Things Happen For A Reason Ch. 04

"I'm going out tonight with Bree-Anne," had been her only answer, a bit forcefully, as if she were challenging Luke to try and stop her. "We're going to that new club Riley was telling you about. If you can pull yourself away from work, maybe you can join us later?"

"Or we could both stay home," Luke had suggested. "We could rent a movie, relax, order takeout. We haven't done that in a while."

"You're working on a big case," she reminded him, not wanting to stay at home. She'd grown to need her nights out with Bree-Anne in order to survive. If she was out partying, drinking, she didn't have to remember her pain, the pain she always felt when she was here alone or with her husband. The pain she felt at work, surrounded by little children who left each afternoon with parents who often took them for granted.

"Just be careful," had been Luke's reply, sounding weary and defeated. "Call me or someone if you girls get drunk. I don't want you driving home in that condition."

"We will. Love you," she'd said automatically with a chaste peck on the cheek as she'd grabbed her keys and purse and left him standing there.

When she and Bree-Anne got to the club, Sarah was instantly on the lookout for Riley. He had been a good friend to her these past couple of months, listening patiently when she needed to vent, encouraging her, offering to help in whatever way she needed. She tried talking to Bree-Anne, but the other woman didn't even like kids and often tried to change the subject whenever Sarah brought up her lost child. To Bree-Anne, nothing seemed to matter that didn't include money, sex or a good time.

Bree-Anne certainly noticed Sarah's interest in Riley, and, smiling, pointed out his tall form dancing with another woman on the dance floor. Sarah had felt a pang of jealousy before she reminded herself she had no right to feel that way. Riley was Luke's best friend, for god's sake! Even so, she noticed the woman sliding her arms around his neck, running her hands through his silky brown hair, and pressing her hips forward invitingly.

"I'm sure he wouldn't mind if you cut in," Bree-Anne had encouraged. "Go on, have a little fun. I'll go get us some drinks."

Nervously, Sarah did just that, encouraged even more when Riley spotted her approach and pulled free from the clinging tart, his eyes and smile betraying how happy he was to see her.

"Where's Luke?" he bent to ask while bestowing a kiss on the side of her lips. It should have unnerved her, that kiss, but she was used to Riley kissing her on the cheek in greeting and didn't think anything of it. If anything, she'd found it secretly pleasant.

"Where do you think he is?" she replied with a little sigh.

"The office again?" Riley seemed surprised. "It's Saturday night!"

She'd shrugged it off as if she could care less, but she also felt a little guilty for not pushing harder for Luke to come along. Sarah did love him, but she was hurt by so many thoughts…least of all the suspicions she now had about him seeing another woman. Not that she could blame him, really. She had a hard time now responding when he made love to her. She didn't feel very attractive anymore, or loved, and it affected every reaction she had to him. He deserved better than that. She knew it, but couldn't seem to help herself from acting this way.

Sarah pushed such thoughts aside and danced the night away with Riley and Bree-Anne and a few other friends who made a late night appearance. She lost count of the number of drinks she'd had, and by the time Bree-Anne came over with some hunk she'd picked up at the bar to say she was leaving, Sarah realized she could not possibly drive home right now. "I should call Luke," she said, reaching for her purse to locate her cell phone.

"Hey, don't bother him," Riley said, pulling her close and leaning his head down toward hers so he wouldn't have to shout over the music. "I've only had one drink tonight. I can give you a lift, and Luke can bring you back for your car tomorrow."

Oh, how stupid she had been. Sarah closed her eyes and shook her head in self disgust now, remembering how she'd eagerly accepted the offer, not realizing that Riley had probably drank so little on purpose. After all, he needed to have his wits about him in order to pull off the perfect seduction.

It had been pouring rain when they left, another nail in Sarah's coffin. She had been the one to suggest to Riley that, rather than get on the freeway just yet in such bad weather, he could stay at their place and sit for a while until it stopped. Luke hadn't made it home yet either, and a quick call to his cell confirmed that he was going to wait out the storm at the office.

Riley had turned on the television to monitor the weather while she talked to Luke. "Tell Luke it's a slow-moving storm. It'll be outta here in about an hour," he'd called.

She relayed the message and Luke had only responded, "Tell Riley not to leave until it stops. If need be, he can sleep in the guest room tonight."

"Be careful, honey," she'd said, slurring a little, and Luke had told her, "Get to bed, sweetheart. Sounds like you've had one too many drinks tonight. Riley can watch TV until I get there."

She told Riley what Luke had said, but added, "I'm actually starving. Would you like a snack before I go to bed?"

"Yeah, sounds great."

Stupid, stupid, stupid! Sarah would never forgive herself for not realizing the compromising position she was getting herself in, especially when she returned from the kitchen with some finger sandwiches and sat close to Riley on the sofa. He was so witty, so charming, he'd easily drawn her into useless chit chat while they munched on the food. She'd even made the comparison when her glance had strayed to a picture of Luke that Riley was a much better looking man than her husband. Luke was handsome in a clean-cut All-American way, sure, but Riley was just plain gorgeous. He had the face of a model and the body to match. She felt a little flattered that he was spending so much time with her when he could easily be spending time with any woman of his choice.

Eventually he'd inserted into the conversation such comments as "You know, Luke is such a lucky guy to have a wife like you" and "You're so easy to talk to. I could spend hours just sitting here, staring into your beautiful blue eyes." She'd been flattered, and felt a tug of…something, even though she'd known she shouldn't.

Somehow, when Riley had leaned forward to kiss her, she'd let it happen. It had been such a sweet kiss, nothing dirty or elicit about it. It had made her feel alive again, in a way she hadn't in months.

When he'd touched her, just a testing kind of touch, Sarah hadn't pulled away. At some point, she did say, "We shouldn't be doing this," but it was half-hearted protest at best. When he'd begun to undress her, she'd hesitated for a few seconds before trying to stop him. Again, it had been a half-hearted attempt, one he'd easily dismissed when he slid his hand between her legs and began to finger her to orgasm.

Drunk, lonely, needy, she'd allowed him to seduce her in her own home. She'd barely been aware of what was happening by the time she felt his naked body slide over hers on the couch, and his hard shaft – about the same size as Luke's, if not smaller, she remembered – began pushing inside her. She'd tensed then; she'd had the most horrible sensation sweep over her that she was doing something unforgivable. But then he'd been inside her, kissing her softly and murmuring words of encouragement in her ear. For the first time in a long time, Sarah had felt herself begin to respond. Deep down, she'd known it was due to the forbidden thrill of sleeping with a man she wasn't supposed to. Riley had been a slow lover, making sure she had an orgasm before he allowed himself to have his. When it had been over, he'd looked as dazed as she'd felt.

"I didn't know," he'd whispered, pushing her damp hair away from her face. "I didn't realize it would be that good."

Oh, sure, Sarah had found pleasure…for about five minutes. But then, even drunk, she'd begun to realize what she'd done. A horrified look had come over her face as she'd suddenly tried to push him off her.

"This is wrong," she'd told him. "Please…get off me!"

"Sarah, what's wrong?" he'd asked like an idiot. "It was good. I know it was good. Why--?"

Dragging her clothes back on, she'd been unable to look him in the eyes as she told Riley, "I think you should leave now."

"But the weather—"

"Please!" she'd begged, and when she'd looked at him so pitifully, with tears ruining the mascara on her eyes and staining her face with her shame, he'd clenched his jaw and began to dress himself.

Without waiting for him to leave, she'd cried herself to the bedroom she shared with her husband. She wanted a shower, knew she needed one to hide her betrayal, but instead she found herself curled up in a ball in the middle of their bed.

That's how Luke had found her when he'd finally gotten home.

***

Swallowing hard against the lump in his throat, Luke was having a hard time taking in the story Sarah was telling him. He'd hoped it would help the memories come back to him, but he didn't think he wanted these memories.

"So that's why we separated?" he asked thickly. "Because you slept with my best friend."

Sarah shook her head, looking suddenly very angry. "He wasn't your best friend. He was a liar and a snake." Taking a deep breath, she added, "But I take full responsibility for what I did. If I hadn't been so stubborn, so stupid, it would have never happened. I should have listened to you, not them. I should have gotten help after we lost Amelia. God, I was such a fool."

Luke shook his head, feeling dazed and confused. Yes, he was angry, but it almost felt as if he were an outsider, watching a movie about someone else. He didn't like knowing that she'd cheated on him at some point, but as long as it hadn't been an on-going affair, he could forgive her for it. He found it hard to believe, if he'd been the type of man Sarah had led him to believe he'd been, that he hadn't been able to do the same back then.

He pointed this out to her, along with the fact that they'd had Jack. Then an unpleasant thought occurred to him. Sarah had slept with another man. Was Jack even his?

Sarah looked at him, smiling a little for the first time since she'd begun her story. "That's the thing. You had a hard time with it, but you were willing to work things out. You seemed to understand that I hadn't been in my right mind at the time. You insisted that we get counseling together or you were going to leave me, and it really helped. Talking to you again really helped me."

She went on to explain. After a period of mistrust and hurt, things began to get back on track. Luke had suggested during their counseling sessions that he wanted out of the firm, if just so he didn't have to see Riley every day. The other man had begun to show his true colors. In the days following their one night stand, Riley had begun calling Sarah, wanting to make it an ongoing affair. He'd claimed he was falling in love with her. When she'd refused, he'd begun taunting Luke with the fact he'd bedded Luke's wife. He'd even told Luke that he would win Sarah over eventually, so Luke might as well give up and divorce her while he still had some pride left. The situation had gotten so bad, Luke had even talked to one of the senior partners about Riley's taunts. He'd found no sympathy there at all, he'd told Sarah, especially since Riley's grandfather had founded the firm and still held a great deal of influence over the remaining partners.

Seeing that he had no real friends to turn to, Luke had talked about the possibility of a complete career change, although he hadn't been at all certain what he could land a job at. "I feel like a damn vampire in this profession. Who am I really helping anyway?" he'd vented during one session.

Luke and Sarah agreed to get away on vacation as a sort of second honeymoon, hoping to recapture the intimacy she'd shattered with her one-night stand. Luke had been patient and understanding, giving her time to forgive herself while he struggled with his own demons. They'd made love for the first time since her adultery. They'd spent countless hours talking and trying to repair their relationship.

"When we came home, I thought things were looking up," she'd said. "We put the condo up for sale and were planning to move to a house. Then one day, you just didn't come home. I thought something had happened to you."

Sarah had kept herself together long enough to file a missing persons report when enough time had passed, and not even a day later, she had gotten the call. It was Luke, calling to tell her he wasn't coming back. He'd thought things through and realized they were better off getting a divorce, he'd said. "I'll get another lawyer to draw up some papers. You should call Dan Harvey at Holderman's firm. He's a good guy and will be able to represent you fairly."

When he'd wished her well in a calm, unaffected voice, she'd begged to know why. Why was he doing this? Why now? His only answer had been a cryptic, "You know why. I may be a lot of things, but I'm not a fool. Goodbye Sarah."

***

It was hard to remember what she'd gone through in the months following that phone call, Sarah thought to herself now. She hadn't blamed Luke for leaving her. A part of her had been expecting it since she'd lost the baby, even before her indiscretion with Riley. A large part of her still felt she had deserved it, even now.

Because of that, she hadn't even tried to find Luke at first. She'd called Dan Harvey and asked him to represent her in the divorce, making it clear she didn't want anything from Luke that he didn't want to give. She'd waited a few weeks for the papers to arrive, but nothing had happened. Dan had finally asked Sarah if she wanted to start the divorce proceedings herself, but she'd firmly replied, "No. Let's see what Luke does first, OK?"

What Luke had done was close their joint bank account and transfer a nice chunk of the money into one just for her. He'd made sure she still had her own savings and had given her the money they'd earned from the sale of the condo. When she'd found that out, Sarah had tried to call him on his cell phone, only to find it was no longer in service. Since she'd had no idea where to go, she'd packed her stuff and rented a small apartment, making sure she kept their old phone number in case Luke tried to contact her. She'd wondered what to do with his things since he hadn't made an effort to pick them up. She had notified Dan and had those things put in storage for when he did.

Instead of hearing from Luke, she'd heard from Riley, who had continued to harass her with phone calls. On one message he'd left, Riley had informed her that Luke had mailed in his resignation and left the firm. "It's just a matter of time until the divorce is complete," he'd feigned sympathy. "Luke doesn't know what he's giving up. Just remember, if you ever need someone to talk to, I'll be here."

Bastard.

Sarah had finally had to talk to Dan about the possibility of getting a restraining order against the other man when Riley had turned up at her apartment one night and tried to force his way inside. Fortunately, one of her neighbors had come to her aid and threatened to call the police if Riley didn't leave. She remembered Dan's response to that news all too well.

"Honestly, Sarah. I've known Riley for years, almost as long as I've known Luke. He's a bit of a playboy, so I have a hard time seeing him fixated on one woman. Are you sure you just aren't misunderstanding the situation?" Dan had said. "He was Luke's friend. He's probably just trying to make sure you're getting along OK."

Damn, she had thought, realizing she was getting no sympathy from him and too ashamed to tell him that Riley was the reason Luke had left her. She'd decided then and there to relieve him of his services. When Luke's lawyer finally contacted her, she would just see about getting other representation, she had decided. Someone far removed from the situation and who would be on her side.

Almost a month after Luke had left her, Sarah was in real funk. She was losing weight and generally felt like hell. She had a hard time concentrating at school and knew she wasn't helping her students one bit. She considered quitting, moving back in with her parents if they'd have her, and at the worst times, she considered killing herself. She might have done it, too, if it hadn't been for fate stepping in and giving her a reason to live again.

She came down with what she thought was a bug she couldn't seem to shake until the doctor had told her, "Congratulations, Sarah. You're going to have a baby in about six months, I'd guess."

A baby.

She could hardly believe it! She had been on the pill ever since she'd lost Amelia and hadn't given a single thought to the idea that she might have conceived again. At first she had been scared and apprehensive. What if she lost this baby too? A part of her had worried that Riley could have been the father. The dates the doctor had given made it a slight possibility. She'd been on the pill though. The father was Luke. She believed that in her heart – believed it so much she was able to ignore any doubts to the contrary.

That's when she had realized that while she no longer had Luke, she at least had a part of him she would always be able to love, something that would bind them forever. She'd felt her first spark of hope in months! Once she told Luke this news, he might be willing to give her another chance!

Finding Luke by that point had been like finding a needle in a haystack. It had taken most of her savings to hire a private investigator. All the man had been able to find out was that Luke had withdrawn $20,000 cash out of his bank account and purchased an airline ticket to Austin, Texas a few days after his last phone call to Sarah. Beyond that, there was no trace of him. He hadn't used his credit cards. He hadn't signed up for a new phone number anywhere. His email account wasn't even being checked. It was as if he'd simply vanished from the face of the planet.

With Riley's attention becoming more threatening, Sarah now had two people to consider. As much as she hated doing so because Luke wouldn't know how to find her, she had decided to leave Atlanta and go somewhere Riley couldn't find her either. Somewhere she could start fresh and build a secure home for her child. She couldn't afford to move too far, not yet. That's when she had found this house in this small town, near a school she would love teaching at. But Sarah wasn't stupid. She knew all Riley would have to do to find her was to use the resources at his disposal. She worried he could easily find her name on the deed of her new house if he searched public records.

She had contacted her parents, told them she was pregnant, that she was being harassed, and had begged her father to put his name on the deed and utility bills instead. "I swear I have the money. All you have to do is loan me your name. Please?"

Amazingly, her father had agreed with little fuss. When her mother had found out Sarah was alone and pregnant, a change had come over both her parents. They might have been lousy as parents, but they didn't seem to mind being grandparents, especially once they found out Sarah was expecting a boy. Having them show some interest in her again had eased some of Sarah's loneliness, but not her loneliness without Luke.

Sarah had feared Luke wouldn't know how to contact her if he ever came looking, but she couldn't trust anyone, not even Dan apparently, with her new address. Still, she had tried in her own ways to find him…to let him know where she was.