All Comments on 'A Gumshoe's Lament'

Needs some editing. Good concept, would love to see you expand the story in greater detail. Perhaps with a prequel from the woman's perspective on why she hates cheaters etc

4 stars

this is from way left field but i think she doesnt like cheaters because she says, "i just think about my cheating ex husband fucking his secretary".

OK, until the twist, We The Readers are thinking Sweetie (well, kinda) is the person under survellance. But NO, it is johns - whose own Sweeties have them under scrutiny. Cute ... BUT the only Sweeties involved here are totally invisible and absent. The Walking WetDream is a PseudoProsy, a HokieHooker - BaitBitch. CUTE ... but NOT EROTIC. NO Loving Wife in sight, nor any erotic action.

PLUS, since BaitBitch is the PI's confederate, why the fuck doesn't she just wear a wire? It can just record the prattle, doesn't even have to transmit. It can be in her purse or clutch. How many of the targets are paying any attention to anything except Ms WetDream? Any who are THAT paranoid are NOT likely to get busted anyway!

And, of course the PI/Narrator knows her 'modus operandi!' He PAYS her!

Sorry ... the concept is OK, it just ain't LW (or even LIT) ... NOR is it well thought-out.

Also, the word mehanics suck swamp water.

3*

Never fails. Comment on word mechanics and screw up yourself.

surveillance!

I love stories like this!

One of the men she outed came back and beat her near to death. Today she can't walk without the use of a cane and the scars on her face remind her every day of the dangers of screwing around in other people's marriages. Sorry I couldn't find any sympathy for her actions.

you sound like a murder!!! God help LIt they don't banish you, you dim witted asshole

I presume you meant the one with the "What happened after awhile?" comment, but since there are two annonys before your annony, I wanted to be sure. Given the fact you're posting an anonymous comment slamming someone who is anonymous, ya can't be sure.

<P>

All you have to do to direct your comment is COPY THE FUCKING COMMENT TITLE!

First of all, I liked this story; cute, and no waste of time.

Second, I never cease to be amazed at how fucked up some people are, especially when they consider themselves anonymous, on a site like this. Whomever posted "What happened after awhile?" is a sociopath -- at least as I, a layman, understand that term.

I do so love it how these anonymous posters seem to think that are in someway superior to other anonymous posters just because they chose a clever name to hide behind. Or maybe I'm wrong and Amyyum is her real name and CharlieB4 is his real name? Or perhaps Amy is a man and Charlie a woman I don't know as they are both as anonymous as I am.

As for this story it's well written as most of Charlie's stories are but this lacks something I'm not sure what but it's hard to care about anyone involved in honeytraps and that goes for the detective, the prostitute or either spouse.

She didn't use any coercion or physical force on her target. He made a choice to betray his wife and his marriage.

I am down with taking all cheaters out. Kind of like cleansing the earth of rotting sex zombies. Keep up the good work.

Certainly well worth the time to read. One can not really comment on it without giving too much away. In fact most of the comments here end up being spoilers.

Why would a PI who was working with the woman need to PLANT a bug in the manner described. All that was needed was for her to have it already on her in the form of, say, a piece of jewellery or the like.

Creative, unique idea; thanks for a good read!

Don't understand why your story isn't rated higher. Well written and interesting twist. And I do understand the "plant" (don't want to spoil it). No other way to NOT give it away. Good job!

If they're working together, why does he have to plant the microphone? I realize we can't know or it gives away the twist, but why even mention it?

No, it's not that we're somehow superior, but it's a lot easier to carry on a dialog if we can easily identify just who we are talking to.

Now, maybe you don't WANT a dialog, you just want to pontificate and aren't interested in contrary opinions?

Actually a fun little story to read.

Seems like this story line has been used before.

Thanks for sharing.

As anonymous number nine I have to comment on the other eight anonymous who appear not to like this story. They are idiots! They are rednecks who voted for Donald Trump! Maybe one of them is Donald Trump, lol! They are brainless! To be taken in by a honey trap you must first have that inclination. Loving husbands do not pickup strange women in bars! Any women who come on to them are politely told to leave. It is only the married sleaze bags who hit these women. I think the one anonymous was pissed off by this honey trap story. I guess he got caught in one and was divorced, lol! It looks go on you.

If you play, you pay!!!

Liked this little flash story. Good job.

Interesting angle. A bit too short.

Again for this very good short story. Great twist on the cheating wife caught by a PI story.

Nice short story. Maybe these guys who play when away will think twice!

Entrapment. Good story, but too brief.

Different bat excellent!,.

Interesting short tale that borderlands s on entrapment. Still, worth four stars.

JPB

Yeah!! Good one!! You had me heading in a different direction right from the start till the final couple of paragraphs!!!