To Love a Stray Ch. 05

"You can't do that!" Wade roars as he rushes to grab the bottle from me, I come off the bed after him barely managing not to shift as I grab hold of the bottle in his hand.

"Do not think you can tell me how to look after MY toms!" I snarl aggressively "Interfere again and I will rip your arm off!" I growl as I eye the large Alpha.

"You are not giving my son any water with his stomach ripped open like that!" Wade roars back at me and I feel shivers of fear but I stand my ground and begin to snarl.

"I ... can ... not ... smell ... any ... intestinal ... damage," I say each word carefully as I become aware of the other toms moving to back their Alpha, "Alex needs fluids or blood loss and shock WILL kill him." I turn my back on Wade and climb back onto the bed trying not to jostle Alex.

"Are you sure about...?" Wade begins.

"Of course I'm fucking sure! I won't take the chance with the life of one of MY toms," I snarl staking my ownership of Alex defiantly.

"Don't swear in front of an Alpha Stray," I hear Malcolm admonish harshly.

I turn my attention to dribbling several more drops onto Alex's lips and I am rewarded when he manages to swallow them.

"Doc is only about ten minutes away," I hear someone say but take no notice of who the strange voice belongs to. The wait for Doc to arrive is torture for me although I believe that at the moment Alex is beyond the point of pain, my body protests the unusual position I have taken but I am scared to move and possibly cause Alex pain.

"Doc's here. He's just seeing to the others first so he won't be distracted when he tries to help Alex," Micah says softly near my ear and I nod silently as I lay watching Alex breathing shallowly. I dribble a little more water between his lips and I am sure his swallow is stronger as he swallows the fluids. It seems like an eternity before I smell Doc as he enters the room and checks Dwayne's injuries.

"You're giving him water Rosy?" Doc asks slightly disapprovingly.

"I can't smell perforated intestines or bowel or bladder," I say tightly.

"Have you had a look at the wounds?" Doc asks.

"No because I didn't want to chance starting any bleeding," I say and rest my forehead on the bed in front of my face.

"Good thinking," Doc praises lightly as he moves to stand beside the bed near Alex, "I hear you're claiming Alex is yours," he says with the slightest hint of a question to his tone.

"The four of them are my clan or I'm theirs," I say and my confusion with the concept comes out in my voice.

"Can I try to help Alex now?" Doc asks softly.

"Please," I beg and feel the tears well up in my eyes. I bury my face in the bed once again and listen as Doc begins working, he talks softly to someone and I realise Marissa is there. I lay there holding Alex's hand in my good one, flinching internally with each little spasm of his fingers while I lay with my face turned towards him but my eyes closed so I don't have to see the horror of his injuries.

"...Rosy ... sleeping?" I hear the faint words from Alex and realise he must be looking at me.

"Yeah, she insisted on resting on your bed." I hear Mitchell say quietly. I listen intently but there is no more talk only the sounds of Doc putting in sutures.

"She's the best medicine he can get at the moment," Doc whispers and I open my eyes, he glances my way and gives me a tense smile. "Someone offer Rosy a drink would you?" Doc asks in a whisper.

"Here," Micah says and a straw is held to my lips. I drink thirstily before moving my head slightly, my entire body aches but I refuse to move.

"How long?" I whisper.

"Doc's been sewing for nearly two hours," Marissa tells me and I make the smallest movement with my head.

"How...?" I ask but can't finish the question.

"How bad? Bad but repairable if infection doesn't set in," Doc says tightly. I fall silent again as I lay there with Alex not moving while Doc works on him, all I can do is be here and hold his hand hoping I can tie him to this life.

"Ok, that's the last stitch." Doc murmurs some time later, "The injection I gave him should make him sleep until morning and I'll give him another injection then,"

"Doc. Can I see you out in the kitchen?" Wade asks.

"Sure. A cup of coffee would be most welcome," Doc replies. I lay beside Alex silently as most everyone leaves the room until only Dwayne, Marissa and myself remain with Alex.

"I'll watch Alex while you go and eat Rosy. You need to look after yourself because of the babies," Marissa says gently.

"I'm not hungry," I say tightly. The thick smell of blood along with the familiar scent left by those who attacked the toms has sickened me to my stomach. I am not aware of how long I stay with Alex before Mitchell comes in to look down at us.

"Rosy, you have to go and eat. Alex will get upset if he finds out you stayed with him instead of looked after yourself," Mitchell chides gently. I detect a strained note in his voice and know he is as worried about Alex as I am, I ease off the bed reluctantly but I know Mitchell is right.

"I'll be back as soon as I finish eating," I promise and head for the kitchen. I pause uneasily in the doorway of the kitchen, there are four strangers standing around with various alcoholic drinks as well as Wade who is talking to Doc as well as Micah and Malcolm. Knowing I will be safe with Micah and Malcolm present I walk into the room careful to head towards the side of the room away from the strangers.

I have no chance to scream as I am grabbed from behind and both my arms are forced up behind my back, agony shoots through my injured wrist and I find myself on my knees on the floor. A heavy hand forces my head down until my chin touches my chest and I am staring at the floor, I can smell Edwin's scent and realise it is he who has hold of me.

"You disappoint me Rosy," Wade says sadly, "Here I was thinking you were smart but just very scared and you had to go and pull a stunt like that," I watch silently as his shoes come into my line of vision and I listen to him clicking his tongue in disappointment.

"You just had to go and threaten me didn't you? And I seen in your eyes you meant every word and were willing to back it up. Well now we start playing by my rules. You start toeing the line or I will order you taken out to the middle of no-man's land and dropped off with nothing but the clothes on your back. And if that happens you will NOT be allowed back on my land," Wade states in a hard voice, "Understand?"

I make no reply and the pressure increases on my arms making me cry out in pain.

"First off you start learning to get on with my warriors, all of them. You do not play favourites. You may spend time with those who are injured but you will not be sleeping in Mitchell and Sam's room, nor will you be sleeping in the room with Dwayne and Alex. I will not have you in a closed room with any toms that may not be able to defend themselves against you if you shift in a time of stress. Now I have been told you don't sleep well on your own and wake screaming several times a night disturbing everyone. So you will sleep in Steven and Micah's room, both of them should be old enough, mature enough and experienced enough to be able to ensure their own safety if you should shift," Wade tells me in a hard voice, "Do you understand?"

When I make no reply more pressure is applied to my arms and I scream with the pain, it takes my breath away and I can't reply to him. Most of the pressure is released on my arms until I sob with relief and draw gasping breathes.

"Are you going to abide by my rules or do I arrange for you to be driven out to no-man's land tonight?" Wade demands angrily. "You will only be required to sleep in the same room as Steven and Micah; I am not ordering you to take one of them as a mate. Do you agree with my orders or not?"

I try to raise my head but the hand on the back of my head keeps me bowed in front of Wade.

"Yes," I say after I see his shoes move impatiently, "Yes I'll abide by your orders,"

"Let her go," Wade says after a minute, the hand is lifted from behind my head and my arms are released. I gasp and cradle my injured wrist across my chest; I make no effort to get to my feet as I try to ease the pain throbbing in my arm.

"Now get up off the floor and have something to eat, you need to look after yourself." Wade orders. I stumble to my feet and glance at him nervously before heading for the fridge.

"I'll bandage that arm first Wade," Doc says firmly.

"Of course," Wade agrees and guides me to a chair. I sit down without a word, the pain in my arm preventing me from protesting. Doc's touch is gently as he examines my wrist but I still have to swallow a groan of pain as he tests the mobility of my wrist, he glances at me as if he knows how much it hurts but I refuse to meet his eyes as I keep my gaze focused on my arm.

"I'll just bandage that up securely and it should ease most of the pain but I can't guarantee that there was no damage done to the healing process just now," Doc tells Wade in a tone of censor.

"Other than your arm how are you? No aches and pains? Any nausea?" Doc asks.

"My back aches faintly every now and then and I feel nauseous most of the time but it's generally not too bad," I mutter quietly.

"Sounds about normal but I'll keep a watch on you in any case," Doc tells me gently. I sit patiently while Doc wraps a bandage around my wrist, a plate of food is put in front of me and I begin eating even while Doc is working on my arm. I only eat half the food before I stop with an unsettled stomach and I push the plate away from me.

"Can I go back to Alex now?" I ask tightly.

"You haven't finished your meal. I will not have you neglecting yourself," Wade says sternly. I am about to refuse to finish eating when I decide to eat even though I know what the outcome will probably be. So much for Wade Williamson's orders I figure. I am nearly finished when I feel the first warning roll of my stomach, I swallow hard but the horrible feeling intensifies. I am up and out of the chair racing for the toilet in the next instant as I feel my stomach rebel and I barely make it to the toilet before my food comes hurtling back.

"I am giving you something for that nausea," I hear Doc say but I am too sick to do more then dry retch again. I barely notice Doc give me an injection and it takes some time before I am able to stop clinging to the toilet bowl and retching. I make no complaint as someone picks me up and cradles me against their chest as they carry me out of the toilet room. The sheet is blessedly cool beneath my cheek and I make no objections as I am put to bed in a bed that smells of Micah.

"I hope I made the right decision," I hear Wade mutter and wonder why I can still hear and understand them even though I know I am asleep.

"I hope so too because if not there's a real chance it will send her crazy. She might not be able to adjust to life in a clan because she has been on her own for so long. You notice how she tends to run off by herself when things go wrong?" Doc asks and he gives a deep sigh, "I don't know of anything to help her either,"

"Rosy needs time, everyone's asking too much too fast of her," Mitchell says and I can hear the distress in his voice.

"I got a few things to do before I go to bed why don't you keep her company until then but when I come in you get out," there is a hard tone to Micah's voice and an underlying growl.

"Rosy would appreciate it if she knew," Mitchell tells him and I feel the bed move ever so slightly before there is slight pressure against my back and warmth begins to reach me.

"Wouldn't it be more comforting for her if you were in the bed not on top of the covers?" Doc asks.

"No, Rosy won't allow that close of contact," Mitchell says quietly near me and I feel him begin to stroke my hair. It becomes quiet except for Mitchell's breathing and I wonder if the others are still there, I listen to him as he whispers to me. I realise he is trying to tell me something but my mind begins to sink deeper into sleep and I fight it as I try to listen to him. I must have moved or made some sound because he starts talking soothingly telling me I'm safe and it is with these words and the sound of his voice I drift into sleep.

* * * * *

It is mid morning before I wake the next day, I had woken when Mitchell left me the previous night and Micah took his place. I had stayed awake crying for a long time and had cried myself to exhaustion and still had not been able to sleep until the sky had begun to lighten with the first hints of dawn. I sit up but my head feels thick and heavy from the lack of sleep and too many tears. The building seems too quiet somehow and then I remember my four toms returning ... their injuries ... I get out of bed hurriedly and sit back down as the room spins.

When my dizziness passes I head out to see how my toms are. I find Sam, Mitchell and Dwayne all in the lounge room with Sam on the lounge and the other two in chairs. All three appear to be asleep and I stand watching them for a long time just to make sure they are all breathing. I turn around and head for the room I know Alex is in and pause in the doorway, Marissa sits by his bed watching him anxiously, his face is so pale it is almost grey and his chest is only moving very faintly.

"How is he?" I ask as I walk into the room silently. I take the chair across the bed from Marissa and check the wet cloth on his forehead, it is warm and I rinse it out in a dish of water before replacing it on his forehead.

"He comes around now and then but he's not very lucid. Doc says the next forty-eight hours will tell if infection will set in," Marissa says quietly. I notice the dark shadows beneath her eyes and know she hasn't slept all night, I don't blame her the only reason I had left the night before was because I had been all but ordered to eat and then Wade had taken a stand over what I had said to him.

"Have you eaten today Rosy?" Marissa asks.

"Not yet, I feel pretty off in the stomach." I say faintly.

"Rosy. You have to take care of yourself, if Wade thinks you aren't he will ban you from the room." Marissa warns, "Now go and eat. The babies need you to keep healthy; Alex needs you to be well for him."

I leave the room reluctantly and head to the kitchen to make myself breakfast. Scrambled eggs are easy and quick so I settle for them. I am putting them on a plate when Doc, Wade, Micah and Edwin head through to the bedrooms. I eat and go sit by Mitchell's chair not wanting to be in the same room as Wade, I sit with my head leaning against the arm of his chair and find myself beginning to fall asleep.

I wake with a start and push myself upright groggily, I can't identify the noise I am hearing and get to my feet hurriedly. I follow it along the long sunroom to the door of Alex and Dwayne's room where I halt in the doorway as I look in. Marissa is crying brokenly while Wade holds her and both Micah and Edwin have a hand over their eyes, their shoulders shaking.

Sam is propped against the second bed his entire body trembling while Dwayne lays across the bed with his face buried in a pillow screaming in pain, Mitchell sits on the floor by Alex's head with his head bowed and his shoulders shaking. I look at Alex but there is something wrong, I can't work out what it is and I walk into the room looking at him. Suddenly I realise his chest isn't moving, he isn't breathing and when I look at his face in horror I realise something in him has been extinguished ... Alex is dead.

My cry of horror turns into a scream of pain as I shift uncontrollably, agony shoots through my injured foreleg and I scream in pain as I whirl and run on three legs. I skid around corners as I race for the back door bruising my hips on sharp corners of doorways as I slide out of control, I shred the insect screen on the door with both front legs and cry out in pain as I stumble on landing outside. I turn and head for the tree line taking my weight on all four legs regardless of the pain lancing through the injured leg. I reach my fastest speed before I reach the tree line and career into the trees unmindful of under growth in my path.

When I fall I get up and continue on until I fall again only to rise again, I keep on until my lungs burn for oxygen and my leg can't bear my weight. Finally I stumble to a halt and fall onto my side, my sides heaving as I gasp for air. The pain in my body is no match for the pain in my heart knowing Alex has died. But no tears come, cats can't cry.

This was not supposed to have happened! Clan cats kill strays! Strays do not kill warriors! When I change back to human form I roll onto my back and stare up through the tree branches to the sky above. The tears denied to me in cat form roll down my cheeks and I tremble softly. My stomach clenches and I roll over to vomit up my breakfast, I crawl away too weak and spent to get to my feet. I stay where I lay until the evening shadows begin to lengthen before I look for a deadfall to hide in. I lay awake all night staring into the darkness feeling nothing but a deep emptiness, just before dawn I shift and hobble off looking for water. I find a small stream and drink my fill but I have no interest in the mice I hear scurrying or either of the rabbits that bound away at my approach.

I wander aimlessly all day without eating and find myself heading back towards the compound as the evening starts to turn to dusk. Night finds me curled up by the stream where I had watched Edwin, Sam and Donovan from the tree branches. During the hour before dawn I get up and begin the walk back to the buildings, my progress is slow as I hop along on three feet and when I finally reach the clearing and limp out from the trees my head hangs low and my tail drags on the ground behind me.

I barely make it a quarter of the way to the buildings before I am surrounded by toms in cat form, Micah walks around me sniffing and noses me gently trying to get me to look at him. The others hang back whining and even Mitchell sniffs my way uneasily. I turn away from the others and try to break into a trot but I go down in a heap when my front leg refuses to hold my weight. I growl uneasily as I lay still for several moments before getting to my feet again and making my way forward on three legs slowly.

One cat races off ahead while the others move in wide arcs behind me calling to me but I ignore them as I head for the quarters. The back door is ruined and I walk through it awkwardly on my way through the house, when I come to the room Alex had been in I make my way to the bed where I last saw him and cry plaintively before sniffing the bed. I can smell him, can smell his blood but most alarmingly I can detect a hint of ... nothingness in his scent. I lift my chin and give a long series of coughing calls, each one more lonely and lost sounding than the last, I cry out my pain in cat form as I look at the place I last saw his body.

"Rosy, come on shift back. Shift back Rosy, let us comfort you, we loved Alex too," Mitchell begs at my side but I ignore him and his touch as I continue to call until my voice starts to give out. I lay down on my side my front legs stretched out in front of me slightly and I don't even stir when Wade comes into my line of view or when Doc squats to check my injured leg.

"Enough is enough," Doc mutters. A sharp sting in my injured leg catches my attention and I snarl as I realise Doc has slid a needle into a vein, my entire body tenses then pain explodes through me and I scream. I tremble and gasp, my entire body trembling as I realise that I am now human, a blanket is tucked around me then I am lifted into strong arms and carried from the room.

"Where do you want her?" Micah asks.

"Put her in your room," Wade orders and I wish I was a cat so I could snarl my displeasure at him but all I can do is lay in Micah's arms limply.