The Timefull Cruise

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This isn't H. G. Well's The Time Machine!
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I

I'm not the type to go on a cruise, but there I was. I'm really more of a 'see the old fort or castle, stay in the bed and breakfast, drive around the wilderness to see wild animals, go whale watching' type guy. It was my thoughtful friends that had set me up for an ocean cruise. They arranged the whole thing and then sprung it on me.

The girlfriend I'd been with for the last year and a half had suddenly decided that I wasn't Mr. Right so we split up. I suppose I should have been choked up about the whole thing, but I wasn't. Early on in our relationship she had told me that she was only with me for the sex. Being a guy, I wasn't all that upset about her reason behind the relationship. Actually, I found it quite flattering.

My friends assumed that I was broken up inside because they believed I was an emotionally sensitive guy and because I didn't talk much about the break-up. They were right on with number one, but dead wrong on number two. I'd never been the type to gossip about my bedroom conquests. Millie was a nice girl, well a nice girl in her early thirties, but she was a little screwed up in the head. While she was fun to be with, and I would miss the sex, I also knew there were better lovers than her out there and I would eventually find someone else.

There was the other thing, but I didn't expect them to understand how I felt about that. Nor had I discussed the matter with them as it seemed a deeply personal issue.

Now, you know the old joke about guys never looking at a map, or running into a store, grabbing the clothes they want and buying them without trying them on? Well, my friends are like that.

So I sighed in futility as I watched all the elderly couples lining up for the exact same ocean cruise that my friends had sent me on. There wasn't a single person under sixty that I could see. And it wasn't singles boarding the ship, it was all couples. At thirty-five I wasn't about to go after a senior citizen, no matter how rich she was, but if these had all been unmarried people then I might at least find some interested in the same diversions that I was. I prayed that there might be some pretty and unattached women working on the ship, if not then this trip was hardly going to have any therapeutic value.

Instead of running away, I approached the desk and pleasantly handed over my ticket to the cruise ship employee. I pointedly ignored the look of surprise from the teenage girl at the counter. Then I followed my soon to be ship mates to the gangplank.

It was a big ship. Looking at my ticket I wondered how I was ever going to find my berth. Did they call them berths? Most of my knowledge of sea travel came from an old Humphrey Bogart war movie and A Night to Remember. The last movie I mentioned may not be the best one to use as a reference for an ocean cruise.

I looked around and observed that my fellow passengers had not noticed me yet, or maybe they had and simply assumed I was here on business. There was an oddly excited skinny fellow at the gate who seemed to be desperately trying to get my attention. Finally he started yelling at me.

"Don't you dare ignore me! You've got my ticket!"

Now people started to notice me, as they looked at the source of noise and saw him pointing directly at me. I shrugged my shoulders at him. I had no idea who he was.

"Come here! I'll pay you for the ticket! I'll give you double what it cost you!"

Now I stopped and took a couple of steps towards him. I could take the money and get a cruise on another ship. Maybe something like a singles cruise where the women are all liquored up and you spend each night with a different girl. I'd never done something like that before and I smiled at the possibility of debauchery.

"Don't give me that stupid smile, you dumb ape! Double is a fair price to pay for your ticket! Now get over here quick!"

That did it. I've been told I had a stubborn streak, actually by everyone who ever knew me. I turned around and apologetically got back in line. I thanked the couple behind me and told them that I thought I knew the guy. They simply smiled affably.

"Get back here you asshole!" The skinny screwball began to shake the fence. I spied a couple of security guards making their way over to him and they caught up with him just as he was beginning to climb over the fence. What a screwball! Did he have some fetish for old people?

As I walked up the gangplank, I heard him raising his ante on my ticket. The highest I heard was ten times what I paid for it. If he'd been polite and asked me a little earlier, I might have given him the ticket for the original price.

The staff on the ship had us sorted out and in our cabins, or at least directed to our cabins, very quickly. My cabin was bigger than I expected and fairly high up on the side of the ship. I guessed my friends had splurged, after all. I decided that I'd have to get each of them something nice as a thank you.

I stayed in my room until it was time for dinner, preferring to relax a little and not being interested in watching as the ship left the harbour. I unpacked, listened to the radio and read the brochures the cruise line had provided.

You know, I thought cruise ships went from port to port, allowing the passengers to disembark briefly and see the sights, but this one didn't. I would be trapped aboard with a legion of elderly couples. With increasing frustration, I decided that there had better be at least one smoking-hot babe working on this ship who found me to be the sexiest thing she has seen in a long time. Aw, who was I kidding? My tastes ran from pretty to gorgeous. If I met a super-model the first thing I'd think would be: do I have to talk slowly to her?

II

I dressed in semi-formal attire for dinner. As I was seated, I was glad to see that some of the other men at the table were also wearing jackets and ties. The women were all...I think the phrase was...dressed to the nines.

I was greeted warmly and my dining companions were talkative and curious about what I was doing aboard. I told them the truth, well most of it.

"So this must be quite a let down to you then, Gerrald," said Colonel Clink. Well, that wasn't his name, but he wore a monocle. I had never seen someone wear a monocle in real life before.

"It's not so bad. I probably won't find much romance on this trip, but the company is pleasant." I raised my glass to them and then sampled a mouthful. This was good wine and I guess my surprise showed on my face.

"Gerrald, dear," said a near-sighted seventy year old as she patted my hand, "my husband Stan is a bit of a wine connoisseur. He sent the waiter back to return with a better vintage."

Stan added his two cents. "One of the benefits of age is the knowledge and experience you gather. But looking at you, sir, I think you understand that very well." I nodded pleasantly at him, indicating agreement. I thought that this cruise might have more subtle pleasures to savour as it appeared increasingly unlikely that I would get to satisfy my more basic urges.

I could see one of the other ladies wished to say something, but she kept biting her lip. I dug into my prime rib and found it tender and delicious. Finally the lady's husband coaxed his hesitant wife into speaking.

"Well, Gerry, I know you might think I'm playing matchmaker, but we met a single woman at dinner last night and she is just a few years younger than you. I think she said she was thirty-one?" she looked at her husband for confirmation.

"Yes, Penny said she was thirty-one. She was quite vivacious. Although, I don't think she would be happy with anyone bandying her age about," he chided his wife.

I was a little dumbfounded. "Well, thank you for the information, Mr and Mrs. Whitehouse, but I don't see how that makes any difference to my situation on the ship."

Now Mrs. Whitehouse looked confused. "But don't you see? She's on the ship, too. We had dinner with her last night."

The Professor spoke up. "That doesn't follow. Just because you had dinner with someone on shore, how was our young friend supposed to know that she would be on the ship?" The Professor's wife nodded vigorously.

There were a few confused comments around the table. I wasn't really listening to them. A rather pretty waitress was making her way around the tables with a dessert tray. My eyes were focussed on the young woman's shapely bottom as she leaned over tables. Her slacks fit her very well.

Apparently, my new friends were getting into quite an argument. I suggested that perhaps the wine was stronger at sea and maybe everyone could do with a little dancing, now that dinner was finished. Cooler heads seemed to prevail. Or maybe no one wanted to hold a grudge based on a misunderstanding at the beginning of the cruise. We were going to be stuck together on this ship for two and a half weeks.

As my dinner companions left, I waited for the dessert girl to look over to my table and then waved for her attention. She smiled and came over immediately.

"What will you have, sir?" She wore a dark vest over a frilly, white blouse. She had long, blonde hair and blue eyes.

"What would you recommend?"

"The chocolate cheesecake, sir." I nodded in response.

As she put the plate in front of me I decided to see how friendly the workers here were. "So is there somewhere for the passengers to dance on this ship?"

"Yes, sir. You go out that door, down the hall on your right and then through the double doors. It's named the Little Mermaid Lounge."

She smelled wonderful. "So do employees go dancing?"

She gave me the old 'I know exactly what you're thinking' look. "Not with passengers, sir. My boyfriend and I sometimes go dancing there late at night, after most of the passengers have retired."

"Ah. Thank you for the dessert."

She smiled prettily and headed for another table. I had the feeling that this was going to be a very long cruise. I left the dining room and wandered around the deck most of the evening, enjoying the night sky and the cool sea air before retiring.

III

I was riding a roller coaster. Up and down it went, sliding smoothly over the rails. Up, up, up and I sat up straight in the last seat and then down, down, down into a trough. There was a girl in the first car, sitting so she was facing me. She was smiling, but I could not make out her face.

Up the coaster went, over another big crest, and then down it dropped into the trough. The coaster hummed along the rails; it didn't rattle and roar. Each crest seemed higher than the last and the troughs somehow got deeper, as well.

I heard a slurp and the roller coaster faded into oblivion. All that was left of the dream was the girl's sweet Cheshire Cat mouth, grinning madly at me. And then it opened into an 'o'.

There was another slurp and I felt a pull on my penis. I opened my eyes and looked down. I wasn't afraid. After all, whatever was going on south of my belly button felt damn good.

I was in bed and the sheets were missing. I felt soft, wet lips kiss the head of my hardening cock. And then they spread over it and the mouth engulfed me at least halfway down the shaft.

I lifted my head and saw long, red hair spilled over my groin. A hand reached up and brushed some of it off to one side and behind an ear. She was lovely. She tilted her head to look up at me and her sparkling, green eyes mesmerized me. Whoever she was, I silently vowed that I would refuse her nothing as long as she continued.

Despite her claims, Millie had never been that good at oral sex, as she preferred to receive rather than to give. Whoever this ball of fire was though, she knew what she was doing and was concentrating on the matter on her hands. If we had hit an iceberg I don't think either of us would have left the room.

She smiled at me and removed her mouth from my erection. She continued pumping with her right hand.

"Does that feel good?"

I nodded.

She licked the shaft, beginning at the base and working her way up slowly. By the time she reached the tip most of my muscles had tensed up. She chuckled and put her mouth over the head again. Her head bobbed slowly, her delicate face hidden by her long hair.

I could feel a tingling in my balls, as if the sperm were getting ready for their charge. Wouldn't they be surprised when they found no ova. On the other hand, if I were a sperm I think I should be equally as happy to pour over those ruby lips, across that skilled tongue and down that gorgeous woman's throat. What a way to go.

I concentrated on holding my orgasm back. Orgasms were a lot of fun, but so far what this beauty was doing with her mouth was better than any orgasm I had ever had. I just wanted it to continue forever, but I could feel the pressure building.

I decided I had to warn her. Why was I always stupid enough to be a gentleman?

"I'm close," I whispered.

She pushed her hair over her head, looked me in the eye and said "anytime you're ready." Then she put her mouth back over my erection and pushed me deep into her mouth.

There was almost a 'twang' and I felt the rhythmic pumping of my seed, shooting from my balls to my cock and then into her mouth.

Surprised, she raised her head a little and then began gulping, swallowing my cum. I could feel her tongue running over the top of my erection as I closed my eyes. This was the best orgasm I'd ever had. I felt as if my balls had emptied themselves. My cock felt cleaned out and all my muscles were relaxing.

Hedonism could be truly wonderful and I revelled in it while she generously licked me clean. How would I ever thank her for such an experience? Well, I knew I'd give it a damn good try. What's good for the gander is good for the goose and I wondered exactly how sweet tasting her own juices would be.

The bottom of the bed bounced. I looked around through half-open lids and just caught a glimpse of her round bottom as she slipped into the bathroom. I heard water running in the sink and some splashing.

What would I say to her when she came out?

I glanced at the window and saw blackness outside. What time was it? Who really cared? Does anybody know what time it is? Does anybody really care...

I felt her lips on mine and opened my eyes. It wasn't a passionate kiss; it was a very friendly hello or goodbye kiss. She had on a red gown that showed a bit of cleavage and had a long slit down one side of the skirt.

"I have to go. I don't want anyone to see me sneaking out of your room." She leaned over and kissed me again. "Go back to sleep, Gerry."

She walked over to the door, picked up her shoes, gave me a quick wave and then slipped out.

I tried to sit up but I was still spent. I think the second kiss and the wave meant this was only a temporary goodbye, but who the hell was she?

IV

When I woke up I decided to search for my mysterious benefactor. If she was-ahem-just aggressive in her style of introduction then I wanted to get to know much more about her. If she just liked giving men blowjobs, then I still wanted to get to know her better. Whether it meant a relationship or just one more experience of her soft lips wrapped around my cock, I was going to find her.

A glance out the window showed me that it was a beautiful day. As I dressed in shorts and a light, cotton shirt I considered my options. I was experienced at finding people and it shouldn't be too difficult with everyone stuck on this cruise ship. Being a police detective had its advantages at times.

Now, she was either this Penny that one couple had mentioned at dinner the night before or she was an employee of the cruise line. I might spot her by chance if I just wandered the ship, but what if she were holed up somewhere I couldn't enter without a preposterous lie? Like a ladies room? Or her own cabin? I would have to be systematic in my investigation.

I locked my cabin door as I left and then paused. How in Hell had she got into my room, in the first place? The door had been locked. If she worked on the ship she might have access to keys and that would have allowed her to sneak into my room at some point early this morning. On the other hand, women could seem oh so innocent and in need of help at times and she may have wheedled someone on the ship to open the door for her. This was getting me nowhere.

I had to find the Whitehouses and get a good description of this Penny they were talking about. If the descriptions didn't match, then I could ask the staff about this very charitable girl.

Half an hour later, I found the couple on one of the upper decks, chatting at the rail.

"Hello, folks. How are you two doing?" I asked, pleasantly.

"We're both loving this cruise. How have you been? We haven't seen you for a couple of days," answered Mr. Whitehouse.

Could they be senile? "I'm doing great. I was hoping you two could help me with something."

"Sure Gerry. What is it?" asked Mrs. Whitehouse.

"Well, I was wondering if you could describe Penny for me."

They both gave me surprised looks. "What is this, some weird game that you young people play?" asked the husband.

"Now, now. Just play along, dear." Mrs. Whitehouse then turned to me. "She has an easy laugh, seems quite intelligent and is as charming as you are, Gerry. I think you two make a good couple."

"That's not what I mean. What does she look like?" This old bird just wouldn't give up on the matchmaking.

Again, both of them looked at me in surprise. "You've forgotten already?" Mr. Whitehouse shook his head in wonder. "She has long red hair, green eyes, a good figure and is perhaps about five and a half feet tall."

Bingo! The wonder woman! Now how do I meet her?

"Gerry, have you forgotten what she looks like already?" asked Mrs. Whitehouse. "The way you two were dancing so close last night and for so many dances! It was quite romantic. Don't let her slip out of your fingers. There will be a thousand young men waiting to trip her up once she leaves the ship. You only have another week and a half before the cruise is over."

Before I could respond, her husband grabbed her arm. "Let's get going, dear. I want to play in the pool and have time to dry off before brunch."

I said goodbye to them as they walked away. What a screwy old couple, I thought. It was a three week cruise, not a week and a half. And I didn't go dancing last night. I hoped their description of Penny was reliable. Then again, maybe the wife was suffering from dementia and the husband remembered things clearly and he just goes along with what she says. It would explain everything.

For the rest of the morning, I scoured much of the ship searching for Penny. I did not see her once. I went for lunch and then hung around for awhile afterwards in case Penny arrived late. No luck. Late in the afternoon, I was becoming perplexed. I should have seen some sign of her. Could it be possible that she was hiding from me?

If she was deliberately hiding from me, then it would take time to find her. Also, there was my resistance to searching for someone who did something nice for me and then didn't want to be found. If she was concealing herself, then maybe she would introduce herself to me or maybe she wouldn't, but it would all be done on her terms.

There was one last place I wanted to check: the hold. She could have slipped down there unseen and hidden herself in complete privacy. But why resort to the hold when she had a comfortable room? I didn't have all the answers. Maybe she assumed that I might be able to locate her room. I wasn't about to ask around, though. That type of question would get me flagged as a suspicious character very quickly, despite the fact that my desire to meet Penny was innocent...maybe innocent was the wrong word.

I jumped a gate where the sign stated 'staff only' and proceeded down the stairs. The map of the ship indicated this stair led to a hallway that, in turn, led to the main hold. Soon enough, I was standing in the doorway letting my eyes adjust to the dimly lit storage room.