The Practice Bed

Copyright Oggbashan March 2003 The author asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.

This is a work of fiction. The events described here are imaginary; the settings and characters are fictitious and are not intended to represent specific places or living persons.

File: practice Final Version b 5 March 2003

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INTRODUCTION

I was standing in the middle of a large sitting room in Pimlico wearing nothing but my best underpants. I was facing an old fashioned hospital bed that had been pulled to the middle of the room. Stood around it were four young women dressed in student nurse uniforms from the 1950s, with calf length hems, black stockings, starched aprons, headdresses and cuffs.

At that moment I knew that I had been set up and I was about to lose my bet. The attitude of the four women convinced me. They knew I had no chance of winning. How had I got myself into this?

CHAPTER 1 DOVER

It started just after I had taken some friends across to France. They were a group who were to play at a club in a Parisian suburb for a few nights. Their van had broken down but they had been able to arrange to be picked up in Calais. I took them from Pimlico across to Calais and met the French van.

I had agreed to take my friends mainly because they paid me but also because I wanted to take my new vehicle a run. I had recently bought it from my brother who was getting married. It was a customised van that he had modified to be a passion wagon. He had fitted it out beautifully and I had coveted it for months. He had only just completed the conversion when he met his future wife. Now he didn't really need it so I bought it for a bargain price and a promise to help them decorate their new home.

I had enjoyed the run to Dover and the ferry trip to France but now it was the early hours of Sunday morning and I had to drive back to London through a torrential downpour. I left Dover's Eastern Docks through the town because the usual route was blocked by an accident. I was approaching the roundabout that leads to the hill out of Dover towards the A2 when I saw four burdened figures trudging along. As I looked I realised that the four were not only female, they were young women and very wet. Even if they were just going to the top of the hill they might appreciate a lift. I stopped just ahead of them, turned on the inside light, and leaned across to lower the nearside window. A face appeared.

"Want a lift?" I asked.

"Yes, please!" was the instant reply.

"Hop in, then."

Four girls climbed in. Three spread across the fitted seating and one sat beside me in front. I noticed that all had their hair plastered flat on their heads. I pointed to the back of the van.

"You'll find dry towels under the washbasin in the toilet. You look as if you need them."

"Yes, please."

The towels were grabbed and there was furious drying of hair. I kept the van stationary with the heating on full.

"Where are you going?" I asked the girl beside me.

"London."

"London? In this weather?"

"Yes. We are on duty noon tomorrow or rather today. We went to France for the day but missed our ferry and then the train. We had to hitch and we were going to start at the top of the hill. How far are you going?"

"I'm going back to London. I've just taken some friends to France, now I'm going back home. Where are you going in London? It's a big place."

"Pimlico" answered a voice from the back seat.

"Then, ladies, you are in luck. I'm going to Pimlico too."

I turned off the inside light and started up the hill. The van pulled away smoothly as if the weight of four extra people was not worth noticing. My old car would have had trouble doing a hill start with five on board.

I was curious. Four girls living in Pimlico who had to be "on duty" in the morning. I made a guess.

"Are you nurses?" I asked.

"Yes," said the girl beside me. "We work at (name omitted) Hospital."

"You do? And you live in Pimlico? Were you there as student nurses?"

"Yes" was the puzzled reply from my side.

I made a big jump in my thinking.

"Does your flat have a practice bed in the main room?"

There was a silence for several seconds. Then a voice from behind spoke.

"How did you know? We don't know you, do we?"

"No. But the elder brother of one of my friends was engaged to a student nurse at your hospital. They are married now with a family but he told me about the practice bed."

"What did he tell you?" The voice sounded wary and suspicious.

"Just that it was a prominent feature of the main living room and the student nurses used to use it to practise making beds properly. Apparently it has been there through many generations of student nurses. That's all I know."

I detected some relief around me. What didn't I know about that bed? There was silence as I turned at the top of the hill and headed towards London. I turned the headlights on full and increased speed. There were no other vehicles around but I kept the speed down to a steady sixty miles an hour (100kph). Even at that speed it was possible to talk without shouting because of the sound insulation my brother had built into the conversion.

We talked in generalities as I drove. I learned that they were all qualified nurses and that soon they would be splitting up in a couple of months to find their own places in London. Their flat would be passed on to a new intake of student nurses in September. I was beginning to separate them by their voices. I couldn't see much of them because I had to concentrate on my driving. I didn't even know their names and I hadn't mentioned mine.

CHAPTER 2 MOTORWAY SERVICES

The driving rain made the wipers work hard and I had to watch out for pools of standing water. My eyes were getting tired so I suggested that we stopped at the service area on the M2. There was a whispered discussion before they agreed. The woman beside me added:

"We can't afford to buy anything there because we had to pay an extra fare to get back from France. We're cleaned out until pay day next Friday."

"In that case, ladies, allow me to offer to buy you a warm drink at least."

I was feeling cash rich because my friends had paid me well for running them to Dover. I could afford to buy a few drinks at least.

That caused another whispered consultation before they accepted.

I pulled into the service area and we got out under my large golf umbrella. As we entered the foyer I had my first real look at the four of them. To be fair, they weren't looking their best. They were bundles of damp clothing, their hair had been hastily dried and their make-up was showing signs of wear and heavy rain. They rushed into the Ladies room like frightened rabbits bolting for their burrow.

While I waited I searched my wallet. As I thought I had some two for one vouchers for the burger bar. With those and the cash from my friends I could treat them all to a burger meal with their drinks.

I didn't recognise the first to emerge from the Ladies until she walked up to me.

"Hello again," she said. "I'm Marie. The others won't be long."

I gulped. Marie looked stunning. Earlier her brown hair had been stuffed into a baseball cap. Now it spread over her shoulders in soft waves. She had repaired her make-up. Her face which I had not really noticed before was now beautiful. She was still wearing the same crumpled clothes but they were filled by a very desirable woman.

"Hello Marie, I'm Simon."

"Hello Simon."

Her voice was a low contralto. It made my spine shiver. She had been the one sitting beside me in front of the van. This wasn't fair. I'd picked up four anonymous young women and now that I had seen one of them for the first time I thought I was falling in love. If Marie could look so gorgeous, would the others be a disappointment?

Marie spoke to me. She had to repeat what she said because I was still recovering from the shock of her changed appearance.

"Simon," she said "I asked what you do for a living."

"Sorry, Marie. I'm a System Analyst. I work in Victoria."

"So you can walk to work?"

"Yes. It isn't easy to park the van in London so I leave it at home."

She was about to say something when one of her friends came towards us.

"Hi Alex," said Marie. "This is Simon, our driver. Simon, meet Alexandra."

My jaw dropped and I must have looked stupid. Alexandra was not a disappointment. She was a natural redhead with a cute freckled face. Her hair was cut close to her head framing a pert face with an uptilted nose. Her breasts strained at the buttons of her damp coat. When I lifted my eyes from her assets she was smiling at me.

"Hello Simon, lost your voice?" Alexandra asked.

"No." I faltered "No, Alexandra, I'm just recovering from the transformation scene that you two have managed in a few minutes. I brought some bedraggled waifs here. Now ..."

"Now you see us as we really are," Marie interrupted "We don't usually look like bedraggled waifs."

"You might regret those words," added Alexandra "You haven't seen the other two of us yet. You may have a shock."

"I've had two shocks already," I replied "I hadn't realised that I'd picked up such a load of delightful women."

Marie looked at Alexandra. They giggled.

"We are just hard working nurses, Simon," said Alexandra. "We are not models."

I was about to reply when another woman joined them.

Alexandra said "This is Simon. He is complaining that we don't look as we did when he stopped for us."

"I should hope not," the woman replied. "I never look my best when I'm soaked through. Hello, Simon. I'm Jayne."

"Hello Jayne." I replied. How many more shocks could I take? Jayne was a natural blonde whose straight hair swung alluringly around her face. Whenever she moved the curtains of her hair caressed either one side of her face or the other. It was hair that I would like to explore with gentle fingers. Then she surprised me. She kissed my cheek, brushing her wonderful hair against my face. I felt my skin pale.

"Don't tell me," Jayne said "You two haven't said thank you to Simon properly, have you?"

"No, not really," said Marie "but now you have started ..."

Marie kissed my left cheek. Alexandra kissed the right, pressing her breasts against me.

"Can I join in?" asked another voice. "I seem to missing something."

Then I was kissed full on the lips while Marie and Alexandra rested their hands on my arms.

"Why do I always have to show you English girls how to greet a man properly?"

"Ignore that, Simon," said Alexandra. "She is only half-Italian but tries to pretend that she is a hot blooded Mediterranean man-eater. This is Gianetta."

"Hello Gianetta," I said.

"Well, Simon? Are you a gentleman or not?" Gianetta asked.

I just goggled at her. Gianetta had gleaming black hair and high cheekbones. Even if she was only half Italian she had the right looks to be a starlet in a Roman epic film. Before I could get my brain in gear, Marie solved my dilemma.

"Gianetta means that you should kiss her back. She always wants another kiss."

I kissed Gianetta. That seemed a good idea at the time. Then Marie kissed me, I kissed her. Alexandra followed, then Jayne showed that English girls could kiss as well as half-Italians.

Marie said "Now that we are properly introduced, Simon, I'd love that warm drink if it is still on offer after you have seen what we really look like."

"If you want, I can do better than that." I showed them the two for one vouchers. "With these I can afford burger meals for all of us. Tempted?"

"Yes!" came the chorus.

Alexandra added "Yes please, Simon. We haven't eaten since yesterday. I'm famished."

So we had burger meals. I ordered six meals because it was the same price as five. The sixth meal was shared between the four of them.

CHAPTER 3 THE BET

I left them for a while to wash my hands. When I returned they had obviously been discussing something.

"Sit down please, Simon." Marie asked. "Have you told us all you know about the practice bed?"

It seemed an odd question. I thought hard about it. There was nothing else.

"Yes. I've told you all that I know. I haven't forgotten anything. I was just told that the bed was in the flat and was used to practise bed-making."

Marie looked at the others. I detected a nod or two.

"Then we would like to make a bet with you."

This was interesting. I would like to see these four again. I was too excited by the chance of a closer relationship to think clearly. Whatever the bet was, I could not turn it down.

"What bet?"

"We bet you that we could make the bed so effectively that you would not be able to get out of it in say ten minutes."

"What?"

"We will make the bed around you. We have practised so well that you will not be able to wriggle out of the bed once it is made." Marie explained. "The bet is that you will be unable to get out of the bed inside ten minutes."

"What do I win if I succeed in getting out of bed?"

"You win four evening meals, each cooked by us. Gianetta is fantastic with Italian food. The rest of us are reasonable cooks."

"And if I lose?"

"Then you have to do whatever we want for the rest of the evening. Even if you lose you will still get a meal but just whatever we are having for dinner that evening, not a specially cooked meal."

"I accept the bet. When?"

Marie looked at the others.

"Friday night?"

The others nodded.

"Are you free this Friday evening, Simon?"

"For you ladies, yes. I am free."

"OK. Can you please come early that evening, say 6 o'clock?"

"Yes, Marie, I can do that."

"Then that is settled. One last thing. We don't want the sheets made dirty so you would have to strip to your underpants. So it might be an idea not to wear old saggy Y-fronts."

This was getting better and better. The warmth in my groin was almost unbearable.

"I understand, Marie."

I didn't really. They were working to a well-rehearsed plot that several generations of student nurses had used. I didn't know that I had been set up as their victim.

That was it. We climbed back into the van. I drove them to Pimlico and delivered them to their flat. I drowned in a sea of farewell kisses which made me determined to be back with them on Friday evening. I drove the short distance to my flat in a rosy haze.

CHAPTER 4 THE NURSES' FLAT

All week my dreams were full of four incredibly attractive young women. The week seemed very long until Friday afternoon. I rushed back from work for a shave and shower. I loaded a bag with three bottles of the wine I had brought from France and a few other personal items.

Marie opened the door of their flat. I did a double take. She was dressed as a 1950s student nurse, not a present day one. She had a pink candy-striped dress with a full skirt falling well below her knees. Her white apron, her cuffs and the massive intricately folded headdress were starched. Her feet were in sensible black shoes and the black stockings emphasised her shapely legs. I stood and stared. Marie's hair was hidden under her headdress but the overall effect was stunning.

"What ...?" was about all I could manage to say.

"Hello, Simon. Do you like my uniform?" Marie twirled around making her skirt flare out widely.

"Y...yes!" I spluttered. "But why?"

"It is part of the event. Come on in."

Marie took my bag from me and put it down in the hall. I followed her to the large living room. It had three windows that would look out to the street but the curtains were closed. Against the opposite wall were two three-seater settees. The famous bed was prominent in the centre of the room. Marks on the carpet showed that its head was usually against the wall between two of the windows. Beside the bed were Marie's flat mates, Alexandra, Jayne and Gianetta, also wearing the 1950s uniform. Gianetta came over to me and kissed me. I kissed her back. Then Marie claimed me. Jayne's hair didn't swing against my cheek this time. Like the others, her hair was up under her starched headdress. Alexandra kissed me last. Her hair hadn't needed to be put up and its red seemed even brighter against the white of her headdress.

Marie was asking me something. I disentangled myself from Alexandra's kiss.

"Put that woman down!" Marie teased. "What I said was, would you like a cup of coffee before we find out whether you win or lose?"

"Yes, please. I am still puzzled by the way all of you are dressed. Why the 1950s look?"

Marie left towards the kitchen but Jayne answered my question.

"This bed has been here since at least the 1950s. This is probably the last time that we four will use it so we thought that we would make a big production of this evening - not just for you but for us as well. We have hated this bed as we struggled to get bedmaking just right. We have loved it because we have had fun with it. Soon we must pass it on to another class of student nurses so we decided to celebrate what it has meant to us. You have given us one more opportunity to test our skills. Since it is an old bed we thought we would dress appropriately. We had four 1950s uniforms so here we are. It is sometime since the four of us have made the old bed together. I hope we haven't forgotten how. You will find out."

"I think that the bed is older than the 1950s, perhaps 30s or even earlier than that." Alexandra added "There are very few like it left in the National Health Service or anywhere else. The tradition is that one of the student nurses in the 1950s just could not learn how to make a bed to Matron's standards. She was in real danger of failing to become a nurse so her Daddy bought her this one to practise on. It must have been assembled up here in the flat. There is no way it could have come up the stairs or through the windows. So here it has stayed. It still works very well."

"Works?" I queried.

"Oh yes. It has attachments for traction and suspension. They are stowed underneath. The head lifts up on a ratchet to prop the patient's head and shoulders. There are side rails that fold up to hold a restless patient in. There is even a stand for attaching drips or enema bottles. In its day it was a very expensive bed."

Marie came back with the coffee. We sat on the two settees. I looked warily at the bed. Gianetta noticed.

"It won't bite, Simon. None of the attachments are in place. We will just make the bed as it is meant to be made. It won't hurt."

I laughed nervously.

"No, Simon, it won't hurt you," said Marie in her wonderful contralto voice that caressed my ears "and we won't hurt you either. We are very grateful to you for bringing us back from Dover, and for feeding us when we were starving. Whether you win the bet or not you will have at least one evening to remember us by."

Gianetta snuggled up beside me. I should have known that Gianetta would be one of the two beside me. Whether it was an act or not I already expected Gianetta to be close to any available male.

Gianetta whispered in my ear. "You WILL enjoy yourself, Simon. So will we." Her apron rustled as she moved closer to me. She kissed me on the cheek. "Now it is time for your strip tease." She took the empty coffee mug from my hand.

"Hold it, Gianetta." Jayne ordered "We don't want to embarrass Simon. He can strip while we turn our backs."

So I did. They moved to stand two each side of the bed facing the curtains. I stripped to my underpants and folded my discarded clothes on the settee. I stepped away from the settee and stood in the middle of the room.

"I'm ready now" I said. They turned to face me. This was where I started this story. These four women knew something I didn't. They KNEW that I would lose the bet. The look on their faces was expectant without any hint of concern that I might win.

CHAPTER 5 THE BED IS MADE