The Keeping of Lena Ch. 03.5

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A handsome doctor indulges a frustrated widow.
6.6k words
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Part 5 of the 6 part series

Updated 06/16/2023
Created 05/29/2015
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For his entire life, he'd been known as "peculiar."

A painfully sickly child, his father had found him peculiar for his fondness for biology books, and apparent disdain for business. The only activity they'd shared as father as son had been the occasional hunting trip.

But the peculiar boy had found most enjoyment not in his kills, but in their subsequent dissection.

His father had tried his best to steer his odd son in the direction of family business. He'd tried to teach him the secrets of banking and industry, and the value of competitive enterprise.

But by age seven, the peculiar boy had instead used his father's lessons to produce his first taxidermy exhibition.

To his father's minor relief, all tickets were sold, and the show at least closed profitable.

His mother had found him peculiar for the kinds of books he'd asked her to read him before bed each night. Instead of tales of adventure and fantasy, or mysterious folklore, her strange little boy's favorite book had beenThe Origin of Species.

She'd also found him peculiar for his enjoyment of their gardens, in particular, gathering flowers.

But by age eight, after studying volumes of chemistry literature, he'd created his first selection of perfumes for her birthday, using only her favorite blossoms.

He'd been relentlessly tormented by children in his town for his slight form and bookish disposition. His only friend had been a boy even more peculiar than he — the withdrawn, quiet, and violent Renz Wolfenbarger.

And together they grew in their peculiarity, a bond stronger than that of true brothers.

But it wasn't until Karl matured that he began to learn of the terrible darkness upon his friend.

There were rumors of Renz's father Johann, disturbing,sickening rumors, but Renz would never confirm nor deny those horrors. Even still, Karl could see the evidence of the mysterious hauntings of Schloss Wolfenbarger in the way his closest friend behaved around others.

If anyone crossed him, Renz would attack, to violent extremes. What started as harmless boyhood rumbles eventually worsened to drunken, bloody pub brawls as they grew older. Many a victim of Renz had even ended up in hospital, one of the reasons why Karl had grown interested in medicine.

If his dearest friend would harm, then Karl would learn to heal.

He'd watched Renz live his life as if in competition against all others. His friend was fighting against the world, every moment, of every day.

But Karl had known since they were children that Renz was more than a brute. Renz had protected Karl from the cruelties of their peers, defending him when he'd been too small and frail to defend himself.

Karl's father had abandoned the family in disgust upon learning his mother's true heritage, the year that Karl turned seventeen. It was a heritage she'd passed on to her peculiar son, a heritage Karl carried proudly, if in secret.

But it was a heritage his father had deemed unforgivably reprehensible.

Instead of exposing the remaining Günther family to public scrutiny, Renz had protected them from ruin, and had kept their precious secret. He'd paid their debts from his own inheritance, and had even sponsored Karl's schooling all the way through medical university.

Karl had tried, repeatedly, to reject the generosity, for it was more than he would ever be able to repay as a doctor.

But Renz would hear nothing of it.

"We'refamily," Renz had said. "There's no need to ever speak of this again."

When Karl's mother lay ill, it was Renz who had granted her dying wish. He'd found a rabbi to pray with her, in safe secrecy, giving her one last opportunity to express her faith before her death, protecting her from the harsh scrutiny of their town.

Karl had long resolved to defend his peculiar friend, hisbrother, until his last breath, for no one knew his kindness the way that he did. He'd stood by Renz after the death of Johann, after his affairs with married women, his dalliances with concubines and prostitutes, his scandalous divorce, and throughout the fearsome expansions of the ever-growing Wolfenbarger empire.

It had made him ill, for it went strictly against his conscience, but he'd even stood by his dear friend when the rapacious bastard had taken an eighteen-year-old maid from a château in France, turning her into some kind of pampered sexual slave.

But now, Karl was finding it harder than ever to stand by his friend, especially now in his abrupt absence.

Renz had left behind his household staff, an army of workers relentlessly dedicated to serving his every whim and desire. Their unyielding loyalty to their master, theirprince, truly astounded him.

But apparently to Renz, servants were meaningless.

Renz had left behind his niece Odette Alexandra, a precious little girl who'd just lost her father, her baby brother, and very nearly, her mother. If there was ever a time little Dot needed family, it was now.

But clearly, Renz had been too selfish to care.

Renz had even left behind the young, fair maid Lena, who blindly loved him more than sense or reason could explain. Karl suspected Renz's infatuation with the innocent maid had brought more harm upon her fragile body than even she had realized.

But the sweet, pure girl loved Renz all the same, and her extraordinary resilience seemed to fortify her from his abuses.

It was indeed a twisted coupling, but there was no denying that somehow, Renz and Lena...worked. He couldn't deduce quite how, what elements between them had balanced, but Lena seemed to draw out both the worstand the best from Renz, just as Renz seemed to bring about a certain strength in her.

But Renz had walked away from Lena.

Again.

And most unforgivably, Renz had abandoned the closest thing he had to a true sister, the widowed Ava Wolfenbarger. She was grieving in a way that only Renz could truly understand, for he too had lost a child. Renz could comfort Ava like no other.

But he wouldn't even try.

Yes, Renz had been Karl's dearest friend for nearly his entire life. But even as a doctor, he was running out of excuses to rationalize Renz's self-destructive behavior.

Perhaps his dear friend could not be saved, neither by logic, science, nor love.

Perhaps his dear friend was destined to become just as monstrous as his father.

"Karl?"

Karl snapped his head up from the book he'd been struggling for the last hour to read, and was surprised to find Ava standing in the doorway.

This was the first word she'd uttered in a week.

He couldn't yet be certain, but it seemed as if Ava, beautiful Ava, was...back.

"You're out of bed...how are you feeling? Are you in pain?" Karl asked frantically, instantly reminding himself of his latest recordings of her condition. It was a few hours still before her next scheduled dose of morphine. While he didn't want her to suffer in pain, he wanted to ensure she didn'talso suffer with dependency.

Ava smiled weakly and closed the door behind her, before quietly sitting next to him on the settee.

She was so fragile in how she moved, her narrow shoulders shivering despite the silk and fur blanket wrapped around her body.

But even in her physical weakness, Ava was dignified.

She had a natural grace to shame any Queen.

"The pain is not too intense at present. I can manage," Ava replied, her soft voice straining.

Karl reached for his medical bag, but was stopped by a delicate hand on his forearm.

"I can give you something to help it, Ava," Karl explained. Ava softly shook her head.

"I want to feel it. At least for a little while. I've been in this...fog, for...good heavens how long has it been?"

"Seven days, Ava," Karl answered quietly. Ava's eyes faintly moistened, but then she quickly blinked away her tears.

"I need some time awake, Karl dear," Ava said eventually.

Her skin was ashen, even under the warm glow of the fireplace. Even the pale gold in her hair seemed to have faded to pure white.

But her eyes remained as blue as a spring sky.

Even in her weakness, after everything she'd experienced, Ava was still the most stunning creature he'd ever seen.

"You heal when you're ready, Ava. You'll take all the time you need," Karl encouraged. Ava smiled, painfully.

"Dear Karl...I'm a mother. I cannot grieve when I have a child who needs me. I fear I've failed Odette—"

"Nonsense. You have not failed anyone, Ava. Odette Alexandra has been well cared for, I assure you. Lena has been spending each day with her. In fact, she took her out to play in the snow today. She was so exhausted, she went right to sleep after Lena gave her her bath," Karl explained. This seemed to settle Ava, slightly.

"Lena really is quite the special girl, isn't she?" Karl smiled.

"I do believe it is my great fortune in life to be surrounded by very special women," he replied.

A faint flush of pink colored her cheeks, and Ava smiled the first true smile he'd seen from her since before the stillbirth.

She was radiant.

Realizing he was staring, nearly gawking, Karl cleared his throat and struggled to lower his eyes.

But that proved to be a feat even more difficult to accomplish.

Ava was impossiblenot to look at.

"Why Karl, dear...is that blush you're trying to hide?" Ava teased. Karl laughed. Even though he felt mildly embarrassed, he was willing to make fun of himself, if it would bring some kind of joy to Ava.

"I may be a doctor, but I'm also a man...and I suspect the gaze of a man is not what you need right now," Karl replied. Ava brought her hand to Karl's chin, leveling his face with hers.

"I'd quite enjoy the gaze of a man right now, actually...if that gaze is indeedyours," Ava said. He was glad small fragments of her playful, witty demeanor beginning to return.

Her body had healed miraculously, but he could still see just how much emotional pain she was in.

Karl carefully reached for her cheek, gently pushing away the long strands of hair that had fallen loose from her coiffure. Color began to return to her face as he continued to admire her, and with the faintest touch, he brought his thumb to her pouting lips.

"To look at you again is a gift, Ava. A gift I shall treasure forever," Karl said seriously. Ava frowned.

"Is this some kind ofauf wiedersehen?" Ava asked. Karl shook his head.

"Of course not. I'll be here to care for you as long as you need me," Karl replied. He knew he'd need to return to town within a few days, even if for a brief visit, but he fully trusted Gottfried and the rest of his staff of doctors and nurses to manage the hospital in his absence.

"And if that need is...indefinite?" Ava asked immediately. Karl's eyes widened in concern. Had he somehow missed additional symptoms? Just how long did Ava think her recovery would be?

"Ava...forgive me, I should have told you sooner...but...your infection has been clear for days, and your organs suggest ideal function. So if your wish is to have more children, I see no evidence why you'd be unable to, in due time. Despite what you've experienced...you are of great health," Karl offered quickly.

The room seemed to grow hotter when Ava's pretty mouth widened into a bright smile, followed by a new, bright tremble in her shoulders, and finally...a giggle.

She was actually...laughing at him.

This wasn't a reaction he'd been anticipating. Unusual affect was certainly common for women who'd experienced stillbirths, from hallucinations and screaming to abject catatonia, but never before had a patient of his succumbed to such a fit as laughter.

"You peculiar man. Clearly you've spent one to many an hour with your nose in a book. I'm not talking about you caring for myhealth, Karl dear," Ava corrected, once her laughing began to subside. Karl frowned, still confused.

"What other care can I offer?" he asked. His education, his experience with medicine, was truly his most valuable asset. He only wanted to give Ava the best.

"I want you to care for me as a man, Karl. Just as I want to care for you as a woman," Ava replied.

Karl was dumbfounded.

"Or have younot actually been in love with me all these years?" Ava asked, when he still didn't speak.

He cleared his throat, struggling to reign his emotions, and respond in a way that was deliberate, logical, and educated.

But his reason was failing him.

"Ava...you're in delicate condition at present—"

"Karl, if youdare try and patronize me now with your condescending medical words, I may very well scream," Ava warned.

She was equally as ferocious as adorable with the scowl on her face.

"It's not my intent to insult you at all, Ava. Quite the contrary, in fact," Karl said carefully. Ava rolled her eyes, but her frown began to fade.

"You're saying many things, yet nothing at all, Karl dear," Ava murmured. Karl sighed and looked downward.

"I'm not good enough for a woman like you," he replied quietly. He could hear her gasp next to him, and he wondered if she would start laughing again.

He truly hoped she wouldn't, for that was a form of humiliation he was not prepared to handle.

But instead, Ava reached for his chin again, positioning his face precisely where she wanted it to be.

Directly in front of her.

"You are a rare man, Karl. You are kind. You are gentle. You aregood. It is I who is not good enough for you," Ava said.

He struggled to find some semblance of humor in her eyes. Some evidence to confirm that she was mocking him, in her sweetly charming way.

But it appeared that Ava was truly sincere.

Karl didn't want to allow himself to believe she felt anything close to the depth of love he'd indeed been carrying for her in secret for all these years.

But despite his best efforts, his heart still remained blindly hopeful.

"You're not meant to be the wife of a mere doctor, Ava," Karl said, before he could help himself.

And for a moment, he was certain he'd discovered a new form of disease, the lethal malady of sudden death by embarrassment.

It was one thing to have an affair with her. He would gladly service her sexually, as much as she desired, for he could easily find joy simply in spending his life pleasing her in secret. Any amount of Ava was more than he deserved.

It was a fanciful, overly ambitious dream to hope to call her his wife. It was a dream he'd preserved for years, but had long accepted would never come true. She'd been promised to Renz's half brother a mere three months after she'd made her debut, a man who'd amassed enough wealth to rival her own family.

He'd never stood a chance for a woman like her, so he'd never bothered trying.

"I would proudly be the wife of a doctor. If you would have me, that is," Ava said.

He watched her as she elegantly stood from the lounge, just to fall to her knees below him, and take his left hand in hers.

Even though he now sat even taller than her where she knelt, he felt captivated by her sheer beauty, her grace.

"Ava...your husband just died," Karl reminded. The humor briefly returned to her eyes.

"Indeed he did. And so did his son. I've been surrounded by death...but I refuse to spend what remains of my youth in grief. I have suffered long enough," Ava said determinedly.

And truly she had.

He never wanted her to suffer, ever again.

"You...would take me as your husband?" Karl asked, still not quite believing what the assertive woman was offering.

"If you would take me as your wife," Ava corrected. She looked at him in a way that was as bashful as it was powerful, and he knew he could refuse her nothing.

In all of his boyish dreams of marrying the beautiful Ava, not once did he imagine thatshe would be the one proposing tohim.

But that was what he loved most about her.

She rejected convention, and always behaved exactly as she pleased with pride.

Despite all of her suffering, Ava still lived a life of light. Of humor. Of wit.

Of...fun.

So he decided to respond in the way he knew she'd appreciate the most.

"I'll need some time to consider your...offer, of course. I've quite enjoyed my liberties as a bachelor, you know," Karl began. A blonde brow arched, and Ava's eyes narrowed in seductive, teasing humor.

"Really now...and just what makes you think you'd even have energy left for yourliberties as a married man? I can be quite the demanding wife," Ava said.

He watched as she slowly removed the blanket protecting her body, revealing her delicate silk dressing gown to his heated gaze that was now far more man than doctor. The fabric was rendered nearly transparent by the glow of the fireplace, and he could just begin to visualize the outline of her naked form beneath.

He knew he should put a stop to this.

But Ava was smiling, the happiest he'd seen her since before her loss.

He wanted her to keep smiling, to remain joyful and free of her grief, even if it would only last for a few minutes.

And he would indeed be settling into a bath of frigid waters immediately after sending his beautiful patient right back to bed.

"Demanding, hmm? And just what kinds of demands would I be expected to adhere to, my dear?" Karl asked. He watched as Ava quickly reached for one of the cushions of the lounge, positioning it beneath her knees.

He cursed himself for not thinking of it sooner.

But then again,just how much time did she plan on spending on her knees with their little game?

"For starters...I'd demand you spend more time disrobed. You're far too handsome to remain this concealed. To demonstrate...your vest and shirt, please," Ava ordered, with a twinkle in her eye.

More grateful than ever that he maintained his commitment to daily sport, Karl obliged Ava, removing his vest and undoing the buttons of his shirt. If she now wanted to inspect the physical fitness of her suitor, then he was quite happy to grant her request.

He could feel her eyes sweep down below his neck to his chest and stomach, and her eyes widened as she paused on his abdominal muscles.

And more color began to bloom in Ava's cheeks.

"To your satisfaction, Ava?" Karl teased. She bit her lip as her eyes flickered back to his, as if snapping out of a daze.

"I find I'm eager to see just whatelse you've been hiding...your pants, Karl," Ava said. He sensed more urgency than humor in her voice.

Reluctantly, Karl reached for her shoulders, and struggled to pull her back to her feet.

"Enough of this game now, Ava. You still need your rest," Karl said gently.

But he could tell even before she responded that the determined woman was havingnone of his current advice.

"What I need more is to feel like a woman again. Indulge me, Karl...if you please. Just for a few moments," Ava pleaded.

And he knew he was lost.

There was no way he could refuse her anything, even as her doctor, when she stared at him with those stunning bright eyes.

It was a strange position to be in, an odd exchange of power that seemed rather precarious, if not entirely volatile. Physically, he was the larger of the two by far, and now he sat towering above her delicate curves.

But there was an undeniable command in Ava's eyes that revealed just how strong she truly was.

At any moment, she could snap her fingers and order him to his knees.

She was an angel before him, a heavenly being blessing him with the gift of her sweet affection. As humble as she was proud, he watched in awe as she moved beneath him, reaching for his trousers with her dainty hands.

"Your pants, Karl," Ava breathed again.

He was wordless as he lifted his hips, allowing her to pull his trousers further down his thighs. His cock sprung forth in earnest, eager for a taste of her, but he resolved to keep his lusts under fierce control.

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