Twin Peaks: An Appeal of the Heart

The doctor gave a single nod, casting a glance in Audrey's direction. Dale imagined the good doctor was contemplating his own teenage daughter, terrified of what could happen to her someday. Doc Hayward said farewell and departed.

As soon as the doctor was gone, Dale felt his posture sag slightly. Turning to Audrey's bedside, he pulled up a chair and sat to wait, and watch.

She was lovely, even in her exhausted and abused state. Curled up on her side facing him, her hair was strewn across the pillows and her cheek, one hand resting under her chin. Slowly her side stretched and rose, then fell with her slow gentle breathing. In her sleep her high arched eyebrows twitched occasionally, as if in deep concentration.

Dale contemplated with horror what might have been done to her at One Eyed Jack's. The level of cruelty displayed by her captors did not bode well. Looking at her, feeling his heart softened by her peaceful sleeping form, he felt an anger rising up in him. The idea of Audrey forced, hurt, by a stranger to her, perhaps while she was unconscious or even as she pleaded for him to stop, clawed at this inside of his mind. He felt his throat tightening and his hands were clenched into tight white-knuckled fists. If such a man existed, Cooper wanted him dead.

Breaking his vigil Dale stepped away to calm himself. He returned to the kitchen and brewed a cup of coffee. As he moved about the kitchen he reminded himself that perhaps nothing of the sort had happened. Sipping at a mug printed with the words "#1 Sheriff" he commenced a brief search for reading material. Better to have something to occupy his mind elsewhere, he thought as he settled back in by the bedside.

It was in the wee hours of the morning, before the sun had risen, that Audrey awoke. It was a moment he longed for and dreaded. She had lain in the same position the entire time she had slept, and now she rolled onto her back and stretched. Some color had returned to her face, and the dark circles were subsiding.

"Agent Cooper," she said, when she saw him. The dream hadn't ended yet. Seeing his serious and worried face made her smile in spite of herself.

"Hello Audrey," he said, moving to sit on the side of the bed.

She rolled back onto her right side, so that her body curled around him as he sat, as she had done the first time she regained consciousness. He had held her then while she cried. Now he reached out and stroked her cheek with his right hand. She closed her eyes and placed her own hand on top of his. But now she wasn't crying. The feel of his hand against her skin was heaven.

Dale hated what he had to do.

"Audrey," he said.

"Yes?" she asked with a sigh of contentment, opening her eyes.

"I have to ask you a very difficult question."

Her eyes opened wider. "What is it?" What could be the matter?

"While you were at Jack's, did anyone," he slowed, faltering, "did anyone hurt you? Did any of the men..." he trailed off, unable to bring himself to say it. A deep furrow had settled on his brow.

Her eyes seemed to become heavy and dark. Dale felt his breath catch.

"No," she said, quietly. "No. Except for the fact that I was tied up, and the drugs, and that Mr. X hit me once, I was left alone."

"But?" Dale asked, sensing there was something she was hesitant to say.

She remained silent for a moment, and he knew there was more.

Audrey was thinking, fast. Her mind wasn't quite up to speed yet, but she knew that this was the decisive moment. If she was ever going to catch Agent Cooper, it was now. She had realized that it was his logic, his rational mind, that she had to overcome. And now, with him here, his face so soft and concerned, she knew that she could appeal to her ally: his heart. She had to strike while the iron is hot.

"But I was afraid," she said, biting her lip. Closing her eyes, she brought back all those feelings of fear and helplessness that she had at Jack's, and flooded herself with them. Remembered all her prayers, how desperately she had hoped for Agent Cooper to rescue her. A trembling crept through her body, and fresh tears came to her eyes. Then she looked steadily into his eyes and let the tears well up and run over.

Normally she controlled herself, kept these emotions wrapped up beneath the surface. It helped her to feel in control, and safe. But if she had any hope of winning Dale over, she knew she had to show them to him.

"I was afraid," she continued, "that someone would hurt me. Jean Reno especially. Or that he would sell me to someone." She shuddered then, pressing her face more firmly Agent Cooper's hand, which was still on the side of her face. "I'm a virgin. I thought maybe he could get more money for me if he knew."

Dale felt like his insides were being wrung out by a strong and merciless pair of hands. His pulse was quickening, but he waited for her to finish.

"But what I was afraid of, most of all," Audrey said, pushing herself up in bed to get herself on eye level with Agent Cooper, "was that someone would take me for the first time, and it wouldn't be you."

"Audrey..." Dale said, shocked, unsure what actually to say. He wasn't prepared for this, and it swept over hims like a tidal wave of conflicting emotions.

"I know," she said, "I know you think I'm too young. But please listen to me. This experience, it's changed me. I had a lot of time to think. To think about what I wanted to do differently in my life, and what was important to me." Her voice was growing stronger, more sure of itself. It had a definitive, impassioned edge to it, a full-toned cutting certainty. "I promised myself, if I survived, that I would tell you," she passed over a ravine of uncertainty, but had too much momentum to do anything but continue, full speed ahead, "that I love you. And that you're what's important to me."

Dale took a very deep breath, his nostrils flaring. She was sitting so close, he could smell her. He remembered the way her perfume and her skin had smelled the night when she came to his room. It was just as intoxicating now as it was then. And she was sitting so close, staring intently at him with a newly hardened maturity. It was almost more than he could bear.

"Please," she said. "Please don't refuse me again. You'll break my heart."

She leaned in then, slowly, cautiously, to bring her face close to his. He did not back away, but he did not lean in either.

"Please," she all but breathed as she closed more distance, her lips parted and mere inches from his. She felt her heart hammering wildly against her ribs.

There was a war going on inside Dale. It was a thunderous raging battle. He felt frozen, even as he felt tossed about, like a dingy in raging swells and wind. But he knew the every moment of indecision was in itself a decision, drawing him closer to the final conclusion. And when he saw her lips part, saw her gaze fall to his own mouth, he could resist no longer.

When the dam gave way inside of Dale, it gave way in a crashing inexorable flood of white water. Without another thought, he closed the distance between their mouths, kissing her with a ferocity that threatened to overwhelm him. His left hand tangled in her hair, pulling her face to him while his right arm found its way around her body. In a single fluid movement he turned and pulled her across his lap, his right hand on her waist now, and his left around her back. She wrapped both her arms around him, pressing her chest against his.

Cooper felt his body shifting, his physiology transforming him into a more basic instinctual creature. The smell and the taste of her made him feel like his skin was burning. He longed to press the length of his body against her, to feel as much of her skin as possible all at once.

Moving his mouth away from hers, he slid his cheek across hers, feeling her smoothness against his light stubble. He began to kiss her neck, and the soft moans that escaped her were like symphonic orchestrations, pure aphrodisiac to his ears. It made him want to hear more noises. He kissed his way to her ear, and took her lobe between his teeth, nibbling gently. These noises were different, more urgent, more hungry.

Her hands began to roam over his arms, his back, exploring the foreign and wondrous topology of his body. Audrey felt like she might explode, or faint, and was terrified that she might for fear that she miss a single moment. He was strong, his muscles hard and his shirt tight over his hot skin. She wanted to feel his skin, wanted to feel all if his skin. Soon she was tugging on his shirt, trying to remove it.

"Audrey," Dale said, trying to reign himself in, "not tonight."

"What?" Audrey said, sadness and just a hint of outrage in her voice. "Did I do something wrong?" she asked, teetering on the edge of disappointment.

Dale let out a soft chuckle, getting in control of himself. "No," he said, bringing his face down to her hair and breathing her in deeply, "you didn't do anything wrong." He moved his face back to her neck and kissed her there for a little while, feeling the tension retreat from her body as he kissed her. Delightful. He pulled his face back to look at her steadily. "I just don't think now is the right time."

"Why not?" she asked, a fear beginning to grow inside of her, fear that she had lost him.

"Well, you've been through a great deal of trauma," he said, brushing stray hairs away from her face, then pressing his palm against her cheek. "I want to make sure you are fully recovered before we go any further. And," he continued, with a serious tone in his voice, "I want to make sure that this is what you really want."

Her face fell. "You're just saying that. You'll change your mind, and it will never happen." She was looking down and away sullenly. There was the girl he knew.

Catching her chin in his fingers he pulled her face to his again and gave her a long, slow, gentle kiss. He could feel her body melt, heard her breathing quicken and felt the energy pulsing under her skin, but he kept himself in control. He broke away to speak. "Audrey, I give you my word that I will not change my mind. I promise you, that when you are fully recovered, I will give you what you want. Everything you want," he said, brushing his lips against hers teasingly, but not kissing her. He heard the little gasp she made and it brought a smile to his lips.

"I want to believe you mean that," she said, "but I'm ready now. Please," she said, "it's all I want in the world."

He chuckled again. "Audrey," he said, "you are very tenacious. I'll tell you what," he continued, rubbing his chin. "How about I give you something, as a goodwill offering. Something to assure you I mean business."

"Give me what?" she asked, with a sultry and hungry note in her voice.

"Something very special," he said, giving her a sideways look, "and in return you promise to wait patiently for the rest."

"What if I am not reassured?" she asked, lifting her arched brows sharply.

"Audrey," Dale said, leaning in close, "if you are not reassured, then my name isn't Dale Cooper." And he punctuated his statement with another long kiss.

"You're doing that on purpose, to scramble my brain," she said, eyes closed, on a high from his kiss.

"Any complaints?" he asked.

"No," she said with a wry twist of her lips, not opening her eyes.

"Do we have a deal?" he asked.

Opening her eyes and fixing him with an inquisitive and suspicious glare she said, "Deal."

"Alright then," he said, lifting her off his lap, and standing. "Give me five minutes."

"Where are you going?" she asked with a slightly alarmed tone.

He bent down, and catching her face between his hands, he kissed her. Then he said, "I'm going to shave. Five minutes. I promise."

In the Bookhouse's small restroom, Dale ordered his shaving kit on the counter next to the basin. He was always very particular on the matter of his personal grooming. He had packed his razor and shaving cream automatically when he knew he would be staying a night away from his room.

First, he removed his black turtleneck, so that he was wearing only his sleeveless undershirt. Carefully spreading a generous lather on his face, he worked in even strokes with quick efficient movements. Though he was staring at his own reflection, he saw nothing, so occupied was he with thoughts of Audrey. He felt like he had entered very morally questionable waters. True, she was legally an adult, and very certain of herself. And this ordeal seemed to have given her a new, if somewhat jaded, maturity.

But she was still so young, it worried him. Was this ethical? To become sexually involved, at his age, with such an ingenue? Did he really have it in him to deflower her? He knew instantly that he did, and it troubled him. Perhaps he wouldn't have to, she'd come to her senses. However, he felt bound by his word, which he had given her, unwisely so, and there was nothing else to do. He wanted her, in a way he had not wanted a woman in a very long time, but after keeping his own desires harnessed tightly for so long, he felt uncertain. And Dale was anything but used to feeling uncertain of himself.

Splashing the remains of shaving cream from his face with water from the sink and patting himself dry, he decided to cross that bridge when he came to it. Feeling his face and chin with his fingertips he inspected his handiwork. Perfectly smooth. He could probably get two more good uses out of the blade before retiring it.

Looking himself squarely in the eye, he made a decision. Tonight he would set aside his worries. He would give Audrey her goodwill offering, his mouth quirked into a small smile at this, and he would allow himself to enjoy it. And enjoy it he would, thoroughly.

Audrey visibly relaxed when he returned.

"I thought maybe you snuck off," she said, smiling at him.

"Never," he said, coming to sit on the bed and face her squarely. "Audrey, this is very important. I need you to listen."

She said nothing, but nodded, curious.

"I am going to give you the gift I promised, but if at any time you change your mind, or don't like what's happening, I want you to say so, okay? This is for you, not for me."

She nodded again, face serious. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course."

"Why did you shave?"

A smile broke across his face, that secret smile of his that she had been longing to see. He took one of her hands and raised it to his face so that she could feel the softness of his skin. "So that I don't scratch you," he said.

He moved closer to kiss her, running his fingers through her hair, caressing her neck. He could feel the heat building within her as he touched her skin. He brought his full attention to her responses, while keeping his own desire under careful control. Listening for any sound, any shift in breathing, he began to kiss her neck again. Then, when he felt it was time, he removed her shirt. She was not wearing a bra, and her full firm breasts were glorious. Cooper felt a savage hunger in him looking at her. She bit her lower lip in that seductive way of hers, looking away and then back at him, gauging his reaction.

"Beautiful," he said, and he cupped her left breast in his right hand as he applied his mouth and tongue to the nipple of the other. Her noises were louder now, explosive almost and fiery, as she raked her fingers through his hair, creating total disarray. Dale felt as though a fire were burning in his chest, but he kept the damper on, keeping it to a slow steady heat so that he would not rush anything. But he could feel his pulse rising with every passing moment.

"Lie back," he said, and unlaced her sleeping shorts, tied at the waist. She complied instantly, and when he looked her in the eyes as he removed her shorts and underwear together, she flushed a deep desirable crimson. He kept his eyes on her face, noting how very red her mouth had become, unaided by her usual make up, and how very widely dilated her irises were. The flush in her cheeks remained. He reveled in all her signs of arousal, savored them like delicacies. Then he closed his eyes and breathed her scent deeply.

He pulled her to the edge of the bed so that her feet swung freely from her knees. Kneeling, he brought his face down and kissed her navel, around her navel, and then began to work his way further south, with painstaking slowness. As he came near his goal, he looked up at her. "Is this okay?" he asked, quite serious, wanting nothing more than to continue, but needing her assent.

Audrey had never wanted anything more in her life. Every moment he was not kissing her was exquisite torture, and here he was wasting his mouth on words. She moaned with frustration and tried to push his face into her. He felt light-headed with arousal, and chuckled in a happy and satisfied fashion. He decide to tease her, kissing his way down the inside of one thigh, and then up the other. She felt like she couldn't breath, every kiss increasing her urgency. Unable to resist, she grabbed two fistfuls of his hair and tried again to push him. This time he let her.

She let out a gasp, and Dale felt himself going drunk on the taste and the smell of her. It was like the floor came out from under him. He had no words to describe it, only that it was a unique and beautiful and she was, and it drove him to the edge of madness with desire for her. He could hear the smile in her moans as he ran his tongue over her, felt her shudder with delight.

Then, he brought his right hand down and slowly, carefully, pushed his index finger inside of her. She was ready for it, so very ready, and the tenor of her moans deepened with a new hunger. Moving her hips, she pressed herself against his hand, bringing him deeper inside.

"More," she said.

It was the best word Dale had ever heard. He lived for this moment. There were many, many beautiful and wonderful things in this world, things that so often delighted and amazed him. But nothing, absolutely nothing, was like pleasing a beautiful woman for whom he had genuine affection. Cunnilingus, he believed, was a noble and beautiful art, perfected only by careful attention to details, keen observation, and spirit of true generosity. He adored the act, found it almost addictive in its appeal. And doing it for Audrey was steadily pushing him towards insanity with lust.

Slowly and carefully, he built the tension within her. It was like delicately finding the right resonance and fine tuning his movements to create the maximum effect. Audrey was his instrument, his stradivarius, and he played her with great affection and desire. He took care not to push her over the edge too quickly, drawing out the moment and holding her at the summit.

"Please," she said, her neck arched back so he could not see her face, "Do it, please."

The raw unadulterated desire in her voice, the animal craving that showed through it, made him dizzy. He obeyed. Spasms passed through her body, and he heard the cries that she made, achingly sweet and so loud, his name among them. He kept going until the tension started to ebb from her body, and smiled. Pulling her back all the way onto the bed, he lay down next to her and stroked her face, watching her relax.

She opened her eyes, bright and shiny, a deep flush in her face still. Opening her mouth to speak, she could not seem to form words. Giving up she let out a deep satisfied sigh, and then, "Mmmm." Snuggling against him, she continued to make small soft noises, the occasional tremor passing through her. In moments, she was asleep.

For many minutes Dale lay with her, watching her. He hoped that he had not taken too much out of her. But, he reminded himself, orgasm could be very healing. He sighed, looking into her face and feeling things stirring within him that he thought had been long dead. He felt totally at her mercy, this young devilish thing, at yet at the same time she was so sweetly innocent.