When Becky Met Bryan

Becky felt something go 'click'.

And that was it. That was how she knew. Bryan was the one, the father of her children. Despite herself, she was going to marry him. It was almost as though the decision had been made for her, as though her body had just gone 'yep'. Becky squeezed his hand and felt the urge to put it between her legs so he could feel how wet she had suddenly become. But she didn't, of course. Becky kept her eyes front and listened to the young guy's story, even asking a question while the rest of her marvelled at how such a profound moment could be so unassuming at the same time.

When the story was finished, the conversation turned to something else. Bryan was approached by another guy with a question--clearly this was a good time to catch him--and Becky found herself talking with his partner, Eric. It was almost as if everyone knew that she was, in some sense, already Bryan's wife. She felt like an actress being offered a part she didn't want, only to find that it really suited her. And when Bryan asked if she was ready to go home, she knew without asking that he meant his place.

Bryan had left his car at home, so they rode in a taxi. They sat in the back seat, Becky leaning against Bryan as he laid his cheek on top of her head, their arms around each other. For the longest time, they just sat in silence, watching the streetlights flash by.

'Everyone is really impressed with you,' said Bryan. 'Including me.'

Becky let out a sigh. Part of her wanted details, but another part didn't want to talk at all. She was aching to be naked with him, to tell him what happened and then have him make love to her, to get this damn taxi ride over and done with. She felt Bryan's head lift from hers and her heart sank. Any second now, he would say, 'Are you okay?' or 'Is something wrong?' and then she would have to talk and Becky didn't want to say anything.

But that didn't happen.

What happened was that Bryan drew Becky closer, kissed the side of her head and settled back in the seat with her. Becky felt a surge of emotion and she clung to the man, holding him fiercely like she'd never let him go. Her throat was tight and tears ran down her face. She'd had no idea how much she wanted to be with a man who knew when not to talk, largely because she had never experienced it before, never even knew it was a thing, but the moment she realised Bryan had understood this without saying a word, it felt as precious to her as a waterfall of diamonds.

'I love you, Bryan,' she said.

There was a pause.

'I love you too, Becky.'

Becky's chest tightened. Fuck it, she couldn't wait. She lifted herself up and climbed on Bryan's lap, straddling him so that they faced one another. She knew the taxi driver could see this in the rear-view mirror and she didn't give a shit. She looked at Bryan's face and even in the faint light, she could see the wonder in his eyes. It made her feel like she was the most beautiful woman in Creation. Becky took his face in her hands and she felt his hands cover the cheeks of her bottom. She smiled and leaned close.

'Yes,' she said.

'Yes, what?' said Bryan.

'Yes, I'll marry you. Yes, I'll have your children. Yes, I'll be your wife.'

Becky watched the man's expression. It was like watching a movie, beginning with disbelief, followed by comprehension, then amazement, then doubt, then realisation, then wonder, then joy, then confusion. Becky smiled, a big, bright smile, full of teeth and mischief.

'My god, you have an expressive face,' she said.

'I'm absolutely gobsmacked.'

'I can tell.'

'Becky, I...'

He trailed off, still not knowing what to say. Then an inner voice said, 'For fuck's sake, kiss her!' and he did. The man and the woman snogged in the back seat of the taxi like teenagers and words didn't matter anymore.

***

There was a lot of sex in Bryan's apartment that night. But it was a particular kind of sex. Somehow, Becky felt free to surrender her body to a man more deeply than ever before. All those lists in her head about what a woman should want were thrown out the window, and underneath it all was a very simple need--to be fucked into oblivion by the man chosen to be her man.

Afterwards, both Becky and Bryan lay on their backs, holding hands and staring up at the ceiling. Becky felt as though she were floating in the air and looking down. She couldn't speak, couldn't think, couldn't even formulate words in her head. She had never had a fuck like this before, not ever. She felt like she had been exploded into a million pieces and yet strangely, paradoxically, she had never felt more whole in her life.

Minutes passed.

Becky began to feel ready to reconnect. She squeezed Bryan's hand. She felt him return the squeeze. They lay quietly breathing for a while. Both of them felt the urge to say something and both decided not to. What was there to say? "That was great"? Everything that could be said felt banal, cheapening. In the end, Becky said:

'When can I move in?'

'Whenever you like.'

'I need to give two months' notice on my room.'

'Of course.'

'But I can still live here meanwhile.'

Bryan smiled and squeezed her hand. There was a silence.

'Bryan...' said Becky hesitantly. 'When do you think you'll want to start a family?'

'It depends,' said Bryan. 'Rationally speaking, I'd like my business loan paid off and for us to be in a position to buy a house before we start trying. That would be maybe three to five years. But emotionally speaking... I'm ready when you are.'

'Be careful saying shit like that. I'm not exactly in a rational space right now.'

'You think I picked you for your rationality?'

Becky laughed and gave Bryan's hand a feeble dig with her fingernails.

'I hate to burst your bubble, Mr Sandford,' she said, 'but I picked you.'

'You initiated the sex that first night,' said Bryan, turning his head to look at her. 'But I initiated the marriage.'

Becky looked at the man. His expression was soft, even loving, but he also knew his own mind. If they ever disagreed on something, he would be a tough opponent. Becky reached across and touched his face.

'You're right,' she said. 'And I still think you're nuts, by the way.'

'If this is nuts, I don't want to be sane.'

Bryan kissed her. Becky's arm went around the back of his neck as they kissed. Then they paused and looked at each other.

'Bryan?'

'Yes?'

'Do you really think we're going to live happily ever after?'

'I have no idea. But I do know one thing.'

'What's that?'

'Life with you is not going to be dull!'