What This Seems

Thank you for reading. I hope this keeps your attention; it's a bit different than my normal writing. As always, feedback is widely appreciated and constructive criticism is greatly welcome. Again, thank you for reading.

*****

Ten years ago, Joseph had come into my life. We married four years into our relationship. He was never the perfect man, nor did he ever make any attempt to keep me by his side. He never ensured my well being; he never offered the tenderness that I would crave for so many long nights on end.

Not long into the marriage, and not much to my surprise, I found evidence of infidelity. It didn't hurt, but I did feel spiteful.

Later that night, his father and I began talking. We ended up sleeping together, and had been ever since. The first time was six years ago, and we have since had two beautiful children together; two gorgeous girls.

A few years ago, we had to relocate due to career-related choices. We were only a few hours away from family, but it was startlingly difficult to move away from Lance. Of course, we would call the other every other day or so. It wasn't the same as feeling his body against mine . . .

However, this weekend was going to be different. Although Joseph would be working most days, Lance was spending the two days with the kids and I. Our kids.

Right now, they were fighting a nap. However, 'grandpa' was reading them a bedtime story while I watch from the doorway. His green eyes find mine as the girls fight over who would sit in his lap.

"Girls, please. There's room for you both," he says kindly, and they both snuggle into him. The sight is heartwarming; although nobody knew the truth but Lance and I.

Minutes later, we're kissing the girls goodnight and tucking them into bed. Although there's still some grumbling, they lay down groggily. Carefully, I close the door behind me and face Lance.

"They're growing too fast for me," he murmurs in a sad way, and I look up at him painfully. Slowly, his hands rest on my hips as he brings me closer.

"I try to send you pictures as often as I can," I say as his mouth brushes against mine. Joseph wasn't due home for a few hours, at least. "I'm sorry it's not the same."

"Don't be. Although . . . sometimes I wish you would send me more pictures of you . . ." he says quietly, his hands riding up my shirt. Instantly, we're kissing in a hurried, intense frenzy. His shirt is taken off, revealing well-sculpted abs for a fifty-four year old man. When I strip off his pants, the awaiting bulge beneath his boxers was impressive.

"We've been trying for another baby," I say, looking into his eyes. Lance looks at me, then sits up to pull me into a long, passionate kiss.

"I can help," he whispers into my ear, and I shout in pleasure as his cock slips inside. I know I'm wet for him; I can feel my arousal between my thighs. "You're so ready . . ."

"Only for you," I gasp as he buries himself deep within me; shouting as he moves aggressively. "Fuck me, Lance. Please . . . I need this."

"Here," he grasps me to his body and we switch positions. "I want to be in control."

"You always do," I grin up at him as he kisses me. He shoves his cock roughly into my awaiting depths, and I moan in my pleasure. With quick, short movements, I know this won't last long. He's too eager . . . as am I. I buck against him impatiently; my own climax is quickly approaching.

"You're so fucking tight . . . I'm so close," he growls, shoving his impressive length into me for a final thrust. "Sooooophiiiieeeee," he moans my name as I come against his cock.

"Lance, oh baby," we kiss passionately as he empties himself into my awaiting warmth.

For some time, he holds me against his body. His softening member threatened to slip out, but he pushes his hips closer to my own wetness. It's tender . . . and it's honestly the most real relationship in my life. What Lance and I had developed over the years . . . it was different than what Joseph and I had.

However, of course we were both complicated. We were both married to another . . . and I know he felt much worse than I did about our affair. Meredith and I had never gotten along, whereas Lance and I were always close, even before our intimacy.

"I hate that we have to keep this a secret . . . and I hate myself for allowing my feelings for you to develop into something so forbidden." he lets out a sigh, giving me a very brief kiss on the mouth. "I love you, Sophie."

"Lance!" I gasp, pulling him into yet another kiss. Goodness, how I've missed this. My body aches for his every night. Now that he's here . . . it was wonderful to be kissing him again, to say the least. "I love you, too."

"I've missed you so much. Hearing your voice . . . it was great, don't get me wrong. But feeling you against me . . ." his hands grab gently at my breasts. I moan beneath him and grin at his handsome face. His high cheekbones and angular jaw were magnificently cut and accentuated his gorgeous emerald eyes. Dark, curly hair was beginning to gray now, but he was still incredibly youthful. He didn't appear to be in his fifties, but he certainly couldn't pass of for my age.

"I'm surprised Meredith let you come," I say quietly, and his arms tighten around me.

"She knows there is something between us. And I honestly don't know how much more of a façade I can play while away from you. Sophie . . . you're my family. Joseph has never thought of me as anything more than a placemat and Meredith is . . ." he fades off, looking away from me. It was no news to me of just how crazy his wife could be. She had broken bottles over his back for simply taking the car keys away when she had too much to drink. Long story short, I was now caressing the long, deep scars as his cock slipped from my wetness.

"I can't feel guilty about this, Lance. Joseph is inattentive and has been faithful to none. You're . . . you're the father of my kids, Lance." my hands surround his face as our eyes meet. "And Meredith . . . she's awful to you. That's not fair . . ."

"One day . . . you and I are going to be together," he says, but I shake my head and kiss his neck.

"I don't want to complicate things more than they are . . . although, I really do miss you. These visits of yours need to be a bit more frequent," I say.

"Meredith is unbearable, Soph. I know I sound like an asshole, but I can't forgive her for everything. She's fucking nuts . . ." he closes his eyes. "She's been sleeping with the neighbor's son. Thank God he's over eighteen."

"I'm so sorry," I pull him into a hug. My naked breasts press into his bare chest. My nipples harden at the contact.

"Do you even love Joseph?" he asks, and I look away from him.

"I don't even know. He likes other women; he sleeps with other women. Oddly enough, I'm okay with our relationship. We don't fight . . . and I do have you." I look back at him, his gorgeous green eyes twinkling with emotion.

"That's so sad, Sophie." he kisses me deeply. Not to my surprise, I feel his stiffening manhood rub against my wet openness, and I moan at his touch. His hands expertly tweak my nipples and his teeth knowingly seek out my sensitive spots. Before long, he's thrusting himself into me once more.

"Fuck, Lance. Babyyyy," I gasp as his cock pushes me apart.

When he comes, it takes my breath away. The depth of his kiss; the way his hips needily bucked into my own . . . the strength of his arms that held me and the warmth and knowingness of his touch was overwhelming and comforting.

After we dressed, he held me until Joseph came home. The kids woke up in time for 'daddy' to play with them. While they played, Lance and I sat on lawn chairs and watched them.

"I'm going to file for divorce when I get home," he says quietly, his hand discretely holding mine. Our eyes meet. "If you do decide to . . ." he fades off, looking away.

"I don't know if I can, Lance." I murmur quietly, squeezing his fingers.

"Baby, you don't have to. Meredith is dangerous; I'm doing this for my safety. However . . . if I would make you happy, I would gladly take you and the kids into my new house. There's plenty of room." his tone is serious as his gaze falls on the two year old and four year old. They were spitting images of Lance; beautiful and perfect in every way. I had a feeling most of this weekend would be dedicated to playing with them . . . after this conversation was over.

"How would that look, Lance?" I ask quietly, and his eyes focus on mine. "And I am happy, so I don't know what you're talking about."

"Joseph doesn't make you happy. I can see the sadness in your face; it's been evident for years. When I hold you . . . I see you light up. I know your feelings for me go further than what you wish to admit. And you know what? So do mine. I'm incredibly in love with you, Sophie." his expression is completely serious.

"You're right, Lance. I do love you and care for you a whole lot more than what I want to admit. It's just . . . I don't know what Joseph would do. I have no idea what Meredith . . ." I stop, and his hold on my hand tightens.

"I would never, ever let her hurt you, baby. Ever," he says. "However, the decision is yours. I'm going to move closer and into a house. Like I said, there will be room for you . . . the girls . . . our girls."

"I love you, Lance," I say quietly. For a few moments, we gaze at one another. "Go play with your kids."

"I'll talk to you about this later. And I will make love to you again," he says quietly before standing and running after a curly-haired toddler.

For several minutes, I watch them all play. Lance is incredible with the kids, and it's soon clear who the girls prefer to play with. Joseph becomes sour, but it's adorable to see Lance with them. A few times, we make eye contact, and I can't help but beam at him.

Maybe it would be a good idea to start thinking of a permanent solution to my heartache. Although Joseph's infidelity didn't hurt, it left me alone most nights, craving attention. Not only that, but it was wonderful to be held delicately, at least every once in awhile. There was none of that with Joseph. We didn't argue, mainly due to his cold demeanor. It was much easier to stay quiet around someone who was irate.

With a small sigh, I watch Lance fall to the ground as the kids tackle him. He laughs, tickling them while they shriek with laughter and glee. Once more, Lance's eyes fall to mine. He gives me his wonderful smile that is reserved only for me, and I know my feelings for him will never cease. My happiness was with him and our kids; seeing the girls play with him was mind-blowing.

After the girls were all tucked in bed that night and Joseph was down for the count, Lance and I made love on the couch three more times. He would shove his entire length within as he came, and three weeks later, I called him with news.

"Hey, Sophie," he answers the phone on the third ring.

"Hey, honey. Joseph isn't here," I say. "What are you doing?"

"Sitting at home with Meredith," he says.

"Oh. Well . . . Lance, I'm pregnant," I say, and I can hear the smile in his voice.

"Really? Congratulations, dear." he says. "Congratulations."

"We're going to have another baby, Lance." I say, and he laughs happily.

"That's great news. I'm so happy," he says. "I was really hoping for it."

"Is Meredith around?" I ask.

"She went into the other room for a minute," he says quietly. "I'm about to break my own news to her. My . . . divorce papers are in order."

"Oh. Congratulations," I giggle.

"I need to see you. Soon," he moans into the phone. We'll be coming up this weekend . . . maybe it would be possible for you and I to sneak away . . . I'd settle for a kiss. For now."

"I miss you," I say.

"I miss you, too. I've gotta go. Congratulations, again. I'm so happy," he says.

"Goodbye, Lance. I'll see you soon. Call me later," I say. He hangs up, and I put my phone down on the table and let out a deep breath.

My own divorce papers were on the table as well. The next few months were going to be very hectic.