All Comments on 'A Family Controlled Ch. 04'

is your brother also your son, if not it was a waste of time. its as if you wanted to rush it and finish it off soon. A good buildup for a long story, atleast a few more chapters where he would have a big family with lot more kids with his mother, aunt and suzzy would have been good and how he held them as a family and built a good future .....

good story 5 stars

Who is the father of the baby?

If you read chapter 1 you will know who the father is. The writer says that the mother has a third child fathered by Charles.

Totally ludicrous story.

Bet the "anonymous 5 stars" giver was otakuinshiner him self!

I was hoping it would have came to five guys raping Beth and his mom, in order to get that bastard out of their life. At least, Johnny and Beth are together. Too bad he didn't get his sister again. Oh well, decent story.

Oh well it was a good story the only fault was the continuing spelling and grammar errors, but shit who gives a fuck with it when it's a good story, but it made it hard to understand what to was trying to say, but with a bit of thinking you soon got the gist of it. The reason I've been giving you a vote of five all throughout the four chapters was for the story line only. I hope you can get the expert help you need in getting an editor and proof reader for further stories that you write.

pretend this is junior high English, read the following sentences and see if you can find the errors.

"To say the next few day where awkward would be a huge understatement"

"does Suzzy got a brother complex Beth said starting to smile."

"the worst site a young man could see " (no, it does not refer to a website)

"This bitch will make up for me loosing Mia . ."

"Shit Diego is DJ's Uncle fuck. . . "

"Eric and the other guy are both doing twenty years for rape and attempted murder. As for Charles he went to prison"

and there are soooooo many more.

i like it but wished he got all the girls.and don't worry about certain people comments he said the same to everybody

yep the low life son let it go when all he ever had to do was call the cops after the first rape he discovered.

SORRY TO SEE THIS AUTHOR INACTIVE. THIS WAS A GOOD STORY. IT DEFINITELY WASN'T EDITED WELL OR AT ALL BUT AFTER I EDITED IT AND LOADED IT INTO MY TEXTALOUD, TEXT READER, WELL? IT WAS AN EXCEPTIONAL STORY! ONE WORTH MENTIONING. THANKS AUTHOR!