All Comments on 'A New Life for Dave'

Man, you need to proofread before submitting.

I gave her a smile, "it's so nice to meet you too, Amy". I said.

"That would be great, Dave" She said.

Periods outside of quotations or just a lack of them to begin with.

Then there's the capitalization of "Okay daddy!" "Sounds great." She replied.

It should be "Okay daddy!" "Sounds great," she replied. with a comma ending the dialog, not a period.

damn grammar Nazi ... why not instead of picking things apart just sit back and enjoy a great story ...I give it five stars

Someone is picky about grammar in a porn story, now that is pathetic. Every time I see someone complain about grammar on a porn story , you think, "That is the stupidest thing I've ever seen". No one cares about grammar on a porn story.