Southern Tide Vol. 02

She dropped down to the couch, and picked up her cell phone from the coffee table. She wanted to call Brian and apologize for Derek's actions, but what good would that do? He would probably say that it was alright, but never come back. Instead, she dialed Cat's number, hoping to get a little advice. After a few rings, Cat picked up.

"Hi Cat. Hope I'm not calling too late."

"No, what's up?" her cousin asked.

"About next week...I don't think I can make it."

"How come?"

"Some stuff happened with me. I need to stay here and take care of it."

She was sorry for canceling, but was no longer in the mood to make the trip to see them. Derek's actions had seen to that.

"Did you ever talk to Brian?" Cat asked.

"Yeah, I did."

"How was it?"

"It was good. He came over and...Derek fucked it all up."

"Wait...wait he came to your house? So y'all are..."

"No." she sighed, "I invited him to dinner...to talk. Everything was going well. You should have seen him. He got a haircut and everything."

She smiled to herself, as the memory of his new look came to mind. Reality soon caught up with her, and the smiled faded as quickly as it had appeared.

"Wow, sounds like things are going better than I thought." Cat said.

"I thought so too, until Derek got in his face and threatened him."

"Say what? You serious?"

"Yeah. His sister saw me at the store with Brian, and got him all worked up. I think he was waiting for Brian to leave so that he could corner him."

"Sooo...you guys hung out before tonight?"

She knew the order of events was confusing, but she didn't have time to explain. She just wanted a quick solution to her newest problem.

"Yeah, it was his idea."

"So why are you on the phone with me, and not calling to check up on him?"

"I'm embarrassed Cat. You know he was a little scared of me and when he finally let his guard down, all this happened. I don't think he'll want to talk to me after what Derek said."

"What did Derek say to him?"

"That he didn't want him around Joshua or me. It's all because I won't get back with him."

"Damn, there's a whole lot going on that I don't know about, huh? Since when does he want to be with you?"

"Since Stephanie dropped him. I thought they'd be married by now, since they've been together for so long. but she left him I think."

"Wow."

"I wish she would go back to him, so he could leave me and Brian alone." Kiara blurted.

She was immediately overcome with embarrassment at this blatant admission. Her plan was to approach the conversation with a slight reluctance. Now there would be no fooling herself, or Cat.

"Sounds like y'all were hitting it off before all this. Maybe if you talk to him he'll come back."

"We were doing good...but now I don't know. I might have to tell Joshua the bad news."

"Hold on Ki. You haven't spoken to him and you don't know what's what yet. Give him some time, and see what he says." Cat urged.

"So you're saying I should let him call me first?"

"No...I don't know. I think he knows it's not your fault, but he might be uncomfortable going over there. Did you say anything to him after Derek got in his face?"

"No. It happened when he left to go home. I was putting Joshua to bed, when I heard Derek outside. By the time I got downstairs, he was gone and only Derek was out there."

"Shit. What an ass!" Cat spat out.

"I know. I gave him a piece of my mind, but it was still too late. Brian's gone now and not coming back."

"Not necessarily. Brian doesn't know that you heard anything right?"

"I guess. Why?"

"Well, that buys you a little time. You can wait till tomorrow to see if he calls you. If he doesn't, then you might have to make the first move."

"Maybe I should just leave it alone. I'm so fed up"

"Don't Ki. This is a one-time chance, you know?"

"Yeah...maybe." Kiara responded, with even less enthusiasm.

She was losing the energy to think; to talk.

"Come on think about it. What are the chances of Dale's best friend coming to see you after everything that happened? I wouldn't even think it was true, and I'm the one who asked you to give him a chance in the first place. Don't give up on him Ki."

"Have you told Dale anything about this?" Kiara asked.

"No. I was hoping that if things took off, you'd tell us on your own."

"So Brian hasn't said anything to him about me?"

"Not that I know of. Why?"

"Nothing." she said, and realized that maybe she may have been wrong about him after all. "Maybe he doesn't want Dale to know."

"I don't think that's it. Some people like to be private. Just wait till tomorrow and see what happens, okay?"

"I'll try. I'm just really worried about him."

"I know Ki." Cat said sympathetically.

"We apologized to each other for everything that went down."

"Get some sleep Ki. Put it in God's hands. You've survived worse with The Almighty by your side, right? Brian will come back, don't worry. Just have a little faith."

"Alright, I'll try. I'll call you tomorrow okay."

"Okay Ki and please, please try not to worry. I love you."

"Love you too Cat. Goodnight."

Kiara lay back on the couch, with her cell phone still in hand. Her head throbbed with pain and she felt a slight fever as she brushed the hair away from her right temple. Derek had gotten her so worked up, that her physical symptoms were getting worse. She caught the tiniest whiff of Brian's cologne against the cushions, and remembered that this was where he sat down with Joshua. She missed him already, and wished that she could go back in time, to the kiss. If only she had known what would happen, she would have asked him to stay, avoiding this whole mess.

She felt like she would never see him again, but for the sake of faith, she tried to think positive. She looked to the coffee table where their wine glasses still stood. She knew hers by the faint trace of coral lipstick on the brim, but grabbed Brian's drink instead. She pressed her mouth to the clouded imprint of his lips on the cool edge, and drank the last of his wine.

"God, why couldn't this have gone my way, just this once?" she sighed.

She fought the tears that were itching to come out, and sank back against the soft throw pillows. She hated doing this to herself, but her thoughts only lingered on the kiss and the weight of his body against hers. Her head spun with visions of the recent argument, intertwined with memories of the recent kiss. She was tired and didn't want to stay awake any longer. Her eyes fluttered shut and in a few moments, she fell into a deep and troubled sleep.

Chapter Four

Brian squinted as the bright sunlight beamed through the crevices of his window blinds. The sun was close to setting, and he had been asleep for quite some time. He was exhausted from another hard day's work and planned to crash in bed as soon as he got home. Unfortunately, he was startled out of sleep by his vibrating cell phone. He had forgotten to turn it off, and if it hadn't been Dale on the line, he would have ignored it completely. The only other exception would have been Kiara, but he hadn't heard from her in a while.

"Hello?" he answered groggily.

"Hey man. It's been a while. How ya been?"

"Same old shit...you know."

"Really? Don't you have something to tell me?" Dale asked, with suspicion in his voice.

"Huh? Like what?" Brian replied lazily.

His face was plastered to the upside of his pillow and his brain was still asleep. For the moment, he couldn't rely on his memory to figure out what Dale was talking about, so he asked once more. "What are you talkin' about?"

"Everybody's keeping me out of the loop and I don't appreciate it."

"Whaaa..?" Brian replied mid-yawn.

"You and Kiara." Dale revealed, "That's what I mean. She's been on the phone with Cat a lot lately, and I know it's got something to do with you. I pretend not to notice, just to give them some space, but I thought you would've come to me by now."

"Oh...what's she been telling Cat?" he asked curiously.

"That's the thing. I don't know. Cat looks worried all the damned time, and I tried asking but she wouldn't say anything. She thinks I might go tell you everything. So what's going on?"

"Well...it's a long story."

"I've got the time and I'm home alone. Get on with it or I'm going to have to bring Uncle John into this...and you know how he always made us talk no matter what!"

"No, don't say anything to him."

"I won't if you tell me what's going on. I spoke to him and he told me you got cleaned up. Looking like an office boy now, huh?" Dale chuckled.

"Yeah...something like that. I did it for her." Brian mumbled.

Was he feeling shame for changing, because of a woman? He wasn't sure, but hoped that Dale wouldn't rub it in.

"So y'all got something going on?"

"Well..." Brian said as he rolled over in bed and looked up at the white ceiling. "I was hoping it would turn out that way. You know after meeting Kiara I began to feel differently about a lot of things."

"Yeah, I noticed."

"Joshua's a good kid and after she told me what happened to her, I wanted to be there for them. Her ex left her when she was pregnant. It's sad but she made it through alright. Anyway, she invited me over for dinner because she wanted to talk."

"About what?"

"She didn't know if I was being a fake. Those things I said about Cat were still bothering her."

That's understandable. Even though Cat says she's over it, I know deep down it still bothers her. But she's working hard to look past it. Don't worry too much."

"I'm trying. I met with Kiara and we kinda settled things. It was going well until the shit hit the fan, and Josh's father got involved."

"What happened?"

"Well we had dinner and I was even planning on asking her out again. When I was leaving her house, the asshole suddenly jumps out of his car and gets in my face. He starts yelling at me in front of the house, saying that he doesn't want to see me around his family, and that he don't want no white boy raising his son. I could see the neighbors looking out of their windows, and I didn't want to fight in front of Kiara's house, so I just took off. If it was anybody else I would've put a beat down on the guy, but he was Josh's dad."

"Damn man." Dale said empathetically.

"Joshua was the only thing that saved him that night. He might have been drinking too, so I just let it go. I don't want Kiara to think of me as a violent person. I already fucked up once. I won't do it again."

"You did the right thing man . Have you spoken to her?"

"No...I don't know what to do."

"Wait, when did all this happen?"

"About four days ago."

"And you haven't called her?" Dale asked. The alarm in his voice was loud and clear.

"No." Brian sighed. "Come on man. Give me a break! What would you have done in my position? She says there's nothing between them but...I don't know. It's been years since they were together, yet he's shows up at her doorstep, and tells me to stay away from his family. What would you think?"

"You think she's lying to you?"

"No...that's not it." Brian sighed, "I want to believe her, but I don't want to be the idiot here. I was starting to care about her. I want her to be happy, but this dude is looking to fuck up everything I worked hard for."

"So she hasn't called you either?"

"No. Maybe they're getting back together." Brian said glumly.

"Nah, I don't think so."

"Why not?"

"If she was getting back with him, and was happy, she wouldn't be calling Cat so much. She didn't say anything when he came at you?"

"I don't even think she knew. She wasn't outside when it happened and I didn't stick around. Neighbors were watching us...and if she did see, she was probably embarrassed."

"There you go!"

Brian didn't answer, because he had already thought of what Dale was going to say.

"She's embarrassed and feels bad." Dale continued. "She probably did see and if not, maybe someone told her. She knows that you were a little scared of her after she yelled at you the first time."

"I wasn't scared...I was just..."

"Scared!" Dale interjected, "Anyway, she probably thinks you want nothing to do with her."

"No...that's not it. I want her to be happy. I just don't know if I could give that to her."

"Man, shut up and take a risk would ya? She let you into her home and around her son. If that's not a good sign, I don't know what is. You need to do something before she really gets back with that jerk."

"You're right. I'll call her tomorrow."

"Why not right now?"

"I promised the boys that I'd go out with them. We're going out for a couple of drinks tonight."

He had indeed set up a night with the other hands at the farm, but it was both a means of distraction and procrastination. He was afraid to face Kiara. He hadn't called her in days, and she probably thought that he was a coward.

"What's more important right now? A drink or making sure she's alright? You should stop by her house and talk to her." Dale said. "Tell her everything you told me, and that you're sorry."

"Yeah, maybe you're right." Brian said, finally realizing that he was only making things worse by prolonging his silence.

"Do it now man! The longer you wait, the worse it gets!"

"Yeah...I will." Brian continued; the intimidation still evident in his voice.

"Stop being scared. You scared of her, or this guy. Who is it?"

"I ain't scared of him." he responded defensively, "I'm scared of losing her!"

It was God's honest truth.

"So get your ass over there! Go to her in person and say sorry. You already waited too long to say anything, so who knows what she's thinking. Trust me; you're going to come out looking better than the guy. He still has power over the situation, and can mess things up between you and Josh; not just between you and Kiara."

"Yeah, you're probably right. I'll take care of it. So... how are things with you and Cat? How's she doing?"

"She's good. I wanted to talk to you about something though. That stuff about Kiara wasn't the only reason I called."

"What is it?"

"Well...I got Cat an engagement ring."

"Damn man! That's great, congratulations!" Brian chuckled.

"Yeah, thanks...but I haven't given it to her yet." Dale said, not matching his friend's excited tone.

"You're having second thoughts?"

"Yeah...I mean not about her, just about it being too soon. I needed a little advice."

"No offense, but you came to the wrong guy. I know shit about relationships and engagements."

Dale laughed in response.

"Shouldn't you be asking John, instead of me?" Brian asked.

"You're my best friend man. I wanted to tell you first."

"Well thank you, I appreciate it." he smiled. "Are you ready to tie the knot again?"

" I think so. I'm just worried that she'll say no. It's only been a year and maybe she's not ready."

"Are you getting along with her in the same house?"

"Yeah, everything is perfect. We get along great and Max loves her. I just think she's going to have more questions about Marie and Jessie, once I pop the question. We don't really talk about them, because she thinks it's too painful for me. I'm just really nervous."

"Like you told me man, take a risk. Don't doubt yourself. The worst part's already over for you."

"Yeah, I know. Maybe I should wait a while longer."

"Maybe...but you should just get it out of the way. Tell her how you feel. Don't worry; she's going to say yes."

"I hope so. Now, get your ass over there!"

"Yeah, I need to shower."

"Get to it! I'll call you later and we'll talk more. Kiara's a good woman. Don't let that asshole steal her away."

"I won't."

They hung up, but instead heading for the shower, Brian sat up in bed, and thought about what he might say to Kiara. Joshua wouldn't be around to soften her anger, and he was positive that she would be disconcerted about his disappearance. He had obviously hurt her feelings by never calling back; Dale's call confirmed it.

He never wanted to hurt her; however, what happened wasn't entirely his fault. He was proud that he hadn't taken the route of violence, yet he probably looked like some sissy to Derek and her neighbors. He took a deep breath and forced himself to stand up. Any more thinking would lead him to non-action and that wouldn't benefit either of them. He had to fix things. She was the one and he would not let Derek take her away.

...the following day

Kiara had lain in bed all morning and afternoon. With Joshua away, she had nothing to look forward to and no reason to get up. She had tried to sleep in, but couldn't manage to drift off. The cogs in her head were always turning; replaying and over analyzing the events of the last few days.

She never took rejection this badly but her mind had been in a depressed state ever since that fateful night. Derek hadn't stopped calling, but Brian did. She wished that it was vice versa, but life never went as she wanted it to. She felt cursed. She had spoken to Joshua earlier and pretended that everything was okay; that she was okay. He was having fun at his grandmother's house, and was completely oblivious to everything that had been going on. She would try to keep it that way as long as she could.

Brian had left her alone, but that was much minor to the fact that Joshua would never see him again. She should have been more upset by Derek's involvement, but it was Brian who angered her the most. Not only did he not stand up to her son's father, but he never called to discuss what happened, or if he had any intention of seeing her again.

But she expected as much. After all, how could she ever be with him if he wasn't willing to stand up to Derek? It was even worse, because most of the neighbors had caught the spectacle and rumors were flying around about her "new white boy," as they liked to refer to Brian.

A few came to her door asking if she was alright, yet their true intentions were to get the scoop on her recent troubles. She usually didn't care about nosey neighbors, but the weight of all these events were close to breaking her defenses. She felt defeated, and had no idea what to do next. She had recently turned to Cat, hoping to find some solace but her hopes were dashed by her cousin's good news. Cat hesitantly explained that Dale had proposed to her and presented her with an engagement ring. Of course Cat accepted and was more than excited, even though she tried to hide her enthusiasm.

Kiara understood why she was so cautious, and was happy for them. She did her best to swallow the envy down, so as not to ruin her relationship with Cat. It wasn't until after some thought that she told Cat what really happened. She had cried on the phone then, and was ashamed for doing so.

Brian's absence had put her in a melancholy state. Maybe her tears were due to the stress; she didn't know. She was the one that females held in high esteem, because she was always the tough one. Now she couldn't even keep it together. She had never cried over any man other than Derek, and even back then she had hidden her tears from him. But now she was crying over a man she barely knew, and it bothered her.

Cat was her usual self and remained supportive. She came up with words that did make Kiara feel better, but only for a short while. Kiara hated the fact that she had to put a damper on her cousin's spirits. After all, this was her time to be happy. Cat had gotten her fairytale and no one deserved it more. Maybe this was retribution. Maybe she was being punished for throwing her cousin to the wolves when they were younger.

Before she could punish herself with any more negative thoughts, the doorbell began buzzing in the distance. She knew that it might be the neighbors again. Brian wouldn't have the guts to show up, and she already warned Derek to stay away from her. She thought to pretend not to be home, but remembered that her car was still parked in the driveway, and the relentless buzzing was nowhere close to ending.