Sugar Heart Ch. 03

He rang my order through without a word from either of us, dropping the coins into the register tray. Just before I stepped away, I discreetly blew him a kiss. He bit his lip bashfully, glanced around, and then quickly reached up a hand to catch the invisible kiss. I nearly laughed out of sheer delight.

Buddy was stuck at the register as more customers filed in behind me, and it was one of his female co-workers who ended up calling my name and handing me my coffee. She glanced down at the cup and then at me, knowingly. She looked as if she were barely keeping back a giggle. Instead of being embarrassed, I grinned hugely, took my cup, and eagerly looked for my name. The heart above the "i" had grown in size, and now had a tiny arrow through it. Below was printed, "XOXOX". I clutched the cup like a found treasure, giving the girl one more grin before my eyes searched out Buddy again. I was desperate to claim those hugs and kisses.

I settled into a comfortable armchair within sight of his work area and sipped my coffee leisurely. Watching him work was a pleasure, especially when he shot me little smiles throughout the evening. I marvelled at how fluent his speaking was for most of his time at the cash register. He seemed to cope better the more routine the verbal exchange was, so taking countless beverage orders and collecting payment was smooth and easy for him almost without exception. I theorized that when he didn't have to think as much about what he was saying, he was less likely to stutter. It made a customer service job like this possible, but a random social conversation a challenge for him. I appreciated at a deeper level now how much mental fortitude it had taken for him to approach me here the other day with the cookies. I regretted being so aloof, caught up in my own selfish misery. He'd been so brave... so darling. I looked down at my cup and smiled adoringly.

The hours slipped by me, and the place began to empty before I even noticed how late it had gotten. It was about five minutes to closing time, and most of the staff were moving through routine cleanup duties, when Buddy slipped out from behind the counter, tucked himself into the little alcove that led to the washrooms, and peeked back at me, beckoning surreptitiously for me to follow him. I licked my lips, set my cup down, and stood to go after him. My heart seemed to be attached to him by a string, pulling me along.

He passed by the men's and ladies', and pushed open the door of the gender-neutral, disabled washroom. I ducked in behind him, and he locked the door. We stared at each other, breathing hard, and he came forward finally, pushing me back against the wall and reaching up to me with his lips parted. I kissed him immediately, wrapping my arms around his fragile little body. He clung to me, hanging from my neck, and I breathed in the now familiar scent of him as I slid my lips slowly against his, tasted him. I didn't push, extra cautious now of scaring him off, but even the lightest kiss with Buddy thrilled me in dizzying ways.

He leaned back a little to examine my face, and I smiled at him, briefly kissing his dear little snub nose. He grinned, and took a breath to speak. His mouth struggled to find the right syllables. I waited patiently, and then noticed there was a light switch next to my shoulder. I flicked it, flooding the room with pure darkness, knowing it would help him overcome his stutter a little. I heard him exhale, and then he kissed my cheek and rested his head against my chest.

"I'm sorry," he sighed.

"What for?"

"I dunno... everything," he whispered. "I feel so... silly. I... I almost threw away those stupid pancakes."

"They weren't stupid!" I whispered back urgently. "Buddy, they were incredible!"

He sighed again, squeezing me a little. "You're really nice."

"I'm nice? Buddy... there's no one nicer in the world than you!"

"Oh... I feel so lame! And Bernie told me you were... asking about me. I can only imagine how I must have made you feel. I didn't mean to... ditch you. I had to get home and take my meds this morning. Anti-anxiety stuff. It helps me... function. Not that I wasn't still... anxious... most of the day. Ugh. And the phone... I'm so sorry I couldn't talk. Please don't think I didn't want to talk to you-it wasn't personal. I just... I don't do phones. I can't. It's a mental block. I can't talk on the phone. I'm so sorry if I hurt your feelings. I should have at least texted you. But then I kept feeling stupid about this or that, and thinking everything I'd done was so lame, and that you couldn't possibly want me around!"

"Oh... Buddy... you're so hard on yourself, and you really shouldn't be," I whispered, hugging him closer. "Of course I want you around. Everything you've done for me is beautiful... just beautiful!"

"Oh..." he breathed. He nuzzled against me and smelled my shirt. "Mmm. Richard. Richard... I... I know I'm too neurotic. Bernie was saying to me the other day... I may not be going to school and getting beat up anymore, but instead I'm... beating myself up... and that's even worse. I'm... trying to be better. I think I can be better. I mean... years have gone by, and I was never able to talk to you... but when I saw you in your car last night, in a panic... I didn't even think about it. I just went over and helped you. I felt more sure of myself than I had in a long time. Maybe... ever."

I kissed the top of his head. It hadn't escaped my notice that he hadn't stuttered once during the times he was helping me through emotional meltdowns. "You were a rock," I whispered. "You were amazing."

He let out a trembling breath and rubbed his cheek against my shoulder. "Richard... I like you so much. I... I don't want you to think that when I... helped you... it was for some... ulterior motive... like, to get close to you. I mean, I do want to be close to you, but... that wasn't why I helped you. But... I just... ohh man, this is so hard..." He sighed harshly. "Richard. Are you... are you going to ask me out, or not?"

I stifled a laugh and grinned, feeling tingly all over. "Buddy." I slid my hands up his back, his neck, and finally cupped both of his cheeks. "I'm crazy about you. I love every moment with you, and when I'm not with you, I'm dreaming of you. Please, please, please be my boyfriend...?"

He made a throaty, gleeful noise and grabbed my shirt in tight, excited handfuls. "Ohh... that's even better!" he gushed, clamping his arms tightly around my neck. "I mean, yes-yes, yes! Yes a hundred times! Oh-Richard! Are we a couple now? My boyfriend!"

My cheeks began to ache from smiling. I hugged him hard enough to lift him off the floor. "My boyfriend! Yeah-we're a couple!"

"Can we tell everybody? Can we be... public? If you need more time, it's okay!"

"No-I mean, yes, I'm ready! I want everyone to know."

He kissed my neck, my cheek, and then my lips. I kissed him back, slowly, carefully. His breathing ramped up quickly, and he drew back, panting.

"Is... this okay?" I whispered, wanting to kiss him more, to kiss him deeper, to kiss him for hours, but I was remembering what Bernie had said about him being skittish ("like a li'l squirrel") and needing to move at his own pace.

"Oh... it's so nice," he breathed tremulously. "Kissing you is so good."

"Do you... want more...?"

"Oh... yes! Can I...?" he gasped. "I just don't want to, um... I don't want to... push. There are... a lot of things I'd like to do. I feel so... ohh... you can't even know how much I'm feeling. Richard... I don't want to freak you out!"

"I don't think you could possibly freak me out," I assured him. "I mean it. Go nuts, Buddy-let loose. I'm all yours. You're my whole world, you know that? The speed we move at is in your hands."

He breathed raggedly. His hands reached out to bravely explore my chest and abs. He felt out my shoulders, and my biceps. His hands were warm and very friendly. They hooked around my neck once more, and then he pushed up firmly against me with his whole body, forcing me against the wall again. His hips met mine without hesitation now, and he rocked them slowly in a very deliberate motion that flooded my whole body with irresistible lust. My mouth fell open involuntarily, and in moments, Buddy's tongue had slid into it. I groaned, sealing my mouth over his and indulging in the hot, wet, blissfully intimate sensation of our tongues twining together. Licking, sucking, devouring, we feasted on each other, and in no time I was hard as steel.

I groaned deeply; my erection was trapped painfully against my thigh, straining, and I soon had to reach a hand down inside my boxers to adjust it, letting it flip up against my belly. Buddy gasped and pressed himself harder against me, rocking faster now, and I could feel his own hardness, small but unmistakeable; he was rubbing it against mine, and the sensation was pure magic. The kiss broke off with a wet smack-Buddy was now focusing all of his attention on what his pelvis was doing. We both panted as if running a marathon. I noticed he was pushing up onto his tiptoes to keep in alignment with me, so I widened my stance and shifted down the wall a little, putting our hips at equal height. He sucked in a deep breath and slipped one of his thighs between mine, taking advantage of every opportunity to get closer to me.

I could scarcely believe this was happening. Sweet little Buddy, who had been so timid all these years, was dry humping me aggressively. I leaned back against the wall, groaning again, blissfully letting him use me as his toy. If he kept this up much longer, I was going to need a change of clothes.

"Don't... stop..." I grunted.

He pressed his face into the crook of my neck, thrusting ever more eagerly. He began to make small, desperate, keening noises, and for a few moments I thought he was sobbing. He tensed up all over, jerked several times, and then slowly relaxed, sagging against me as he fought to catch his breath. His body was scorching hot in my hands.

"Did you just...?" I gasped.

"Y-yeah," he mumbled, his voice muffled against my neck.

"Buddy... I was so close."

"Mmmm..." One of his hands slid down my side, and gently brushed over the outline of my throbbing organ.

"Yes!" I whispered urgently. "Please!"

He felt me out more firmly, squeezing, stroking. "Ohh... you're so huge! Richard... whoa..."

The action of his hand drew moans from my throat, and I forgot we were supposed to be quiet. His free hand suddenly clamped over my mouth, and somehow this ramped up my pleasure. He rubbed eagerly at my bulge, and it didn't take long for me lose control. I thrust against his touch, arched, and groaned, spasming frantically as I felt a release of hot cum surge over my lower belly, soaking my boxers and probably more. His hand left my mouth, but his other continued to pet me as my body calmed. The dark room was filled with our breathing.

"S-still not freaked out?" Buddy stammered.

"Hell no!" I whispered, stroking his hair affectionately. "That was... epic!"

We held each other for a minute or two, warm and happy in our post-orgasmic cocoon.

"Oh... we've been in here a while," he observed.

"Yeah. And I'm... sticky."

We both stifled a laugh.

"I'm gonna turn the light on, okay?" I whispered.

"Okay."

The light blazed, blinding us momentarily. When we recovered, we gazed at one another in mixed wonder and impish glee. I finally looked down at myself, adjusting my clothes a little. I'd gotten my boxers, part of my t-shirt, and a few spots on my jeans.

"Whew... what a mess," I chuckled. "Um... I'm gonna need to clean up a little."

"Okay." He shifted around, checking his own pants. He didn't seem to have made quite as much of a mess, but he looked a little uncomfortable. "Uh... you, uh... clean up... and head out first. I'll... stay a little longer. I'll just... s-say I was... stocking provisions in here, or... something."

I agreed to this and started grabbing handfuls of tissue from a roll. Buddy turned away demurely while I attempted to mop up the sticky mess I'd made that was by now getting unpleasantly cold. When I'd done the best job I could, I turned to face him. "Can you tell?"

He turned to me and chewed on his lip as he looked me over. "Mmm... n-not really. Maybe... a little? But then I... I... I know what you've been... up to."

Again we held back laughter. I gave him a little kiss, and went to listen at the door to make sure no one was nearby. I shot him a quick smile before slipping out into the corridor and shutting the door behind me. I stepped out into the main area of the shop, hoping I didn't look like someone who had just been humping in a public washroom.

It was well past closing time, and I was the only non-employee left in the shop. Two girls were moving chairs and wiping tables. They both stopped and looked straight at me with undisguised amusement. Did they know? Did everyone know? I paused a moment, blushing intensely, and then continued walking. I decided that I didn't really care if people knew we'd been up to dickens, except that Buddy could potentially get into trouble with his boss. The way his co-workers were looking at me, though, I had the distinct sense that none of them would want to let Buddy get into trouble.

My coffee cup was still sitting where I'd left it-the girls seemed to have deliberately avoided clearing it away. I smiled gratefully and grabbed it, again looking at the "XOXO" written there and feeling a warm little thrill. I had perhaps a dozen or more cups littering the interior of my car, and I knew it was ridiculous to want to keep them all-Buddy was my boyfriend now, and I could ask him to write on something for me anytime I wanted!-but I would at least keep this one forever. The cup that marked the day we'd become an item.

"Are you waiting for Buddy?" one of the girls asked me.

I looked up, slightly dazed. "Yeah," I said breathlessly. "Do you mind? I'll wait outside if you need me to."

"No, it's okay." She smiled widely.

"You guys are soooo adorable," sighed the other girl, the one who had served me my coffee.

"Thanks," I chuckled, cradling my empty cup. I took a deep breath and felt a surge of pride I couldn't hold back. "He's my boyfriend!"

Both girls squealed simultaneously.

"He doesn't talk about it, but he's totally been crushing on you forever-everyone knows, and we've been speculating on when you two might finally get together!" one of them said animatedly.

"You're so cute, I seriously can't even!" gushed the other. "You guys make me believe in love."

"He makes me believe in love," I said bashfully, beaming as they continued to melt and practically die over our transcendent adorableness. This was immeasurably better than being told I was making inappropriate lifestyle choices, or called a faggot. The world was beginning to seem much less cold and unfriendly than it had just a couple of days ago, when I would almost have rather swerved my car into oncoming traffic than face another day.

Buddy emerged, looking innocent as a babe and carrying a trash bag as if all he'd been doing was tidying the washrooms. Many glances were exchanged all around, but no words, as everyone went about their regular closing duties.

Buddy finally came to me, carrying a backpack slung over one shoulder. I could feel eyes watching us as we stepped out into the parking lot.

"Your co-workers are nice," I remarked.

"Yeah," he agreed, softly bumping shoulders with me as we walked close together, although his shoulder was more at the level of my bicep. "Money's not... super great... but it's a p-pleasant enough place to work. Everyone's been very... p-p-p-... patient with me. In many ways... working here has been like... a s-sort of exposure therapy... for my social anxiety. I feel like I've... c-c-c-come a long way."

"I'm really proud of you." I took his hand gently, and he immediately laced his fingers through mine. We slowed our pace as we reached my car, unsure what was to come next.

"Was, um... was wh-whhhat we did in the bathroom... okay?" he asked uncertainly.

I took a deep, satisfying breath, still feeling some residual endorphins flowing through me. "'Okay' doesn't even begin to describe it," I chuckled. "I mean... assuming you don't get in trouble... it was pretty much the best thing ever." I leaned closer to him, lowering my voice to a whisper. "That was so much more intense than I even expected sex to be, and we still had all our fucking clothes on!"

He giggled and pulled me into a hug immediately, pressing his face into my shoulder. I held him close and leaned against my car. He looked up at me with a playful grin.

"Cutie pie," I whispered, making him grin even wider and look even cuter. "So what do you want to do?"

"Um... well... I sort of... b-b-b-brought overnight things... j-just in case."

"Oh-that's great!" I exclaimed, feeling both relieved and excited. "I'd love you to stay over again."

He pressed his hands against my chest and massaged me a little. "I made sure to... b-bring my meds and everything... so I won't need to run off. And t-tomorrow I don't have to work."

"Ohhh," I groaned softly, holding him close. "So I can have you all to myself for the whole day?"

He nodded eagerly, and then bit his lip, reining in his emotions a little. "If... you want...?"

"I want!" I replied wholeheartedly. "Want to ride with me, or meet me there?"

"With you. My c-car can stay here." He kissed my cheek and went around to the passenger side, climbing in and dropping his backpack between his feet.

I placed my newest cup in my cupholder and turned to smile at my boyfriend before driving off. Buddy didn't talk during the trip, but a few blocks along, he placed his hand softly on my thigh.

"Ohh... hi there," I breathed.

His hand began to slide up and down, slowly.

"Careful," I warned with a low chuckle. "I've already defiled my pants once tonight."

His hand stilled, but he left it on my leg. "Wh-when we get inside... would you... take them off?"

I looked down at him as we stopped at a red light. "Yes."