A Little R&R Ch. 02

"I'd rather not bring it up right now." He tried to keep a dead-pan tone.

"That's what Reno said. Hell, if I didn't know better, I'd say you two really WERE having a lover's spat." She blew a stray hair out of her face, irritated.

Rude looked square into her face. "It's just I haven't made up my mind about some things," he spied the envelope where the bed had been, "and I don't even know where to begin... on others..."

"You sure you're gonna be okay?" she pressed. Rude slumped to the floor, knees folded to his chin, saying nothing. Elena blinked hard and stooped down in front of Rude. "Maybe you should talk to Reno."

Rude ground his teeth. "I don't..." He flexed his hands. "I don't think... that's possible... there's just too much you don't understand... about..." He looked back at the ceiling.

"Trust me when I say this: I know exactly how irritating Reno can be and how far he can push the buttons sometimes, but he just doesn't understand, sometimes, when to stop. Reno has his own motivations for everything. Reno has his own agenda for everyone; it seems, except for you. He's always protected you, you know. I am sure you can talk it out."

Rude snorted. "That's exactly what he said," he admitted, shaking his head.

"Wait... Reno gave you the option to talk? He never gives anyone the choice to talk about it. He just treats them like their opinions, feelings, or whatever don't matter. Well, unless he really doesn't care. Then he just ignores them."

"We had talked... quite a bit... never mind he was reclusive... Evasive... Weaselish..." The corner of his mouth cracked in a smile, then furrowed his brow. "And then he goes and tells me he's been spying on me." He looked Elena square to the face again. "For a whole YEAR he'd been doing that. How would you feel?!"

"Spying on you? Like how? And why?"

Rude blushed. "It's rather personal..." He got up, picked up the envelope and started rifling through for a tame photo to show. He came to one of the earlier ones, viewing him from back in the hall. "A whole year of this," he stated, tossing it to her.

Elena picked up the image. Her eyes grew wide. "Why would he do this?" Her features showed thought. "Unless he...." Her voice dropped off and she looked up at Rude, her eyes wide. "He wasn't kidding, was he? He really DID push you too far. What could he have possibly wanted to do with these? Blackmail?"

He shook his head. "There's nothing to blackmail me for with that... although some of these..." he rattled the envelope gently. "...could cause some damage."

"Why would he do that to you? He's always been so... protective." Her brow furrowed as she looked at the image. She couldn't resist a smart quip, "You DO have nice calves." She offered the picture back to Rude with a smirk.

"I think that must have something to do with why he has all of these." He snatched back the photo. "It's all giving me a migraine... and after all of this, he just wanted to weasel out of it... move on. Him, the bastard I've worked with for how long?!"

Reno hit the door of the closet, his voice loud, but muffled by the door. "I'm not DEAF, you know."

"Then come out here and TALK to him, will you?" Elena shouted, exasperated.

"I tried that, yo. Didn't work." Elena eyed Rude.

"Some effort!" his voice boomed through the area. Elena backed against the wall.

"Hey, you're the one going all angsty on me. You wanna forget about it, we'll forget about it. Nothing ever happened, Rude."

Rude got a bit louder, flushed to the face. "That's all fine for you, but what'd about me? Huh? You think swallowing any of this has been easy?"

Reno punched the door again. "You think forgetting is going to be easy?!"

The big man marched out to the hall. In a roar, he hollered, "You sure the hell act like it is!" There is a clattering in the closet as many things fell off of shelves due to Reno clamoring to his feet.

"How the hell you figure that?!"

Rude grabbed the handle and started wrenching it about. "Always hidin' your ass, I'm sick of this! You've got some nerve to just whimsy through all of this... can't even give a man two minutes to clear his head without turnin' things back to your way."

Reno threw the door open. "My way has always been what's gotten me through EVERY disappointing thing that's ever HAPPENED to me. Who the hell are you to come in and change that now??"

He glowered at Reno, gritting his teeth. "You changed all that when you brought me into all of this."

The redhead poked a finger into Rude's chest. "I gave you all night and all DAY to clear your head and when I give you the opportunity to talk, you don't do ANYTHING. Beat your head against the wall, like that helps! How many other people have I ever given the chance to talk to me about anything, Rude? I've blown off everyone but you."

Rude knocked his finger away. "Maybe I can't talk about this, maybe I need to get it straight in here first." He pointed at his head.

"That's why I'm staying AWAY. Make up my mind, man!"

"But you're being such an ass about it! Do you really think locking yourself in the supply cabinet is going to work? My GOD man..." Rude rubbed the skin of his forehead and up to the top of his head. Stalking back into his room, hefted the bunk bed with one shoulder and heaved into the space left vacant by the old bed. "Two beds, no stupid closet, no avoiding me, for crap's sake we still have our shifts to cover." He panted a little, spittle flying with each word.

"I locked myself in there to give you time alone. Space, you know? And I need... this," he gestured to the closet behind him, "somewhere I feel secure. I would go back to my room but they made that choice for me already."

"Yeah and I bet Tseng would have a coronary knowing one of his top men was making housing arrangements between the Xerox reams..." He shook his head.

"Top men. Feh." The boost to his ego placated him a bit.

Rude rolled his eyes but was only seen doing a slight head roll. "You know as well as I do that your assignment list is long for reasons beyond you slacking off. You get through shit that no one else could pass through!"

"So whaddya want, Rude?"

"I want you to stop being so chicken shit... like you are now." He breathed heavy from the sustained shouting.

"Hey, it's not that I continuously slack off, you know. My assignment list may look long, Rude, but I do just as much as everyone else here. My list is just longer because they give me more. And as for being chicken shit... fuck you."

"No... That's my line..." He gave Reno a stone-faced stare.

"How is trying to work things out being chicken shit, Rude? You want me to fight you? Is that it? Would that make it easier to accept?"

"Your idea of working things out is to hide from me." Rude snarled.

He didn't want to fight Rude, but if it was the only way to get through to him, he would do it. He couldn't stand the idea of being in this limbo between where they had been, where they were, and where they were going to be. Reno, tired of talking, rushed him. He saw Rude brace for the impact at the last second, dropped to one knee and swept at the hulk's knees. Rude fell back, landing on his shoulders.

"The fuck was that for??" He rolled to one side, hands raised to block.

"You want me, you got me. You wanna work this out, let's work it out."

Through gritted teeth, Rude barked, "Bring it on, bitch." He cracked his neck.

Reno hadn't been expecting the response he was greeted with. Rude was actually fighting him. "Well, come on, then." He wasn't going down without making it hard on him. He beckoned with two fingers. "Let's go, yo."

Rude stood, arms still held in a boxer's guard. "You want to rumble?" He raised an eyebrow. "You really askin' for this?" His weight shifted and slid a bit closer.

"If that's what it takes."

Rude took a mild swing. "Don't think I won't do it." He swung with the other fist.

Reno ducked and stepped behind him. "Rude, I'm faster than you. You got me beat in brute strength, yo, but I'm a weasel." Reno shoved against the back of his knees. Rude fell forward, his knees cracking against the floor.

"Cheap... shot?!?" He reached over his head, grabbed Reno by the waist, and flipped him over his head. Reno caught himself in a bridge and shoved himself to his feet.

"That's the way I am, isn't it?"

Rude stood up again and snarled. "If you don't quit now," he threatened, taking a step closer to Reno and nodding toward Elena, "they're gonna have to scrape you off the floor."

"At least then I wouldn't have to deal with the hole you ripped in my chest."

"You?!? YOU!?! You're the one THAT KEEPS TRYING TO LEAVE!!" His face, splotchy with anger, seethed.

"I'm NOT LEAVING NOW, AM I??" Reno rushed him again, throwing his full weight against Rude's middle. Rude returned the grappling hug, twisted to one side and used his weight and Reno's momentum to tip them both towards the floor. Reno wrapped himself clumsily around Rude, making sure the bigger man was the one to reach the ground first. Rude hit with a hefty thud and rolled so he was overtopping Reno, arms still wrapped around his partner's lanky frame. Reno wedged his knees in Rude's chest and shoved hard, trying to dislodge himself. Rude squeezed harder.

"Stoppit..... stoppit!" Rude pulled his head back a bit and head butted Reno between the eyes. He yelped in pain, his vision swimming and blinked several times, trying to open his eyes despite the watering. Rude, still holding on strong, pleaded, "Just stop it... would ya?" He was breathing hard from exertion as his sunglasses slipped down his nose a bit.

"What the FUCK do you WANT FROM ME??" He wriggled in Rude's grasp; his ribs aching from their last tussle, protesting the abuse.

Rude's eyes watered. "Just... to stop..." He blinked, tears falling freely.

"I try to run. You chase me. I come back and we seem okay. Then you turn around and shove me away. So I go. I know when I'm not wanted, Rude. I'm not that..." He stopped, finally looking at Rude. "... stupid."

Rude's lip wibbled. "Y-you don't understand..." he stammered, hiccoughing. "...it's not easy to j-just open up l-like that..." he sniffled.

"Yea, I do understand." His voice was softer, but still irritated. "How the hell do you think I felt when those pictures fell out of that envelope? All over the floor. Right in front of YOU? Let's think about it, Rude."

Elena, still plastered against the wall, watched silently.

"And how the hell do you think I f-felt when I found out??" He was sobbing. "An-nd when you said you... you..." Tears backed up in his eyes.

"When I said what?" Reno's body relaxed.

Rude squeezed him even harder as he buried his face in Reno's neck. "Find another par..." his voice gave out as he crumbled into a crying heap.

Reno softened and wrapped his arms around Rude's shoulders, patting him gently. "Hey... I say things I don't mean."

Rude sobbed harder.

"Besides... Who else here would take me, eh? Nobody else can put up with me like you." Rude's sobs softened to mixed sniffle-hiccoughs. Elena took the chance to slip from the room as quietly as she could. At least now they're talking.

"Okay, so what's the issue, here, anyway? Why are we doing this?"

Rude sniffled hard. Very softly he whispered, "I don't want you to go." He hiccoughed again.

"Okay. Then I'll stay. That's settled, right?" He rubbed the back of Rude's neck affectionately. Rude squeezed even more, his grip hard around Reno as his tears rose up over him again. "Rude, you're gonna have to loosen the grip, there. I said I WASN'T going anywhere, alright?" He patted Rude's head. "Okay, so the next thing we need to discuss..." He paused, listening to what he had just said. "God, I sound like Tseng... So what about us, huh? Still friends?"

Rude loosened his death grip and nodded, still sobbing. "Unnnhunnnn," he sniffled.

"Okay, then. See? Not so hard, is it, Big Guy?"

Rude shifted a bit, sobs coming softer. "I thought we always had been." He rubbed an itch on his cheek with Reno's shoulder.

"Yea, but things sometimes... change things. You know, like pictures a friend takes of another friend, you know?" Careful to keep it under his breath, muttered, "Even if they were for my own use..."

Rude sniffled, muffled back in the slender neck, "I don't care about that now..." He went mostly limp. "I can't.... don't...wanna... lose..." He pressed his lips together, trying to hold back more tears.

Reno nuzzled Rude's head. "I don't wanna lose you, Rude. S'why I didn't want you to open that damned envelope in the first place. I figured it was best left with friends as friends, y'know? It's my fault. I shoulda kept denying it. Woulda made things easier."

"Yeah. So then where are we?" He hiccoughed and rolled off of Reno to lie on his side, arm stretched out over top of both their heads. Reno resisted the smartass answer and shivered.

"Eh, still figuring things out, yo. We haven't even touched..." He stopped and shivered again. Seeking comfort, he curled against Rude's chest. "We can just let that go for now."

Rude half-laughed. "You know I hate you sometimes?" He rolled partially back towards Reno, enjoying the feel of his weight being pushed back by someone and wedged himself under Rude.

"Yea. I know." He nuzzled him. "So... Where are we now? Other than right back where we started? Y'know, 'cause..."

"Why is this so difficult?" Rude groaned. Reno burrowed into Rude's warmth and buried his face in his shoulder as Rude continued a bit more loudly than he had intended. "If it makes me... gay... to be where I am...." He paused and stiffened a bit. "Then... why does it have to be so hard to get over?" Reno jerked his head back to look at Rude.

"You think you're gay because of us? Because of this?" He sighed and shook his head. Rude looked a bit flustered.

"Last time I'd seen, you certainly aren't a woman."

Reno rolled his eyes to the ceiling. "Rude... you still have that thing for Tifa, right?"

The bald man shifted a bit. "Well.... yeah... kind-of..."

"Kind of?" He blinked. That really didn't answer anything, whether Rude just thought she was a great fighter or if he wanted more. "Nah, you have to do better than that. Do you like her or don't you?"

Rude mulled it over in his head for a bit. "W'ull... she's nice. And I really get into her fighting style. I really like how she combined traditional Wutaian with Junon..." he stopped, a bit drawn into the topic.

"D'ya wanna bone her?"

He thought about it for another moment and knitted his brow. "I wouldn't say no... If she asked..." He blushed slightly in a way that made Reno smile.

"Then you're not gay. Hell, I'm not gay. I just... never mind..." Rude looked at him from overtop his sunglasses. Reno curled back into Rude and sighed. "So are we a couple? Or are we just friends who screw? Or was it a one night thing?"

Rude laughed heartily and seriously considered the option. "I dunno..." he dodged, squeezing Reno with the arm left draped over him. "I guess it depends on how long we're stuck like this." He jerked his head towards the bunk beds.

"Okay... stuck in separate beds? Cause if being in bed with you means I get to keep you then I can figure a way around that. But if it's only as long as I'm in your room, yo, I'd rather not." Rude laughed deeply again. "So what is it?"

Rude smirked. "I thiiink... I'll have to saaay..." He leaned down and kissed Reno on the lips. Reno, only slightly phased, raised an eyebrow.

"That didn't answer my question, yo."

"You're being pushy..." Rude stated with a fake pout.

"And you're avoiding."

Rude got a bit defensive and rolled a bit back. "Well do I have to answer right now??" He questioned with a blink.

The last thing Reno wanted to do was get into another fight. He and his body had been through enough of that for one night. "Eh. No. You don't have to." He stood and shuffled over to the bunks. "You want this to not be... bunks?"

Rude shrugged from the floor. "I don't even think I can fit in there." He got up and tried to climb in.

"Rude. Gimme a minute, will ya?" He stepped on the edge of the bed and hefted the mattress off the top bunk. He tossed it down on the floor where they had been laying. "Now get up so I can get the other one." Rude crawled out and helped heave the mattress to the floor. Reno walked out to the supply closet and retrieved his blanket, then sprawled himself out onto the mattresses.

"See. Problem solved, yo."

"And you questioned yourself being one of the top men around here," he chuckled.

"If taking a mattress off a bed makes me a top man, they've got some seriously low standards, yo."

Rude flopped down next to Reno laughing, wiping the corner of his eye. "I think they do, man..."

"Yea. They keep me around," he smirked.

Rude rolled onto his back and folded his hands behind his head. "So what's there to do? It's a three day weekend, isn't it?"

"Eh. Yea," he elbowed Reno in the rib.

"What was that for?"

Rude did it again with a lopsided grin and snickered.

"Whaddya want?"

He feigned innocence. "Nuthin'."

"Yea, don't play innocent with me."

"Playing? Who??" He mocked in fake surprise.

Reno pounced him. "You are."

"Oh no. you've got me. Help. Help. Whatever shall I do?"

Straddling him, Reno teased, "Boy that was easy. You're easy, you know that?"

Rude smirked. "Is that so, eh? You wanting to hold to that thought, are you?"

"Well, you're not protesting. At. All." Reno retorted with a smile.

The hairless man laughed heartily, stomach muscles tensing underneath the mischievous redhead. Reno was straddling his stomach, running his hands over Rude's chest under the still zipped uniform jacket. He sighed pleasantly as he tilted his head back, the nimble touch setting to ease much of his built-up stress. Rude shifted and locked Reno's arms underneath the fabric.

Rude smirked. "So who has whom now?" Reno wriggled a bit, then grinned up at the bigger man.

"Oh yea?" came the retort. With an impish grin, Reno slipped his fingers along Rude's sides and started tickling him.

Rude squirmed spastically. "Hey!" he giggled, "That's not fair!" He chuckled and tried to repress the devilish touch. Failing to quell the attack, he returned fire with his own hands. "Let's see how you like it!"

Grabbing the zipper with his teeth, Reno pulled it down, freeing his arms. Rude flushed at the sight of his partner, sucking in his breath at the near proximity the nimble man gained. He looked up with a cocky grin, zipper still tucked between his teeth and dangling out the left side of his mouth.

"Oh, so you like that, do you?"

Rude gently grasped Reno's wrists that rested on his chest and held them where they were, swallowing hard. Things were getting a little bit uncomfortable down below, something he knew Reno could tell merely by where he was sitting. The redhead stuck his tongue out around the zipper and tugged on it again, pulling his head as far back as he could manage, swapping Rude's grip with his own, wrapping his hands around Rude's wrists. He twisted his body so his hip ground against Rude's thigh, the stupid grin never leaving his face. Rude groaned, the added pressure brought a fresh burn to his cheeks, his hands tempered with sweat. The young Turk pulled himself within inches of Rude's face and smiled, his breath brushing light and fast across his cheeks.

"You know, I love that reaction."

Rude felt as if his heart had jumped to the back of his head, while the mint of Reno's toothpaste trailed up his nose. His thoughts disintegrated, rambling as his conscious wrestled to stay focused.

"We have the whole day off tomorrow, Rude. What you got going on?"

He rolled his head no. "Nothin'." His aimless thoughts culminated at where they were last night, two grown men lost deep to the other. His cheeks grew hotter. Reno pressed small kisses along Rude's cheek, loving the feel of his stained skin.