The First Six Months

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White wife finds more than love in a black man.
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While some specific places and names have been changed, the events in this story are all true. This is my story, and the story of my love, my heart, my Lord and Master, my true husband. While it may seem from the text to be a tale of lust, it is not. This is the story of our love.

*

I knew he was coming; he should be at my room any minute. I couldn't wait; it seemed like it had been so long since I had seen him last. Even though we talked and e-mailed constantly, it wasn't enough. I heard him walk up to my room and he opened the door. I got up off the bed, so happy to see him; but I also knew I had to wait for him to tell me I could go to him. I was at the same time so scared and so excited I was shaking, I was already wet. I wasn't sure I could stand, I felt so weak. He didn't look at me, he didn't greet me; he just came in and walked around; inspecting to make sure everything met with his approval. I stood behind him, not knowing what else to do, waiting for him to acknowledge me. Finally he did. He circled around behind me, so close I could feel his hard-on, but still not touching me. I could feel his breath on my neck as started to talk.

"There are three rules," he said in a low voice, soft and almost a growl, so sexy I could feel myself getting wetter. "First, you will only speak to me on your knees, and you will address me as Sir any time you talk to me." I nodded. I could feel him behind me; I could feel him moving around to my other side. "Second, you will not fight me, you will let me control your body and you will not resist me, you will do anything and everything I tell you to. Do you understand?" I nodded again, my eyes closed as I tried to conquer the desire that was threatening to overcome me. There was a long pause; I tried to lean back into him, but he kept himself just beyond physical contact. I wanted to ask him what the third rule was, but I knew he would tell me in his own time. After what seemed like forever, he said, "third rule. You will not cum unless you ask, and I give you permission. If you are going to cum and I tell you no, you will beg me to stop. Do you understand the rules?" I nodded again.

With that he stepped back and sat down on the bed. I shivered with the ache from the loss of contact, slight as it was. He snapped his fingers and pointed to the floor. "Down." I immediately dropped to my knees in front of him. I reached for his hips and instantly he said, "don't touch me." I felt like I was going to die, I wanted to feel his body beneath my hands so badly. So when he pushed his shorts down and let me take his cock into my mouth it was wonderful. But he didn't let me enjoy it for long before he pulled me back up and bent me across his knees.

How the hell did I get to this position? I asked for it. Well, sort of. Ok, so I'm not really sure how the whole thing started; I mean, I know the events that occurred, but damn it was not what I was looking for, and definitely not what I expected. Master Brenin really wasn't my type at all. I couldn't even begin to tell you if he was good-looking or not, because he was black. And I was raised in a very white, very prejudiced, household. He had invited me to his room one night. Sure, I knew exactly what he had in mind, but I thought it was harmless enough and I figured I would spend some time, politely turn him down, and leave. Besides, I had talked him into giving me a shoulder rub, so I thought I would benefit. Well, I did benefit, but not the way I expected. When I got to his room and he started massaging my shoulders, his hands felt wonderful; and not just because the massage was relieving my tension. And when he slipped his hands under my shirt and pushed my bra strap down, I knew it was probably a good time to reestablish platonic boundaries; but I didn't. And when I felt his breath, his lips on the back of my neck, I knew I should stop him; but I couldn't. And when he pulled my shirt off and took off my bra I knew there was no going back; but he even stopped, looked at me, and asked me if I was sure, if I was ok with it. And I should have said no, I should have thought about my husband, I should have thought about the fact that I was going to have to look at him across the room the next day in the morning meeting, but I just didn't care about anything except the fact that he was making me feel good. And he made me feel good for the next three hours, and then the next night, which turned into the next week. When it came time for him to leave, I tried to tell myself it was because I was going to miss the great sex. But he wouldn't let me off that easily; he talked to me every day, in the chat room at work, e-mailing me constantly, never leaving me alone until I finally had to admit to him and to myself: I was in love. I had tried to fight it, I had to fight myself, my mind, my upbringing. I had fucked a black man for the first time in my life and I had loved it; but not only that, I fell in love with the first black man I had ever allowed to fuck me.

Held flat across his lap, I could feel how hard he was as he pushed my shirt up and gave me the first slap on my ass. I knew it was coming, I had known for weeks he was going to punish me the first time he saw me again. You see, I had stopped calling him for a few days. I had a damn good reason for it, but I had not gotten permission. And I had voluntarily accepted him as my Master. Even the fear of anticipating the pain was better than the awful silence he had put me through when he had been so angry he refused to talk to me, to write me, to contact me in any way. I felt him lift his hand for the second slap and my whole body tensed, even though I tried to stop it. Then he pushed my panties off so he could spank my bare ass. He didn't spank me fast, or overly hard. He alternated between caressing my ass, my legs, my back and the slaps. Sometimes I would feel him lift his hand from caressing me and I would flinch in anticipation of the next smack that didn't come; because he would merely lift his hand, pause, then gently caress me again. And I started realizing that not only was the pain not so bad, I was actually getting turned on. I had been very worried about how I would be able to accept being spanked, even though it was my decision and my desire, because of the men who had beaten me in the past. The very fact that I was even considering it, let alone being turned on by it with my history was disturbing to me. But I was getting turned on. So much that I started rubbing against him, arching my back and raising up to meet the slaps as they came. So much that I could feel my juices dripping out of my hot pussy. I have no idea how long or how many times he spanked me before he pushed me off of his lap. I fell to my knees in front of him as he looked down at the wet spot I had left on his shorts.

"Lick it," he told me, showing me his shorts. I hesitated, I hate the taste of my own juices as much as I love the taste of a man's cum. "Lick it!" This was not a request. I bent my head and licked his shorts clean.

He picked up my panties, feeling them. Then he pressed them into my hand. "Do you feel how wet they are?" I nodded. "Open your mouth." I looked at him, and involuntarily my teeth clenched, knowing what was coming. "Open. Your. Mouth." He was getting angry at my hesitation, at my resistance to his demands. I opened my mouth, and he stuffed my soaked panties into my mouth as a gag. He pushed me back onto the bed and spanked me again. "I want to use my belt," he said. I nodded, even though I knew he was not asking my permission, he was simply letting me know. My body, just getting used to the sting of his hand, tensed again at the though of the belt. The first slap surprised me even more; I actually liked it better than his hand. He continued to spank me, making me hotter and wetter.

Then he pulled me over, with my legs over the side. Reminding me that I was not to cum without his permission, he told me if I felt I was going to cum I would raise one of my hands. And then he bent over me and I closed my eyes as I realized he was about to put his mouth on my aching pussy. Almost as soon as I felt the first touch of his tongue on my clit I thought I would cum. Even though he's a lot rougher than I like when he goes down on me, he's still so incredibly good at it just thinking about it is nearly enough to make me cum. He started to lick the wetness that had formed from the spanking and I had to stop him, I raised my arm. He lifted his head and looked at me, almost smiling, and waited until I had relaxed a little before he put his head back between my legs and started again. Again and again he brought me to nearly cumming, licking me, shoving first one, then two, then more fingers inside me. Slow and then fast, and soft and then hard, licking me and fucking me with his hand. Again and again I had to stop him, raising my hands to let him know that I was on the verge of cumming. I would raise my hand and he would stop, leaving his fingers inside me but raising his head to look at me. "You're cumming, aren't you?" he would ask; and I would shake my head vigorously to convince him that I was not. Did he know if he had so much as twitched his fingers still inside me that I would not have been able to stop myself? Probably. He knows my body better than I do. The heat, the ache, the need to cum was building almost to physical painfulness; but it was the sweetest pain I could ever remember feeling. I loved every second of it; I wanted it to end for the release I so desperately needed, but at the same time I wanted it to go on forever.

Of course, it wouldn't. Roughly he pulled me off the bed, at the same time turning me over and pushing me forward, so my feet were on the floor as my body was bent over the bed exposing my ass. I knew he was going to spank me again. And he did. He used his belt, I could feel even the difference between the sting of the smooth shiny vinyl surface and the scratch of the hard edges with every strike. I could feel my ass getting redder. He was very thorough and made sure that he spread the blows across my entire ass, ensuring a balance: first the left side, then the right side, higher, lower. He was careful to confine the blows only to my ass; careful not to go too high on my back or too low down my legs. While it stung, it wasn't unbearable. Each strike pushed me forward on the bed as I grabbed handfuls of blankets and clenched my teeth in an attempt to not make a sound. I'm naturally a vocal person, but discretion dictated that I be quiet; after all, what we were doing was not exactly appropriate on so many levels. I could feel my ass cheeks starting to burn as he continued. I couldn't see his face, I didn't know what he was thinking or feeling. I only hope he was as turned on as I was. I'm nearly sure he was, he seems to get turned on simply by being on the same planet with me. Not that I'm complaining about that, never in a million years!

Again he stopped, and told me not to move as I started to push myself up on my arms. I lay there waiting for what was to come next. I heard the sound of my refrigerator door being opened, saw the tell-tale glow of the interior light. What in the hell is he doing? I thought. Maybe he's thirsty. But then I felt something cold against my stinging ass, what took me seemingly forever to figure out was a soda can that he was rolling over the areas he had just abused with his belt. It took me forever, because the sensation of cold can rolling across my burning ass was incredible. Involuntarily I squirmed, trying to press back against the can. He rolled the can across both my cheeks, and then down, just for a second, across my pussy and my clit, then back up to my cheeks. After a few minutes of way too incredibly short of a time, he stopped and I heard him pick up the belt again. And he repeated the process until he was satisfied.

"Get on the bed," he said.

I climbed onto the bed as he pushed me onto my back again. "I'm going to fuck you," he said. I couldn't wait to feel his cock inside my dripping cunt, filling me up, reaching all the way inside me. I should have known it was way too early in the night for there not to be a catch.

"Do not cum," were the words he said as he roughly thrust himself inside me. Oh christ, how was I supposed to do that? But he was not going to trust me to not cum quite completely on my own. He fucked me; hard, fast, not how I like it, but still it felt so good. I wrapped my arms around him, trying to pull him closer to me. But after what seems like only seconds he pulled out of me again. I couldn't help the moan of frustration, pleading with my eyes for him not to leave, trying to hold on to him and pull him back to me. But at the same time I knew better than to resist him too much, just enough for him to see and enjoy my frustration.

He shoved his fingers inside me again. Hard this time, not intending pleasure, yet knowing it was going to give me pleasure. One, two, three, four fingers; he was fisting me roughly. I could feel his hand meeting the resistance from my pelvic bones, knowing that I was going to be sore and bruised in the morning. As he worked his hand inside me, he would wiggle his fingers, just a little bit. And as he did so I tried to think of something else besides what was happening to my body, because if I didn't I was going to cum. It wasn't working though, not really. It had been so long since I had seen him, been with him, felt him all over my body. And added to that now were the new and previously undiscovered pleasures that the spanking brought me. I wanted to tell him, just let me cum once and I won't have to stop you for a while. Just let me cum once and get a release, then I'll be good, I'll resist, I promise.

Finally I couldn't take it any more. "Please," I breathed, somewhere between a whine and a prayer.

"Please, what?" he asked.

"Please let me cum, Master. Oh please, oh please let me cum."

He leaned back a little, not stopping his assault on my pussy. "Why do you want to cum?" he asked.

"I n-n-ne-need to cum. Oh please, " I whimpered.

"Do you deserve to cum?" he responded harshly.

I shook my head, slowly, with a sinking feeling warring with my growing desire. "No," I said quietly. He simply looked at me, watching my face carefully as he was still fisting me hard. I couldn't help myself, I started begging, pleading, half the time nearly incoherently. "Oh, please Master, please let me cum. Oh please, I need to cum. Oh please, oh please, oh please."

"No," was all he said; coldly, detached, almost impersonal. "You may not cum."

I made some kind of noise somewhere between a cat yowling and a baby crying, but quietly as I could; mindful of both the neighbors and unwilling to incur his wrath for protesting. I felt my body arching up to meet his hand. I took a deep breath, trying to will myself into cooperation with my orders. Trying to relax, to convince myself that I wasn't really just a hair away from cumming.

"You are cumming, aren't you?" he accused. I shook my head vehemently. "You are," he said as he slowed his movements with his hands. I shook my head, even as his hand pressed upward and felt for the telltale contractions. "Oh my god, you're cumming," he said. I shook my head even harder, this time willing every fiber of my being to stop. "No, Sir, I'm not cumming."

He yanked his hand out of my cunt and pressed it against my lips. "Lick them clean," he ordered. I closed my eyes, preparing myself for the hated taste, then opened my mouth and sucked his fingers clean of my pussy juices. He backed away from me again, watching my face as he leaned over me. My whole body was quivering, not knowing what was going to come next. I wasn't prepared for what did. With his fingers, he slapped my already overly sensitive clit. I winced as my eyes opened wide in shock. I tried to twist away as I felt him flick my clit again. The pain was incredibly intense for such a relatively harmless tap. There was nothing good about it, no pleasure associated with it. But I felt my need to cum dim in its wake. He kept on, slapping and flicking my clit. I knew he wasn't really doing it that hard, but it hurt so badly. And there was nothing I could do about it. Even though I twisted beneath him, I knew he wasn't going to miss. And I knew that he wasn't going to let me go anywhere; I might as well have been bound to the bed. Despite myself, I heard my whimpers.

"You like that, don't you?" he said. I could hear the smirk in his voice. I squeezed my eyes shut, and took a deep breath, trying to control myself. No, I shook my head frantically. He flicked me again.

"No, it hurts," I said. I don't know if I said anything else or not. I know in my head all I could think was NO, stop; but of course it didn't stop him, and I knew I couldn't say it. He continued until he was satisfied. When he finally told me to turn over, I was unbelievably relieved. But at least I was no longer teetering on the brink of cumming.

Of course, later he did let me cum . . . and cum . . . and cum again. But that first night was nothing compared to the night that followed. Master Brenin loves challenges; I had once told him that he was not the best fuck I'd ever had, and that my best made me cum 13 times. Naturally, Master took that as a challenge he was going to win. And the next night, he did. After three straight hours of fucking in every way I thought I could ever imagine (and some that I had never even thought of), and 17 orgasms later, I was begging him to stop. I had never been fucked like that before, never again would I think Master was anything less than the best.

Now you may be asking how I went from falling in love to being a slave. Or servant. Or submissive. Or whatever you want to call it. Well, first perhaps I should start with how the relationship developed. It was entirely a forbidden relationship. He was barely with me for a week, or I guess I should say I was with him. I kept telling myself that I wasn't going back, yet every night for that week or so in July, up until the day he left, I kept going back. I would sit across the room and watch him in the morning meetings, look at his long legs stretched out underneath the table, watch him lean back in his chair to stretch and see the outline of his chest and stomach underneath the loose fabric of his uniform and remember the previous night running my hands over him. Catching him looking at me, or discovering he'd caught me looking at him, and exchanging crazy smiles across the room. And finding reasons throughout the day to have to go out on the main floor where he worked so that I could see him, or feel him watching me. Looking for reasons why I had to talk to him. Finding it harder and harder to concentrate as each day passed, but convincing myself it was just the sexual attraction pulling me to him. I even argued with him a day or two before he left, when he tried to tell me I was falling in love with him. It was absolutely crazy; it made no sense to me whatsoever. But the day he came to tell me he was leaving, I felt like the bottom had fallen out of my world; I had to fight myself not to cry. And even after he left, the weeks stretched by marked by e-mails, daily conversations where we learned more and more about each other. Chat room conversations when he told me how much he loved me, missed me, and wanted to be with me forever. And I looked back on my life, at all the times I had so badly wanted to believe men who told me they loved me, and realized he was different. His attention never strayed. Even through my temper tantrums, my mood swings, my manic-depressive rollercoaster of emotions, he was always there for me. And I could not help myself but to be there for him, listening to his pain at the marriage he was struggling to keep from falling apart, trying to give him objective advice about his wife even though I wanted him to leave her so much; but not being able to ask for that because I wasn't willing to leave my own husband and children even once I realized I never wanted to live without him.