The Fat Chicks Ch. 00: Intro

"It's uh...it's just me. I...I didn't put on any cologne." She said quietly, blushing lightly.

"Ten more minutes on dinner." Patty said as she came out of the kitchen. "I opened the wine, it needs to breathe before we pour it."

She looked back and forth between them and grinned.

"So which one of you bogarts has the joint?" She asked as she sat on the coffee table.

Lucy held it out to her, and Patty picked up a lighter and lit it again before she took a long hit off of it. She held it out to Randy, and he passed it to Lucy.

"You're not hitting it?" Patty asked.

"Secondhand." He grinned, then turned to face Lucy.

She took a long hit, then leaned toward him. He leaned closed, putting his hand on her leg. Lucy stiffened, and he smiled at her. She nodded and blew a stream of smoke toward him, watching as he inhaled it.

"That looks like fun, I'm going to have to try it next time I have an overnighter." Patty laughed, holding her hand out for the joint.

She took another quick hit, then handed it back to Lucy. Getting to her feet, she went back into the kitchen.

"I'm really sorry about you seeing me...you know...but after we uh...got stuck..." He said quietly.

"So you couldn't wait to bust a nut after dry humping her in the breezeway? Is that what you're trying to say?" Patty laughed from behind the breakfast bar. "Oh, I might as well tell you, there's no point in trying to whisper around me, I've got ears like a vulcan."

"She does." Lucy said, then turned and smiled shyly at him. "But it's okay, I uh...I kind of liked it too."

* * * * *

"So do you have a girlfriend, Randy?" Patty asked, grinning over at Lucy. "No one you're dating, or thinking about dating?"

"Patty..."

"No, I've only met one girl that seems interesting, but I'm not in any big hurry." He said, glancing at Lucy, then back at Patty. "I just got moved in a few weeks ago, and started a new job at the same time, so money is kind of tight..."

"So where did you meet this special someone, if you don't mind me asking?" Patty asked.

"I ran into her in the hallway at my apartment building of all places." Randy said, grinning at her. "I actually knocked her down, and when I helped her up, we kind of got stuck together, which was alot of fun if you want the truth. If her nosy roommate hadn't stuck her head out of their apartment door, we might still be there."

"Well thank god for her roommate." Patty laughed. She picked up the bottle of wine and poured herself a glass, then picked his up and filled it for him. She smiled as she raised the bottle toward Lucy. "You ready Lucy?"

"I'm fine." Lucy said softly, sneaking a look at Randy.

"So tell us more about this girl, Randy." Patty said. She was having fun making Lucy uncomfortable, but she was delighted with how Randy was playing along with her.

"She's a little taller than I am, but that's not a problem as long as she doesn't wear crazy high heels." He laughed. "She's really pretty, with short brown hair and green eyes. But she has this natural earthy scent that drives me nuts. I'm going to ask her not to wear perfume if I ever get up the nerve to ask her out."

"So, you uh...didn't mind being stuck with her like that..." Lucy asked quietly. "It must have been embarras..."

"Oh, it was embarrassing, but it was fun too." He said, turning to look at her. "It felt really good having her pressed against me like that, neither of us able to pull away. I have to admit, I got a little excited being that close to her, and I really hoped she wouldn't notice, and think I was a creep or something."

"I di...I doubt if she thinks you're a creep. I bet she took it as a compliment." Lucy said, smiling at him. "I know I would. But why do you need to get up the nerve to ask her out?"

"Because a girl this hot probably has guys hitting on her all the time." He laughed. "I don't have a lot of money, so taking her somewhere nice..."

"She might prefer spending a quiet evening at home, watching TV and getting to know you rather than having you put on some front to impress her." Lucy laughed, nudging him with her elbow. "She might even get her roommate to go to a movie or something so she could be alone with you."

"I doubt if the roommate would go for that." Patty pitched in. "It would probably be alot more fun for her to hang around and watch her friend squirm..."

"Well, if her roommate won't go out, you could ask her over to your place, since you live so close."

"Oh yeah." Randy laughed, leaning back on the couch. "We could kick back on my futon and split a six pack while we watch a movie on my laptop."

"You got any porn on that laptop?" Patty asked, leaning toward them and handing Lucy a joint.

"Never mind her." Lucy laughed. She paused and took a hit off the joint, then put her hand on his cheek and turned his face toward her. Exhaling slowly, she blew a stream of smoke at him, then handed the joint back to Patty.

"But that sounds like a nice evening." She said, smiling at him. "If she likes you, and I'm pretty sure she does, she'd be happy just to spend time with you. You never know, she might like you so much, you might get lucky on the second date."

"Second date? Are you kidding me?" Patty laughed. "Does Randy look like the kind of guy that's gonna want to date a little tramp that puts out on the second date? He looks like a third, maybe even a fourth date kind of guy if you ask me."

"Nobody asked you, Patty." Lucy said, glaring at her. "If a girl likes a guy enough, getting intimate with him..."

"Is getting intimate just making out, or going all the way." Patty asked, taking a sip of her wine. "I'm sure Randy would like to know too."

"Making out, hand under the shirt and bra, but on the outside of the pants." Randy sighed. He closed his eyes, a small smile on his face. "There has to be lots of sloppy wet kisses, maybe a few hickeys. That way, you both have something to fantasize about later. And if you don't like the way someone kisses, you're not gonna like it when you go all the way with them. Making out is a test drive, and it's a step I never skip."

"Bonus points for Randy." Patty muttered. "I wish more of the guys I dated thought that way."

"So how many test drives do you usually take, Randy? Just out of curiosity." Lucy asked him, trying not to smile.

"That depends on how good a kisser she is." Randy smiled, not looking at either of them. "I like to start off slow, and let a little tension build. It's a total turnoff if she sticks her tongue down my throat right off the bat."

"How she responds to my touches is important too." He said, looking at Lucy. "I like a girl to me tell if what I'm doing feels good, or move my hand to where she wants me to touch her. She doesn't have to be real obvious about it, but a little feedback goes a long way."

"That's good to know, Randy. I'm going to have to remember that." Lucy said quietly.

"Me too. I guess we just expect guys to know what we like, I mean, all the parts are in movies and magazines..." Patty said. "All you have to do is watch a little porn, and bamm, you're a pro."

"Porno fucking is fake, but making out, or making love with someone, that's sharing an experience with them." He said softly. "You have to give them a little part of yourself, or else it doesn't mean anything. You don't have to be in love to make love, but you do have to share yourself with your partner..."

"Okay, stand up and drop your pants, I want to make sure you're a guy." Patty said, grinning broadly. "And if you keep talking like this, I'm going to throw you out and have you knock again so we can let you back in. We'll call that our third date."

"I couldn't do that, Patty. As pretty as you are, what would that say about..."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're a gentleman, a real knight in shining armor." She laughed, looking over at Lucy. "But let's say Lucy was the woman you're talking about. We all know you find her attractive. If she came over to your apartment later and told you that her visiting was your third date, would you tell her no, if she offered to go all the way with you?"

"Yeah, because sex gets better the better you know someone." He said, smiling at Lucy. "I'd make out with her, feel her up...this is the third date? That means shirt and bra off, hand under the pants, so I'm pretty sure she'd go home with a smile on her face."

"You gotta give me a list of what happens when." Lucy laughed. "You're getting stuff on the second and third date that I don't do till...well, just later."

"I'm alot easier than she is." Patty laughed. "You'd have your hand in my pants on the second date. If you didn't do it, I would. My hand would sure as hell be in yours."

"There's nothing written down." Randy told Lucy, trying not to laugh. "If I start to do something that you don't like, you tell me, and I stop. But if you want something I'm not doing...you can let me know, and we could see where it goes."

"And this is how you're going to treat this girl you met?" Lucy asked. "If it is, I'm jealous."

"I'm not jealous, but his way does sound like a nice change of pace." Patty said softly, almost as if she were speaking to herself.

"I think I'm going to call her." Randy said as he got to his feet. He stretched, then reached in his pocket and pulled out his phone. He held it out to Lucy, smiling down at her. "Could I get your number? I liked talking to you, and you might be able to help me figure out what she likes. That's alot to ask I know, but..."

"No, I'd be happy to." Lucy laughed as she punched her number into his phone. She hit dial, and waited for her voicemail to pickup, then hung up and handed it back to him. "Just add the last number dialed as a contact when you get home. Do you mind if I add you to my contact list?"

"No, you might need to get a hold of me sometime, but it's getting late, and I have to be up early." Randy grinned at her, then turned and looked at Patty. "Patty, I had a really nice time, and I'm looking forward to talking to you again. Anytime you get bored..."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah...like having your cute little ass hanging around and not being able to do anything with it is a thrill." She laughed. "No, you go chase this little chippie you met, and see if you can make her happy. You make her sound like she deserves it."

"Come on, I'll walk you to the door." Lucy laughed, getting to her feet. Slipping her arm through his, she smiled up at him as they started for the door.

* * * * *

There you have it. Chapter 1 and others will follow as I write them.

I want Lucy and Randy to hit it off, make out, fuck, have fun together, fall in love, and live happily ever after...

Now I just need to figure out how to make that happen.