Young House Wife

My name is Anita Singh. I live in a small town of Uttar Pradesh. Presently I am 32 years of age, married. I got married at the age of 25 to Rajesh, who was a shop-owner. My married life started smooth and I was happy with everything. Rajesh and I shared a very good and close relation. My sex life also was quite regular and satisfactory. But bitterness in my life started when Rajesh and I decided we are going to have an issue after two years of our marriage. When even after one year of unprotected copulation I was not getting pregnant, we were very concerned. There was pressure from my in laws also. I was really confused why this was happening. I had my periods regularly and physically also I had a very developed figure from my teenage itself. I never thought that I could land up in such a problem!

I was 27 years then, had a somewhat fair complexion, 5 feet 2 inches height, oval face, and amply built. As I said I had a developed figure from my teens with 32 breast size and flaring hips from my college days. I was conscious about my diet so that I do not add additional flesh on my hips. I always got a good male attention on road or at any gathering, which I could sense, though I was pretty conservative in dressing. In that sense I was very shy regarding these matters, which was really due to my upbringing and the small town we lived in. I was adequately gifted by god at proper places in my body though with somewhat heavy bottoms. I was pretty active and fit with regular menses.

Rajesh took me to a number of doctors. I was very shy initially though we went to female gynecologists. But I felt very embarrassed in that process of examination where each time I had to open my sari, salwar kamiz, or whatever I was wearing and even pull down my panty. To tell honestly I had a real turn on when the doctor touched my private organs for examining purpose, though she was a female I got triggered she was actually examined my breasts or nipples or my hairy pussy. I instantly got wetness down there and it reflected very apparently on my panty, which was rather uncomfortable for me. The doctors gave medicines and asked for lab tests, but there was no result.

Rajesh then took me to the city doctor, but I made him very clear that I would go for a checkup only to a lady doctor. But all those resulted in nothing positive. My mother-in-law took me to homeopaths, who also could not yield any result for me. The relation between Rajesh and me was also getting bitter. At the same time I realized I was not at all getting any sexual pleasure out of copulation, rather it seemed to be an exercise to achieve something. Days went by and I did not even realize that another year was gone! I was 28 years by then. I remained so depressed all day and had a real hard time.

Then one day Rajesh told me that he has decided to go to a male gynecologist who is an expert in infertility cases in the city again. I was really very rigid about not going to the male gynecologist out of my shyness. I think any normal lady would avoid that because the fact remains you have to expose your breasts and pussy in front of a male, may it be for examination purpose. So I was really rigid on my stand about avoiding a male doctor and before this could land up in a harsh confrontation between my husband and me, one of my neighbors, Meera, had a proposal to my mother-in-law.

If I can quote my neighbor's words to my mother-in-law, "Aunty-ji, you have tried so many doctors for Anita, but you did not get any result. Anita told she even went to the city for a checkup. You applied homeopath also, but she is not yet blessed with a child. Look at her; she looks so depressed all day. Why don't you take Anita to Rampur to Guru-ji's ashram Aunty-ji? Two of my relatives got result; they were childless for 4-5 years. They went to him, took "diksha" and his herbal medications changed their lives. And our Anita is only married for three years! Before her case goes too worse, you make a visit to Guru-ji, as he can do miracles."

Its not that we had not heard of this sadhu-baba at Rampur, but his ashram was very far off from our town. He had cured some critical diseases and some childless cases also. I was really searching a way to avoid this male doctor checkup and at the same time a hope to get a child made me readily jump into this proposal. My mother-in-law also convinced my husband by saying, "Rajesh, I think what Meera says makes sense. Since we have tried some doctors and tests were all normal, lets not waste more time on that right now. These sadhu-babas really can do miracles and as Meera was saying the herbal medicines worked for his relatives who were childless for 5 years."

In my mind I was so thankful to Meera for her timely idea. At that point I was indeed trying my best to avoid probing my body by a male gynecologist, but little could I guess that this ashram visit would actually be a shameful remembrance for me lifelong. The way I was exploited in the name of "diksha", in the name of "treatment", and in the name of "jagya" makes me feel so ashamed even today, after so many years. I was exploited so very cleverly and emphatically at every level and my desire to get a child was so high that I allowed everything crossing every limit of decency and modesty.

It was one week stay in the ashram of Guru-ji at Rampur and within that period I had to allow at least half a dozen males to enjoy my 28-year-old fully matured figure from all angles – seeing, touching, examining, groping, squeezing, and all one can think of except fucking, because that crowning was done by Guru-ji himself! I had to shed all my shyness and was virtually treated like a slut during my treatment under Guru-ji. I am really amazed when I look back at those seven days about how I allowed all that! Probably Guru-ji's mesmerizing personality and my eventual desire to get the child at all cost made me act such lewdly from a shy modest housewife Rampur. Guru-ji's ashram was situated here, a small village, which was surrounded by mountains on all the sides. There was a big pond with very clear water just beside the ashram, which made it like a heaven with cool breeze blowing and there was absolutely no signs of pollution. My mother-in-law came with me. Rajesh ultimately was not able to make it with me, my mother-in-law took me there. There was a substantial crowd waiting for darshan of Guru-ji. We had made an appointment so that we could talk privately to him regarding my problem. I was a quite afraid seeing Guru-ji, who was hugely built, almost 6 feet in height with a stout figure. He was wearing a saffron dress and his voice was calm and reverberating. A feeling of obedience would automatically come seeing and listening to this man.

My mother-in-law narrated about my purpose of visit and Guru-ji listened to it very intently. There were two more persons who were his disciples probably in that room apart from me, my mother-in-law and Guru-ji. One of them was taking some notes as my mother-in-law was detailing my problem.

Guru-ji: Mata-ji, I am glad that you have brought your bahu to me regarding this problem. I want to make one thing very clear that I cannot do miracles, but if she takes 'diksha' under me and performs what I suggest faithfully, she would not return with empty hands. Mata-ji, the treatment path is not easy in these cases and if your bahu can walk on that path, there is no reason why she would not have a child in a year's time. Of course, provided after the treatment, she meets with her husband on my suggested days.

The words were so convincing that I was more than eager to take 'diksha' under him and start the 'treatment' at that very moment. My mother-in-law also expressed the same to Guru-ji.

Guru-ji: Mata-ji, before you agree you should first know my norms. I do not keep any devotee in darkness. There are three stages in achieving the coveted goal of being a mother here. They are 'diksha', 'herbal treatment' and 'jagya'. Your bahu has to stay here for five days at a stretch to complete the diksha and the herbal treatment starting from a full moon night. If I feel that is enough to attain the goal, she might leave on the sixth day, but if a 'jagya' is required depending on her case, she would have to stay for another two days making it 7 continuous days. She has to abide by my ashram rules, which my disciple will tell you.

We were listening to his mesmeric voice and I must say it had some hypnotic effect. I did not see any offensive norms in what he said and so was my mother-in-law and I gave the nod to take 'diskha' and do the 'treatment' under him.

Guru-ji: Sanjeev, please note down her personal details before proceeding and let her know in details about ashram rules and regulations. Beti, you go with him to the next room. Mata-ji, you can ask me if you have any other questions and concerns other than this issue.

I alighted from the ground and followed Guru-ji's disciple, Sanjeev. We went to the adjacent room and he asked me to sit to the couch that was there in that room. He remained standing. He was around my age only, around 35-40 years with an average body and a calm, smiling face.

Sanjeev: Madam, my name is Sanjeev. You just don't worry since you have come to Guru-ji. I have seen several women who benefitted from his unique and very special treatment. But you have to obey it completely as he says.

I said, "Yes of course. I will definitely try to do that. I have been suffering for this now almost three years."

Sanjeev: Don't worry Madam. Let me now tell you about what you have to do. You will appear here next Monday afternoon before 7:00 p.m. That day is a full moon night, so you will have 'diksha'. Madam, please do not bring your sari etc. as our ashram has a dress code and you will be given saris, which are specially washed with herbal detergents, and also Madam, no ornaments are allowed here. Actually speaking we offer everything here, so there is no need to bring anything.

I was a bit puzzled about the "sari" part, as I have not seen any woman in the ashram till then. He just mentioned about wearing the saffron sari, but what about blouse and petticoat. I cannot just wear a sari. Sanjeev probably understood what I was wondering.

Sanjeev: Madam, you must have noticed that Guru-ji told me to note your "personal details", so you do not worry about blouse etc. In our ashram we provide everything staring from hair clip to slippers.

He laughed a little and I also was relieved. Still I was wondering about my undergarments; will the ashram provide that also I was puzzled Sanjeev: Madam, please answer to my questions honestly. And Madam one thing please do not feel shy here and don't be introvert because you have come here for a goal and we are just here to make you achieve that.

I felt very confident hearing Sanjeev's words, otherwise was a bit nervous.

Sanjeev: Do you have regular periods Madam?

Me: Yes, very rarely do I miss.

Sanjeev: When did you last have an irregular period?

Me: Three to four months back may be. I took some medicine and cleared it.

Sanjeev: What's your approximate period date Madam?

Me: 22nd or 23rd of a month.

Sanjeev was noting down as I was answering. So he was not in direct eye contact with me, so I was finding it easy to answer such personal questions. Otherwise I have never talked about these to anyone except to the doctors I visited.

Sanjeev: Madam do you have heavy periods or moderate? Do you feel any additional pain, discomfort other than the normal?

Me: Moderate, 2-3 days. No, normal.

Sanjeev: Okay Madam, rest of the more intimate details will be taken up by Guru-ji when you will be in the ashram.

I was a bit comfortable hearing that though was thinking on what "intimate details" would the Guru-ji take from me. Sanjeev continued the conversation and I almost stammered answering his next question feeling very shy sharing this sort of information to an unknown male.

Sanjeev: Madam, now about ashram dress code. We will give you four herbal washed saffron saris for your seven-day stay. Generally I have seen that is sufficient, but we do have additional also if needed. What is the size that your wear? I mean blouse...

Me: Err, I mean why do you need that?

I knew that was foolish to ask, but it came out just spontaneous and went into a more uncomfortable conversation.

Sanjeev: Madam, in our ashram we provide sari, blouse and petticoat to the women who come for 'diskha' and 'treatment'. So for that only I need the size.

Me: Okay, its 32.

I noticed Sanjeev noted the figure and looked for a second directly at my erect boobs under the cover of my blouse and sari as if trying to measure the 32 size through his eyes.

Sanjeev: Madam, since mostly the women who come for 'diksha' to Guru-ji are from rural areas and as you also know many of them do not wear any undergarment, we have no provision for that. But since you are coming from the town, please carry your undergarments, but remember to get it sterilized here herbally, as you are not allowed to wear anything, which is nonsterile after 'diksha'.

I nodded with a smiling face and was a lot relieved hearing this.

Sanjeev: Thanks Madam. You can leave now and appear here on Monday afternoon. .

I returned with my mother-in-law who sounded very optimistic about the Guru-ji as she had a talk while I was in the other room with Sanjeev and she assured me not to get tensed being there alone, but to faithfully obey Guru-ji as he instructs. I was happy overall, but little could I anticipate what was in store for me in those seven days in the ashram. Next Monday, I went out with my mother-in-law again for Rampur to Guru-ji's ashram. In my bag I practically took nothing, as Guru-ji's disciple Sanjeev told that everything would be available there, except for a spare set of clothing including a sari, blouse and petticoat and some money for emergency purpose. I took two sets of my undergarments and one set I was already wearing and thought that it would be enough for seven days.

Sanjeev greeted us with smiling faces. We went to Guru-ji and he gave ashirwad to both of us and after some general talks, my mother-in-law went back and I was all alone in the ashram with Guru-ji and his disciples. Today I saw two more disciples apart from Sanjeev and another one I had met the other day.

Guru-ji: Beti, be comfortable here. Can I call you by name?

Me: Certainly Guru-ji.

I was feeling a bit uncomfortable in front of five males, as I was the only woman there. They were all looking at me. I was wearing a light colored cotton sari with matching blouse. Though my breasts were erect as usual through my blouse and sari pallu, I noticed none were looking at that as most males do when they first meet me. Finally looking at Guru-ji's calm eyes and listening to his soothing voice, I was getting normal and comfortable.

Guru-ji: Okay Anita, let me introduce you to the members of my ashram. Sanjeev you have already met, the other ones are Rajkamal, Nirmal, and Uday. During the time of 'diksha' Sanjeev will guide you and others will help you during the 'treatment' in different phases, which I will tell you clearly later. Now you take rest and I will meet you at 10:00 p.m. for 'diksha'. Sanjeev will steer you through.

Sanjeev: Please come Madam.

We went to a cozy small room, which Sanjeev referred to as 'my room' with an attached toilet, where I found a very large mirror, where one can see almost the full figure, which seemed quite unusual to me, as we generally have small mirrors in bathrooms. There was also a clean white towel, soaps, toothpaste, etc. nicely kept as is in a hotel. In the room there was a cot, a dressing table with comb, hair-clips, sindoor, bindi, etc., a chair and a cupboard in that room. Sanjeev gave me a cup of milk and some snacks to eat.

Sanjeev: Madam, you take rest and let me know if you need anything extra apart from what is available here. Then after an hour I will come and take you for 'diksha', which is actually the sterilization process of your mind and body. That is the starting point of your journey to reach your goal Madam. By the way, if you can hand over your bag as I will check and allow only those as per ashram rules to be kept along with you.

I was a bit taken aback by the last part of his words, especially "I will check".

Me: I have brought nothing as you said. Sanjeev: But still Madam, I have to check. Don't be shy here. I will be with you throughout your stay here.

He took my bag without waiting for my permission. He took out the money-purse from it. Then he took out the couple of white brassieres that I have brought with me and put them on the bed. I was looking at the floor in utter shyness that an unfamiliar male was handling my inner wears. Now he took out a blue panty and waited sometime and held it in the air as if he was trying to guess how that little thing can hold my pumpkin like ass. Thankfully he did not look at me and then took out some handkerchieves, and the spare sari, blouse and the petticoat that I had brought. Finally he took out one last item, my white panty, and put that on bed too.

Sanjeev: Okay Madam, so I will take your extra sari, blouse, and petticoat and keep that in office as you are not allowed to wear outside clothing. I will give you the ashram sari, blouse, and petticoat when you will go for 'diksha' and also a nightdress for sleeping. Also I am taking your inner wears for sterilization and will return you tomorrow morning.

I had nothing to say, but to nod my head. He took my undergarments and again he stopped a bit on my panty. It was so awkward for me. Then came the bumper question from him, which turned me red instantly.

Sanjeev: Madam, I will also need your err.. I mean your bra that you are wearing right now for sterilization purpose.

Me: But, how can I give it right now... I stammered.

Sanjeev: Madam, I will have to prepare the boiling herbal solution for washing and it takes a lot of time doing that. So I was asking you to hand me over, it would save time and labour for me.

He was saying in such a cool voice as if it's so normal. I had really no reasoning for this and had no other alternative, but to hand over my bra and panty to him. For once it did not struck me that I will have to remain without my undergarments till the next morning, as Sanjeev said he would return them next morning after sterilization, and all these males in the ashram would know that very well and its not that I will remain all along in my room, I will have to go for 'diksha' and would have to move around in front of male eyes without my bra on, which would automatically be a sexy exhibition for any male.

Me: Okay then, if you can come after sometime, I shall hand it over. Sanjeev: Don't worry Madam, I will just wait here. How much time will it take to...

He deliberately did not finish as it was very apparent what he tried to say Me: Okay, as you wish.

Saying that I went inside the toilet. Sanjeev waited in the room. I noticed that the toilet door was more of a half door leaving a gap at the top. Soon I realized why it is like that because there was not a single hook in the bathroom to keep clothes. One has to keep on the door top, that's why the gap is left there. But soon I also realized that Sanjeev was there in the room and he would see the clothes that I keep on the door from within the room. So he will clearly have an idea to what extent I was undressed in the toilet as I keep the clothes on the door. My ears were getting hot at this thought, but also considered that I must be thinking a bit too much, as they are after all devotee and lead a sage life.

I faced the door and started opening my sari and quickly unwrapped it from my body. I kept it on the door top and then started to open the knot of my white petticoat and had to wriggle a bit as it was sticking to my fleshy bottom. There was a large mirror in the bathroom, as I said earlier, and I saw that my panty was displaying more than covering my large ass cheeks. This was a problem with me, I tried several brands, but unfortunately every panty that I wear automatically shrinks towards my ass crack and cover practically nothing of my buttocks. I was truly looking very obscene like that with my blouse on and panty squeezing in my ass crack. Hence I quickly got out of my panty and was about to keep it on the door top, but the very thought that Sanjeev must have noticed my sari and petticoat hanging on the door made me change my mind, as if he sees my panty there, it would be very apparent that I am now naked. Hence I kept it on the dry portion of the floor and started unbuttoning my blouse and bra to get completely naked.