The Cruise

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A cruise is all about enjoying yourself, isn't it?
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Even when I had good luck, it turned out that it was just life mockingly holding up a prize for me, and then pulling the rug from under my feet. Like Lucy pulling the football away from Charlie Brown at the last second.

This was maybe the worst mockery of all, though.

One of the clients of the company I worked for, was a cruise line. My company had gotten a good deal, and thus had offered a company wide sweepstakes where the top 20% from reviews for the year, was entered into the pool. And by some miracle, I happened to end up in the top 20%. By some larger miracle still, I got an email telling me I was the winner, getting a free cruise for two persons. Except the email arrived three days after I'd been dumped by my girlfriend. So it would most likely not be a cruise for two.

I considered for a while to see if I could lure any of my friends into coming with me, but eventually decided against it. Freshly dumped, I really didn't need to spend two weeks in a cramped cabin with someone while awkwardly hitting on them hoping for pitiful rebound sex.

Still, I was not one to turn down a free cruise. So I went by myself. It was three weeks later. Things still hurt, I was still confused, as well as a bit angry with how things had ended.

At least a two week vacation with all expenses paid had a decent chance of getting my mood sorted out.

As I walked up the covered gangway from the terminal, I decided to make the best of it all.

From the moment I crossed the threshold into the lobby of the ship, I would just let it all go. Stop thinking, and caring, and being glum, and rather just see what this vacation had to offer me. It was all about enjoying myself a little, wasn't it?

The transition of walking into the lobby of the ship helped. Coming from the plexiglass-covered gangway outside in the sunshine, the lobby seemed cavernous, with its dark wood panelling everywhere and muted lights.

The three queues seemed equally long. I joined the end of the one dead ahead without thinking much over my choice.

But as it turned out, that would make hell of a lot of difference.

I'd been standing and waiting for maybe half a minute, when someone fell into me.

There was a feminine scream, and by sheer reflex, I was able to turn just in time to catch a tumbling body from falling into the floor.

The girl in my arms was blushing profusely and stuttering excuses as I helped back to her feet.

"God, I'm so terribly sorry... I didn't see anything coming in, and I must have tripped. I didn't mean to..."

Her sunglasses were hanging from one ear. That was the first thing I noticed. The second thing I noticed was her eyes. Well, her one eye at least, over the rim of the sunglasses I could see an interesting greyish-green kind of colour. Like nothing I'd seen before. Dirty blonde hair, a bit in a mess framed her face neatly.

My mouth was working before my brain could even get into gear, as so often happened. "Oh please... It was a pleasure getting bumped into."

I couldn't help but notice that one of my hands were still at her side, not yet having let go of her. And one of her hands were resting on my arm.

She looked bemused at my comment, but thank the gods, she laughed, although a bit nervously.

"Well, it was nice to bump into you, then. I'm Marie."

She offered the hand that had been resting on my arm.

"I'm Daniel. Nice to meet you."

I shook her hand. It was small and nimble in mine. A tad cool to touch, but that might just be due to me always being on the warm end of things.

We chatted casually as we waited. I'd forgotten how that worked, having been caught up in a relationship for a long while. The initial chat with a beautiful girl, where you tried to leave a good impression and seem interested as well as interesting. But my brain was on my side for once, starting to neatly file away info as soon as something was offered.

She was Marie. She had a bit of an accent, but not a lot of it. She was originally Danish, but was a master's student in ecology, focusing on the impact of climate change. Cruises were normally not something a student could afford, but her grandparents were joining the cruise from some port a few days sailing away, and had used the chance to spoil her, bringing her along.

She was the kind of person it was easy to talk with. She seemed interested in every word I had to say.

The minutes of waiting time flew past, and the lady behind the counter soon waved me forward.

"Sir? Miss? Are you two together?"

"Oh... Sorry ma'am. But a man can wish..."

My treacherous brain shrugged. That was all my mouth working on its own.

Marie giggled, giving me a quizzical look, covering her mouth with her ticket. Her eyes were unable to hide the smile though, and she gave me a look up and down as I stepped up to the counter.

"Maybe not yet. But why don't you meet me at the bar later, and we can discuss that while you buy me a drink?"

"Around nine?" I asked, baffled, while handing my ticket over to the lady behind the counter, getting checked in.

"Around nine."

This vacation was starting to look interesting already.

* * *

Around nine didn't happen, as my usual luck would have it.

Dining was arranged by cabin and floor in order to accommodate all passengers in the limited dining rooms. And for my cabin number, it meant that dinner was served at eight.

I'd tried to consider my options for getting in touch with Marie, telling her I'd be late, but I really had nothing to go on. I had her first name, and that was it. Calling the front desk was of no help. The person I spoke to was not willing to give me a cabin number to someone simply by their first name, and knowing they had checked in moments after me.

Having not eaten since the quite terrible sandwich that came out of a wending machine at the terminal for lunch of sorts, I was famished, and had no choice but to attend, otherwise I'd starve. Subsiding on snacks alone would not cut it. I needed proper food.

The prize I'd won included four course dinners. Yet again luck mocked me, as I had to make my way through tiny portions that really didn't manage to fill me in any way.

I was seated at a table for eight. Making the minimum of polite conversation with the others at my table, while throwing dark looks at the clock.

After the third course had been served, and I'd wolfed it down, I excused myself, and left.

It still was well past nine thirty when I finally made my way to the bar. I couldn't believe my bad luck of free luxurious meals had left me running the risk standing up a girl.

The bar was already half full by the time I got there. I looked around, hoping to see Marie somewhere, but had no such luck.

I sat down at the bar, wondering what I might have been in a past life to have earned my karma. Professional puppy-kicker at a travelling circus, most likely.

I ordered a scotch, handed the bartender my key-card and told him to open a check for me.

"Sir, the system tells me your ticket is all inclusive. Just show the key-card at any bar, and it's no charge."

Well. At least my prize would allow me a generous flow of alcohol. So I had that going for me. Which was nice.

I wasn't precisely sure how long I'd been at the bar for. Glass and a half of scotch, that was all I knew for sure. That, on top of the three glasses of wine that had come with dinner had left me nice and mellowed out. It was around the halfway mark of the second glass of scotch, that I saw Marie further down the bar, ordering a drink. I was on my feet and over by her side in seconds.

"There you are. I'm so sorry I wasn't able to be here by nine."

Marie jumped.

"Oh. God. You scared me!"

"I'm sorry. Look, let me get that for you."

I handed the bartender my key as he put the drink down on the bar.

Marie looked at me, and was about to say something.

I cut her off.

"Dining arrangements. Turns out I wasn't allowed to eat until eight. Didn't manage to get out of there to make it 'til nine."

"Oh. I didn't know..."

"Yeah. Sorry. And there was no way of getting in touch with you. So I couldn't exactly give you any warning."

"You couldn't even drop by here and leave a message with the bartender?"

The bartender's eyebrow cocked up, before he decided that he needed to be polishing glasses at the far end of the bar.

"I... didn't think of that."

She smiled at me, but there was a bit of insecurity to her smile.

"I had 45 minutes to wait for some guy who'd flirted briefly with me at check in, Daniel. I guessed I had been stood up."

She paused, her eyes darting towards the booths further back in the bar.

"Look. I need to go to the bathroom. Watch my drink for me, and I'll be back soon? I just need a moment."

She whisked away. As she left, I used the chance to get a good look at her from behind.

Short, black skirt that showed her toned legs, and a loose-fitting top lightly sweeping back and forth as she walked away. Her dirty blond hair hanging free.

She also had a tremendous butt. Not the kind that had been sculpted in a gym by doing squats, but rather something as rare as a naturally full thing that came from her also having some truly stunning hips. Hiker's legs, I decided. It was the kind of legs you got from plenty of walking.

"Excuse me. Could you kindly not bother that particular young lady?"

This time it was me jumping from a voice coming out of nowhere all the sudden.

The sight had distracted me enough to not notice that someone had walked up beside me.

"I'm sorry?"

The guy next to me was... well, it was hard to pin down. Aloof would be a good word. Not the haughty kind of self importance where you put yourself above caring, but rather an air of relaxed casualness.

"Would you be so kind as to not bother that particular young lady, please? I'm rather enjoying her company at the moment."

His phrasing was maybe a bit on the verbose side, with overbearing decorum. But he still had an air of earnestness behind it, as though he meant every word he said.

"Uh..."

The penny dropped. He was enjoying her company? So that was why she hadn't been at the bar when I showed up. She'd been swept away by this upper class twit of the year, back in the booths.

"Look, I'm sorry. It's not what you think. I was supposed to meet her here, except I was delayed."

I paused. My brain and my mouth was not entirely agreeing on where things were supposed to be going. And something in the primal part of my brain, where the caveman instincts lived, insisted that some fighting words would be a good choice from here on out.

"Oh. So you are the one who stood her up and left her crestfallen then?"

"What? No! I got held up by dinner! I got here as soon as I could."

"Ah. I see." The words fit his manner perfectly. Tiny bit reserved, yet casual. I wasn't quite able to place his accent. English, maybe. But that could just be the civility of his tone. "And now here you are."

"Yes. Here I am."

The caveman wanted the words to be harsh. But they came out of my mouth in my more Charlie Brown like mutedness realizing that the football had been pulled away at the nick of time once again.

"Then it seems we have a bit of a problem on our hands."

Yet again, not a trace of hostility, or really much else in his voice. He just simply stated the obvious. Seemingly inhumanly relaxed about it. My thoughts went to various depictions of vampires, and the ways all the sparkly modern emo ones seemed to all be the same kind.

Still, I kind of admired the indifference. I wished I could simply state that obviously the two of us were now very interested in the attention of Marie, without all the emotions I could feel welling inside of me.

Fuck. I wished I could have had a bit of distance to things as well, instead of feeling all downhearted over a bit of competition over the first girl I'd hit on in years.

Wasn't that what I'd been telling myself earlier that day? To stop thinking, and caring, and being glum, and just make the best of things.

"Well. Let's see if we can't find a solution to our problem then. Together. What's your drink?"

For the first time, the other guy seemed to be taken aback, losing a bit of his aloofness to all things around him.

"Mine's a gin and tonic," he answered. "cheers." he added, slightly uncertain.

I signaled for the bartender, ordering a fresh glass of scotch for myself and a gin tonic for my new acquaintance.

"I'm Daniel, by the way."

"Brandon. Pleased, I'm sure."

The words were rehearsed, civil.

I grabbed my drink, and the yellow-tinted cocktail smelling faintly of pineapple that Marie had left, and motioned towards the booths.

Brandon shrugged, picked up his glass, and led the way.

"Oh. I see you've met."

Marie's voice was cautious, as she eyed us.

"Look..." she began, looking for the words.

"Yeah. I gathered the facts." I cut her off, getting up to offer her a chance to get into the somewhat narrow booth. "Brandon here found you stood up and all by yourself at the bar, while I was held hostage by waitstaff failing to provide more than a mouthful per plate."

Marie elegantly slid into the seat, and scooted into the middle of the booth, leaving me and Brandon on opposite sides of her.

"Now the easy thing for me to do, would be to just walk away. But where's the fun in that?"

I cocked an eyebrow, as I got into my seat again.

"Now. Instead of just slinking away in the night, I thought we'd at least have a few words. After all, we're gonna be on this ship for the next two weeks, and we're bound to bump into one another time and again. So I thought it would be good to keep things from being too awkward."

Marie looked at me, slightly puzzled. If Brandon had any emotion, he didn't show it.

"Let's not pretend things are more than they are. The two of us flirted a bit during check-in, and I failed to show up. Apparently you've started to get to know Brandon here in my absence, seemingly a very fine option to what I'd have to offer had I been here on time. So instead of making things awkward and dramatic and all that, how about we have a few drinks, as ordinary people, and just leave it at that?"

Brandon gave half a shrug, his indifference having grown back. "I'll drink to that."

Marie looked from me, to Brandon, and back. "Why not. Here's to trying to keep things from being awkward."

It turned out that despite good intentions, things were a bit awkward, at first.

But Marie was still easy to talk with, even though we were three sharing the table. Brandon was a civil and pleasant enough to chat with as well. Turned out his accent was Northern Irish, but from an English family, reinforced by going to a public school full of other English kids, although when egged on, he was able to put on a fine Irish brogue.

We managed to act like ordinary people, and over drinks, the conversation flowed easily enough, with stories and laughs and all the sort of stuff that would normally happen around a table with people our age.

Clearly I was not the only one with a few glasses under my belt before getting to the bar, because by the end of the second round that had been procured by Brandon, we were all good and drunk.

It was only when Marie excused herself for the bathroom again that things grew serious again.

"Listen, Daniel," Brandon began, his words slightly slurred, although he worked to keep them straight, "I do like you, and this has been good fun. But we're still nowhere nearer to sorting out or problem from before."

"Yeah. I know."

"Truth be told, I like this girl. Quite a lot. And although you're clearly not bothering her, and made an commendable effort to make things amiable between us all, I still think you should know that I still have quite an interest. That I quite want to pursue."

"Meaning what exactly? Let's skip the Edwardian high speech here for a second. What are you saying? That you have romantic interests and dreams of never-ending love, or that you simply want to tap that?"

The question took Brandon aback.

Over the last hour, I had secretly started to have enjoy seeing him perplexed. There was no way in hell I could step up and compete with his lackadaisical and casual way, so instead I had my fun being more boorish and blunt, having long since stopped caring what came out of my mouth. My brain quite enjoyed being allowed to take a break, letting my mouth get into trouble all on its own without having to point out how dumb what I just might have said was.

"Come on. We're on a ship for two weeks. I assume that although you have old-worldly charm running out of every pore of you where the rest of us have mere sweat, you still know perfectly well that what you're looking at here is a two week fling at best."

Brandon's aloofness was replaced by something else, something with a bit more edge to it. It wasn't exactly anger, as much as maybe irritation. Like a poker player who just realized someone was onto his bluff.

"Crude words and sharp mind on you, aye?"

"Watch it, you're going full Irish on me there."

He laughed. "Screw you, Daniel."

It wasn't harsh words, it felt more like the way you'd tell a friend to fuck off. Kindly go fuck yourself, in the most friendly way possible.

Brandon drank, before speaking up again.

"But yes, you're quite right. I want to, as you said, tap that. And so do you, I guess."

"Would be lying if I said anything else."

"So here we are, still with the same problem."

It was my turn to drink, while I thought.

Clearly we weren't getting anywhere. And although Brandon was one of the good guys, he wasn't that good a guy that I'd be quite willing to walk out on even half a chance with Marie.

Despite having my fun being boorish, fighting over her wasn't a good option either. Especially since I was entirely lacking in fighting skills, despite what the caveman part of my brain would sometimes suggest. Making Marie choose between us was probably the best option, but still an asshole move. First and foremost, it could go either way, so half a chance was exactly what that left me with. Plus, making her choose would also make things awkward.

So I tried to look beyond the simple logic, and tried to tap into that thing from before. Not thinking and caring, and just making the best of things.

And that. That was exactly it.

Stop being logical of things, and make the best of it.

If me and Brandon stood half a chance each, the best option would be to pool our chances into a full one, wouldn't it?

Drunk logic was on its way to check with my brain if this added up, but I stopped it. Less of the thinking, more of the making the best of things.

"So what if we just skip the problem entirely? What do you say about splitting her?"

If I thought I'd seen Brandon taken aback before, then I'd been wrong. The question came swerving out of left field, and knocked his composure clean of his face.

His jaw actually fell open.

"Split... her?"

"As you said, you want to tap that. Well so do I. The way I see it, we can either have one of us walk away with nothing, or... and I must admit this is a bit of a fair shot, we can try working together and see if we can't all win."

Brandon collected his jaw from where it hung at his chest, and drank deeply from his gin tonic, not stopping until nothing but ice cubes and lime wedges were left at his lips.

"You're... you're suggesting what exactly? A threesome?"

I shrugged. "Probably, yeah. Got any other ideas."

Brandon tried drinking again, only to find his glass as empty as before.

He set it down at the table with faint disgust at its treachery.

He opened his mouth to start speaking, twice, but nothing came out.

"Work it over. I'm grabbing us another round."

12