There and Back Again Ch. 159

I took pity on him – really, there was no way of knowing how long that couch was going to last – and used every skill I'd developed over a year with him to bring him off quickly. I caressed his shaft, used my lips and tongue to torment his aching length, and kept intense eye contact with him the entire time, allowing my naked body to brush against his legs, my dark hair to fall forward and tickle at the small amount of exposed skin. It took only a few moments before he was shuddering underneath me, my name on his lips as he came explosively; in that moment of release, he jerked – and let go his hold on the wall.

With a tremendous crash and a few flying splinters, he plummeted to the ground; his quick reflexes were the only reason I wasn't crushed under his falling legs, and he scooped me up as he fell, so I ended up half on top of him as he sprawled across the destroyed piece of furniture, his softening erection still twitching in my hand. As the dust settled, I uncurled and pushed up onto my hands and knees over him, making eye contact as an embarrassed flush hit me hard enough to make me dizzy. We locked gazes for one, frozen, shocked moment, and then both broke out in loud, uncontrollable guffaws, my forehead dropping onto his shoulder as we convulsed in laughter.

We ended up curled together in the wreckage, me stark naked and covered in tiny scratches from the shrapnel, his groin still protruding through the open laces of his trousers, both of us covered with a layer of dust, holding onto each other as we subsided into fits of giggles. Our bodies shaking together had interesting effects of both of us – and our libidos – and, still chuckling, Alistair rolled us, leaning down to kiss me, his hips falling naturally into the gap between my thighs, his half-hard erection pressing up against my core. I gasped and tilted my hips under him, welcoming him – and we might have been there another hour if it hadn't been for a discreet cough in the hallway right outside the door.

"My Lady?" I heard the guard who'd followed me call out, and Alistair and I sprang apart like teenagers who'd just been caught canoodling by our parents. "Are you alright? I heard a crash."

Stifling the mortified titter that tried to escape, I jumped to my feet, offering Alistair a hand up. "I'm fine!" I called, hoping against hope that she hadn't come barging into the room while we'd been too busy to notice. "You can wait outside – I'll be right out."

As I heard her footsteps recede, I started rifling through the wreckage looking for my dress, even as Alistair frantically tied the laces on his trousers; we avoided further eye contact in case we started laughing again. I finally found my dress, now liberally coated in dust, and pulled it on over my head; Alistair rescued the pillow from underneath the main seat of the couch. We spent a moment dusting each other off, with no discernible benefit; Alistair pulled a few splinters from my hair and then wrapped his arms around me, pulling me close.

We held each other for a moment before he tilted my chin up and kissed me softly. "To be continued," he whispered, and I grinned and nodded my agreement. "I love you, Sierra."

I nodded, smiling widely. "I know." And I really, really did. "I love you too."

We walked out into the hallway together, blushing and smiling and covered in dust, hoping to make it back to our quarters before anyone saw us. Any hope that my guard hadn't caught us in flagrante was lost when she turned purple and immediately avoided eye contact; she nodded and fell back to follow us as we made our way through darkened hallways. Alistair's guard was nowhere to be seen, whether following secretly or whether mine had sent his away, I wasn't sure.

I was just relieved that it was still early enough that no one else was up and around yet.

We left the embarrassed guard outside our quarters and climbed into the shower together. It might have been more interesting if it hadn't been for the sting of the dozens of tiny scratches that I had to clean out before getting dressed for the day. Neither of us had slept much, but it was the day Anders, Solona, Rolan, Wulf, and Conrad were leaving, so going back to bed wasn't really an option. I dressed simply, quaffing a small healing potion to deal with my scratches – I wasn't about to ask Anders or Donal for healing, that was for sure – and once we were ready, Alistair and I descended to the dining room together hand-in-hand. My guard had been replaced by another, who smiled at us without any hint of embarrassment; a second guard, a somewhat sour-looking young man, followed behind, and I assumed he was Alistair's guard, but neither seemed to have any idea of the spectacle they'd missed earlier. I'm going to have to give that girl a raise!

We were the first down for breakfast, but were rapidly joined by everyone else – those that were leaving, and those of us staying behind to say goodbye. Solona looked somewhat intimidated – it was the first meal she'd spent with the crowd since returning from the Circle – but she handled it well, even joking good-naturedly with the people around her. Wulf looked mostly eager to get moving, and I briefly wished to be a fly on the wall for his reunion with Kallian. Conrad looked somewhat morose – a more and more common state, lately; the others looked mostly busy and stressed, trying to do some last-minute packing and organising for their relocation.

Good-byes were hard. The courtyard was chaos, with the group of soldiers accompanying the five Wardens to Denerim as well as all the people staying behind. I hugged Solona and made her promise to write regularly. She looked somewhat haggard, her eyes still red-rimmed from the crying the day before. "You're going to be okay, you know."

She shrugged, not convinced. "I might, but he won't." Her eyes darted over to the healer before she looked away resolutely. "I knew so many people who were treated...differently, at the Circle, afterwards..." She trailed off, but I knew what she meant: after being raped. No one ever knows what to say, or how to help especially when there's no chance for justice. "That was part of the worst of it, for those who went through it. I never thought he'd be one of the ones to be..." She sighed, shoulders slumped.

"You know," I said, thinking of my recent experiences and knack for miscommunication with my partner, "you could try just...saying that to him. I make that mistake a lot – I never just ask, I always worry and assume."

She snorted delicately. "Say what? 'Wanna fuck?'" She plastered a fake smile on her face.

I laughed. "You might be surprised how well that would work. But maybe you should start with 'Why won't you touch me?' or even 'I'm not broken so please don't treat me like I am. I'm a big girl and I get to decide when I'm ready to have my life back.'"

She looked at me, her false smile fading. "You think?"

I glanced at Alistair, who was laughing at something Conrad said; seeming to sense my gaze, he smiled at me warmly and winked, and I blushed. I looked back at Solona. "If I'd said that, I'd have saved myself a lot of grief. And it seems like...maybe you've got nothing to lose?"

She considered it, and a small, real smile tickled at the corner of her lips. "Maybe I'll try it."

I giggled. "Tell him I said to 'get naked and try not to clench up,' and then rock his world."

She laughed, clapping her hand over her mouth in surprise at the noise, and then turned scarlet. "Sierra!"

I grinned unrepentantly. "By the way, I packed you my old, sound-proofed tent. Do take care of it, would you?"

I left her standing there, dazed but smiling, to let Jowan say his goodbyes. I turned instead and even offered a hug to Rolan, who rolled his eyes but allowed it. "Take care of them," I whispered, gesturing to the two mages with my head.

He nodded seriously. "With my life," he replied, and I knew he meant it.

Wulf was halfway out the door before I could say anything, though he winked his one brown eye at me and nodded when he caught me scowling in his direction. Conrad, on the other hand, swept me up into an ostentatious bear hug, swinging me around as I laughed until Alistair staggered him with a 'friendly' punch.

"You'll be back soon," I asserted. "I know you'll be motivated to find lots of recruits so someone can take your place." He flushed, and I grinned, before dropping my voice. "She'll come, I'm sure of it. And I won't let her go through until you've seen her, I swear it."

He sighed. "She'll do as she likes, we both know that." His smile was wistful. "I wouldn't want her any other way. But I appreciate that you'll try."

I chuckled. "I think I have a few very convincing arguments to persuade her."

He laughed. "That I should like to see." His tone sounded so much like Morrigan that we both giggled again, and he finally shouldered his pack and headed to the door.

That left Anders. I hugged the mage, who returned it enthusiastically. "You're an idiot, you know," I whispered in his ear.

He let me go and looked down at me, confused. "What?"

I rolled my eyes, reached up and grabbed him by the ear, dragging him down to my level. "Stop blaming yourself. Stop treating her like she's fragile – or tainted. Stop thinking you get to control, or decide, how she feels." His eyes widened at my bluntness, and I scowled at him. "And for Andraste's sake, please stop giving out sex and relationship advice to other people. You suck at it, Anders! Besides, people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones."

His eyebrows had gone up practically past his hairline, and he glanced from me to Alistair and back. "Oh. Um." He shook his head sheepishly. "Sorry?"

I smiled then. "Better. Now, go. And tonight, after you set up camp, ask her first, of course, but then do what you did in the library back in Orzammar."

He stammered, blushing, standing up straight as I released his ear. "You...think? Really?"

I waved my finger under his nose like a mother chastising her children. "Yes really. You can thank me later." I turned to walk away, but looked over my shoulder at him with a wave. "Don't wreck my tent!"

********

Note: I have been working on a spin-off on how Nate and Leliana got together while Sierra wasn't looking. I'll start publishing it next week. That means this will be on a brief hiatus while that story gets published. Keep your eyes peeled!