The Cuckold Diet Challenge Ch. 07

I thought about it. I'm ashamed to say, I thought about it long and hard, especially hard. I finished the night down $720, didn't take advantage of the offered 'amenities', and left before the gangbang started. I put my name on the waiting list anyway, since they assured me the wait was pretty long, and I had no idea where things were going to end up between me and Danielle.

When I got home, the kids were in bed, and Danielle gave me another sad look. "You could have left a note," she said.

"Funny, I was going to say the same thing," I told her.

She sighed. "I'm sure I told you I was taking them to Eric's game."

"Not that I recall. I would have been happy to go."

She helped herself to a drink at the bar. I was done with drinking, but grabbed a bottle of Coke. It seemed like she wanted to talk, and I wasn't going to fight it.

"Angela called. She and Tom invited us and the kids over tomorrow. She was quite insistent. I told her we'd go, if you didn't have any issues. She said if you did, you needed to call her."

"No, I don't mind." I saw her staring at the soda I was drinking. "Don't start."

She wouldn't listen of course. "You stink of cigar smoke and booze. You're drinking a Coke? The kids said your weight was up when you weighed-in today. Was everything we went through for nothing? Don't you want to live to see your kids graduate high-school?"

"I don't need this shit from you, Danielle," I snapped. "What are you going to do? Get gangbanged if I gain a pound? Pull a frat-house train because I had a cigar?"

Her face turned red, and I expected a harsh response. She took a sip of her drink, sitting quietly before speaking. "I care about you Rick. I want you to be healthy. That's all."

"You'll have to excuse me if I don't believe you. Your track record on honesty isn't all that great lately."

She finished her drink and stood. "I'm not going to sleep with anybody else, and I'm through with lying. I won't nag you, and I won't put you down. I'm still hoping, beyond reason it seems, that we can work things out. I want to." She turned and walked toward the bedroom. At the door, she turned and spoke. "You're welcome to come back to our bed. I'd like that. No pressure, just an open offer." Then she walked into the room.

Just like her to have to get the last word in. I slept in the guest room, and had second thoughts about passing on Sin and Candy.

~ * ~ * ~

She took the kids to church. I didn't go. She didn't push it. They were late getting back. The kids told me they'd had to wait in the library while their Mom talked to one of the priests. She looked worn out, no surprise, and wasn't in the best of moods when we got ready to visit our friends.

Late lunch at Tom's was simple. Burgers and hot dogs on the grill, chips and an assortment of drinks. I limited myself to one burger and one hot dog, and only a couple of beers. The kids were playing in the basement rec-room, when Tom dragged me off to his study. I imagine Angela was grilling Danielle somewhere.

"So," Tom asked, "are you gonna fill me in on where things stand?"

I shrugged. "We live in the same house. We both get to see the kids. She's finally got a job that actually pays something. Gina's gone, working with the firm, and Jennifer is temporarily on hold, while I try to figure out what I plan to do. I'm tired of all the bullshit, and have stopped playing her game."

"What does that mean, 'stopped playing'? Have you guys settled your differences? Are you getting a divorce?"

"No divorce on my part, not right now. I don't want to risk losing the kids. Other than that, I don't think I can get past what she did. I tried, but it was just too much. I guess it's in limbo. I'm not making the effort now."

"Then what are you doing? Still trying to get in shape before coming back?" He eyed my third beer of the afternoon.

"Not particularly. I'm taking a break. It's not worth busting my ass over. I practically kill myself and for what? To live with a cheating slut? If I want to have a cigar, or a couple of drinks, I think I've earned it. I'm not going to starve myself to lose a few pounds because she didn't enjoy the sex. Fuck that. It's not like we're going to be doing anything in the near future."

"I hope you're not giving it all up. You lost over 40 pounds, man! You're looking better than you have in years. Tell me you're not feeling better."

"I haven't given up totally," I said. "I'm just not going to kill myself anymore. If I lose a pound or two a week, I'll be happy."

"So where are you at now? Closing in on 200 I imagine. You were, what, around 210 a couple of weeks ago?"

"It's been a rough couple of weeks."

"What does that mean? Losing 2-3 pounds a week instead of 5 to 10?"

I felt uncomfortable admitting the truth. "I haven't lost anything since it all went to shit."

Tom looked at me hard. "Shit. You blew it up didn't you? How much have you gained? Three, four, five pounds?"

Like I could hide anything from him. My only consolation was that Danielle was probably getting it worse from Angela. "Six. I gained six pounds, alright?"

He sat back, sighing. "Look, Rick. You have one more month to go before you come back. Get down to 200, buy yourself a nice wardrobe, and come back fit and ready for action. Don't make this a total waste."

"It's not a total waste," I sneered. "I learned my wife is a cheating slut for big cock. That's worth something, right?"

~ * ~ * ~

On the ride back home, Danielle looked exhausted.

"That was fun, huh?" I sighed.

"Right. Just loads of laughs. Angela beat on me practically the whole time I was there. I'm in no hurry to go back," Danielle said.

"Ditto Tom."

We were pretty quiet in the front seat, while the twins argued in the rear. As we pulled up to the house, she asked softly. "You want to talk about anything?"

I shrugged. "Not particularly."

"How about we go out on the porch, and talk about nothing. Nothing about what happened, nothing about working things out."

That seemed an odd way of putting it. "Sure. Nothing works for me."

That's what we did. We got the kids settled in, and talked about nothing consequential. A little about her new job. A smidgen about current events. A hint of people outside the little group that were aware of our issues. A bit of the kids' schedules, and weekly plans. A lot of nothing.

At the end, we danced on the periphery of our issues. "How's Shelly's job search going?" I asked.

"No luck so far. She's reaching out to her network, and working with a recruiter."

"Tina's marriage?"

"They're in the same house. Seeing some marriage counselor. I guess that's progress. They're not talking about divorce yet."

"That's good," I said.

She finished her drink. "How's Gina doing? She's working at your old place, Angela says. You gave her a recommendation?"

"Yeah. I haven't heard much. She's part of the associate pool. She seems to be happy with the work. Haven't talked to her in a while."

"Jennifer? I haven't seen her around."

"I had her take a break. I was ready to crack. I snapped at her when she tried to get me to work out. I might call her back in a few days."

"You should. She was working miracles with you." She stood, stretching. "I have a little paperwork I need to finish before tomorrow morning. Can you take care of getting the terrors to bed?"

"Sure. I think I'll hit the treadmill for a while afterward."

She stood in front of me, hesitantly leaned down and kissed my cheek. "I love you, Rick."

"Me too, Danielle."

She left and I finished my drink. Alright. I wasn't going to kill myself, but I could keep up the running. I'd pretty much promised Jennifer that much. A little bit of self-control around all the bad foods might not hurt. It would at least get Tom off my back.

It took me twenty minutes to get the kids to bed, and I spent an easy hour on the treadmill, before taking a shower, and hitting the sack.

I was a long time getting to sleep. I had no idea what the hell I wanted to do, or how I was going to go about doing it. What a fucking mess.

~ * ~ * ~

Monday I called Jennifer, and told Francine I wanted to reduce the calories again. 1500 this time, not 1200. I setup an afternoon meeting with Dale, the new Managing Partner for later in the week. Weston took my call in the afternoon, to make sure everything was on track. We chatted about nothing, it was nice.

For the first time in close to a month, I felt like I was regaining some control over my life.

Instead of spending three hours doing cardio, and another 90 minutes lifting weights, I hit the treadmill for an hour, to get back in the swing of things.

The following morning, I got up with Danielle, and dealt with the kids while she went off to work. After a morning run, I had my breakfast which Francine had prepared, and organized my finances, making sure everything was still protected, and adding enough to the household accounts to keep it solvent. I didn't know where my relationship was headed yet, but I was determined not to let myself get screwed over. Not now, and never in the future. A couple of calls with Taxman Jerry, and everything was in order, under control.

I picked up the kids after school, and realized that in the very near future, we were going to need a solution for taking care of them after school. With Danielle working full-time, and me going back to work in a little more than 3 weeks, I knew we needed help.

Wednesday, after getting the kids to school, and my morning run, I turned to an unlikely source.

She opened the door, and I saw confusion. "Rick? What are you doing here?"

Standing on her doorstep, I wondered if she'd even invite me in. "Hi, Tina. Do you have a couple of minutes?"

She hesitated, then opened the door for me. "Sure. C'mon in."

I spent a few minutes chatting about how things were going with her, and she assured me things were much better. "Does your husband know it was me with you in the video?" If he did, I'd probably have to abandon my plans.

"No. The counselor suggested he shouldn't know. He knows it was a onetime slip and it won't happen again. Why? Are you worried he's gonna come looking for you? Are you checking up on me?"

"Actually, I came to make you an offer."

A look of suspicion creased her face. "What kind of offer?"

"It's more of a job offer. Danielle's working longer hours, and I will be soon. I was hoping we could work out something, where you take care of the twins after school, until either Danielle or I get off and can pick them up. I'd happily pay for the service."

"You've got a job?"

"Not yet, but I expect I will by the end of the month. I want to prepare for that time. You won't have to feed them dinner, but an after dinner snack would be nice. I don't imagine we'll be later than 6:00 pm, so it would be for about 3 hours a day. If you could get them started on their homework, that would be ideal."

I saw her thinking about it. They weren't in the same social circle as us, but our kids attended the same school. Our connection was solely through the twins. I knew that her husband Michael earned a decent living, but they were often short of cash. "What are we talking about, money wise?"

"I thought $120 a week would do it."

She nodded. "How about $120 a week for watching the kids, and another $30 for the snacks. That's only $3 a day each."

We negotiated $600 a month, paid up front, and if both Danielle and I were stuck, she could drop off the kids at our place by 6:30, and Francine would watch them until we got home.

She got up, and headed toward the kitchen. "Can I get you a drink? Water, diet?"

"Water is fine," I said.

She returned with glasses for both of us. "Have you considered seeing a counselor, Rick? It's really helping us. Maybe it could help you. I understand that you and Danielle are still on the outs."

I sighed. "It's not the same, Tina. Imagine for a second how your husband would have reacted if you'd done what Danielle did, and he saw those videos."

She blanched, taking a sip of her water. "I don't even want to think about it. I wouldn't blame him for dumping me. So what are you going to do?"

"I don't know. I wish I did. For now, I'm just going to try to keep the household intact, for the kid's sake."

"You know she loves you, and she feels terrible about what she did."

"I know she says so, but some of her actions were frankly unforgivable."

"Can I give you a piece of advice. Something my counselor told us?"

I waited patiently. It seems like everybody had advice. I'd like to see how they'd feel if they went through the shit I did.

"Stop thinking about the bad stuff. Don't dwell on that. You guys had a lot of great years together, and you have two beautiful children. Think about those things. Because I believe you could have that again, maybe even better."

"I wish it was that easy. I don't try to think about the bad stuff. It comes on unbidden. Little things remind me of it, all the time. That's part of the problem. I'm hoping that in time the images will fade, I won't be reminded of her perfidy constantly."

I said my goodbye, happy to have gotten one more element of my life under control. I was working on what I could, while still trying to figure out where I was headed in the long term.

On Thursday, I spent much of the day working with Dale, my replacement as Managing Partner. He seemed to have most things under control, and I was able to explain a few issues, and act as a sounding board for some of his ideas. I also spent a couple of hours with Mike, the outgoing senior partner. We put together a schedule for the next few weeks, where we could meet, and I could slowly take over the reins.

It was the first time Mike and I had been able to talk about what had happened. He had a general idea, all second hand, from Tom. I liked the man, and trusted him. I'd known him for almost 15 years, and respected his opinion. It was difficult for me, but I decided to be as open and honest at possible, although I held back most of the details. I explained things from my point of view, and admitted that I was in a holding pattern at home, torn over what to do about my marriage.

His advice was pretty direct. Much like him.

"I'll give you an old man's thoughts, if it doesn't sound too patronizing. Trust is the hardest thing to recover. All you can do is act like you trust her, and give it time. Only time will heal broken trust. If you're not willing to put in a considerable amount of time, giving her the benefit of the doubt, letting the trust rebuild, you're wasting your time."

"From a strictly business view, it would be great if you two could work things out. Outwardly, you appear as the perfect couple, even better, now that you're looking healthier. I can't tell you what to do, but in your shoes, I'd do my best to work things out. That means giving her a chance to regain your trust. You may get hurt again, but you have to ask yourself if getting your marriage back on track is worth it."

He gave me a serious look. "Whatever you do, don't air your dirty laundry in public. If this gets out, you wouldn't be able to hold a managing position here. I hope you understand that."

It was something to think about. As if I didn't have enough already.

When I got home with the kids, Jennifer was waiting for me. She clucked over my lack of progress, and gave me a lot of grief when she took my weight. "Damn, Rick! What the hell! You weigh 214 lbs? You've gained four pounds?"

I grinned. "No, I gained six pounds. I've lost two since last Saturday."

She dragged me to the basement and put me on the treadmill. "We've got our work cut out for us. You gonna give me your all again?"

I nodded. "For the next month. Then I'm going back to work. I'd like to continue having you train me, but my schedule won't be as flexible."

"Mornings or evenings better for you?" she asked.

"Evenings, I'd say. I won't have as much time for the kids, and I'd like to work out with them as well. We'd get to spend time together, and develop good habits in them."

"What about your wife? What's she doing, now that the country club scene is out the window, and she's working longer hours?"

"I don't know. I guess I'll talk to her."

I gave her an hour and a half, before I went upstairs and let Francine feed us. Danielle wasn't home yet which was the new standard. Jennifer gave me my marching orders, another easy hour on the treadmill, late, and she wanted me running in the morning. The taskmaster was back.

Danielle was late, and I was putting the kids to bed when she got home. It was time to see if we could at least be sociable with each other.

I took her bag, and pointed toward the stairs. "Why don't you tuck them in, and I'll heat up your dinner," I told her. She appeared surprised by my offer, but nodded, and slowly climbed the steps.

I sat with her while she ate. She gave me a tired smile. "Thanks," she said.

"Looks like you had a rough day. Everything Ok?"

She nodded, digging in. "Yeah, it's just the workload is huge. I don't have enough time to do everything they want, and it's all on such a tight deadline." She gave a little chuckle. "Look at me, trying to explain that to you."

I gave her what advice I could. They'd keep piling it on until they found her limit. It's what we did. Until she balked or failed, it would keep getting worse. "You need to say no. They'll keep pushing, but you need to be firm. 'No' works."

She looked up at me. "That didn't seem to be in your business vocabulary for the last few years."

"I said no a lot. Unfortunately, when you're at the top, there's nowhere else to pass the buck. Every fire ended up in my lap. For the last 4 years, I worked a full-time job, billing clients, and spent another 4-5 hours a day dealing with all the critical issues. Reassigning resources, prioritizing things, I offloaded what I could, but every hard decision was mine. Every follow-up. Anything goes wrong, in the end it was my problem."

I hoped she was finally beginning to understand some of what I'd been going through. It's part of what made her betrayal so damn difficult to live with. I'd busted my ass for so long, to finally make it to the top, where I could finally ease back a little, and she chose that moment to blindside me.

I saw she had finished eating, and she was watching me. "Are we talking now?" she asked.

She understood nothing.

"Not if you don't want to," I said tiredly, getting up for my last cardio of the day. My legs were worn out, but I wasn't going to give Jenny the satisfaction of chewing me out the next morning.

She stood quickly. "Wait, Rick. I...I didn't mean that like it must have sounded. I want us to talk. Please."

I nodded. "Why don't you relax, and get out of your work clothes. I'll be downstairs on the treadmill for the next hour. I'll be keeping it slow. If you want to come down and chat, I'm willing."

She was still watching, standing by the table, as I headed downstairs to my workout room.

It was a good 10 minutes before she joined me. She'd put on sweats and a t-shirt. Danielle climbed on the elliptical machine beside me, and studied the controls for a few seconds before starting to input her information.

We talked. Still mostly inconsequential stuff, neither of us eager to bring up our recent issues. A little more talk about her work. I knew the firm. They were a little bigger than ours, but not huge. We had a better address. Of course I was familiar with the principals and for a moment wondered if they had any ulterior motives in hiring her. Like maybe having me beholden to them. If so, they were in for a surprise.

Danielle was breathing hard after only 15 minutes or so. I cranked up the speed on the treadmill a bit, trying to work up a sweat. She was laboring, her sentences coming out piecemeal. It was surprising to see how much better shape I was in than her, after only two months.