by virtualatheist
and do bring excitement and romance into married lifes. TK U MLJ LV NV
A loving couple playing. One question. Did the friend not know her husband? Actually, these are the type of friends you go out and chest with.
Just saying...
Whether the friend new Bob or not is ambiguous I know. I was aiming for the friend knowing... R-read her reaction when she watches Christina head for the dance floor.
But even if she didn't, I think it still works.
Of course I guessed it might go the way it did but it was nicely written, no give aways.
This couple got it right. If you are looking to spice up your love life, do it with your partner.
I was tricked but happily surprised. It's good to read about a real loving husband and wife. If every couple did things like this or tried to keep trying new stuff with their spouses than these stories would read more like this one and not like the majority of the stories how one gets swept off their feet and are doing new positions in risky places with someone they just met or work with. Keep up with stories like this , it's nice to read
I've read several stories here with this same plot, but you executed it well. In the realm of erotica, it's extremely difficult to devise a plot that hasn't been written many times before.
You got me. I was beginning to get upset with the wife. A loving marriage is nothing to take lightly. Sometimes we need to remember that life gets into a rut . Then we have to show those we love that there still desirable to us or trouble can begin.
We were going along, thinking that somehow this "faithful wife" was being seduced by a stranger, and a the unthinkable adulterous night of infidelity unfolds. Waking up in the morning with a man in the shower, terrified of what she was going to tell her husband, and her husband was there all the time. Kind of weird but enjoyable.
However, you desperately need to do more diligence on proofreading or get someone to do it for you. Several spelling problems and word usage problems. Thus I gave it 4 *'s on the erection meter.
But you turned into a loving wife story , that was a twist , having me fooled for awhile.
I WAS FEELING SAD FOR HER HUSBAND THEM POW RIGHT IN THE ASS, DAMM GOOD STORY . A 5
This is all about true marriage and love...A good and real LW and LH story...
another fine, new LW writer. I saw the ending coming, but then the author put enough doubt in my mind that I was not certain what was going to happen. I thought I was going to need to trot out one of my various criticisms of girls' nights out. Glad I didn't have to do that.
A good story for a first timer (unless you've been here by another handle). I was all set to BTB. Actually a little disappointed. LOL! Only a couple of typos. I detect maybe Aussie? Cheers!
but you know this has been done here before. Your point was to seduce the reader, which you did. But only because we trusted you. Following stories will now be read with more cynicism. Looking forward to future offerings.
What can I say, I'm a sucker for happily married stories.
Constance was aghast as she looked at them dancing. Does her good friend not recognize Sweetie's Hubby? And they never checked in (or out) with her WingGirl and ride! Plus, the 'seduction' was pretty trivial.
3*
can quickly turn to reality if not guarded carefully.
take care.
Role playing is fine, but the reader may feel cheated to find out he was out of the loop.
Good stroke story
You must not be a total atheist since your characters speak to Jesus and God and have "biblical orgasms" !!!!!
You had me. I admit it. There wasn't anything until the very end that indicated anything other than a foolish wife making a terrible mistake. In fact I sort of got pissed because we were so close to the end I figured she was either a serial pig or you were going to dump a 'to be continued' on us.
Yeah you got me. Loved it. Have a five.
Keep writing.
Sucked me right in. what a nice surprise ending Great sex to.. your very good in the details. Thank you
....your tale drew me in and I was becoming increasingly outraged at Christina's increasingly stupid choices......then you turned the tables and got us good!
You get 5* just for pulling off a convincing (but awful) story about a woman's sexual demise, then showed us that it was and extensive play between she and her husband.
Admittedly not a new story idea, but so well played off.
Though a popular plot line your writing was well paced, fun and easy to read. Please keep writing I'm sure the story depth will grow as you go
Really enjoyed your story. Very erotic and well written. Nice ending.
Well paced and written a very good first story in this section. Although this plot has been well used I enjoyed your writing style the pace and the dialogue please write another one in LW I'm sure your story plots will deepen as you add to your story library
.... it's not entirely original but, nevertheless, it was a good tale well told as it wasn't obvious that this was a 'role-play' type story until the end. Sorry to see that you've had some negative comments, it doesn't really encourage anyone to keep going and write more. I understand how much effort goes into writing so try to ignore crass derogatory, one line, critiques. If you click on most of the 'identified' harsh responses I think you'll find a lot of them haven't submitted any of their own stories at all (like myself), so the answer to unhelpful, negative, rude comments is 'put up or shut up', ha ha ha..... and the anonymous, derogatory, responses don't even need to be considered as most of them are haters in some form. So, keep on, 'keeping on' and see how you go. Best of luck for your future efforts, Regards, Mike.
* * * * *
:)
Very funny. Sounds like a love affair to me. Well done.
You had both my wife and I, together we thought the wife was going to slip and have an affair and as typical of most stories here, the couple ends in divorce. Wow, what a change, I am glad to see an author that can write as good as you do, yet change things around and give us a warm story that truly shows a couple in love spicing up their marriage anyway they can. We also loved how you wrote the friends were all in this together. 5 stars should be a 10
Usually, I can guess the ending of a story with very little effort. No one surprises me....until now. Great story. 5 stars.
Nice one... took me by surprise... I had to read the last five paragraphs thrice to be sure.
a great story with two normal married folks creating their own fun.
but the author threw me off track with her friend having "...a nonplussed expression..." when Christina got up to dance with Allen.
. . . as story but well executed. It is possible for each half of a couple to step from routine to excitement. VA has shown one good way. Pretty good job of storytelling Virtualatheist.
when both parties go into it knowing what is going to happen.
This story was not about make belief between the husband and wife, rather it was an exercize in fooling the reader.
this is what you do in a marriage to break the routine of everyday life. YOU SPICE IT UP. I truly thank this author and rate it a 5 star should be rated much higher. I cannot give any positive ratings to cheaters that have lame excuses for breaking their vows, only word comes to mind is a failure as a person. This couple goes to great lengths to keep the passion fires burning. Excellent story for all married couples wondering or thinking how boring their life is. Try this sometime and watch the love return and the sparkle that was once in your life return Well done story
A married couple liven up their sex life. Well played. At the end of the day the kids will be gone and it will just be the two of them. Good to keep the home fires burning for the long run.
You kept it between man and wife. Not so usual on here. Great way to do it.
At first I wasn't crazy about the ending, but hey, that's what a story is all about... endings that you didn't expect. Beyond that, the writing was excellent; the story was excellent; hot sex; not too short and not too long for this kind of site; overall my opinion is reflected in my five star vote. Thanks for sharing.
I don't understand the negative spiteful criticism.
It was a wonderful story about a loving couple spicing up their marriage with a little role play. Wife and I do it occasionally.
It is you guys I feel sorry for. IF you are in a heterosexual relationship, it takes work to keep things spicy and with variety after the years.
Nicely done, author.
I do understand the game. I get it, I really do. However, and while the following will not pertain to everyone, such games open the door and unlock the window.
Not that big of a step or leap on my part, that the thought enters into wife's mind that if game playing adds such excitement, how much more thrill could she experience with actually cheating.
For my part, I have no need to play a game nor engage in a role to become excited about showing my wife how much I am still attracted to her-she feels the same.
A friend going through a nasty divorce showed me a story on this site that got him thinking his wife was stepping out. He had numerous stories bookmarked informing him of the signs a wife was cheating
Not sure why he showed me this one but it prompted me to comment.
Yes our lives of work and kids involve routine. But included in that routine is having fun together, conversations at mealtime and while sharing the clean-up. Retiring to bed and holding my wife while discussing the day, our plans-dreams.
True each night does not end with Olympic sex but invariably there is marathon cuddling and expressions of endearment before drifting to sleep
That is why the key is "occasionally"
There is a big problem if role playing is taking up too much time.. any kind of role play
By definition it is pretending to be what you are not. It should never be easier to do that than to be yourselves. Then there is a big problem.
If something like this story is happening each weekend for instance, then that is a good indication that they have problems.
But if in a few weeks, she is a naughty student and he is a strict teacher, awesome.
Or a few weeks after that, boss/secretary etc...
What a well written story. I absolutely loved it. The ending was a complete surprise. Your writing is very good. Please keep it up. You have uncommon talents. Easily a 5, and one of my favorites. 😊😊😊😊😊
...and here I was, mourning the fall of another good wife and mother on the road to perdition. I gotta read more from this writer. Five grateful stars..
Bought your story line virtually hook, line and sinker - got any played out gold mine shares for sale, maybe London Bridge or the Statue of Liberty?
5 Sharp Pointy Things for the plot and execution, now will you please take the hook out of my bloody mouth!
Done before by others, usually not so well but it was what I expected with his comments while she was getting ready to go out. I can also recommend the five authors listed to the right in "Similar Stories". Signed: BTW
Ok you had me, this ended very well, I really enjoyed your take on this. Very well done, the ending where she panicked was excellent.
But I do wonder why they had to do this to "spice" things up. Why not just a nice romantic weekend together as each other? She has to imagine a stranger to get the excitement back? Means something is not right.
Forgot your ending here, just as good a second time. You kept it going right up to the end.
Well you start the story in her home with her dressing and BOB her husband walks in and compliments her on her looks. Then in the bar she gets hot for ALLEN which later winds up to be her husband also, BULLSIT YOU STUPID ASS, dont dive up your day job. Your Noy a writer.
Bob is described as 5'5" to her 5'6"-- yet Allen is 6"1'. This "not-so-minor" detail, that this reader (paying attention) easily visualized, doesn't allow me to accept the ending. I wasn't surprised, I was annoyed that you tried to trick your reader.
You had me going until the last. But Bob in the beginning and Allen at the end, really, kind of ruined the story.
I was going to give you a three star I don´t know how it went to five. I liked the story except for the end. Two different men with different physics and they turn out to be the same? Was the husband having a growth spurt?
@Anonymous Re: "Taller Tale?" - Where do you see Bob is described as 5'5" to her 5'6"? Her height was given as 5'3", Bob's not at all.
\
"Bob was forgotten" - That's a cheat, she knew that Allen was Bob. It's fine to role play, but a story with a twist shouldn't lie to the readers to achieve it.
Perhaps I'm the only one who has ever role played with a partner. Part of role play is imagination, the mind is the best sex toy that there is and keeping a couples lives in AND out of bed is what keeps role play from becoming real. Thank you for your story - lot of controversy here!
somewhere east of Omaha
My husband likes these games but it's more picking up some single woman at a bar for a one night stand than any cheating fantasy. No one is going to seduce me. I am far too mature and experienced to fall for that ridiculous nonsense. And if I did, not only would I for certain lose my husband, my best friend would be ready to kick my ass. Normally, I could take her. I have before but in that situation, she would own me. Long story
You've got a few comments from people who've had the sense of humour by-pass. I thought it was clever. 5*
Cheep, Unfair with the 2 names on the husband, is he Bob Allen or Allen Bob?
Turning out to be the husband after all has been done before. Done extremely well here. I didn't see it coming.
Excellent writing, I only spotted one typo (my main hobby). It was a nice one.
Just for an instant I wondered what a hernipple is.
I downloaded two pictures that the pi had taken of my wife and Randy"""""""" When I first read this I immediately thought of 7.13 (pi). Then I realized it was supposed to be 'pie' . HEHEEH
Good ending twist. Old trope but worked out well here. The two pre-planned the seduction game with each other. The reader wss in the dark until the end.
One thing I think some writers, including this one, do in this type of stories is lie to their readers. In my opinion they shouldn't do so and one of the biggest problems is lying to the reader about what one of the married couple pretending not to be married to each other is thinking and feeling emotionally. The story would be more honest sticking to dialogue and actions.and intended to merely trick the reader.
In my opinion each of the following passages is dishonest in an attempt to trick the reader.
Christina grimaced slightly, not sure she liked the way he had invited himself to sit next to her
Christina read his expression. She had to admit that he didn't seem to be giving of the signals that she had come to expect over the years.
Christina knew it was wrong, but her passion was rising, she was falling, she knew that, falling into an abyss of desire and physical need.
Bob was forgotten
Christina's expression softened. This stranger was having an effect on her, even after just a few words
being shared. She put her misgivings to the back of her head ...
Christina wasn't terribly good at dancing, but she did enjoy it and she could see that Allen was just as bad as she was. For some reason, she found it to be quite endearing and also another clue that he was no player.
Christina was okay with the up tempo music, but less comfortable with the songs written with slow, close dancing
In her mind, she knew what she was doing was wrong. Only her husband should hold her like this,
She knew it was wrong, but she didn't want it to end.
she could feel her belly warming in spite of her misgivings.
Allen's expression betrayed his own feelings of guilt,
The combination of cocktails and her own physical excitement was battering down her defences. She knew it was wrong,