All Comments on 'A Lesson Well Earned'

Here is another example of sick people. Just makes me want to get ahold of him and give him a little of his own punishment. Really hate dicipline freaks.

You were clear that both partners shared equally in give and take, with punishment given by her as well. If she did anything like what he did, he would certainly not be able to participate in standard hetro sex after the punishment. I guess she could go with anal play or oral in lieu if he was as sore as he was in the same area.

I liked, that while it may not have been exactly to my taste in punishment, each punishment ended with love and forgiveness. (Forgiveness may be a little overstated if he keeps increasing the punishment for he same offense), hoping that he realizes that he has little chance for behavior modification of his wife based on previous punishments and repetitions.

It wounds like a long and happy marraige and relationship.

This is a 2-way DD relationship. Perhaps the author picked a situation that is not as clear as others might be.

Suppose she asked him to help her lose weight. She needed to lost 50 pounds for her health, blood pressure, risk of cancer, heart attack. Nothing she/they have tried has worked. She says, typical of a DD, I need help. I need you to help enforce my sticking to some program where I lose the weight or I'm afraid I'll die and, concidentally, you'll lose me more surely than you could to another man. So he tries punishment and she says she understands. And then she binges. So he increases the punishment. And she understands. And she eats portions that are too big. And now she needs to lose 60 pounds. Do you recommend he use the same level of punishment that has proved to be inadequate in the past? He doesn't choose the escalation because of some sick need of his. He chooses it to do for her what she asked of him and he is willing to go farther than he might ordinarily be able to stomach because he loves her enough to help restore her to health, even though it has a personal psychological cost to him.

To the original anonymous poster: you misapprehend the nature of the relationship and the purpose of creating a DD. They define the parameters of the relationship. In the story, she could sit down with him and say she understands she is sabotaging his and their ability to move forward to financial success, but she is happy with playing very little role in the marriage (she'll barely even clean the place, preferring to stay in bed) and in not providing support to a career that enables them to have a lifestyle they have agreed upon. If he's content with that, not likely, they can stay married with those understandings. But she has expressed in this story a desire to play more of a role and to provide logistical and emotional support which she has developed a habit of failing to do. She acknowledges that failure, expresses regret and remorse and a desire to have him take action to help her overcome her lazy tendency. The only thing she disagrees with is the exact method he has chosen at the exact moment she is feeling the pain of that method. She agrees with the concept and, if it is successful, she will surely look back on it as having been the right thing to do. If you start working out and 5 minutes in your lungs start to hurt because you are badly out of shape, do you say this is too much and pack it in? Or do you push yourself, accepting the pain, so that you improve your conditioning and your health?

I would not choose to be in this kind of relationship. I believe that everyone should be responsible for themselves. But, in practice, I'm clearly wrong. Not everyone can. We don't all have the same tools. You can't say to someone who is ADD, "Just pay attention." They don't choose not to pay attention sometimes, they are not capable of paying attention all the time. Not everyone has the tools to be completely responsible for themselves all the time. If someone identifies a weakness, it is a strength that they find an adaptation that allows someone else to help overcome the problems that result from that weakness. If you can't remember to take your blood pressure medication every night, it is not a weakness to enlist a friend to call to remind you. Perhaps you have elected to remain irresponsible and just don't make the effort to remember. If both parties agree, what is wrong with the relationship? If, on the other hand, you are not capable for some reason, you have compensated for your weakness.

As I said, I would not choose to be in this kind of relationship. But I could never condemn it as being sick.

If the relationship were just about his pleasure in causing the pain, I'd find that sick. If she enjoyed the pain, it would be more murky for me. I'd like to know that she understood why she needed the pain and was content with that, rather than addressing the underlying reasons and doing something about it.

Most out of the mainstream stories fail to adequately explain the behavior and leave the rest of us just seeing it as abberant. But I shouldn't complain, most stories here are just a thin excuse to describe sexual behavior enjoyed or fantasized about by the author. It's just that most of us understand why a guy picks up a girl in a bar and why she agrees to be picked up (and that could be another guy instead of the girl) and why they go back to his place and engage in unprotected sex. It's a fantasy we intuitively understand. When you write something out of our experience, it usually doesn't work unless you can provide us with context that makes it believable.

I understood this because I've done reading on DD. One other thing here, receiving the punishment is cathartic. You know you have violated your agreement and that it has a negative effect on your partner or on both of you. That causes guilt. The punishment is a one-time event that says it addresses the specific behavior and when the punishment is over, all is forgiven and the guilt is released. If everyone had a mechanism for doing that, we'd have a lot more healthy, happy people.

I understand that this kind of relationship doesn't float everyone's boat. But let me tell you it floats my boat and sails me into paradise. To the original commenter here: I wonder what made you read the story in the first place since you don't seem to be interested in BDSM and its many facets. While I agree that the punishment was rather intense, in the context of the story it sounds like the character Brandy had fouled up on numerous occasions and within the context of the relationship most definitely deserved the punishment that she received.

While punishment is quite physically painful, you'd be surprised how wonderful it feels to know that someone cares enough about you to take care of you in such a way. Just because you don't want to live your life in this particular lifestyle doesn't mean that it's wrong, only that it's different. In fact I think I could go for a nice spanking myself, no not just a spanking, I think I'd like to be whipped with a thick leather belt...hmmm yes that sounds nice.

To the author: My apologies for your comment board being turned into a forum. I loved your story. It was truly beautiful and heart-warming.

This is the most incredable bullshit on the site. He loves her so he fucks her ass for his pleasure and her pain. If punishment is given for the pleasure of the punisher it is sadism by definition. He does NOT love her. Changing the tone from Sadism to caring and sorrowful at the end does not save this story. He's a sadist; she's a battered woman.

Frankly, my dears, if you're quite so against it, what kept you reading to the end? Or if you didn't and simply jumped straight ahead to the comment button instead, why do you feel that you're qualified to pass judgment in the first place? If this isn't your kettle of tea, I do suggest you go find something that is; it is, after all, both a free internet and a very large site. No doubt you can find something more to your taste without uselessly lambasting a perfectly good example of DD fiction. Remember that it is fiction, after all. To the author, I simply commend you for a good read and good form. Keep it up! :)

Beautifully written. Every word perfectly choosen. The angle was different, but that is just what we need nowadays.

Thank you.