Waiting for the Exeter Express

"Yes you do, and after last night I'll worship it even more."

"Not too much I hope. I do like it but I wouldn't want it there exclusively."

"Don't worry, little Kev's far too much of a gentleman to come in where he's not wanted."

She slapped my chest and started to get off me. My softening cock plopped out of her and she sat on the bed looking at it for a moment before taking the whole thing into her mouth. She sucked on it and ran her tongue over the tip picking up the small amount of semen still oozing out. She pulled her head off and licked her lips.

"I love the taste of us." She got up and put on her short silk robe. "I'm going down to make the coffee and start breakfast. Don't be long."

I went into the bathroom for my usual morning ablutions. As I stepped out of the shower raised voices came up from the kitchen. I opened the bathroom door to find out what was being said. It wasn't clear enough to follow so I moved to the top of the stairs.

"You're wasting your time." Erica said, "He loves me. He has twenty years invested in me and we have two sons. He won't be able to turn his back on that."

"Why not? You did."

Ouch! I said to myself as I heard that. Eugenia really knew how to hit where it hurt most.

"That was just a blip. He'll forgive me in time, and when he does you'll be history."

"What makes you think he can forgive you? You turned your back on him when he needed you most."

"He'll forgive me, because he loves me."

"Well if he loves you so much, why is it me that has the taste of him in my mouth and his cum running down my leg?"

I'd reached the bottom of the stairs when I heard the slap. As I walked, still dripping, to the kitchen Erica came rushing out. I grabbed at her arm.

"What the hell is going on."

She said nothing, just pulled her arm free and ran up stairs. I walked, wet and naked into the kitchen to find Eugenia rubbing her cheek. She had tears welling up as she came to me.

"Is it true what she said? Will you forgive her and take her back."

"Yes and No."

"What kind of answer is that?"

I held her to me, making her robe wet as I did so. I lifted her chin and kissed her gently. "I'm pretty angry with her right now, but I know that over time that will subside. So yes, I may forgive her. Hate is such a negative emotion. However, don't confuse forgiving with forgetting. I will never forget what she did, and that means there is no going back. I gave her a week and that's all she's getting." I ran my hand down between her legs where a gooey mess was drying out. "Now what's this down here?"

"It's your cum leaking out."

"Why don't you come back up to the bathroom with me? You can get cleaned up while I dry off."

I dried off and left Eugenia in the shower while I got dressed. When I got back to the kitchen Erica was there looking for the frying pan. I put the coffee on to brew.

"If you want bacon and egg you are very welcome. Eugenia and I will have fruit, yoghurt and toast."

She stopped and then put the pan away. "I don't believe it. You've never turned down a fried breakfast before."

"Yeah, well a lot of things have changed. I rather like the idea of staying alive."

"Look, I'm sorry about earlier. I was a bit touchy after your performance last night. You really didn't have to rub my nose in it."

"I really don't know what you mean."

"Of course you do. All of that screaming last night. You are not telling me it's normal."

"Eugenia is quite vocal but perhaps last night she was a bit louder than normal, but that is beside the point. Your behaviour this morning was outrageous and I will not tolerate it. No matter how noisy she gets, if you so much as raise a hand to her again your feet will not touch the ground on the way out of that door. While you are living in this house you will treat her with respect."

"She's not right for you Kevin. She's what? Thirty? She'll want a family, and you can't give her that."

"She knows all about that, and if we decide we want a family then I'll get the vasectomy reversed"

Eugenia returned and we had a very quiet breakfast, after which I reminded Erica that she had some house hunting to do.

"You can't do this Kevin. This house is as much mine as it is yours, you can't throw me out."

"You want half the house? Divorce me. It's no problem. I had a financial audit done as soon as I got out of hospital. That's how I found out about your secret account. You can have half of what we were worth at that point. All you have to do is divorce me."

"I can't do that. I don't believe in divorce. Till death us do part, that's what we promised."

"You also promised to keep yourself only unto me. You didn't have much problem with that one. If you want a divorce settlement, there has to be a divorce. I'm certainly not paying for it. You'll have to go against your so called principles."

"Please don't do this to me Kevin."

"My mind's made up. You want your half, divorce me. In the mean time you need somewhere to live."

*****

Of course she didn't just go out and find a flat. We got as far as Wednesday and she still hadn't found anywhere. Everything offered was too expensive, too far out of town or just not suitable. She was stalling, trying to find a reason to be living in the house when the boys came home. I wasn't surprised, so on Wednesday afternoon we looked at a flat that was definitely within her price range.

She told me she liked it but couldn't possibly afford the deposit and to furnish the flat. I kept from her the fact that it was Eugenia's flat that we'd decided to rent out. As fast as Erica invented reasons to turn it down I changed the game. I'd get on the phone to Eugenia and pretend to negotiate. In the end we even threw in some of the furniture, including Eugenia's bed. On Thursday evening we moved Erica's stuff into Eugenia's old flat.

Peter arrived home first on Friday afternoon. He gave me a hug as he came through the door then gave Eugenia a peck on the cheek.

"Have you heard from mum?"

"Yes, she was sleeping in your room up until yesterday."

"She came home? After what she did to you, she just came back?"

"Yep and expected me to behave as if nothing had happened. She didn't think I'd tell you. She expected me to act as if everything was normal."

"You know Dad, I find it hard to believe she is the same woman that brought me up. How could she have changed so much."

"She hasn't changed where you're concerned. Her world still revolves around you and James. It's me she has a problem with. If I'm honest about it, my wants and needs haven't mattered to her for years. I failed to see it. I started out giving way to her because I loved her so much. Later I did it to guarantee a quiet life. I didn't want you growing up with parents fighting, so I let things ride, let her have her own way. I realise now that I was slowly destroying what little respect she had for me."

Peter hugged me again. I saw tears in his eyes. "I'm so proud of you Dad, we both are, James and I. You got it so wrong though. We saw what was happening, we wanted you to dig your heels in and get what you wanted for a change, but you never did."

"I was an addict, I loved her and you boys so much, I would have given up anything to keep what I had. Like an addict I had to reach rock bottom to force me to change. I certainly did reach it, and once there, the only way back was without your mother."

James came home the following day. I'd expected a phone call to ask me to pick him up from the station. This time a pretty young girl in an old Vauxhall Nova dropped him off. I opened the door and greeted him with a hug. His first words surprised me.

Eugenia came out to greet him. She stood on tip toes and just managed to kiss his cheek.

"Hello James, it's so nice to meet you at last."

James stepped back from her. "So you must be the Greek floozy mum told me about."

"JAMES." I yelled."You seem to have forgotten your manners. I suggest you go back and get them."

He turned to me and slowly a smile spread across his face. "Sorry Dad, Mum called me last night and told me you'd thrown her out and replaced her with some Greek floozy. According to her your heart attack was something and nothing, definitely nothing to worry about. I couldn't resist a bit of a wind up."

He held Eugenia and kissed her cheek. "Hello Eugenia, I'm really pleased to meet you at last. Thank you so much for looking after my dad."

He looked back at me and studied my face." It wasn't funny was it? Sorry Dad."

"No! It wasn't funny James, but it does lead me into something. I want you both to go and see your mother. You may not agree with what she's done recently but she's still your mother. For twenty years she's done a damned good job of bringing you up."

They spent the first week with me before starting their summer jobs. I know they visited their mother at least once.

As soon as they started work I didn't see a lot of them. Most nights they went out but they did assure me that they both saw Erica once a week. Eugenia and I took a little holiday. Three weeks in Cyprus, of course. I got to meet all the family and I mean all of the family, uncles and aunts, grandparents and cousins. They held two parties in our honour and I had to learn to dance. Eugenia had a great time once she managed to stop the family badgering me about marriage.

At the farewell party, her father and brother took me aside. With both men slapping me on the back, The sudden change in the conversation took me by surprise.

"I love you Kevin."Her father told me. "I love you like my own son. Iannis, he love you like a brother. My Eugenia, she love you with a passion you British will never understand. But I tell you this, you hurt my little girl and I will kill you. This is so Iannis, yes?"

Iannis nodded his head. "Oh yes, we kill you, but not now."

"What about Neville?" I asked. "He hurt her."

"I tell you this, if he ever comes to Cyprus we kill him." her father said, "My brother works in airport security. If he comes here I will be told."

Iannis agreed. "If we go to England we will find him and kill him." He slapped me on the back again. "We talk of this no more. Now we dance, come, come."

The bouzouki band started to play a tune that I only know as `Zorba the Greek' and we returned to the dance floor. With arms on each other's shoulders we danced. One by one all the other men joined in.

That night, in bed, I mentioned the threats to Eugenia. She laughed. "He doesn't really mean he will kill you, it is a figure of speech here. When a Cypriot say he will kill you he means he is very angry with you. If everyone who said that killed someone we'd have no one left alive."

I drew a little comfort from that but I still felt relief when we got on the plane home.

When term started in September, the doctors passed me as fit to return to work. Eugenia and I turning up together raised a few eyebrows, but apart from that nothing much had changed. Peter and James returned to university in October. The house became quiet, apart from the noise of our lovemaking. Throughout the summer break Erica barely crossed my mind at all, so it came as a surprise when she called me.

"What's the problem Erica?" I asked

"No problem. I wanted to talk to you for a while. I've got a job."

"Well that's good news, what will you be doing?"

"The same as before, running a kindergarten."

"So what do you want from me? Do you want a reference or something?"

"No Kevin, nothing like that, the job is in Taunton. I'll be moving in with my sister until I get back on my feet. I was wondering if you would be good enough to drive me to the station?"

"Are you sure you wouldn't rather take a taxi. I'll pay if you're a bit short."

"No! Really, I'd like you to drive me if you can. It will give us a chance to talk one last time."

"Okay When is it? I can do Tuesday morning or Thursday afternoon."

"Right, I'll make it Tuesday morning. Thank you Kevin."

Eugenia was convinced that Erica had an ulterior motive. I wanted her out of my life. I hoped she wanted to talk about divorce, but maybe that was too much to hope for.

The weekend flashed by and in no time it was Tuesday morning and I was parked outside of Erica's flat. She came out to meet me, and invited me in for a coffee. We sat for a while and before she started to talk.

"I've been a selfish bitch haven't I."

"You'll get no denials from me on that score."

"Same old Kevin. Don't sugar coat things just give it to me straight."

"Well you did ask."

"Yes I did. --Tell me Kevin, are you happy? Does she make you happy?"

"Yes she does. She really cares about what I want. We don't fight for control all the time."

"Is that how you saw our relationship?"

"Not at the time, but lying in hospital, I had plenty of time to think, so yes that's how I see it now. Why, don't you?"

"At the time I didn't but I understand now. I always loved you Kev, but somewhere along the way I lost respect for you. Every time there was any conflict you backed down. I complained about your music, you stopped playing it. I refused to go with you to bike meetings and you stopped going."

"Come off it Ric, you did more than complain about my music. You walked into the room and switched it off. When I argued about that you would start with `What on earth is that awful noise? The neighbours will think you're killing me.' You came at me with all guns blazing. I didn't' want the boys to see us arguing so I gave in, it didn't seem that important. When it comes to the bike racing, you know it was more than just you not wanting to go. I remember all the emotional blackmail, telling me how the boys needed shoes while I was having fun going to race meetings. You told me I was always too busy to spend time at home but could wangle a weekend off to go bike racing. I worked long hours to give you the things you said you needed. I stopped going to races because to be quite honest it was a choice between that and giving up on my family, and I couldn't stand the thought of losing my boys."

"Looking back on it, I wish I hadn't given up doing the things you didn't like. With everything I gave up, a little piece of Kevin Johnson died. I wasn't me anymore, I was just your husband, doing whatever you wanted to do. I actually enjoyed being at work. At least there I felt important. Colleagues respected me, my students looked up to me and twenty year old girls flirted with me. At home I was completely under your control but it didn't make any difference, in fact it got worse even when you got your own way all the time."

I watched as the tears rolled down her face. She was silent for a while, then dried her eyes and looked at me.

"I'm sorry Kevin, I can't tell you why I did those things. I suppose it was because of mum and dad, they always had a stormy relationship. I suppose I thought it was normal. Mum would provoke dad they would fight and a couple of days later they would make up. When I provoked you, you just went quiet and kept it inside. I started to look upon you as some sort of wimp. Even my father fought back more than you."

"As I recall he walked out on your mother when you were twelve. Didn't that teach you anything? If that's your idea of what a marriage should be like, I wish you'd told me at the start. We could both have avoided a lot of heartache. I'll tell you now Ric, at the point when your sex drive went mad, I was all set to chuck it in. If we made love once a month it would have been unusual and even that was only if you'd had a drink or two. You didn't even like me touching you.

Do you have any idea what that does to a man, constantly coping with the rejection. We were so far apart and I only saw it getting worse, but I stood by you. I thought that when we were on our own it would either get better or we'd have to call it quits. All that changed when you suddenly started being affectionate again. I really thought there was some hope for us. I soon found out it was all about you again. You wanted sex, I was just the most convenient source. "

She was sobbing again and I sat quietly while she got some control back. Eventually she managed to get a few words out. "I'm sorry Kevin, I really am. I didn't realise how bad things were until I looked back on the way I treated you. When things started to go wrong for you, I should have made sure that you saw a doctor. I was too caught up with my own needs to see what it meant for you. I looked for instant relief and gave you the Viagra. My God, I could have killed you."

"I don't blame you for being angry with me, The things I did and said to you. Were unforgivable. I don't know what came over me. I really thought I could do anything I pleased and you would just accept it."

I looked at my watch. "What time is your train? Shouldn't we be making a move?"

"The Exeter express gets to the station at 11:15am. I need to be there by then. I'll get my bag and we can go."

I carried her bag down to the car. It seemed a bit on the light side. As I walked past her car another question came to me.

"What's with the going by train? Why don't you drive and take all your stuff with you?"

"You know I don't like driving long distances. Besides, parking is almost impossible in Taunton and Julie's house is only a stone's throw from the kindergarten. I've offered the car to James, if he wants it. If not, perhaps you could sell it for me."

I nodded acceptance and got into the car. As she got in Erica smiled at me, such a warm loving smile it knocked me back a bit.

"I didn't need to ask. I can see she makes you happy. You've got that sparkle back. The sparkle in your eyes, you had when I fell in love with you. I wondered what had happened to it. I guess over the years I just ground it out of you. I'm glad it's back."

The rush hour traffic had thinned out significantly and I got her to the station in no time at all. I found a space in short term parking and we sat in the car just looking at each other.

"It really is too late for us isn't it Kevin?"

"Yes it is, this time you went too far. There's no way back. Why don't you just divorce me and get it over with?"

She stroked my cheek. "I can't do that Kevin my love. Till death us do part I vowed and I'm not breaking any more. I'll always be your wife, even if you divorce me."

I shook my head as I got out of the car and grabbed her bag. We walked arm in arm into the station and out onto the platform.

"There's no need to wait. You'll need to get back to work."

I nodded and turned to leave but she grabbed my arm. "Tell the boys, I love them."

"Tell em yourself, Taunton's not that far away."

"No more pretence Kevin. They only come to see me because you send them."

"Give them time. They'll come round."

She reached up put a hand round my neck, pulled my head down and kissed me with a passion I'd forgotten she possessed. As we broke the kiss she whispered to me.

"I love you Kevin Johnson and I will release you. Now go before I burst into tears."

Water was welling up in my eyes as I turned and walked away. You don't walk away from over twenty years without some sadness. I got in the car and without hesitation, started the engine and drove away. I'd just parked in the college car park when my phone rang. It was Eugenia and I answered immediately.

"Has she gone?"

"Well I guess so, I left her on the platform waiting for the Exeter express. She should be well on her way by now."

"I doubt it. The express doesn't stop at Braunceston Junction, and it doesn't go to Taunton. Are you sure that was the train she was catching."

"Well that's the one she said she was waiting for—oh my god."

"What is it Kevin? What's wrong?"

"I can't talk now Gen. I've got to get back to the station."

I threw the phone down, started the car and with a squeal of tyres left the car park. I'm surprised I didn't get arrested for my driving as I made my way back to the station. I broke the speed limit and ran red lights, anything to get me there quicker. As soon as I reached the entrance I could see I was too late. The forecourt was filled with police cars and an ambulance. I left my car in the forecourt and ran to the entrance. The mesh gates were closed and locked. After some minutes of my rattling the gates and yelling, a police officer came to speak to me.