Sweet Gwendoline Ch. 13

I love you slavery and whipping stories. But I quit reading Gwendolyn when Mrs. Brie was shot. This is getting ridiculous.

Some conversations happen "off camera". Mrs. Brie would certainly tell Gwen that most people cannot be told about her non-human status, but I didn't cover that in this chapter. It might be referenced later in a flashback.

As for blood smears...there will be a lot of those...far too many to clean up before the police arrived. CSI will have a field day with that....especially when you consider the fact that Mrs. Brie's blood isn't human.....it's very similar to human, but with anomolies that the crime scene techs won't be able to make sense of.

Possibly this is a plot point that will become relevant in future chapters.

It seems like there should have been some discussion in the SUV about who it is OK to share this info with. Certainly not Julie, but what about Lyndsay?

Also, she left her blood all over the floor and there would be a blood smear where she got up and attacked again. CSI would love to do an episode on that crime scene.

Hi there, thanks again for another great chapter. At first i was a bit afraid of where this might go, but gradually i have the advantage of knowing you as a writer and being fully confident that our Gwen wouldn't remain with such a horrible man.

I have had some computer problems as well lately with files having gone up in thin air. I am not writing much at the time, but i know that the only solution is to start over again with the certainty that it is nearly impossible to write exactly the same story again, if directly from the heart.

That was different! Love it! Luscious second half with her the only one naked again... mmmmm

I'm not sure how to feel about Mrs. Brie as a succubus. It makes me think too much of another of your stories: "My life is different". But I am intrigued enough to continue reading.

Thoroughly enjoyed as always even with the strange beginning and the twist. LOVED THE TWIST btw

What a twist, but an interesting one, learning of your computer problems is very sad, but I do hope that you are able to continue writing without such errors. Your skills as a writer definitely did save the whiplash, as mention in the previous comments. I look forward to how this tale continues

Hi Schlank.

I'm really sorry to hear about your computer issues. I know the pain of what you're describing (I don't write on this site, but I do elsewhere and have had similar issues in the past). I couldn't remember the eye part from the previous chapter, but I'm glad to hear that there were plans/seeding of the plot elements. It did jump out at me as a bit of an odd change, but I think the oddity of it stood out more because of the previously described issues.

Don't worry though. You're still a very talented writer, and this chapter still has a lot going for it, especially in the back half. As always I look forward excitedly to future instalments in this (and your other stories), so don't be disheartened ^_^

I wrote the previous comment just before going to bed, and I do worry it came off harsher than I intended it to. So, I apologise for that.

Good luck going forward (and more Lyndsay is always appreciated ^_^)

I apologize for the way this chapter began. This is not the way I initially wrote the chapter.

However, I was the victim of serious computer problems, and the original version of the story got eaten by a computer virus. The second version of the story got lost when my computer crashed, and I had to borrow a computer from a friend and start all over again a third time.

So, the reason that the opening to this chapter felt rushed, is because it was rushed. I was frustrated, angry and stressed out, and felt cheated that hours and hours of work was stolen from me. Rather than work up gradually to Gwen's abduction, I just shoved her into Darcy's basement right at the very beginning of the chapter.

I apologize for that. I feel that the narrative-whiplash I put my fans through, make this chapter not up to my normal standards, however my computer problems seem to be (hopefully) over for the moment, and abrupt, jarring story changes like this won't happen again.

I'd been planning the plot twist with Mrs. Brie ever since Chapter 7. The spooky way that her eyes changed color when she was angry, and the way that her husband was always on the east coast was mentioned back in November, but never elaborated on until now. I wasn't really sure WHEN I'd do the big reveal, until I wrote this chapter.

Again, I apologize for the way the chapter opened. I think you would have enjoyed the first draft better. The first draft opened up at the Vineyard,and had some excellent dialog between Gwen and Doctor Riemen. There was also some excellent dialog between Gwen and Lyndsay when Gwen tells Lyndsay about Josephine Angel.

But the first draft is forever lost. It was eaten by a computer virus. I'll never see it again. I was WAY too frustrated to attempt to write it all over again,exactly as it was, and I sort of forced myself to write something, before another computer problem once again destroyed my ability to publish.

Hopefully nothing like this ever happens again.