Thankful

Out of reflex, I reached out and latched on to Kelly's hand as she had the misfortune to be standing beside me.

"Easy," her voice reached into my panic. "Easy. I've got you. You're safe."

I looked up into concerned eyes, all but hyperventilating. She was lying. I knew she was. I wasn't safe. None of us were safe. We were all going to die.

The elevator jerked to a halt and I closed my eyes as my breath caught. First would come the jerking halt, then would come the long fall. Then would come the splat as we were reduced to a stew of blood and meat, indiscernible one from the other.

Only the fall didn't come.

Instead, Kelly's hand was tugging at me. I opened my eyes to see Olivia holding the door, scowling at me. Only Kelly and I were left inside.

I almost knocked Kelly aside getting out and immediately fell to my knees, gasping with relief to be out of the death trap.

"How the hell do you expect to go to space if you can't even ride in an elevator?" Olivia japed.

"Fuck you, Olivia," I snapped.

"Stop it. Both of you," Kelly said. "Nick are you all right? Can you get your breath?"

Kelly knelt down, our noses almost touching. Her eyes drew me in as I felt her hands close on each of mine. I felt some of the panic begin to ebb away as my breathing slowed.

"We should get out of the hall," Olivia said.

"I'm aware," Kelly said, looking around nervously.

I became aware that the elevator had disgorged another load of people who were passing us, looking at us curiously, as they chattered merrily.

"Sorry," I said, rising to my feet.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," Kelly said. "A phobia isn't rational, but it is real. Are you all right to find Uncle Billy and the rest? Or do you need another minute?"

"I'm good," I said. "Now, at least. Thank you."

"You're welcome."

I began to have a glimmer that I might have been wrong about Kelly. Given a prime opportunity to make fun of me, she not only hadn't but had shut Olivia up instead.

"So, where are we going?" I asked.

"I have no idea," Olivia sneered at me. "We sort of lost track of everybody else, thanks to you."

I started to snap back but remembered Laurell's conversation from the night before. And the understanding that Uncle Billy had caused to wash through me over dinner.

"Thank you for taking care of me, Olivia," I said instead. "I'm sorry I held us up. Let's go find the others."

Olivia's face looked as if I'd just hit her between the eyes with a bat.

"Uh, no problem," Olivia finally managed. "They, uh, they were going this way, last I saw."

As we walked along the long hallway filled with people, I noticed that Kelly seemed to be somehow physically shrinking in on herself. Inspired by her easing my own fear, I reached out and took her hand. The look she shot me from behind her curtain of hair was sheer gratitude as her other hand joined the first to hold onto mine.

Olivia was looking in doorways as we passed. Still, I think we might have walked right past it if not for Uncle Billy's distinctive voice rising above the babble at just the right moment. Olivia stepped inside and glanced around then turned to us with a nod.

"Here they are," Olivia said.

Then her eye dropped to where Kelly was clutching my hand with both of hers and her habitual scowl spread across her face.

The only reason we'd managed to hear Uncle Billy's voice over the din was that... well, he was Uncle Billy. The sound of the twenty or thirty people in the room was an almost palpable force we had to push past to enter. It may have just been my imagination, but the sound of conversation seemed to die more than just a little as Kelly and I entered.

My shoulder was almost yanked out of socket as Kelly froze in the doorway. I suspect she might have bolted as more faces turned our way except for a crowd of people passed behind her just then.

Unsure what to do or say in the face of her obvious panic, I fell back on the exact words she had used on me.

"Easy," I said. "Easy. I've got you. You're safe."

At the same time her eyes met mine, and some of the tension went out of her hands, Olivia stepped up and took one of her hands from mine.

"Me too," Olivia said, simply. "Let's go sit down by the glass."

So saying, Olivia proceeded to thread the needle through the rich and shameless. Several paused their conversations to look at us as we made our way through. Kelly's hand tightened painfully on mine as I brought up the rear of our little three-person chain.

When we made it to the seats, instead of doing the smart thing and moving all the way to the end, Olivia plopped down in the second seat on the front row, next to the glass. Looking back, I suppose her plan was that Kelly would take the seat next to the aisle, leaving me to move off elsewhere.

Instead, Kelly squeezed past, pulling me with her, to sit in the seat on the other side of Olivia where she slumped down and caught her breath. While still firmly holding my hand. At a loss what to do, I ignored Olivia's glare and took the seat Kelly's hand guided me to, between her and the wall.

The underwhelming joy of it all was there was still an hour, maybe a little less, to kickoff. It was going to be a long afternoon and evening.

Pris materialized from wherever she had been to take the seat on the aisle next to Olivia. A few minutes later, Uncle Billy swung down to speak to us. "Hey, y'all!" Uncle Billy boomed. "There's quite the spread up there where we are all visiting if you're hungry."

I glance around to see the glitterati milling around a banquet table. I didn't need to see what was on the table to predict I most likely wouldn't be able to eat any of it.

Kelly was shaking her head so hard it bid fair to twist off her shoulders.

"No, thanks, Uncle Billy," I said. "We're fine."

Uncle Billy's smile widened as he glanced at where Kelly still had yet to let go of my hand. It was most likely beyond his understanding that she would be afraid of the crowd he'd taken us into. Not that I was particularly wild about being around them all either, but at least I could breathe. His look made me uncomfortable enough I managed to retrieve that hand from her grasp.

Olivia was her usual oblivious self, sitting there with her arms crossed, breathing through her mouth. Pris was her usual self as well, craning her neck this way and that, popping up to look out the window, then sitting back down.

"Say, Kelly. You know that movie you were watching this morning? 'Princess Bride'? Well, it's on tonight again. You know. If you wanted to try to catch the ending you missed or something."

"Oh," Kelly said. "Thank you."

"No problem," I said.

For some reason, Pris glanced over at me, rolled her eyes, and shook her head. Olivia sneered past Kelly at me.

Well, if she didn't care, I didn't. And I was out of things to say. I rarely had even that much in common with either a jock or a beautiful girl, and Kelly was a double threat.

I wished, not for the last time, I'd had a better hiding place for my book. Maybe I should take up wearing boots. I bet I could probably smuggle a book each in the legs of a pair of roach killers. A couple of papers at least. Nah, I'd get away with it once before Mom and Pris would make me take them off and then I'd be stuck with a pair of boots. And, knowing Mom, she'd make me wear them.

"There's Laurell and Michelle!"

I glanced up at Priscilla's cry to see the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders in all their scantily clad glory prancing out onto the field. The fans, at least the male fans, went wild, of course. Just how Pris thought she could tell which of them were our cousins was beyond me.

Then I spotted her. There could be no mistaking that flowing mane of flame. Not with that metallic sheened tint to her skin. Tina. The distance to the field was too far to make out details, but I didn't need to. My memory blazed with them. Oh, how I lusted for her. Oh, how I loathed her.

My best guess was that the blondes on either side of her were most likely our elder cousins. The longer I looked, the surer I became. Pris was waving her arms over her head as if they might see her or something. To my surprise, the three raised their blue and silver pom-poms and waved their arms in imitation of Priscilla's movements. Maybe they could see her after all.

Several minutes later, the teams took the field and "went to war" as the saying went.

It was strange. I'd always assumed the people at live football games must be glued to the action on the field, cheering on their modern-day gladiators. While most of the fans in the stands below us seemed to be, the group in the room with us would wander down to the window from time to time, but mostly milled around in a Brownian movement, laughing and talking about most anything other than the game on the field. They almost seemed more interested in seeing, and being seen by, each other than what was happening on the field.

For myself, I wasn't any more interested in seeing or being seen by them than I was the game, and I couldn't have cared any less about the game.

Someone's stomach growled loudly and I glanced over to see Kelly blushing.

"Are you hungry?" I asked.

Kelly glanced back, for perhaps the first time since we'd taken our seats, and quickly shook her head.

"I'll get you something," I said. "Is there anything you can't or won't eat?"

"Um, no. No, anything's fine," Kelly said.

"All right. Back in a minute."

As I wandered up to the banquet laid out, I glanced around the room to see if I could spot the adults. None of the three seemed to be in the room, however. With my brow furrowed, I looked closer. Surely they wouldn't have brought us just to abandon us.

As I looked, I realized that people were wandering out, only to be replaced by new faces wandering in. While I generally didn't pay much attention to most people not being openly rude or belligerent towards me, I was pretty sure I would have noticed the guy in the ten-gallon hat hauling an oxygen tank around behind him.

Uncle Billy and Aunt Regina must have hauled Mom to another room to meet and greet other people of influence. Shrugging, I began looking for the food offerings.

I'd been right in my estimation that there would be nothing I could eat. It was a virtual cornucopia of deep fried or barbecued animal carcass. And I didn't have the first idea what Kelly might enjoy.

Pris, as usual, came to my rescue.

"You all right, Big Bro?"

"I don't know what to get for her," I shrugged at my towering sibling.

"Ah. Well, that's easy. Get a very little bit of anything that doesn't look too revolting or smell funny. She can work around stuff she doesn't like and still get filled up that way. As big and muscular as she is, it's probably better to double up on the proteins."

I glanced at the long table and looked back to her helplessly.

"Here," Pris said. "Take a plate and do what I do."

"Are you hungry too?" I asked, picking up a plate.

"Not me," Pris shook her head. "Olivia. But, she's hanging close to Kelly like a guard dog. And Kelly's nervous enough that I didn't think it would be good to take away her last security blanket. Speaking of which, you and Kelly seem to be getting along really well."

"I guess," I shrugged. "At least she hasn't laughed at me or shoved me in anything embarrassing yet. But, the day is still young, I suppose."

"I don't think she will," Pris said. "From watching her, and from what I've picked up from Michelle and Laurell, I get the feeling she's a sweet girl that's almost as scarred up emotionally as you. In fact, we think she's most likely waiting for you to make fun of her. Or say something means."

"I don't do that," I said. Pris burst out laughing. "What? I don't."

"Oh, please," Pris chuckled. "You do scathe better than anyone I've ever heard when you aren't impressed by someone's intelligence."

"Do not."

"Do too."

"Not."

Pris stuck her tongue out at me, then paused with the spoon halfway to the plate, her eyes going distant.

I tilted my head at Pris as her eyes narrowed and belatedly focused on listening.

"... looks like a Holstein cow," a woman nearby was saying. "And what do you bet that ugly, butch redhead next to her scowling at all of us is her lesbian lover?"

Something in my neck popped as I looked to see who was talking. And if they were talking about Kelly.

"I think that's enough, brother," Pris said loudly. "Something down at this end smells like rancid kitty litter. I can't tell if it's the food or someone's perfume."

I glanced at Pris to see her exchanging glares with the woman who'd been speaking.

"I thought I was the one who was supposed to be scathing," I whispered as we walked back down the shallow stairs.

"You are," Pris said, serenely. "I've just picked up a little bit here and there from watching you."

As I handed Kelly her plate, for some reason my eyes drifted to the woman and her friend. Both of them were looking at me. They might have been pretty, twenty years earlier. Suddenly I made the connection between what Priscilla had said about kitty litter and the catty remarks the woman had been making and snorted as I turned away to take my seat.

Pris handed off Olivia's plate and sailed elegantly back up the stairs. I almost felt sorry for the women, having some idea of just what might be heading their way. Almost. Not quite.

Kelly ate almost daintily but finished everything on the plate I'd brought her.

"Want more?" I asked.

"No, thank you."

"Want me to take your plate?"

Kelly blinked at me and in her eyes, I saw a guarded wariness that was all too familiar. Damn if Priscilla wasn't right again. But, she usually was when it came to explaining people to me.

"Yes, thank you," Kelly said. "And, sincerely. Thank you. All these people..."

"I understand," I smiled gently. "Sort of like me and the elevator."

Kelly nodded shyly.

"It's all right," I said. "Let me get it for you."

I looked at Olivia and paused as I wondered if she'd eaten her plate as well. Then I spotted it on the floor behind her feet. When I saw it, I wondered if she'd licked it clean.

Olivia grunted and looked at me suspiciously when I offered to take her plate as well.

I tossed the plates and looked around, but there was no sign of Pris or the two women I figured she was targeting. Then again, the herd was looking suspiciously thin on the ground. On the other hand, Mom and Aunt Regina had reappeared from wherever they had gone.

Feeling a need, and mortally certain anywhere there was a gathering this big there would have to be a restroom nearby, I wandered out into the hall. And discovered just where everyone had gone.

Not having been following the game, I hadn't realized it was closing in on halftime. And every mother's son and his dog was feeling the same need I was apparently.

I drifted up to the end of the line of men and waited. And waited. And waited some more as I gradually moved closer to my destination with agonizing slowness.

I managed to reach the said destination just in time to avoid an embarrassing incident.

"Damn, kid!" A voice behind me laughed as I stood there through two visitors to the urinal beside me.

When the stream finally stopped, I flushed and moved aside to make room for the next and set my mind to working out the logistics of surviving the crush to wash my hands and exit.

"Did you see that one huge bitch?" A voice was saying as I dried my hands. "Oh, shit! That's the guy what is with her. Damn, man! I thought you was her kid."

I glanced up from trying to move through the packed bodies to see a pair of chunky white kids, either high school or college, wearing FUBU, sideways baseball caps, and piles of thick gold chains.

Wonderful. Just peachy.

"Excuse me," I said as I moved to try to pass.

"Yo, maybe that bitch you is with needs a real man to take care of her," he said as he cupped his crotch.

I have absolutely no idea why I did what I did. But, I lost touch with my sanity for a moment. The only reason I survived my moment of insanity was most likely I surprised him as much as I surprised myself.

As if a passenger in my own body, I saw myself whip my fist into his abdomen, my knee into his crotch, and my forehead into his nose in rapid succession. When it was over, he was laying on his back with blood spreading from his flattened nose and a dark stain spreading across his crotch. I was standing over him, eyeing his friend.

"I don't know where you two are from," I heard myself say. "But, here in Texas, we don't talk about ladies like that. And we don't let anybody else talk like that where we can hear it. You tell your friend when he wakes up."

The friend of the guy on the ground looked at me stonily for a moment before his eyes flickered over my shoulder. Then, he nodded and stood aside so I could leave the room.

Out in the hallway, I reached for the wall to steady myself and had a belated panic attack. What the fuck was I thinking?! He could have, should have, torn me apart! Hell, a thirteen-year-old Girl Scout could kick my ass, as one proved during a misunderstanding involving a missing case of Thin Mints. That guy could have done much, much worse.

"You all right, son?"

"Uh, yeah." I straightened and turned to find a big man in an ill-fitting suit and a big brimmed cowboy hat eyeing me.

"Listen, I just wanted to shake your hand," he said. "I was in there and heard what that little punk said, same as everyone else. But, you were the only one who actually stepped up and did something about it. And, well, I just wanted to shake your hand, sir. Your folks should be proud."

As his huge ham of a hand engulfed mine, I couldn't help but think that, ironically, my father probably would have been. The thought made me feel vaguely nauseous.

"Matter of fact, if your folks are here, I'd like to meet them and shake their hand as well."

"Uh, well my Dad isn't," I said. "But, Mom is around here somewhere with Uncle Billy."

"Well, then. I'd like to meet your ma and your uncle and tell them what a fine man you are. Which way do you figure they are?"

Dazed and confused, I led the man along until I found our room by the blonde, brunette, and red heads lined up down next to the glass. Pris, it seemed, had returned from counting her social coup while I was embroiled in my more dubious one.

"Hey, D.D.!" Uncle Billy's familiar voice boomed. "Why is there a hole in the roof of Texas Stadium?"

"So God can watch his favorite team play," the man gripping my shoulder answered. "Wild Bill, are you the one this fine young man calls 'Uncle Billy'?"

Uncle Billy glanced at me and I saw his face run through several calculations before he, somewhat warily, admitted it was so. Mom and Aunt Regina drew up behind him, drawn by the way "D.D." was holding me in place, as if to keep me from slinking away.

For the next ten minutes, I watched a legend hatch from a rather dubious egg as I heard a recounting of what I only dimly recognized from my experience in the bathroom. The way D.D. told it, it sounded a whole lot better than what I'd actually done, starting with giving my little inane speech before I attacked. Not to mention making the cheap shots I'd thrown into something a little more "gentlemanly."

By the time he was done, Uncle Billy, Aunt Regina, and, surprisingly, Mom were all beaming at me and several people were slapping me on the back. I just wanted to melt through the floor.

And, truth be told, I was a little bit irritated.

Work to make neighbors and family safe using math and science they couldn't even begin to comprehend and they would ridicule your efforts on national television. But, kick a bully in the nuts in the bathroom for talking trash about a girl and, by God, you were really somebody.