving."

Emily signed and shook her head. "Chad, first of all, please call me Emily. Being that we're around the same age, the misses sounds awkward. Second of all, as uncomfortable as Miles and I are with this relationship, I wouldn't let you leave without first inviting you in for something to eat or drink. And I'm guessing you might want to use the bathroom."

Chad said he wasn't hungry but he could sure go for a bathroom break.

As they headed up the walk toward the front door, Miles Chaney stepped onto the porch.

"It's okay, Miles," Emily said. "He just wants to use the bathroom."

Whitney covered her mouth and giggled.

"You mean he doesn't have one at his place?"

"It's out of order," Chad said, trying to humor the dour-looking Miles, standing in his tan PJs and slippers. He didn't laugh, didn't crack a smile. But Whitney and Emily did. Both laughed out loud.

Emily directed Chad to the bathroom. Minutes later, he joined Emily and Whitney in the living room. Miles, however, went up to his room. Emily said, "As you can see, Chad, my husband isn't onboard with this."

"Yep, I know."

Whitney, leg tucked under her on the sofa next to Chad, said, "He might never be. But what about you, mom?"

She took a few moments to answer, while reaching back and curling strands of hair with her finger. "I don't know, honey. I accept it, I guess, because you seem happy. No offense, Chad. I like you. I just think...well, you know how I feel and why."

He nodded. "Yes ma'am, I do. Anyway, thanks for inviting me in. Meanwhile, I better get going."

When he stood, Whitney reached up and grabbed his hand. "Not without me, you're not." She then looked at Emily like a pleading little girl. "Mom, it's Friday night."

Chad wanted to take her home but knew to keep his mouth shut.

Emily stopped curling her hair. "Well, Chad, it looks like you're getting more than just the use of our bathroom."

Whitney practically sprung from the sofa. "It's okay?! I can go back to his place?!"

"It's not like you haven't been there," Emily said. "By the way, Chad, I'm glad you took her to see Fort McHenry. She loved it. Told me you know your history. I've seen the photos."

She and Chad stayed in the living room while Whitney ran upstairs to pack. Emily came over to sit beside him, her hands tucked into her lap. "You love my daughter, don't you?"

"More than love her, I'm crazy about her." He knew she wasn't pleased. Her look of sad resignation spoke volumes. He flashed a forced smile. "Not what you wanted to hear, I know."

"Look, Whitney's a grown woman, old enough to make her own decisions. Besides, she seems crazy about you also, and I'd hate to see her hurt because you didn't feel the same."

They looked up to see Whitney coming down the stairs, backpack in tow. "Have fun," Emily said. "And be safe."

"I will, mom. I always feel safe with this guy." She wrapped her arms around one of his arms and pressed her body against his. She then kissed Emily goodbye and followed Chad out to the car. "I'm so excited," Whitney said when Chad drove off, almost shaking with enthusiasm.

"Me too. I didn't know what to expect when I came here. The last thing I expected was to return to Maryland with the girl I'm crazy about."

A few miles down the road, Whitney said, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but did you and the other Whitney ever meet up? Just curious."

Chad swallowed hard. "Ah, as a matter of fact, we did. We went out for a drink."

"Oh... Is she still in Maryland?"

"She is. Expects to return to Florida in a few days."

Moments of silence passed. Chad could feel the tension between them. He felt his terse answers might be giving her clues that there was a lot more he wasn't telling. Which of course there was. He had to say something to break the ice, to put any insecurities she might harbor regarding his old girlfriend to rest. "You should know that we have no plans to see each other again."

Whitney looked at him. "Chad, it's okay. What you do is your business." Pause. "So, did you talk about me? Just kidding. You don't have to answer that."

Chad began to relax. "Yes, we sure did. She knows how much I adore you."

Of course, Whitney didn't know the rest--the strong mutual attraction that almost led to intimacy and that it all happened just hours ago. She didn't have to know. He hadn't lied to her; he just didn't tell her the whole truth. He knew that some things were better left unsaid, especially if those things that had the potential to ruin a good thing.

Whitney put her seat back and closed her eyes. Chad thought she looked so adorable, with her cute face snuggled into the shadows of the car. "Sleepy?"

She opened her eyes, then tilted her face toward his. "No, not really. Just relaxed and still so excited about spending the weekend with you. Maybe we can do Fort McHenry again?"

"Maybe. Or, we can head down to Saint Michaels on the Eastern Shore for the day. There's some nice restaurants and shops. It's a fun place just to hangout, make the scene."

"I'd like that. I've been to Ocean City but not any of the small towns you pass along the way. It doesn't matter where we go, really. I just love being with you."

Chad watched her close her eyes again, thinking how lucky he was and how wrong expectations can be. After Florida, based on the short shelf life of so many summer romances, his hopes for seeing Whitney again weren't very high. Yet here he was, going into the fall of the year, basking in the throes of a hot romance, one that kicked off around the pool of a Marriott Hotel. So much for expectations.