The Descent of Inanna

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A vampire story set in ancient Sumer.
1.2k words
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Exile alone would never have driven me mad. My entire life, I had felt distant and out of place. Only Sin, with this teasing green eyes and quick smile had ever made me feel loved. I had loved him since we were children. When he chose prison, rather than to be exiled with me, my heart was broken.

It was only by chance that I found the humans and pure coincidence that I, who was so out of favor with my own people, was readily accepted as their goddess. Though I fed on blood, I was more loved than feared, and so, as queen and goddess, I ruled.

I found joy in life little by little. I learned to laugh without Sin. I dreamed my own dreams. Then Sin stepped into my temple and my years alone were instantly forgotten. I was in his arms and my world was whole. But it did not last. Only days later, I found him with one of my own priestesses in his arms. Twice I had been betrayed, but this I could not forgive. I would not. I cast them both out.

I could not close my eyes without seeing them together. I did not sleep, but that I dreamed of him. I saw him once, when he was not there, standing just outside my vision. In a rage, I tore at my eyes with my own nails to be free of these visions. A priest restrained. I could easily have killed him by hand or decree, but I did not. I did not really want to hurt myself. I was in enough pain.

I soon saw that I was with child. I grieved anew that I found no joy in it. I felt the child move within me and knew her to be a girl and I felt nothing. I was alone with my visions. When she was born, I gave her to my priestesses. I needed no more images to cause me pain. "What are we to call her," a priestess asked. I told them 'Ishtar' the Atlantean word for child. I did not look at her.

My skin went dry like ancient paper, my hair fell tangled in my face, and the sounds of the temple slowly turned to silence. The humans let me be. One priest stood watch outside my door. No one came or went. I sat, silent and still, seeing hearing, and feeling nothing. I do not know how many years I passed in this state, but I know how they ended.

I heard a sound. Though I could not place it, it caught my attention and pulled me from the darkness. A dark haired girl ran through the curtained doorway and fell at my feet. My daughter.

Just barely out of childhood, she looked up at me with blue eyes that sparkled like colored glass. She was beautiful and she was mine. For all that I had been a victim, it was nothing to leaving this child motherless.

"Ishtar," I said, wishing I had called her anything else. Her name was proof of my rejection and though she may not have known it, I felt it keenly.

Regret coursed through me. She reached out to brush a tear from my cheek. Her bracelets glittered in the torchlight, among them a string of clay beads I made long ago. They seemed to be from another life; a stranger's life.

"Oh child," I said, "for all the stars in the sky, could you ever forgive me?" she smiled at me, a slow, beautiful smile and I saw that she had strength and grace already that I might never know.

"I will," she said, "if you will forgive me for not coming sooner." She brushed the tangled hair from my face. "They said you looked without seeing and would take no bread or blood to your lips. They said you haven't said a word in years. Mother, were you truly so lost?" Tears filled her eyes.

"Don't cry for me," I said. She started, hearing a sound. I listened. The temple was busy with activity.

"What is happening," I asked.

"Marduk," she said, "he is a man who claims to be a god, and it may be so. He has an army of followers and they are bringing war to the temple. Our priests prepare to fight."

"And our priestesses?"

"They wish to go to Babylon. There are no war gods there."

"How many are loyal," I asked.

"All of them. Maybe a hundred."

"Then most of them will have to stay. You cannot travel in such a large group,. You must go quietly. I will stay and defend my temple."

"Mother, no!" I smoothed her hair.

"Hush, child. I will find you when I can. Be safe. Live." I embraced her once and bid her go. Tears were in her eyes and mine, but she left and I found myself standing for the first time in years.

I left my chamber, climbing the steep steps to the temple proper and emerged into the light of day. The priests and priestesses turned to me. Some stared in disbelief. Others fell to their knees in worship. I stood before them. My body was frail, but my voice was strong.

"Much has been taken from me," I said, "and much I have lost of my own accord, but this false god will have nothing of mine!" They cheered, many of them raising weapons. I was surprised to see how many of my priests were also warriors but I did not question my good fortune.

A young priest knelt before me. "Take my life for strength," he said, "I give it gladly." Blood, fresh blood! I knelt next to him, carressed his cheek and sank my teeth into his throat. He wrapped his arms around me as his strength slipped away, but he did not resist even in dying. I stood, when I had finished, handing his body gently to a waiting priest. My skin felt more like skin than parchment and my vision was crisper. I looked to those around me. If they were frightened, they did not show it. I listened. I could hear the sound of an army in the distance.

Licking the last trace of blood from my lips, I went to the temple gates. My warrior priests followed weapons flashing in the sunlight. Before us, an army marched steadily forward, a large man in battle gear at their front. "Inanna!" He bellowed, "I am god here now!"

"Marduk," I yelled back, "be careful of your words. You will pay for them in blood!" The armies advanced. Marduk yelled again but his words were lost in the sudden clash of weapons. I had not need for words. I had caught a warrior and had done away with his weapon. He would give his life as my sweet priest had, but this time I would not be gentle.

note to the reader: I am submitting this story to my school's literary magazine. There is an option for a cash prize so I really want it to be as good as it can possibly be. So, any comments you have or suggestions for improvement will be greatly appreciated.

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theInsaneArtisttheInsaneArtistalmost 12 years ago

"They wish to go to Babylon. There are no war gods there."

Oh how wrong you are, priestess. They had, at the very least, nine different gods/goddesses of war in Babylon. You lot will be sorely dissapointed.

Of course, one of them is named Ishtar, so that may have been what you were hinting at...

Good story, the magazine should love it! :)

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
Feedback

I would have liked to see a bit more background information; however, I look forward to the next section.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
Good start

You have a great beginning here, but I think you could have chosen a better place to end. Perhaps after the battle, unless you are planning an immediate second story. It leaves the reader feeling left in the middle of the story...or so it seems. Other than that it was a good start..keep up the good work, and good luck.

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