Was She or Wasn't She...My Daughter?

"Excuse me, boss, but this is for you." She said handing me a carrying tray with a bag and a large soda on it. In the bag was a deluxe burger and large order of fries.

"What is this?"

She laughed. "That lady just pulling out ordered it and told me to bring it out to you."

I looked in time to see 'Hook 'em Horns' turn onto the street. I laughed and told her what had happened. She went back inside and I got my truck started.

The next Saturday, I was at my parent's house mowing their lawn. My truck was sitting there with the hood up because I had checked the oil. I felt rather than heard someone near me. I looked and saw the driver of the Avalon standing there.

I stopped the mower.

"Well, hello. How's your car?"

"Fine. Thanks to you. They couldn't fix the flat, so I had to buy a new tire. Apparently I drove on it after it went flat. Uh, listen. I was visiting a friend of mine down the street and I saw your truck. If you need another yard to take care of, mine and a couple of others in my neighborhood could use some attention."

I just looked at her. Then it dawned on me. She thinks I need a job and is trying to help me. The last two times she has seen my truck the hood was raised which indicated to her that it was broken.

I explained to her what I was doing when I heard the unmistakable sound of a powerful motor coming down the street. I looked and saw a red Ferrari turn into Lois's parents driveway. I watched as Lois and Jerry got out and went inside. He had obviously switched from the Maserati. Switched. I hated that fucking word!

I realized that other than hating the word 'switched', I felt nothing when I saw them. Then I looked back at my visitor. "Thank you, but this is my parent's house. They're out of town and I'm just doing them a favor."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I saw your truck with the hood up again and you cutting grass and assumed...I'm so embarrassed."

I laughed. "No need to be. By the way, thank you for the lunch last week."

"Oh, my God. Now, I'm mortified." I laughed and then she did as well.

We stood and talked for a while. Finally, I said. "Hey, you said your lawn could use some help. I'd be happy to come over and take care of it."

She looked at me and smiled. "That would be wonderful. Thank you."

I put the mower away and followed her to her house. Nice house with a big yard which hadn't been mowed in quite some time. The garage could accommodate three cars. In addition to her Avalon there was a Lexus sitting there. The third space held a nice zero turn lawn mower and various other yard implements and tools most men have around. I figured the husband had been too busy lately to cut the grass.

I had never been on a zero turn mower so it took a little time to figure out how it worked, but I managed and two hours later the lawn was mowed and trimmed. When I was finished, she offered to pay me but I refused but told her I would take something cold to drink. So we sat on the porch, had a glass of iced tea and talked. Her name was Christine, Chris for short. Her husband died eight months ago. He had a heart attack while jogging and died before they could get him to the hospital. He had been the manager of one of the oil refineries in town. She worked in an upscale jewelry store so they had done pretty well financially. Before I knew it, the sun had started to go down. I asked her if she would consider having dinner with me. She hesitated and declined. I was disappointed, but accepting.

Life went on. Another month passed. My parents had come home, paid their bills, did their laundry, and left on another cruise. I had come to their house to check on things and was just leaving when the Avalon pulled into the drive and Chris got out.

"Well, hello."

"Hi. I have been by a couple of times hoping you would be here. Is that dinner invitation still open?"

"Of course."

"Good. How about tonight?"

And so it started. We dated for six weeks before having sex. It had been a long time for both of us, but we tried to make up for lost time. Slow, fast, easy, hard, in bed, in the shower, in the garage, in the cars. We even tried it in my truck once but that didn't work out so well. The only place we didn't do it was in her house. In fact, I had never been in her house. I had been in the garage, but never in the house. I figured it was because she still felt the presence of her husband there and was trying to hold on to it by not allowing me to invade that private space. I was okay with that...for now.

At the end of four months, I knew I was in love and I started to tell her, but she stopped me.

"I think I know what you are going to say, but before you say it, I have something to tell you. I have never lied to you, but I haven't told you everything either." She paused, took a deep breath and spoke. "When you first asked me to dinner, I hesitated because I have children. Two of them. Since Jack died, I've heard that it is difficult for women with children to have any kind of meaningful relationship with a man because he won't want a 'ready made' family. After you asked me out and I said no, I thought about it and realized that I wanted to go out and socialize again. You were supposed to be just a date or two. Nothing serious so not telling you about the children didn't seem to matter. But as I got to know you and developed feelings for you; things changed. Then my feelings got stronger and I started feeling guilty about not telling you. Then fear took over. Fear because I was afraid that I would lose you if I told you and fear that I would lose you if I didn't tell you." A long silence. "I'm sorry."

I looked at her and she started crying. "I'm so sorry. I was just selfish."

I remembered another woman who was selfish. Goddamn it. Why can't people just be honest? Why do we have to play games and fuck with relationships and emotions? I thought about Lois and her cheating and lying and my anger started to rise. I was sure that I loved this woman and thought she loved me, but she left me out of the biggest part of her life. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

"So you decided to keep them secret? You didn't have enough confidence in me to tell me about such a huge part of your life? And you didn't have enough faith in our relationship to believe that it might not matter?"

I started for the door then stopped and turned to her and very calmly and quietly said. "I have done nothing to lead you to believe that it would matter. I have done nothing to cause you to think that I wouldn't want to share every part of your life. I have done nothing to justify you not involving me in the most import aspect of your life. And I have done nothing to warrant being made to feel like I am the lowest item on your food chain."

I went home.

The next three weeks were the worst I have ever had. For some reason they were worse than finding out about Lois's cheating and her baby. I missed Chris.

Up to then, my restaurants were all about hamburgers and chicken, but I was thinking of adding a pizza parlor or two. I heard of one which was for sale, and was walking through it with its current owner. It was located in a shopping mall food court and we had just started to go behind the counter and into his office when I heard a squeal and felt something grab around my legs. I looked down into the most beautiful face I had ever seen. She looked up at me and smiled.

"Hi, daddy."

Shocked, I reached down and picked her up. She had grown. "Hi, princess." Betty hugged me so tightly I could hardly breathe.

"Momma, this is my first daddy."

I looked through the mist in my eyes and saw Chris standing there staring at us.

"Hello." She said.

"Hi"

"I take it you two know each other."

"Yeah. We do. It's been a long time. She's grown. I don't know how she remembers me."

"You're pretty hard to forget."

We just looked at each other all the while Betty was chattering away. I didn't hear a word she said because I was focused on Chris. Finally, I heard Betty say something about sister.

"I'm sorry, princess. What did you say?"

"I said, 'that's my sister'." And she was pointing to a little girl standing beside Chris. I looked and saw a miniature version of Lois. The same hair, the same smile, the same eyes. "Her name is Jackie."

"Hello, Jackie. How are you?"

"Fine, thank you."

I looked at Chris.

"I...I...I have no idea what to say. Never in my wildest dreams would I ever have connected you with...with..."

"Betty? That's still her name. We saw no reason to change it." Betty was still clinging to me. "Come on girls, let's leave Mr. Harrell alone. I'm sure he has a lot to do and we have shopping to finish."

Betty didn't want to leave and I didn't want her to.

"Uh, Chris, would you and the girls like to have some pizza?"

"Please, momma. Can we, please?"

She tried not to smile. "Why don't we eat at the house? We'll put something together."

"I'd like that."

"So would I."

Neither Betty nor I wanted to separate so I walked them to their car.

We had leftovers. Betty and I had meatloaf, Jackie had chicken and Chris had a salad, but she didn't eat much. The girls went to bed at eight thirty. Chris offered me a glass of wine. I accepted. She sat in what was obviously 'her chair'. It was sitting next to what was just as obviously 'his chair'. I opted for the sofa.

Nothing was said for several minutes.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the girls."

"Why didn't you? I mean besides the fact that they are who they are...the two girls who were switched at birth."

"I told you that I heard most men hated 'ready made' families, but that wasn't the whole truth. The truth is that Betty lost her first father, who, it turns out, is you. Then she lost her birth father, who was my husband, Jack. I didn't want her to develop a relationship with yet another man and lose him as well. I wasn't going to put her through that."

I took a sip of wine. I realized that of all the things she could have told me, all of the reasons she could have given me; this was the truth. I remembered she told me she was selfish. Well, this last minute had shown me that what she had done was the least selfish thing possible. She had sacrificed her happiness for her daughter. I put my glass down, stood and walked to her chair. There was fear in her eyes as they shifted to the door. She was afraid I was leaving. I moved to her chair, put my hands on the arm rests, leaned down and kissed her. She kissed me back.

"I love you."

She smiled. "I love you, too."

Three days later Jackie met my parents. They already knew Chris. Betty, of course, already knew them and felt right at home. She led Jackie through the house and showed her the toy box. It was fun watching them. Chris and I had discussed the advisability of bringing the girls here. Lots of situational challenges presented themselves especially when Lois's parents, and even Lois, saw Betty playing in the yard as they were bound to sooner or later.

My parents were having just as much trouble wrapping their heads around the situation as Chris and I were. No amount of logic, rationale, or credibility could cover our situation. We were making up the rules as we went along.

The next day, I was alone with my parents. "What are you going to do when Lois and her parents see Betty over here? You can't hide her, you know."

"We're not trying to hide her." I told them again that we were making up the rules as we went along.

It didn't take long for that ball to get rolling so to speak. A couple of days later Chris, the girls and I were eating pizza at the 'soon to be mine' pizza parlor in the mall. Lois's parents were strolling by and saw me and started over. They had not seen Betty yet. When they did, 'other mom' squealed. Betty heard her, recognized her and hugged her. I introduced them to Chris and Jackie. They knew Lois's side of the story and knew that she had given her birth daughter up for adoption. Who adopted her was, of course, private and not a matter of public record. They also knew that Betty had been returned to her birth parents.

But when they were introduced to Jackie, they knew they were looking at their real granddaughter. The resemblance to Lois was unmistakable. They saw the same things I did when I first saw her. 'Other mom' inhaled sharply. Chris couldn't miss it and looked at me. I nodded.

We sat and chatted for almost half an hour. Other mom's and other dad's eyes rarely left Jackie. If she noticed we couldn't tell.

Other mom's last comment as she left was "We really hope to see you and the girls again, Chris. Please?"

Chris nodded. "I'm sure that can be arranged."

I looked at my watch then at Chris. "I give her ten minutes."

Chris said. "Oh, God, Brian. What are we going to do?"

Chris had told me that she and her husband, Jack, knew that if they stayed in this city that something like this was inevitable. They had considered him taking a job transfer to avoid it, but then he died and her life was in limbo.

"We're going to live our lives and love the girls. We will handle each situation as it comes up."

I was wrong about the ten minutes. It took nine before my phone rang.

"Hello."

"Is it true?"

"Yes."

She hung up.

"Lois?"

"Lois."

I could hear the 'Oh, fuck' but the girls couldn't.

I took her hand. "I love you and we'll get through whatever comes down the pike."

I was at home later that evening when my phone rang. "Hello." Silence. I hung up. Ten minutes later the same thing. I turned it off.

My parents were between cruises and my mother called me every day to tell me that Lois's car was in her parents' driveway. Chris and I decided enough was enough. I told mom and dad that we would be there at noon on Sunday knowing that she would tell Lois's parents, who would, naturally, tell Lois.

At exactly noon we drove up in my new F-150 Club Cab. The red Ferrari was next door. We were still helping the girls out of their seats when Lois and Jerry headed in our direction. Betty ran to Lois and hugged her. Lois hugged her back, stroked her face and brushed her hair out of her eyes. Chris and Lois had never met. When this whole thing started, they were always separated.

"Hello. I'm Lois."

"I'm Christine. Jackie, come here, please. I would like you to meet someone. Her name is Lois."

"Hello." And she reached her hand out."

"Hello, Jackie. How are you" Lois slowly reached out her hand and took her daughter's hand. She held the handshake for as long as she thought she could.

"Would the two of you like to join us for lunch?" Asked Chris.

Lois and Jerry looked at each other. That was the last thing they expected.

"Uh, sure...I guess."

The first 15 minutes of lunch were tense. The next two hours were much better. We were joined for the last half hour by Lois's parents. Initially, Lois was a bit uncomfortable interacting with the girls but considering the circumstances, I thought things went pretty well.

Finally, Lois announced that she and Jerry had to leave. The four of us walked out to the front yard. Lois stopped and looked at Chris. She reached for her hand and held it.

"I wanted to make the right decision for Jackie, and you have confirmed that I did. I always thought that I wanted to be a mother, but I was wrong. Brian raised Betty. Not me." Pause while we all looked at each other. "I was not meant to be a mother...but I could be a very good aunt...if you would let me."

Then the tears started. Chris was in my arms and still crying as the powerful red Ferrari took off up the street and I heard the gears grinding as Jerry tried to shift gears, steer the car and hold a sobbing Lois all at the same time.

Lois was true to her word. She was a terrific aunt. Never missed a birthday, recital, soccer game or illness. Even for the twin nephews she staked claim to the following year.

Uncle Jerry takes turns taking all of the kids for rides in his Red Lamborghini.