by LikeItLots
... Gordo12. This was adapted from something I wrote to a long-standing 'naughty' internet friend and I should have expanded that far more. I shall take your comments on board and revamp it. Many thanks.
We really don't need to be told foreplay is coming it's kind of obvious reading it.
You don't develop any characters and fail to explain why they were in communication to begin with. It's basically in the door and start fucking. That's just not erotic.
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