Three Square Meals Ch. 070

John stared at the image in shock, and blurted out, "They found a Progenitor ship!"

Dana groaned, rubbing at her temples, and said, "Crap! It's that feeling again." When John rose to his feet with a look of concern on his face, she waved him away, and said, "It doesn't hurt, it's just really fucking annoying. Go ahead, Calara."

The Latina waited for him to sit down, and once John was seated and focused on her again, she said quietly, "As you can clearly see, the ship has taken massive damage."

She nodded to Faye, and the clearest image expanded, showing enormous gouges in the hull of the crippled vessel. The front half was completely missing, although the ship had crashed into the surface of the planet and was tilted at an awkward angle, so it was possible it could have been buried below ground.

"These pictures were taken by her crew when they rescued Jessica," Calara explained. "The animals and plant life on Arcadia were harmless, almost as if it had been terraformed into a perfect paradise with Terrans in mind. Or more specifically, Progenitors in this case. Arcadia was deemed benign after their first week there, and the crew of the Cora split up to pursue their own research. It was your mother that discovered the ship."

"My father's ship," John said, in a hushed voice. Almost afraid to know the answer, he added, "So, what happened then?"

Calara looked at him apprehensively, and replied, "From what I've been able to piece together from the Captain's logs, your mother went missing, and stopped sending her status reports. The crew eventually tracked down the subdermal homing beacon that they'd all been implanted with, but she'd cut it from her body, and left it hundreds of miles from the Progenitor ship.

"After weeks of fruitless searches, they gave her up for dead, but decided to stay on Arcadia to continue their research. A couple of months later, they discovered the Progenitor ship by accident, and spotted Jessica out foraging nearby. When they tried to bring her back to the Cora, she fought with them, and they had to sedate her. The ship's medical officer performed a full-body scan while Jessica was sedated and discovered she was pregnant."

"With me..." John said quietly.

Calara nodded, and said, "Exactly. When Jessica awoke, she begged them to let her return to Arcadia, desperate to return to her 'Master'. Captain Ebner panicked, not wanting to confront a potentially hostile, technically advanced alien lifeform, and decided to return to Terran Space with all haste. They couldn't put Jessica in cryostasis now that she was pregnant, so they kept her in the brig on the journey home.

"She was heavily pregnant by the time they returned to Olympus Shipyard, and gave birth shortly after they arrived. You were examined by medical personnel and deemed to not be a threat, appearing essentially identical to a normal Terran baby apart from your ears, and your other... enhancements."

John leaned forward, his expression tense as he asked, "So what happened to her then? Where did my mother go?"

Calara sighed, and looked forlorn as she replied, "According to Incident Advisory Board findings, she sabotaged the Cora while her former shipmates were unloading the specimens they'd brought back for study. The survey vessel then exploded, killing all aboard. She stole a corvette undergoing a refit in drydock, and then escaped before anyone realised what she'd done. The corvette was tracked heading towards the eastern frontier, before contact was lost."

Alyssa squeezed his hand, and said, "Your grandparents demanded that you be relinquished to their care, and they became your legal guardians. You already know the rest: your mother was declared legally dead, and your grandparents took care of you."

John slumped back in his seat, shell-shocked by the revelations. Calara had just confirmed something he'd always refused to believe before; that Jessica Blake had been responsible for the accident that had killed her shipmates. Not only that, but Calara had also confirmed something else he'd always hoped wasn't the case. That his mother had abandoned him on a whim.

He rose from his chair, and said quietly, "Thank you. It's good to finally know the truth after all these years." Turning then, he walked towards the door.

"John, wait!" Alyssa called to him, rising from her chair.

He paused, glancing at her over his shoulder, as he replied, "I'll be in my Ready Room. I'd like some time alone, please."

The girls looked at him with sympathy as Alyssa slowly sank back in her chair.

John walked through the Bridge, feeling numb. Faye watched quietly, but didn't interrupt him, as he walked around the Command Podium and entered his Ready Room. Slumping in his leather chair, he turned it so that he was staring out of the big window that flanked the room, gazing bleakly at the stars. They had always provided him comfort in the past, thinking that somewhere out there, were the answers to his mother's disappearance, and perhaps Jessica Blake herself. Now he had as many answers as he could stomach, and he wasn't sure he wanted to find his mother any more.

He felt hollow inside, raw feelings of loss and abandonment raked up again after decades of suppressing them. Rationally, he knew his mother had been enthralled by his father, but sometimes logic and reason couldn't soothe an emotional response. He knew the compulsion to obey him had been overwhelming in the girls, at least until he'd broken it, but the thought of any of them willingly committing cold-blooded murder was galling.

Edraele and Alyssa obeyed his request, remaining silent, and leaving him alone with his thoughts. Partly it was through respect for his wishes, but also because they could tell that in his current mood, he'd simply block them out if they interrupted him. He lost track of time as he stared disconsolately out of the window, until a soft tapping at the door roused him from his melancholic thoughts.

"Come in," he said brusquely.

John was expecting it to be Alyssa that walked through the door, and he was surprised that she'd interrupt him after he'd requested some time alone. He was startled to see that it was Irillith who glided through the doorway, and approached him warily.

She stopped in front of his desk, and said in a soft voice, "I wanted to speak with you, if that's alright?"

He studied Irillith for a moment, and was surprised to see there was something else troubling her behind her look of sympathy. His concern for her overrode his own bleak mood, and he rose from his chair and walked around the desk to meet her.

"What's wrong?" he asked, reaching out to stroke her blue arm supportively.

She met his gaze, but she faltered for a moment and sounded sad as she replied, "I've seen that look on your face before."

John looked at her in confusion, and asked, "How could you? I've never felt this way around you."

Shaking her head, she looked away, and replied, "Not on you, on Tashana, when I told her that our mother had killed our father. She didn't believe me at first, but I made her understand..."

"Understand what?" John asked,

"That our mother was a monster," she explained, with a heavy sigh.

He could feel the surge of grief and remorse over his bond with Edraele, and he said to her sternly, *That wasn't you, so don't start feeling guilty for something you didn't do.*

She recovered quickly, and for once, he was glad of the compulsion to obey him. Edraele sounded determined as she replied, *I might not be responsible, but I am in a unique position to make it up to Tashana, and Irillith too.*

John turned his attention back to Irillith, and said sympathetically, "Edraele isn't that person any more. I know it's not the same as if your real mother had suddenly undergone a damascene conversion, but she's trying to make amends in the best way she can."

Irillith smiled at him then, and stepped closer, looking into his eyes as she said, "I didn't disturb you looking for sympathy, I promise. I was just trying to tell you that I understand, and that I'm here for you if you want to talk about it."

He wrapped her in his arms, feeling her soft white hair against his cheek as she leant into him. "Thank you, that was very thoughtful," he told her, holding her close.

"You're always trying to help us, but you should lean on us a bit, let us help you too," she murmured in his ear, nuzzling against him.

They stood like that for a while, both drawing comfort from each other. Eventually, they pulled apart a little, and Irillith gave him a shy smile, unused to those kind of emotions. He brushed his finger over her cheek, staring into her violet eyes, and said, "It feels strange being the one needing some support. I think we'll just keep to the status quo, if that's alright with you?"

She smiled at him, and asked, "Ever the alpha male?"

"Absolutely!" he replied gruffly, and they both laughed, feeling better for it. He smiled at her, and added, "Now, let's talk about something far more important. We'll arrive at the Underworld tomorrow afternoon, right?"

Irillith nodded, and said firmly, "That's right, and according to the tracking implant, that's where we'll find my sister. I can finally start to make things up to her after all these years."

"I'll help you find her, don't worry," he said, stroking her back in a soothing gesture.

Turning to look out the window, Irillith sighed, and wondered out loud, "I wonder what Tashana's doing right now?"

Leaning against him again, she drew strength from his comforting embrace, watching the stars as John held her protectively.