Stay Sweet Ch. 02

She gripped my thick, smooth shaft in her hand. "I just wanna..."

She leaned in closer to my head, tentative, gentle. I could feel her breath on my tip as she whispered, "I'm just gonna..."

She planted one kiss on the head. Then another. And another. And then she fed the head into her mouth.

I've been struggling to come up with a polite way to describe what happened next ever since.

I'll just stick to the facts. For starters, Ji-yeong didn't even realize you were supposed to go up and down. I wanted to guide her, but it took a minute to figure out how to do so because everything about using my hand to push her up and down my length seemed evil, given the circumstances. Once I finally figured out that I could just say "hey, try going up and down," there was still the matter of her lips being dry, her tongue not doing anything, her actual suction being kind of weak, her teeth occasionally scraping against me...

It was fucking amazing.

First of all, it was funny. How could it not be funny? The lead-up to it had been, hands down, the hottest foreplay of my life. We spent all this money, went through all this effort to set this moment up, we are practically getting drunk off each other, and then suddenly we slip on this banana peel of a blowjob and we end up trashing the whole thing. It was something out of an X-rated sketch comedy show. Second of all, it was Ji-yeong. My love for her wasn't predicated on how well she could give brain. Some people—stupid people—laugh about loving a beautiful woman for her personality, but Ji-yeong had the best personality I'd ever known. This blowjob was a curious reflection of that, and in a way, it was kind of sweet.

Which leads me to my third point: This woman, who had straight up told me she doesn't do blowjobs, was so into what I had to offer she was willing to potentially embarrass herself to worship it. That's pretty damn awesome, and the thought kept my erection strong, allowing me to get into the weird, awkward rhythm of what she was doing...at least until, in my excitement, I thrusted up into her throat, she gagged, spit me out of her mouth—"Uh-uh!"—and went into a minute-long coughing fit.

"Oh God, do you need water?" I asked.

"I'm fine," Ji-yeong croaked. "I'll be..." After one small coughing fit, she assured me, "I'm okay now, thanks." And then, crawling back up my naked body, taking me into her arms, she said the words herself, with a ton of mirth and a hint of shame: "How's it feel to have had The Worst Oral Sex of Your Life?"

"Not that bad, actually." I meant it.

"C'mon, Pete," she said with disdain, a little bit of it genuine. "It's not nice to lie to somebody like that."

"I mean, it was awful. It was like getting sucked off by an Alzheimer's patient." Ji-yeong laughed, giving me a light shove on the shoulder. "But it was kinda cool!" I said. "It was so bad it was funny, and that made it kinda sexy in its own right."

"The Manos: The Hands of Fate of blowjobs," Ji-yeong mused.

"The Hobgoblins of blowjobs," I corrected.

"Ooh, I like that better," said Ji-yeong. Laughing her sweet laugh, smiling her sweet smile, staring at me from on her side with those wonderful brown eyes.

"It was so...you." I said, realizing the best way to sum it up.

"That's my line," she snarked, backlit by the diffused glow of the lanterns while the light of the virtual fireplace flickered against her naked, golden shoulders.

"Get on your back," I told her, rising to my knees and moving down her body.

"Oh!" She seemed thrown by this. "Are you going to...?"

"I wasn't." I hooked my hands into her teddy and started pulling it down the rest of her body. "Then you had to, uh, exist, and now this is happening..." A thought suddenly popped in my head, stopping me cold. "Unless you really don't want to?"

"No no! I always wanted to, I just didn't think you would, especially after—"

"You thought way wrong," I said. I pulled the teddy off her legs, leaving her completely naked, bringing me face to face with a long, dark landing strip that pointed the way to her clean, glistening pussy. "Beautiful," I said. "I didn't take you for a waxer."

"Um, it's a story," said Ji-yeong. "I'll tell you later."(*) She reflexively started closing her legs, stopped, then opened them again. It reminded me of how nervous I was the first time Bernadette went down on me; Ji-yeong really wasn't used to this.

(*Quick as I can make it, since this actually isn't coming up: Ji-yeong tried it when she first started dating Chad, on the advice of her roommate. She liked it—blistering pain aside, of course. But that "sensitive subject" Ji-yeong referred to during her meltdown? Chad apparently thought she'd "denigrated her body" by waxing down there, which...hey, natural is nice, but her body, her choice, psycho. So she let it grow back and never waxed again until a couple of days ago, when she was feeling down and decided "Why not?")

I nodded my understanding. "Well, I'll tell you what." I started stroking her hip. "Just relax and let me do my thing. It might feel weird for a second, but you'll get used to it. Okay?"

Ji-yeong took a deep breath. "Okay." She shivered with anticipation as I lowered myself to her.

I took my first lick, savoring the pleasant sour tang of her pussy. She yelped in shock, throwing her hands over her mouth to cover it up.

"You can make noise if you want," I looked up to tell her. "It's not like you'll bother anyone."

"Sorry," she said, wincing. "I'm just not used to shouting during sex."

I had a thought about why that might have been that I immediately banished to the back of my mind. "However you want to enjoy it," I told her from between her legs. "This part of the night is all about you. In fact, don't be afraid to tell me where to go or what to do, okay?"

"Whatever you say, Jeeves," she said with a little laugh. I dipped my head back down and heard her take a deep breath.

Most guys I hear from talk about eating pussy like a feral zombie eats brains. As someone who's always enjoyed simple, leisurely blowjobs, I tend to default to the same approach—for better or worse—when I'm going down on a girl. I start with a little anticipatory teasing; just a few priming licks around the outside of the lips, no need to be mean or fancy. Then, some leisurely licks up and down the slit. Ji-yeong, having never been eaten out before, went crazy when I started doing this; her breathing got intense, and I could feel the sheets under me start to pull upwards as Ji-yeong started to ball them up into her fists. This was resistance, I told myself. However pleasurable this might have been for my friend, her body wasn't used to it and was fighting it.

I glanced up, and was treated to a gorgeous sight; Ji-yeong's body tilted upward, chest pushed out, eyes squeezed shut, her mouth alternating between panting and biting her lower lip. She'd actually brought her head within arm's length, so I reached up to stroke her face, to let her know it was all right and that she was safe. "Do you want me to stop?" I asked.

Ji-yeong shook her head. "Keep going," she seethed.

So I did. Eventually I felt her face fall away from my hand, and heard her plop back down on our little bed. I kept up the gentle up and down licks, occasionally probing a little deeper or veering left or right to lick up her labia, just to keep things interesting. Once her breathing got soft and I felt her body loosen up a bit, I started thinking of shapes; predictable, variable patterns, meant not necessarily to excite in and of themselves, but to relax and drop defenses.

That was the problem as far as I saw it: her guard was up. Not that I was going to hold it against her if I couldn't bring it down; I felt kind of funny calling it a "problem," actually, as if there was a fix and she couldn't just, you know, be that way. But it was like she said: this could be the only other time we did this, and I wanted her to enjoy it as much as she could. That wasn't going to happen unless she relaxed, and as long as I wasn't pushing her...well, as always, I felt like I owed her the try.

So I started with a simple circle, varying speed and pressure in a trial-by-error to figure out what she liked. To keep her from falling asleep I'd switch it up into squares, rhombuses, triangles. The signs of her enjoyment and discomfort were subtle, but I managed to keep up. At one point, her breathing seemed too soft, so I changed the shape and picked up the pace. At another, I felt her legs tense around me, but they weren't squeezing me in, so I eased off the pressure. I was looking for a specific rhythm in her breath, a specific posture when she was laying down. Slow, heavy breathing, not quite panting, meant I was doing good. Doubly so if I was making her pretty chest rise and fall with each breath, and her shoulders were down and her eyes were closed. That told me she was giving herself over to her pleasure. It was amazing to see her this way, but I had to work to sustain it, gradually increasing speed and strength, occasionally hitting the gas and attacking her clit for a few moments, just to keep her aware of the heights I was trying to build her to.

Eventually, she got there. Her legs tensed up again, but this time they were drawing me into her center. I responded by driving my tongue deeper and reaching up to cup her breasts, and she finally let out a squeak of a mostly silent scream. I egged her on by tweaking her nipples, stiff as fresh pencil erasers and slightly less thick, eventually causing her to clasp her hands over mine as she suddenly cried "Oh shit!" and her hips lurched upward, seizing up as if an electric current was shooting through her body...and then she relaxed with a loud, contented sigh.

I made Ji-yeong curse again. This time, I was proud rather than shocked.

I rose up, wiped my mouth clean of my friend's juices, and crawled up to her face. "Hi," I said.

"Hi," she said back, dreamily.

"Was that okay?" I asked. "Did you like it?"

"It was great," she said. "It felt a little weird at first, and I didn't know what to ask for because I never had it done before, but once I got comfortable, I really got into it."

"I'm glad," I said, stroking some stray hairs out of her eyes. "Ready for the main event?"

She nodded.

I bent down to kiss her while I took my rigid cock in hand and guided it to her sopping entrance. Just like last time, I teased her with it, tracing her lips and her slit with my head. Unlike last time, I got to look at her pretty face as it contorted into pleasured, frustrated expressions. I always loved this part of sex: first entry. That sudden, beautiful shock of impalement, the shine of the eyes as the body gets accustomed to its welcomed intruder. I pushed forward and watched Ji-yeong's eyes and jaw stretch in delight while her hands shot up to grip my shoulders. It was always some wonder to behold, but with her it was particularly breathtaking. I don't think I'll forget that expression for as long as I live.

I started gently. Not like that morning, where I slowly pulled out and slammed back in. This was an easy, consistent in-and-out motion. Maybe—no, scratch that, I was definitely afraid of hurting her by going too hard. But I also wanted to relish this, to enjoy the texture of her vaginal walls as my cock slid back and forth against them, and to watch Ji-yeong shift back and forth, eyes squeezed shut, as I lovingly humped into her.

I noticed that she had gone silent again. Admittedly, I like my partners to be vocal during sex, but there was no way I was going to call her on this, especially after I just made fun of her blowjob skills. Instead, I just paid attention to the little ways she was reacting, the involuntary expressions and movements that told me she was enjoying this fuck.

And then I had an idea. I wasn't going to push her to be more vocal than she was comfortable being, but what I could do was let her know that it was okay to react to me, and she could do whatever she wanted with that information.

I leaned down and kissed her, continuing to pump her pussy all the while. When I separated from her mouth, I said, "I love the way you kiss me."

On a downstroke, I slammed into her a little harder than usual, pushing a sharp, quiet gasp from her lips. "I love the way you gasp when I do something you don't expect."

To accentuate this, I reached down her body real quick so my fingers could make a few brief passes over her clit, pushing another gasp out of her. She shut her eyes and tilted her head back. So I said, "I love the way you close your eyes and bask in however I make you feel."

She opened her eyes and gave me a mischievous, challenging grin. I was ready for it: "I love the way you stare right into me, like you're holding me tight just with your gaze."

She laughed and looked up and down my body, taking me in. And then she did something I really should have expected: She said, "I love the way you sweet-talk me. Even when you exaggerate I feel like you really believe it."

I must have blushed, because Ji-yeong reached up to stroke my cheek. "I love the faces you make when we're together," she said. "You've been such a rock for me these past few weeks, but you look so concerned and vulnerable now and it's kind of adorable."

"I love the faces you make when we're together," I said. "The little signs I see that you're enjoying this just make me want to fuck you harder." Driving the point home, that's what I started doing, going from a soft humping to a nice, steady fuck, our groins clashing in an erotic applause.

"Uhh!" There it was. Ji-yeong started to bounce under me, moaning from my attentions. "I love the way you fuck me," said Ji-yeong. "I love feeling filled up by your thick, juicy dick."

Word of advice: you will never, ever be more turned on than if you're lucky to hear your innocent first crush talk about your thick, juicy dick. "DAMN, Ji-yeong," I said, my hips picking up the pace of their own volition. "I love it when you swear during sex!"

"I kinda love it too," she giggled. "I especially love the word 'dick.' 'Pound me with that pretty dick of yours, Pete.' 'I can't believe how hard your dick is, Pete.' Ow!" Her shoulder was getting pushed into a position it wasn't meant to go between my pounding and my pinning her wrists above her OH

"SHIT!" I yanked my hand away from her wrists and stopped immediately. "Oh my God! I'm so sorry! Are you okay?"

Ji-yeong suddenly started laughing.

"Look, I know you said you weren't tissue paper, but considering what you've been through, I really don't like that I just did that to you!"

"No," she cried out between her laughs, "I'm not laughing at you! I just didn't realize what you were doing until you stopped!"

"Oh," I said, and then I started laughing too, though not as hard as Ji-yeong.

Calming down, she turned back to me and embraced me, kissing me on the cheek, and then the lips. "Thank you," she said, "for thinking of me. Chad did used to pin me down, but not the way you did. It was a lot more..."

"Brutal?"

"Yeah. With him, I felt trapped, but with you I feel...safe. Like nothing could hurt me."

"Save for an occasional dislocated shoulder."

"I guess," Ji-yeong giggled.

A voice that I didn't want to listen to started making its way to the front of my mind, tempting me with a part of Ji-yeong's body I hadn't really appreciated yet.

I gave in. "Hey," I told her, "as long as you trust me...I won't put you on your stomach, but can I try taking you doggystyle? I kinda wanna get acquainted with your ass."

Ji-yeong hesitated to answer.

"We don't have to—"

"No, no, I'm just...you know what? Let's do it." She turned onto her tummy and quickly propped herself onto her hands and knees. "Like this?"

"Yeah, that's great!" Really great, actually. I'm one of the rare guys under 25 who isn't that into asses, but I could get behind Ji-yeong's butt (so to speak). It was cute, perky, had a nice slope that I brushed over with my hand before I positioned myself, and it framed the pussy I was about to split open in a really pretty way.

I placed my hand on her hip; she flinched, but nestled back into my grip while I lined up that juicy dick of mine to drive back into her.

Then I understood: She'd flinched.

More than that, she was stiff all over, barely moving. "You okay?" I asked.

"Yeah fine," she said, voice clipped.

"You sure?"

"Yeah just put it in already, go."

Yeah, that wasn't happening. I moved away from Ji-yeong's rear and over to her side. She immediately loosened up, sinking onto her stomach. I laid down next to her.

"Sorry," she said. She sounded low.

"It's okay," I said. "I'd rather you be comfortable."

"But I should be comfortable with that, shouldn't I? You'd think if I trusted you enough to let you pin me by the wrists, I'd let you...do me from behind like a normal person."

"I just want you to have a good time with me, Ji-yeong," I said. "I'm not here to fix you."

"You know, you said something like that before, yet you've been doing a pretty good job of it so far."

"Yeah, but if I'm the x factor here, then what are you going to do when I'm not around? When you get bored of me? Or if I do something that I can't fix with an apology?"

Despite the heavy nature of our conversation, my boner was still pretty solid—not raging, but there was no way it could go completely soft when Ji-yeong was naked and next to me. That made me not want to ask this question and risk ruining the night...but...

"Look," I said, "I get the feeling this is a sore subject for you, but—"

"You think I should see a therapist."

I opened my mouth to say "Yes, absolutely," but stopped and considered just how much she liked being told what she needed over the past few weeks. "I think you're a grown woman, you're going to do what you like, and because you're you, you're going to figure something out. But what I'm wondering is why you're so resistant to the idea."

"Because I don't need it." Simple and polite, appreciative even. Maybe I could get through this without her telling me to go fuck myself.

"I'm not saying you do. It's just, like...you've been through this really intense experience that many women don't even survive. You can work through that baggage on your own, sure, but if you could have an expert guide you through it, wouldn't you want that?"

She nodded. Still didn't seem like she was about to get defensive; I counted my blessings.

"You know what it is?" she finally said. "The way I see it...the way I can't help but see it, people go to therapy because there's something broken within them that they can't fix, whether they were born with the damage or something damaged them. Most of my life, I've been looking after myself, and I've been pretty good at it. If I see a therapist for this, it means Chad changed me. It means he won. And I know that's not true, or that it shouldn't matter or whatever. But I just...he can't take that from me, Pete. He just can't."

I nodded. Throughout that whole speech, Ji-yeong didn't shed a single tear. This wasn't some emotional revelation for her. This was her truth, and I'll be damned if I was going to change it so easily. All the same, there was one sticking point in her story I felt I needed to address. I probably didn't have to tell my own shitty truth to do so...but if I'm being honest, it was going to make me feel better.

"Remember when I told you that there were a lot of reasons I broke up with my first girlfriend, Bernadette?"

"Yeah."

"Well, we were planning to do the long distance thing, and then about a month before we're set to leave for college, she breaks up with me at a random dinner. Out of nowhere."

"That's awful."

I nodded, rolling onto my back, staring at the fabric ceiling of our little love fort. "Bernadette was...everything. We were perfect for each other. I convinced myself that we were getting married after school. But she was thinking beyond that. NYU was going to be a fresh start for her, and she felt she needed to take that chance to grow in ways that she couldn't while she was still attached to me. And you know what? After a few weeks at school, I realized she was totally right. We wouldn't have survived, and if I didn't act like a child at that dinner we both would've started college with a whole lot less weight on our shoulders.