All Comments on 'A Boy Stumbled Through The Snow'

Hot descriptions and a nice flow to the entire story. I like the way both main characters had weaknesses, and the theme of music was interwoven through the story.

Some grammatical/spelling bits could be fixed, but that's secondary to the fact that you wrote an awesome story. Keep up the great work!

this has to be by far the best of all stories i ever read on here... i loved it, simply great!

i love the way it progressed, and the detailled descriptions of the characters... simply amazing how you managed to portray them.

i loved . it was amazing story it made me cry a lot, i loved it. bravo lol your an awsum wrighter.

That was beautiful the inspiration of the story has made me want to go and fall into the snow myself and find my Will to look after and love me

Nice work with the characterization and the build-up of the love story, but the spelling is atrocious and the grammar and punctuation leave a great deal to be desired. Also the culminating love scene was too rushed. Keep writing, though!

...but I knocked off some points for typos and for blatantly nicking my idea (there are a lot of echoes of the first three pages of A Boy Who Came In From The Cold in here, and even the title is ripped off, as a couple of other people have already noticed) Although, in your favour, you did write it very nicely. *blows a kiss*

I thought it was a bit Mills & Boon though in the sense that everything happened so quickly. Logan seemed too trusting and too innocent to have been a prostitute for so long and Will's friends were all very convenient and obliging. But I liked the love scene and the line about the day starting early because the Sun was jealous. That made me smile.

extremely romantic and sweet. the spelling and grammatical errors were distracting, but not enough so that it takes away from the story. nice work!

loved it!, so sweet and loving. Defentlly a good read on a rainy day, hell.. any day!

Centimental and romantic,almost feminine writing. Keep up the good work and revise your texts after your writer's passion of expressing subsides,(if ever). Very good story!If it only could happen to me...

What a story,there are good people in this world,but you wont find many,but i had to read it all thank you avayanox

Icould not stop thinking of what the next page was going to bring. Iloved that it is so romantic. I just loved the whole story. Thank you

will would only pass on his genetic disease if he had kids with a carrier of that gene. both of his parents must have been carriers for it.

You should do a sequel a chapter about dirk finding logan a chapter about chris trying to woo logan and another about logans parents. this story is to amazing to jus end it with one chapter

babe is what my boyfriend and i call each other.. he's an artist.. and i am musically talented.. and we're 8 years apart.. :) It's just that, i'm not yet legal.. and i did not sell my body.. hahah..

Loved it~!!!! You should (if you could) make more chapters!!! This story is just to good to end it like this!!! I hate clif hangers!!! LOL good no ... Awesome story !!!! Like I said -Loved It~!!! <3

If you're not a writer as you said you were in your story. You should be. I couldn't stop reading your story until I finished it. But really you have to continue this story. I want to know what happens to you both. Will you both be happy with each other after your making love session. I want to hear about when you make love to him and he is on his back and you're facing each other. Thats when you realize that you are truly in love. Thank you so much for this story.

Eaglejeagle

this story was so romantic and sweet. i almost cried you should write another one. hell make, a whole series.

Nice sweet story

This is such a sweet story, it's well-written and I love how they fall in love. The story gets a little too predictable after they tell each other the feelings they have for the other, but other than that its very good.

wow...could this story be any more sappy?

Yes, it may be a bit sappy and predictable, but who cares? This is a story of beauty and giving in a world where there is too little of either. My thanks to the author for giving me a "feel good after" read. Made my day a lot brighter.

Will wanted Children... maybe they should adopt a child and maybe a little bit of jealousy problem (Chris) in the next chapter...

I think it was a wonderful story! And for thoes who think it is too sappy, get bent. Thats why it is called "Gay Romance". Keep up the great work and dont change your writing style for anyone. :)

Isn't this just " A boy who came in from the cold " with different wording and different names?

Although the title could have used a little more work and there were a few mistakes but overall, this is an amazing story i really loved the way you blended their lives together as soon as Logan became concious in the bathroom.

logan is smooth.? but will for all new was a monkey.? so he was taller but was he hairy or smooth...fuck knows.? some spelling was off words jumbled .......i thought it dull and lacking in certain areas.? ...however you did better than i could have.... its a pity you didnt keep going will this ... there is for a change a decent story.... most of the stories on here are fuck fuck fuck ....i find them dull and boring..... ive had my moan but you have a talent then i find in over writers (lacking.)... good for you ...keep it up... x x x x x x

I enjoyed the story. The characters were good and the story itself was a good one.

The flow of the story was, for the most part, smooth. There were quite a few spelling errors that threw me off-track for a while. (Pseudo, not sudo. Metal, not mettle. Etc.) All in all, an extremely pleasant story.

One of the good stories to read.

This kind of story has the potential to actually be published! What a capturing tale--I'd love to know more about the characters and read more about them, should you ever make a sequel. Great work!

you write great and its wonderful that Logan went through so much yet he never let it affect him where it really matters, he was able to go on with his life and make it a success the first opportunity he got. Will is a fighter too and reminds us that life is worth living despite everything. i love the story.

although shit, some of the spelling errors really turned me off. Seriously, it is "finally" not "ficanally" and it is "lyrics" not lierics. There were many more errors, and they were just so jarring. Just spellcheck next time, okay?

It was still a hot story.

You've had a lot of positive comments here, so I'm just going to be honest. I think you need to spend a lot more time reading. People are enjoying your story because they're rewriting it for themselves in their heads - the story as you tell is actually really bad storytelling. Sorry.

Romantic !!!!

it felt rushed, timewise. If you had give say a month or two between Will bringing Logan home and Logan beginning to believe that Will actually isn't being kind to just use him, it would have been more realistic. Logan has years of trust issues so changing in like a day to trust in Will should never have happened (in my opinion). The parts involving the music was rushed as well. Maybe the meeting should've taken a few weeks for Chris' schedule to open up rather than him being available for dinner the very same day Logan decided he did want to be a musician and Will calling his publisher friend's wife to get in touch with Chris.

Please remember that no one is paying to read these free stories on literotica nor are the writers getting paid to have their works published on this website so why be so nasty when commenting?

I totally enjoyed the story. Thank you for sharing it with us.

It was quite amazing the intimacy, the understanding, the compassion and the loving care between these two guys.

I was a little afraid that Logan would leave Will, having been so hurt in his life, maybe he would have hardened his heart ... thank goodness it was not to be, and he fell for Will ! I'm so glad they really found each other - and cured one another of so many ailments ... Very good story, that left me with a warm toasty feeling inside ! :))

Would love to know what happened to Logan's music career and whether Will and Logan are still together, perhaps married.

I appreciate that these two didn't really have sex until the last few paragraphs. I like stories that are 90% plot and 10% sex. This one was probably 95/5 but that's fine.

I'm sure Will had other ideas when he rescued Logan in the park, but the humanity and decency sides of Will won over raw sex. Thank you! Will really had to play it cool to get Logan's trust. This story will make it to my favorites list.

I love the way your story flowed, it interaction between Will and Logan is great

I am in a similar relationship, except he plays the Sax! He is 23 years younger, I am 70 ad we are getting married May 30th, 2018!!!

Will, a genetic defective, reaches out to a dying prostitute and with love raises him.

What a stunning story.

Full of emotion, compassion and love it held me enthralled from the first word to the last.

Thank you Avayanox for creating and sharing such a wonderful experience.

I think I started this story a long time ago but got distracted. It’s lovely and a pleasure to read. There are so many cynical stories out there. This sweet story was so marvelous and charming and I just love it.