Trainingware Pt. 08

In the cafeteria, Wendy Yount, a fat sixth year girl with a bad case of acne and a very annoying voice came and sat down opposite me. I'd heard she was sensitive about her acne but couldn't use medicine to clear it up because her parent's religion didn't allow medical treatment for problems that weren't life-threatening. Wendy started talking to me in her shrill voice about how she'd heard I really liked Kim Kraether, the most attractive girl in sixth year. It sounded for a moment like she was taunting me, and her voice was so grating I told her to shut up, and added that her face looked like a pepperoni pizza. Suddenly, Wendy's face screwed up and she looked like she was going to cry!

I'd done it again -- hurt Wendy's feelings! I immediately apologized, said I knew I shouldn't have said that, and Wendy stopped looking like she was going to cry and just got red in the face.

"Just go fuck yourself, OK, David?" And she stood up from the table and walked out of the room.

Shit! Not a very successful apology this time. I wondered if this meant I was going to get eighty slaps in my session with Judy. And I'd brought it on myself! Why the hell couldn't I learn not to insult people?

I studied mental training most of the afternoon and did exercises to recognize the signs of annoyance that tempted me to make put-down remarks. Then I finished the first assignment I had to do for tomorrow, but I still had a lot of reading to do in Humanities before I could make more progress with my second assignment.

Walking to Judy's house Wednesday afternoon, I had a sensitive erection the whole way, even though my butt didn't hurt at all. When I got to her apartment I knew I had to change into the punishment shorts, and I tried to do it stoically. Don't give Judy any more satisfaction than you can help, I thought. But I was scared and flushing with embarrassment again when she walked in.

"Hello, David," Judy said, looking serious. "I already know you're mad at me, and I have a good idea why, so you don't have to beat around the bush. I won't punish you for feeling that way -- I understand your viewpoint, although I think you're distorting a lot of things in your own mind. Do you have anything you want to say before you have your session?"

"Yeah!" I said, feeling a surge of anger. "How is what you're doing to me any different than what your stepfather did to you? You needed a year of deep therapy after that, right? Is what you're doing really supposed to help me, or is it just a way for you to get off? Like it probably was for Caspar to punish you?"

Judy's face looked strained, but she seemed unhappy rather than mad. "I was a helpless fourteen-year-old girl when that started, David, scared to death of what an adult man was doing to me, afraid even to speak to my mother because I thought it was my fault and she'd already agreed that Oscar should punish me." She paused and wiped a tear from her eye. "I don't think you can compare our situations. You're a very tough nut by comparison, yelling at me even though you have a punishment coming right now. Admit it, it isn't the same!"

I mumbled that she was probably right, because I had to admit I was impressed by how emotional she felt about it. I knew I'd never feel that vulnerable when I didn't feel any threat of imminent punishment. But then I thought of something else.

"But you really enjoy whipping me, don't you?" I said. "How do you know you're not punishing me part of the time just for your own enjoyment? And another thing! I went through the whole sensie of your experiences during my session, and you didn't really think of me as a person once, just a sexually aroused boy who was fun to discipline!"

Judy sounded a little more angry now. "I know I'm not punishing you for no reason because I can keep two things in my head at one time, and I've given my Bonded word that I'll put your therapeutic needs first! From what I've learned about this training, it's not supposed to be a problem that I enjoy doing it."

She hesitated a minute, then added, "And maybe I didn't think too much of you as a person when I was whipping you -- I have to put myself in a special frame of mind when I do that, you know -- but I can imagine how solicitous you'd be about my value as a person if you were the one with the punishment wand!"

And then she added, in what sounded like a wistful voice, "Anyway I was thinking about you as a person yesterday when I gave you my diary. I've never let anyone see that before, and I never would have given it to you if I'd realized how unsympathetic you'd be about what I went through as a child!"

She was almost convincing me! I was starting to feel confused until I remembered my determination not to be her lap dog.

"OK, look," I said. "I know you're going to punish me, and I'm determined to try not to lose my dignity. I'd appreciate it if you didn't degrade me like you've been doing, playing with me and humiliating me. If you can just get it over with and let me go on to something else, I can stand it."

Judy looked like she was communing with Hubba for a minute, then said, "OK, David. What did you do bad today? Did you hurt someone's feelings?"

"Yeah, uh, I put down Wendy Yount because she was bugging me. I, uh, said something about her complexion." A horrible thought struck me that I'd just hurt Judy's feelings too, I'd made her cry just now! And I knew I couldn't hold back any details like that, because she'd know I was lying by leaving something out. "And, uh, . . . I hurt your feelings just now . . . Ma'am, when I compared what you were doing to what Caspar did to you."

Judy shook her head, "I'm not going to count it when you hurt my feelings. I know you're under a lot of stress and you think I'm the cause of it all. But Wendy's a different matter!"

I felt Deep O-Mode disorientation, and when I came out of it, Judy was speaking again. "I'm only going to give you sixty slaps for insulting Wendy. You did try to apologize and I know Wendy can be kind of annoying, so I understand how you thought she was taunting you. But next time, wait until you're sure someone's being mean to you before you retaliate!"

I couldn't help but feel that Judy was trying to be as fair as she could. She'd refused to count how I'd hurt her feelings, and I'd expected eighty slaps for what I'd said to Wendy.

Judy looked thoughtful. "Do you think it would be less humiliating if I put you in O-Mode to make you get in the positioner?"

"No!" I answered. "Uh, I prefer to do it myself, Ma'am." And I followed Judy into the punishment room and dropped my shorts just before climbing onto the positioner. I realized I was trembling again, but I'd never expected to be impervious to this.

I got sixty slaps in two whipping rounds that had me bawling like a baby as usual. When it was finished I heard Judy say my punishment was over, and when my restraints snapped away I got up off the positioner with my usual excited sex-surge erection and painfully sore behind, but I didn't hesitate putting on my street clothes. I wasn't going to beg her to get me off this time, not as long as I could stand being celibate.

Judy seemed to read my mind again. "I'm not going to get you off anyway, David, until you stop thinking of me as your enemy. I won't humiliate you, but I'm not in the mood to reward you."

I was kind of scared hearing that. If I didn't have any chance to masturbate for a few nights, I knew how desperate I'd get. But Judy clearly didn't intend to discuss it with me, she just turned and left the room. I saw her again just before I went home, when she handed me a new ADT.

"You have the wrong idea about some of the things that happened in your first session," she said. "I was trying to delete the tutorial interactions from the first sensie I gave you, and I left out some parts that contradict your conclusions. If you want to see my side you'll play this sensie with some of the deleted sections put back in."

I wanted to just throw the ADT in the waste disposal to show Judy what I thought of her self-serving new sensie, but I'd decided I wouldn't try to defy her when I was with her, so I'd just wait until later.

"And don't you dare throw away that ADT," Judy said in an angry voice. "I spent two hours getting it right. If you don't want to play it, fine, but I want you to keep it around in case you change your mind!"

Shit -- she'd read my mind again! I figured that to throw the ADT away now would be disobedient, and I'd get punished, so I had to keep it. But I wasn't ever going to play it. Fuck her!

As I walked home, I figured out how Judy was reading my mind. She could record my sensie and play it back for herself in real-time! That way she'd know everything I was thinking and feeling. That's why she seemed so spaced sometimes, because she had trouble experiencing my thoughts and talking with me at the same time! I was sure she wasn't reading my mind all the time, since it took so much concentration when she tried to talk. But then I started to wonder if she could read my mind when I was at home!

When I got into bed Wednesday night, I was tremendously horny, and I prayed that I'd be able to wake up during the night. I remembered I'd awakened late Monday night when Judy wouldn't get me off, so I had some hope, and I did twenty minutes of mental exercises to make myself wake up at three or four AM.

And it worked! When I woke up, humping against the mattress as usual, it was three-thirty! I put my hand on my cock and started fantasizing, and I was near pre-discipline climax when I had to guess odd or even again. I guessed odd, and the number that I saw come up in the status field was 14, so I knew I was going to get at least twenty slaps tomorrow. I didn't stop stroking off, but I thought hard about my second guess. If I lost this one, I'd get SIXTY slaps tomorrow and I'd be left frustrated tonight!

I guessed even this time, and the number that came up was 62! A minute later I was screaming with release.

The next morning was Thursday, and I got both homeworks in, finishing the afternoon Humanities assignment by the skin of my teeth. By the time I left school to walk to Judy's house, I was horny again. And I suddenly realized I'd forgotten to do my aerobic exercises! I'd been working all through the morning and then Lunch and Free period to finish my homework, and just grabbed a bite to eat from the machines.

When I arrived, Judy was home already, and she didn't have any sympathy with my excuse for why I hadn't exercised. She said I ought to be able to get both things done, and I would have if I hadn't spent all Tuesday evening on the diary and sensie, and all Wednesday afternoon on mental training. But she said I'd only get ten slaps for missing my exercises and twenty for my wrong guess on the hurdle when I was masturbating last night. She seemed to be trying to keep a straight face when she mentioned the hurdle, but I could imagine she was smiling inside, knowing how I felt about getting whipped for what I had to do to stroke off!

I had to strip from my street clothes to get into the positioner, and I only had one round of whipping. But I was still sore from yesterday so I was bawling continuously from an early point, and it took me a while to calm down. I felt the restraints on the positioner snap back, and got up to get dressed. Judy was over by the table, looking receptive if I wanted to say anything to her, but I didn't, and after a few minutes she left.

I was really horny again Thursday night, and I hoped I'd wake up during the night, but it didn't happen. By the time I reached school on Friday I felt like I was going to be forced to ask Judy for her help getting off, but I worked on mental training interactive exercises all through the undemanding class periods, and by the time I went to Judy's house in the afternoon the schoolbrain told me I'd made a breakthrough. I was able to figuratively wrap my erotic desires in a ball and hold it at a distance, just as the interactive exercise trainer said I should.

I didn't have any punishment coming Friday, and Judy said so immediately, then waited, giving me a chance to say something. When I was silent she went into her bedroom to study.

Friday night, my mental exercises weren't enough. I was feeling so aroused I was seriously thinking of phoning Judy and begging her to get me off. I'd do anything she wanted, accept any punishment she named. I was beyond worrying about humiliation at this point, and I was frightened that I wouldn't be able to wake up during the night so I'd be feeling even worse the next morning. I was so aroused that the nipple in my rectum seemed permanently elongated, and the sheath around my cock continually stiff, providing a lot of friction. Whenever my erection would grow or shrink a little, as it did with surprising frequency, it felt like someone was stroking it! I got suspicious and watched for awhile, but I never saw the sheath moving by itself, and I decided that the sensations were just usual reactions to the sexy thoughts I couldn't control properly.

It suddenly struck me that I'd never played the new sensie Judy gave me, and I thought she might make that a condition for getting me off if I phoned her. I decided I could play the sensie and still not change my mind about what I believed, so I got it out and started it. It began with a view that showed three bookmarks to short clips in the sensie, and I activated the first one.

I was Judy again, and it was right after David's first whipping round. A low-grade AI voice that had to be the tutorial was saying that David hadn't reached baby response threshold until the twenty-first whipping stroke. It was supposed to be the fifteenth, and the tutorial recommended I raise the pain intensity of the wand to 83. I considered that, but I didn't want to make things any harder on David right now if I didn't have to. I got the Tutorial to tell me the acceptable range of pain intensity, and learned it was 80 to 85, so I left the wand at 80.

The segment ended, and I realized what I'd just been shown. For the first time, I had real evidence that Judy was trying to go easy on me, keeping the punishment wand at the low end of the pain intensity range recommended. I realized in fact that Judy couldn't bring it any lower than that even if she wanted to, because she had to do what was therapeutically correct. I didn't try to think about that yet, just activated the second bookmark.

I was Judy again. The whipping rounds were over and I was placing the Hubba on David's inner thigh. I watched it for a moment, and then told it to go into Sexual Readiness Mode. Then I heard Hubba speak in its weird voice, using silence like a tone, asking me to supply authorization for discipline training on David Carmody. Hubba was a real AI! No personality, though, since it didn't use the first person pronoun. After Hubba was satisfied, it suggested I use a pulsing contact with David's cock that Hubba would direct, and it could duplicate the sensation whenever it stimulated him. After I did that for awhile, I stepped back from David, and the Hubba took over. I watched David getting more and more excited, with the tentacles doing naughty things to his bottom, until he was almost hysterical with excitement, shrieking and humping galvanically. This went on until I had a sudden thought that it was lasting a long time, so I asked Hubba and it said David was being restrained from reaching orgasm to make the arousal period more effective, and I saw a visual status pad showing David's Arousal rating at NINETY-FIVE!

"Stop it," I said, "Right now! Bring him down from this! It's too hard on him!"

And then I saw the scene I remembered from the first sensie: I saw Hubba's tentacles go still and my Arousal rating dropping from 95 down into the low 80s. Judy watched David (me) shrieking with frustration, and started to talk with me after my arousal got down to 82. She felt sorry for me and worried it was her fault that I was so frustrated, so she tried to be comforting when I was able to talk again.

The second sensie segment ended, and I understood what Judy meant when she said I'd gotten the wrong idea about things that happened in my first session. She wasn't to blame at all that my Arousal rating got up to 95. She was just taking responsibility because she was in charge. It was the AI, trying to be as efficient as possible that had brought my arousal level so high. No AI would harm a human, of course, so the 95 Arousal must be safe for some period, no matter how awful it felt. But Judy had protected me unthinkingly; she'd made it stop because she worried about how hard it was on me to be so aroused. I felt an immense wave of gratitude, and then sudden guilt about being so mean to Judy the last few days. I'd completely misjudged her!

I played the third bookmarked segment. I was in the bathroom and the Hubba was telling Judy some things about the 95 Arousal rating I'd already figured out. At the end Judy told Hubba that the Arousal rating it could use on me when I was being tantalized shouldn't go above 89. Then there was a special footnote that Judy had later told Hubba to raise my Arousal from 89 to 95 during the last few minutes of arousal before ejaculating, but not any other time. That was obviously why my climaxes had been so intense since Judy took control of me; I certainly couldn't blame her for that, considering how much pleasure it gave me when I got off now.

Once I stopped the sensie, I wanted to apologize to Judy right away. I looked at the clock, but of course Judy was always awake when I was, so I immediately tried to phone her. Her phone recognized me, but responded with a "Recipient Not Available" status, and asked if I wanted to leave a message. I decided to try again later. For nearly an hour my thoughts cycled back and forth from how horny I was to how much I'd misjudged Judy. I had a cynical thought that she might still be fooling me with a fake sensie, but I was pretty sure a normal user couldn't doctor a sensie. I used my console to check, and the answer I got was that splicing in later scenes was beyond the current state of the art, even for commercial sensie mediatronics. So I was right: Judy had tried to make things as easy as possible for me all down the line. I was actually lucky to have her in charge of my discipline! I imagined if I had Ms Fechtenbaum, I wouldn't be getting any breaks on how high she set the pain intensity or the Arousal rating she used as punishment.

I kept trying to phone Judy every fifteen minutes until eleven, when I started getting tired. It struck me then that I could go to sleep, and go directly over to Judy's tomorrow morning: Saturday. She'd said I should come over after breakfast, but she was always up when I was, and I could explain I'd found out how I misjudged her, and how sorry I was. Then I could beg her to get me off. Never mind that she enjoyed dominating me while she did it! I ought to be able to accept that, since it was actually a turn-on for me that she felt that way, at least when I wasn't mad at her! And I knew now that she really was my protector, just as I'd thought a few days ago.

After I'd taken off my clothes and gotten into bed, it struck me that if Judy was out, maybe that meant she wasn't watching me in the monitor cameras, and I could stroke off! But I worried she might be home, just not answering the phone, and she might get so mad at me if she caught me trying to stroke off that she'd refuse to get me off again tomorrow! I finally used mental exercises to enter Rest Mode and managed to get to sleep.

When I woke up again, humping against the mattress, it was one-thirty! I finally had another chance to masturbate! Then I wondered if it was really safe -- Judy had told me to call her only until one, but I didn't know if she went to sleep right afterward. I thought about trying to control myself for another hour, lying still until Judy was sure to be asleep, but I lacked the will power. I kicked the covers off, turned a little on my side and started stroking off, feeling Judy's fingers on my cock instead of my own -- I didn't do this often enough to get used to that feeling and it gave me a huge erotic thrill. To speed things up even more, I fantasized about Judy catching me like this, concentrating on the sore feeling in my behind from my whippings of the last two days, and when I got within a minute of climax I had to guess odd or even.